Damaged and the Knight

by Bijou Hunter

  My life was spent waiting for Farah to return home to play with me. Unfortunately, Cooper wanted to play with her too. As soon as they returned home, they played for a while in the shower and bedroom. Hours might pass before they appeared downstairs. Then, we’d either order in or go out, but Farah and Cooper usually had to work on schoolwork when the meal was done.

  “I’m bored,” I told Farah one day.

  Her solution was to invite over Cooper’s mom, sisters, and Skye for lunch that Saturday. Cooper and Tucker decided the estrogen level would be too cringe-inducing, so the muscular blonds left for a mysterious errand.

  Tiny Barbie doll Skye Goldstein was the first to arrive and I immediately felt like she didn’t want to be there. Farah barely paid attention to her because she was so busy goofing around with me. After mumbling a hello, Skye began texting and didn’t stop until Bailey arrived.

  As blonde as Skye, Maddy walked in before Bailey and smiled at me in a weird way. Sensing she was wary of new people, I didn’t blame her since I didn’t enjoy meets and greets either. Farah immediately put her at ease though by asking about the baby. Maddy’s expression lit up as she talked about her little girl and showed off ultrasound pictures from her six month checkup.

  “More lame pictures,” Bailey said as she entered the house wearing a frown. “They’re not even cute.”

  Bailey looked me over before dismissing me with an eye roll. Beautiful, blonde, and bitchy, Bailey was just the way others described her. The minute she walked into the house, everyone’s moods shifted. Well, not the equally blonde Jodi and Sawyer who followed her into the house and ignored her loud behavior while sitting around and making chitchat.

  Surrounded by beautiful blondes, I avoided Bailey and focused on the other women. Yet, Skye showed no interest in me while Maddy hid in her head as soon as Bailey mouthed off. In the kitchen, six year old Sawyer only had eyes for Farah as they baked cookies. Back in the living room, Jodi asked me a few questions about if I liked Ellsberg. Once I smiled and nodded, she was done with me, instead lighting a cigarette while playing with Cooper’s dogs.

  Helping Farah in the kitchen, I really wished everyone would leave. This desire only grew when the time arrived to order pizzas.

  Maddy suddenly awoke from her dream state and smiled. “I’d like mushrooms,” she said, rubbing her belly. “I really crave mushrooms lately.”

  Bailey snorted. “Mushrooms suck and anyone who likes them has shit taste.”

  “It’s the hormones.”

  “Maybe your baby is the one with bad taste then?”

  “You’re kidding, right?” I asked, irritated.

  Bailey turned her grumpy blue-eyed gaze on me. “No, bitch, I’m not.”

  “I like mushrooms. Lots of people do. Just because you don’t like mushrooms doesn’t make them suck.”

  “Fuck you. I have good taste.”

  “Everyone thinks they have good taste.”

  Stepping closer, Bailey glared at me. “Are you saying I’m lying?”

  Staring right into Bailey’s challenging expression, I said, “I’m saying you have an opinion, but that doesn’t make you right. In my opinion, you’re wrong about mushrooms.”

  “And you think we’re equals, do you, bitch?”

  “Stop calling me a bitch.”

  “Did you just fucking tell me what to do, bitch? Be careful with your answer because I’ve hit people for less than what you’ve said.”

  Everyone around us looked ready to freak including a terrified Farah. I just stood up and glared right back at Bailey.

  “You can hit me, but it won’t make you right. It’ll just make you a thug.”

  “A thug?” she hissed.

  “You aren’t always right, Bailey. I don’t care who your family is. You’re still just a person like me.”

  “I’m better than you.”

  “Based on the way you’re acting now, you’re not better than most people.”

  As Bailey balled her hands into fists, I waited for the blow, but refused to back down. I didn’t know why she irritated me so much, but I wanted someone to tell her to shut up. Apparently, I would have to be that person.

  “Fuck you, bitch,” Bailey muttered, storming out of the house.

  Jodi grinned. “I think she likes you,” she said, lighting another cigarette. “Anyone else and she’d have knocked you on your ass.”

