Harbour of Refuge

by Aliyah Burke

  “Part of what you admired about him had to be what he does.”

  “I guess, Mom. I don’t know.” She wanted to hit something, instead she took another drink. “I don’t want to be seen as a babysitter. Sometimes I think he understands, then others, I know I don’t understand him at all.”

  “You need to talk to this young man.”

  “He is going to want children and I can’t give that to him.”

  Her father leant back in his chair. “So now you know what it is he will want? I thought you didn’t understand him.”

  “Why wouldn’t he want children? He has one now and he didn’t even get to see him grow up the first few years.” Why was she feeling defensive? “I don’t know many men who don’t want them.”

  “Is this because Mila is getting married soon?” her mom asked.

  “Is what because…why would her getting married bother me?”

  “Just asking.”

  She shook her head. “Can we just not talk about this anymore, please?”

  “Of course.”

  Halyn didn’t miss the look between her parents but thankfully they dropped it.

  Later that night while she lay in bed, she thought about what they’d said. Yes, she was jealous that Mila was finally getting hitched. When they were girls, they’d talked about the huge weddings and families they wanted. Now it looked like Mila was getting her fairy tale and she was being left behind. Jealous or not, she was happy for her friend. It had been a long time coming.

  She fell asleep with Enzo on her mind and woke with him there too. On nights when I feel okay, do I dream about sex? No, just fighting with him. She rolled her eyes at her overly dramatic thoughts.

  Once dressed, she took a walk with her father into town and they stopped off at the bakery. It hadn’t changed, and she smiled when they entered. The powerful scents reached her and made her stomach growl.

  “Let’s get something,” he whispered.

  “Are you sure you can have this?”

  “We’ll split a bear claw, how about it? We just can’t tell your mother.” He gave her a conspiratorial grin.

  “Okay, you sold me. Grab us a table and I’ll get coffee and the bear claw.”

  After they’d finished, they headed to the hardware store to pick up a few items he needed before walking home again.

  She was in her room when her mom called out to her. “Halyn, honey. You have a visitor.”

  “Be right there, Mom.” Staring at her reflection, she quickly drew her hair back into a ponytail, she didn’t want it in the way while she did a few things around the house for her dad.

  Hurrying down the stairs, she almost tripped over the last one when she saw who waited for her. Chris Knight. Her ex-boyfriend, the one she’d imagined herself marrying. Right up until he…

  “Hello, Halyn.”

  “Chris. What are you doing here?” She walked towards him, amazed that being face to face with him after all that time didn’t make her want to scratch his eyes out or stab him. She was simply apathetic to him.

  “I heard you were in town and came to see you.” He smoothed his hands down his pants. “Can we talk?”

  “Sure, I have some things to do outside.”

  They didn’t speak until she stopped by the shed in the back. “Say your piece, Chris.”

  “I know you probably don’t want to hear this, least of all from me, but I came to apologise.”

  “You’re right. I don’t want to hear it. But you’re here so you may as well get whatever it is off your chest. You don’t have the power to hurt me now.”

  “I know I was an asshole to you and I am sorry. It’s years too late and way overdue but I just didn’t know how to say it.”

  She hooked the tool belt on and shrugged. “Okay.”

  “Do you have anything to say to me?”

  “Not a thing.”

  “Can you forgive me?”

  “Is that what you need? Forgiveness?”

  He rubbed his palms again. “Yes, it would help. I’m trying to get better, Halyn, I down spiralled and hit bottom. You know I drank, it got out of control, part of why I did what I did, and no, it’s not an excuse. I was an ass. That’s all there was to it. But I was that way because I was…am an alcoholic. I’m in a programme, been sober for a year now and am at the step to make amends to you for how poorly I treated you.”

  “I’m sorry to hear that. Consider it amended. It was, as you said, a while ago. I have moved on.” Hefting the shingles she was going to patch the roof with, she moved by him. “I wish you the best.”