  When Farah stepped closer to me, I realized I was shaking. “Are you okay?”

  “Yes. She just pissed me off.”

  “She pisses everyone off, but we don’t say anything,” Skye said, again texting. “My face is my best quality next to my tits, so I don’t go around trying to get it punched in.”

  “I’m proud of you,” Farah whispered.

  Maddy smiled. “We should get extra mushrooms to celebrate.”

  As Farah ordered the pizzas, I wondered if Bailey had gone. Instead, I found her on the front porch, glaring at a passing woman pushing a stroller.

  “Power walking is for losers,” she muttered.

  “So you say.”

  Bailey glanced at me. “Did you come out here to be a bitch again?”

  “You started it.”

  “You think I’m shit.”

  “I think you’re rude. I’ve heard you’re funny too. I wish you’d just be funny.”

  “So people can laugh at me?”

  “Laugh with you,” I said, sitting next to her on the porch swing.

  Bailey frowned. “You think your shit doesn’t stink.”

  “I think I’m a loser, but that doesn’t mean you should treat people the way you do.”

  “Coop and Tuck act like assholes and everyone thinks they’re fucking great. I act the same way and get shit on.”

  “If it makes you feel any better, I don’t like when Coop and Tuck act like assholes either.”

  Bailey gave me a tiny grin. “You think I’m a bitch.”

  “I think you’re insecure and you think being really loud and rude will hide this fact. It doesn’t.”

  “Why do you think you’re a loser?”

  “I’m not good at anything and people tend to forget I exist.”

  “Forget?”

  “Like when I was in second grade, I played a lot with this girl at school. She was the only friend I ever had besides Farah. Her name was Peggy and we played every day. We were best friends, but then I moved to another school. When I came back the next year, I was excited to see her, but she didn’t even remember my name. It was like knowing me meant nothing to her.”

  “That’s just one idiot bitch.”

  “My grandmother calls me Tanya.”

  “Your grandmother is an idiot bitch too.”

  “How do you know?”

  “She can’t remember your name. That makes her an idiot bitch.”

  Grinning, I scooted closer. “Do you want people to like you or do you like having them scared of you?”

  “I don’t know. Can’t I have both?”

  “Probably, but you scare away the people you want to like you. Maybe you could be like Coop who is nice to his friends, yet scary to everyone else? That way, you could have people like and fear you.”

  “I don’t know how to be any different. I’ve always been loud and rude. I like being that way most of the time, but I never seem to keep friends or boyfriends. I guess changing might help, but I don’t know when I’m being rude. It’s just how I am.”

  “I could help you.”

  “Like a pity case?”

  “I don’t pity you, Bailey. You’re beautiful and rich. You have shit handed to you, so I’m not feeling sorry for you. I just think you might be a fun friend, if you could stop screaming in my face.”

  Bailey smiled brightly. “You thought I would hit you.” When I nodded, her smile grew. “I was going to hit you too, but you looked pretty badass standing up to me and I didn’t want to ruin that moment for you.”

  “See? You’re nice, but you hide it.”

  �
�Nice means weak.”

  “Maybe with guys, but we’re not guys. Pretending we are doesn’t work. We should be our best. I want to improve myself too. Get stronger and accomplish stuff, so I’m not just mooching off Farah and Cooper.”

  “So you want to be my friend then?”

  “Only if you promise to stop threatening me over mushrooms.”

  “You started that.” Squinted at her, I frowned and Bailey laughed. “You look funny when you give me your pissed face. You should work on that.”

  “I will, if you work on your big mouth.”

  “Okay, but Maddy gets too much attention with her stupid baby bump.”

  “Maybe Maddy’s not used to getting attention though? Besides, she’s cooking up your niece. Aren’t you excited about the chance to be the cool aunt?”

  Bailey grinned again. “Yeah, but won’t Farah be the cool aunt?”

  “She’ll be the nice aunt who kisses their ouchies and plays games with them. You’ll be the aunt that feeds them candy and lets them stay up late.”

  “Cool is better than nice.”

  “They’re both nice qualities.”