  “Wait, Halyn.” He reached out and took her arm in his hand. She froze and looked at him. He wouldn’t meet her gaze for long. “Sorry.” He stepped back. “I shouldn’t have done that. Could we get some coffee?”

  She owed him nothing. Absolutely zero. And yet, she couldn’t help but feel a small bit of sympathy for him. It had to take a lot for him to come to her parents’ house, face them and then her. She glanced at her watch and placed the shingles down before removing her belt.

  “Okay, let’s go.”

  His smile, reminiscent of the ones he used to give her which made her melt, made her feel good now. She was learning to forgive.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  A tall black man opened the door. “Can I help you?”

  “I’m looking for Halyn Jennings.”

  Dark eyes moved up and down his body. “And you are?”

  “Enzo Cassano, sir.”

  “Where’s your son?”

  He hadn’t expected that question. “My son? Is with my brother.” Was it a good thing or bad that he knew about Liev?

  “What are your intentions towards my daughter?”

  Behind him, Enzo could see a woman hovering around. Halyn’s mother, that much he could tell. They had similar features and the same wild, kinky natural curls.

  “For the moment, I would like to get her somewhere she can’t run from me so we could talk.”

  “Do you love her?”

  “Yes.”

  “You know we fathers are very protective of our children. Especially when we’ve only got one and they’re female. There isn’t anything in this world more important to me than my baby girl. She tells me you live life in the fast lane with your racing.”

  That was definitely not a good thing. Enzo shifted and put his hands in his pockets when the woman walked up.

  “Invite him in. Don’t keep him outside.”

  He removed his hat. “Thank you, ma’am.”

  Her smile didn’t quite reach her eyes and he realised she was in mother bear mode.

  “I’m Shawna, and this is my husband Greg.”

  “Nice to meet you both.” Their house, while not huge, bespoke many years of love. It brimmed with it and he saw where Halyn got her style from.

  “Halyn’s not here right now, she’s out in town with a friend. She should be back soon, if you’d care to wait.”

  “Thank you for the offer.” It didn’t take a genius to see the dad wasn’t pleased by that.

  “You have siblings?”

  “Yes, sir. Two brothers and a sister.”

  “Family is important to you, then.”

  “Very much so.”

  Her father grunted and walked to get some coffee. Her mother gave him a tight smile. “We’re very protective of her.”

  “I understand that and trust me I have no wish to hurt her. I’m trying to talk to her.”

  The door opened and he heard her voice. “I’m back, I picked up a few more things for the roof, Chris brought me back. Whose car is in the drive?”

  Everything in his body came alive at that simple phrase. He had to fight from getting up and rushing in there. Instead he remained seated.

  “In the kitchen, honey. You have another visitor.”

  When she stepped into view his breath left him in a rush. She wore a red tank top and blue jeans, which hung low on her hips. Around those very hips sat a tool belt. Her hair, those wonderf
ul strands, drawn tightly back into a ponytail.

  “Enzo,” she said, after her mouth had moved a few times with nothing escaping.

  “Hello, Halyn.”

  “Wh…what are you doing here?”

  He wanted to kiss her. “You left before we could talk.” He headed towards her. Her eyes widened briefly but she didn’t back away. “I figured I had to track you down or you’d never hold still long enough.”

  “I…I have work to do.”

  “I’ll help.”

  “I’ve got it.”

  He held her gaze. “I insist.” He wasn’t even going to ask about Chris. Chris could be a girl.

  You don’t have any say or claim over her.

  The hell he didn’t. It might not have been as sudden for him as it had been Gio, but Enzo had realised she was his woman. “Let’s go.” Glancing behind him, to the couple standing there he added, “It was nice meeting you.”

  She led the way outside and around to the back, not saying a word until they were there.

  “Why are you here?”

  His answer was his kiss. He pulled her tight to him, wrapped his hand in her ponytail and slanted his mouth over hers. She planted her hands flush against his chest, remaining stiff for all of a heartbeat before she sank into him. Melted, pressing as close as she could to him, her nails digging through his shirt to his chest.

  Her whimper was like fire pouring over him. He answered with a rumble and held her even closer. Stroking, licking and teasing her, he kept up his assault on her mouth. She met him and gave as good as she got.

  Slowly it dawned on him where they were. Standing outside her family’s house. With immense reluctance, he ended the kiss and stared down at her. Swollen lips, parted as she breathed heavily. Her eyes overflowed with desire.

  “Why do you think I came after you, sweetheart?”

  “I don’t know.” She backed up and readjusted the fit of her tool belt. “I have to get on the roof and replace some shingles.”

  “Let’s go then, but we’re not going to let this keep going without talking, Halyn Jennings.”

  She muttered under her breath, hefted the shingles then climbed up. He followed and soon they were ripping off the damaged shingles.

  “How are you feeling?”

  “I’m fine, why?”

  “You were sick. Don’t you remember me there taking care of you?”

  She stilled before peering up at him. “That…that wasn’t a dream? You were there?”

  “I was there.”

  “I thought Mila had been there. I dreamt you.”

  “You told me.” She flushed and he laughed. “Don’t look so worried. You didn’t do anything too bad.”

  “Too bad? What’s that mean?” She tossed the shingles over the edge.

  “It means that while you do talk when you’re insanely delirious, I was completely taken by what you divulged.”

  She watched him, eyes wide. “Well?” she demanded when he didn’t speak, just returned her look.

  “Well what?”

  “What did I say?”

  He flashed a sex-filled grin. “Are you sure you want me to tell you?”

  “Enzo!”

  “There was a bit of that.”

  She groaned, dropped her hammer and covered her face. “I’m never going to be able to look at you again.”

  Contrite, he reached for her hand. “Don’t be embarrassed, Halyn. I for one am glad you have such amazing sexual dreams about me.” He tugged on her wrist. “Come on, look at me.”

  Embarrassment all over her features, she did. Touching her gently on the cheek, he released her.

  “Can we talk about it now?”

  “Apparently I don’t need to say anything, you hear it all when I’m sick.”

  “I was talking about what happened between us.”

  There it went, her eyes shuttered and he shook his head. “No, Halyn. That’s not fair. Don’t shut me out.”

  “You made your position clear.”

  “I made a mistake because I was pissed off.”

  She shook her head and he swore. When she moved to the ladder, he beat her there and kicked it to the ground.

  “Are you insane? What are you doing?”

  “Keeping you in one place so you can’t run from me anymore. Christ, Halyn. Does the idea of talking to me make you that sick you can’t even discuss anything?” He expected her to lash back but all she did was sink to the roof and loop her arms over her knees.

  “No.”

  Lowering himself beside her, he mimicked her movements. “I know you think not being able to have children will keep me away, Halyn, but I don’t care. I want you, not your uterus. If…and I mean if we decide to increase the size of our family, there’s always adoption. A child we raise will be ours, just the same, and that’s all I want with you. A chance to have a family. To be a family.”

  He looked at her and frowned when he saw the tears. They streamed from her eyes and she ignored them, staring out over the town.

  “Sweetheart, why are you crying?”

  “I feel like a failure.”

  He gathered her close. “You’re not a failure, Halyn. You are an amazing, loving, kind, generous woman who people meet and you blow them away. You look at the world in a way not so many do anymore. You like the good, tend not to see the bad, in people. Why else would you sleep with your doors unlocked?”

  “I…” The dam broke and she began sobbing. Her father and some man he didn’t know stepped out back.

  “Everything okay? Why’s the ladder on the ground?”

  “She was trying to run again. We’re going to just stay up here until we finish talking.”

  “Who are you?” the man beside Greg asked.

  Enzo cocked an eyebrow. “Who are you?”