  Bailey sighed. “Yes, I can see that. Or at least, I can lie and pretend I agree.”

  “Sometimes, lying is the only nice way to handle a situation.”

  “I have no problem lying. So less big mouth and more lying. Sounds like a plan.”

  “Do you want to come back inside? Farah ordered your meat pizza.”

  Bailey stood up and stretched. “I have shitty friends. They always run away or just laugh like everything I say is great. I want someone who can be honest, but likes me. Can you be like that?”

  “I can try.”

  Bailey took my hand. “I can be a good friend. I’m loyal and will hold your hair when you puke.”

  “I don’t plan to puke much, but that’s good to know. I’ll hold your hair too.”

  When Bailey smiled, she seemed younger than earlier. Her angry bitch wall was down and I just saw the insecure girl underneath. We returned to the kitchen where she fake apologized to Maddy. Jodi laughed through the whole thing while Sawyer threw chips at her older sister. Yet, Bailey fake laughed like she wasn’t irritated by her family.

  Farah caught my gaze and I saw pride in her eyes. I wasn’t sure why she was proud of me, but I’d take the compliment. Farah’s love was the only thing I really had to hold onto anymore. Well, now I had Bailey’s friendship.

  Chapter Eight

  On a Tuesday while I napped through Charmed, Cooper returned home without Farah. I tried to ignore him while I dozed, but he hovered over me and kept talking really loudly to the dogs that were also ignoring him while napping. Finally, Cooper knelt in front of me and sighed loud enough in my face to blow my hair around.

  “I’m proposing to Farah this Friday.”

  My eyes popped open. “Hot shit.”

  “I’ve got the ring,” he said, opening a little box and showing off the big shiny rock my sister would likely piss herself over. “I’m taking her out to dinner and popping the question. She’ll say yes, of course, but I want her to come home and squeal with you.”

  Sitting up, I looked at the ring and shivered. “She’s going to lose her mind.”

  “Yeah,” Cooper said, grinning. “I need you to keep my secret and deck the place out with rose petals. Oh, and light candles. You know, really romance the place up while we’re gone. Can you do that?”

  “Hell yeah.”

  “Hell yeah indeed.”

  Imagining Farah’s reaction, we shared a conspiratorial smile. Three days later, everything was in place for her surprise. It had taken all of my self-control not to say anything. I did tell the dogs at one point, just so I could tell someone. The dogs weren’t impressed.

  Farah appeared for their fancy dinner, wearing a red dress. I stared in awe at her as she walked downstairs.

  “What?” she asked, running her fingers through her hair. “Do I look like shit?”

  “You look like a goddess.”

  Farah gave me the most beautiful smile. “Wait until you see Cooper. We had to get dressed three times because he looked so damn hot.”

  “That’s right,” Cooper said, strutting down the stairs in a slick black suit. “Feel free to shudder in awe, ladies.”

  Laughing, we both admired how finely the suit fit his strong body. Farah glanced at me and squinted.

  “You’re lucky you’re my sister or else I’d be outraged at you looking at him like that.”

  “Hey, I’m lonely and there’s eye candy shaking his ass. How can you expect me not to drool?”

  Farah grinned then looked at Cooper who really was shaking his ass. “I’m dancing tonight, Farah,” he said, wiggling his eyebrows. “I’m sexing you up on the dance floor with everyone watching, so get ready to be embarrassed and horny at the same time.”

  Laughing again, I hugged Farah who looked flustered by Cooper’s hotness. “Have fun tonight.”

  “If you’re really lonely, you could come with us.”

  Standing behind Farah, Cooper signaled how I might be killed slowly if I said yes. I flipped him off and smiled at a confused Farah.

  “I’ll be fine. In fact, Bailey might come over later. Just have fun with Coop the Poop over there.”

  Farah hugged me once more then took Cooper’s arm as they left for their special dinner. The minute the door closed, I started running around the house. Lighting scented candles in their bedroom and bathroom was first, so they’d have plenty of time to smell up the place. A CD with romantic songs from Journey and Asia sat ready to play. Finally, I spread fresh pink and red rose petals on the bed, bedroom floor, and hallway. It smelled like a garden, almost nauseatingly so. Yet, Farah was going to love it.

  Bailey didn’t come over because I told her I had a stomach ache and might spend most of the night on the toilet. She still offered to hang out and hold my hair, but I said no. Mostly, I worried if she knew what was happening that she would tell everyone. Cooper wanted the proposal to be private. Only Tucker and Jodi knew. Cooper trusted his mother to keep a secret and knew his brother wasn’t keen on having his face bashed in, so they were safe. Anyone else might blab including Bailey.

  Sitting alone in the living room with the dogs, I watched Arrested Development reruns and ate Ramen noodles. I really was living the dream.

  Even bored, I couldn’t wait to see Farah’s face when they returned. Some days, all I could remember was how afraid she had been growing up. I hoped seeing her so happy might help erase a few of those horrible memories.

  Farah entered the house swinging in Cooper’s arms. Laughing and kissing his neck, she nearly lunged at me when I appeared at the foyer.

  “We’re getting married!” she squealed and Cooper smirked.

  Her excitement infectious, we both squealed and jumped up and down while Cooper enjoyed his girl’s happiness.

  “We already set a date,” she finally said when our squeals ended. “Valentine’s Day. How romantic.”

  When Farah looked to Cooper, a moment passed between them and I knew they needed alone time. A lot of naked alone time, preferably upstairs behind closed doors.

  “We’ll start planning tomorrow,” I said, allowing her to make her getaway with Cooper who did look pretty fantastic in his suit.

  Farah smiled then took Cooper’s hand as they hurried upstairs. The minute she saw the rose petals, she started cooing over him and I doubted they made it to the bed before stripping naked.

  Returning to the living room where the dogs sat annoyed by all of the squealing, I got comfortable with the remote. Upstairs my sister was desperately in love and starting a beautiful life with a man who accepted her completely. I had been so certain I would find the same joy with Judd, but nearly two weeks had passed and he hadn’t found a single lame excuse to see me. I really was out of his life and he’d moved on as if we’d never met.

  Excitement over Farah’s engagement mixed with a growing sadness over how I was simp
ly mooching off her life. Besides cleaning the house and taking care of the dogs, I had no purpose. Soon, I’d have to step away from Farah and build a life of my own.

  Chapter Nine

  For my upcoming birthday, Cooper agreed to pay for me to get a tattoo, but only if I went to Aaron. Considering the angel tattoo on Cooper was my inspiration and Aaron was the artist who inked it, I wasn’t planning to go to anyone else.

  The tattoo shop was between a sub sandwich place and a pawn shop in a rather new shopping center. Bailey opened the door then glared at a girl walking by on the sidewalk.

  Noticing my confusion, she shrugged. “The bitch knows what she did.”

  Nodding, we walked into the waiting area where the walls were covered with designs.

  “So do you want a flash tattoo?” Bailey asked.

  “What’s that?”

  “A standard type tattoo like on the wall. A heart or eagle head. Aaron can churn those out in a few hours.”

  I looked at the walls with the flash designs. “I want a fallen angel.”

  “Sounds complicated. Good thing Aaron is good because I wouldn’t trust just anyone to ink you.”

  Likely hearing his name, Aaron appeared from the back of the shop. Having met him in passing, I found Cooper’s childhood friend to be a curious mix between gentle poet and scary biker. On one hand, he had a shaved head, a cobra tattoo up his neck, and tended to ride his Harley so fast through town that he was forever getting ticketed. On the other hand, he dressed rather preppy and was considered an amazing artist.

  “Sorry,” Aaron said. “The girl who worked out front quit and I’m here alone.”

  “She wants a really cool tat. Don’t fuck it up,” Bailey nearly yelled. Frowning, I shook my head at Bailey who sighed. “Please, don’t fuck it up.”

  Aaron just grinned. “I heard you were training Bailey, so this should be fun. Do you know what kind of tattoo you’re interested in?”

  “A fallen angel on my back, around the right shoulder. I like how sad the angel looks on Cooper’s tattoo, but I don’t know what else it should be like.”