  “Her ex-boyfriend.”

  He almost snarled at the man. “You can leave. I’m her current boyfriend and I have no plans on becoming an ex.” Enzo returned his attention to the woman he held, her face plastered to his chest, soaking his shirt. He didn’t care. Not in the slightest. She was back in his arms.

  “I’m sorry,” she mumbled.

  “For what?” He nuzzled her hair, loving the springiness of it. It was addictive to touch.

  “Being so difficult.”

  “Relationships aren’t supposed to be a walk in the park, sweetheart. We both have opinions and mouths. Things are bound to get sticky on occasion.”

  “Sticky? Is that what you’d call it?”

  “Show me a couple who hasn’t argued and fought, Halyn. We’re human, we do that sometimes.”

  He tried to pull back and look at her but she held him tighter. Resting his chin on the top of her head, he stared out over the rooftops. Small town, small-town values and people in everyone else’s business. Even though it was the height of day, only a few cars moved down the streets, a few more people walked, but it wasn’t busy by any means.

  The view was something out of a painting of times long past. Only for the woman in his arms, it wasn’t past. It was very real and she didn’t view the world in the same way he did. He was cynical, figured most people wanted something from him—money, a way in to the racing world, or something else.

  Halyn was different. She saw the good in people, trusted with open arms and heart. And he’d taken advantage of it. That was the sad part, he’d done exactly what he had hated others for trying to do.

  “I’m sorry, too, sweetheart. For how I was.”

  She sat up and wiped her cheeks free of the tears. “I need to fix this. How is Liev doing?”

  He kissed her before settling on the other side of the area needing to be patched. “He’s okay. Doesn’t much like his nanny person. And I can’t say I blame him, she wasn’t right for him.”

  She stiffened but didn’t say anything about it. “How’s his school work coming?”

  “I know he’s glad to be with Jaydee right now, because she can talk to him about things I haven’t a clue on.”


  “Still not caught up to his level of reading yet?”

  “Hell no. He was listening avidly while Jaydee was talking about her work. Gio and I just shook our heads, totally lost.” He hammered in the shingle before lining up the next one. “He speaks Italian now.”

  “Wonderful. Does he talk to you in it?”

  “Doesn’t talk much, still. Bare minimum to get by. Expression is still brooding and serious.” He shook his head. “One day, I’ll get through to him, although Jaydee said she was like that as well, so it may be how they deal. He still doesn’t like being touched much, especially by those he doesn’t know.”

  They finished and he watched her. The afternoon sun bounced off her curls, turning the lighter browns to gold and the darker to silken chocolate. Not fighting the urge, he reached across to where she sat and slid his hand around the nape of her neck.

  “Come here,” he murmured, tugging her close.

  The kiss was tender, the steel rod in his pants insistent. He could get lost in her taste and never seek his way out. Rubbing her neck, he pulled back and stared at her. “Anything else we need up here?”

  “Just the ladder.”

  “Cheeky.”

  She merely grinned. “You go get it, I’ll wait up here.” That said, she lay back on the roof and closed her eyes.

  Enzo watched her for a few moments before he forced himself to look away so he didn’t take her on the roof. The flash of exposed skin on her belly where her shirt rode up tempted him. Her parted lips. Her curves. All of it made him horny as hell.

  At the edge, he looked down and saw her father sitting out there at the picnic table in the backyard, nursing a drink of some kind. Her father got to his feet and put the ladder back up. With a two-fingered salute, Enzo went to the woman lounging. Had a tool belt ever looked so sexy on a woman? He doubted it.

  “Come on, lazy.”

  “You were supposed to take a bit longer than that so I could lie here.”

  “Are you feeling okay?” he asked, immediately concerned.

  “A bit tired, still recovering from being sick.” She sat up. “Are you here for a bit or are you leaving?”

  “Want me to go?”

  She shook her head. “No. I was going to use you to help me do a few more things around here.”