Hard Sacrifice (Savage Saviors MC Book 4)

by J. C. Allen

  I sat for a long time in silence. As usual with Chuck, my mind and my compassion wanted two different things.

  “Let me think on it,” I said, something of a lie—I wasn’t sure I could ever give a fair answer. But if I delayed long enough, maybe Derek would solve the problem for me and I wouldn’t have to worry about it. “I could use a glass of wine to figure that out.”

  “Oh,” he said with a surprising cringe.

  “What?”

  He bit his lip, sighed, and gave a short chuckle.

  “I actually threw away all of my alcohol,” he said, shocking me. “After what I did to you, I knew I couldn’t drink like that. The issues obviously go beyond drinking, but I wasn’t going to make an ass of myself any longer. So it’s all gone.”

  “Really,” I said, pleasantly surprised.

  “Not gonna say it’s been easy,” he said with a half-shrug. “I’m not an alcoholic, but I do enjoy my evening drink and my ‘decompress’ drink. So it felt odd. But I think it’s for the best.”

  “You did that for me?”

  He nodded, leaving me speechless. No one did these kinds of things for me. Guys had bought me gifts, sure, but no one had ever committed to a lifestyle change for me. This was… this was…

  “Wow,” I said, feeling emotional. “Derek… are you sure?”

  “Positive.”

  “Not even one glass of wine?”

  He shrugged his shoulders a couple of times, as if to convince himself as much as he was me of his answer.

  “It’s not like I had a come to Jesus moment and went to a dozen AA meetings in the time you were gone. It was more the awareness that it wasn’t productive and my drinking had caused our fight. So, maybe in a couple of weeks, I’ll be good? But right now, I’m good.”

  I just couldn’t believe it. I just… no one did this!

  Except Derek.

  For whatever bad thing he may have said, it is nothing compared to his actions. Derek Knight cares about you.

  Nothing more needs to be said.

  “You are too much, Derek,” I said as I wiped a tear away. “I knew I loved you.”

  “And I love you too, Eve.”

  He came over to me, gently placed his hands on my face, and kissed me softly.

  For a few seconds, it felt like a tender, gentle kiss. And it was just that—sweet, soft, and romantic.

  But…

  After a few seconds of kissing him, I was in the mood for something a little more… physical. A little more heated. A little more…

  Erotic.

  I pulled him in, moaning, and pressed my tongue into his. We kissed like this until I could barely breathe, only then pulling up for a breath of air.

  “Thanks, Derek,” I said. “Made me go a couple of days without this. Jerk.”

  He smiled again at me and moved back towards me. I gasped as he lifted me off the ground by my ass. He smirked at me with the look I’d seen whenever he got into that mood of his—and I loved it.

  “It’s been a couple of days for me too. But now, it’s time to show you my thanks,” he whispered into my ear, the lustiness of his voice immediately turning me on.

  “Mmph,” I groaned into his mouth.

  And, just like that, Derek Knight carried me off towards the bedroom, leaving behind the fights, the difficulties, and the arguments of the previous few days.

  Good riddance.

  Hello, hedonism with Derek.

  Moaning, my passion for him intensifying with each step, I wrapped my legs around his waist as he carried me to the bedroom. He smirked, throwing me down on the bed. I watched him, my body thrumming in anticipation.

  I needed this so bad and I could tell it was the same for him. It may have only been two days since we had last talked, but it was far longer since we’d been naked with each other—far, far too long. I glanced down at the bulge in his pants and smirked, crawling forward in the bed.

  “Let me help with that,” I said, cooing as I began to unzip his pants.

  He watched, slipping out of his shirt as I pulled both his pants and boxers down. His cock sprung out, fat and eager, begging for my touch. Oh, he had definitely gone for some period of time without release—the only real question now was how much stamina he could have with such delay in gratification.

  I happily began to answer that question, leaning down and wrapping my mouth around his head and beginning to work my way deeper. I moaned, sucking his cock as I let my tongue run ahead, tracing a path for the rest of my mouth to follow. I felt his hands move to my head, gently working to follow the pace I set. There was power in that grip, enough to pull me all the way down if he wanted to—something that plenty of weaker men had done before—but, with him, his hands were just there for the ride, occasionally weaving through my hair but never taking control.

  I loved that about him.

  I could fully trust him.

  And after the last few days? That would never change. And I suspected it never would for him again either.

  I moaned, running my tongue over his cock one last time before pulling back.

  I didn’t want to waste his release in my mouth. He was already getting harder and stiffer—I needed a little pleasure too.

  Watching me pull away, he smirked, misinterpreting my motivation, and said, “Mm! My turn.”

  And then he was pushing me back on the bed. I suppose I could live with this.

  I let him. I let myself fall back, loving the feel of his bed—now that he was sharing it with me again, now that I was on sheets with him—and watched him work, shivering in pleasure as he began to slip my top off.

  He grinned, throwing my shirt away and began to work on my bra. I let him work, watching my chest rise and fall from my heavy breathing. I knew that even the smallest touch from him was about to set me off.

  I was desperate for him.

  I needed him.

  And that was literal—I truly needed him, or else I would lose my mind.

  The only question now was how long would I last before my first climax?

  He answered just as I had him, moving his head down and capturing one of my nipples between his lips. He suckled gently as his other hand squeezed my other breast, not wanting either to go without attention. I gasped, arching against his touch. I was already so close to losing it and he’d only begun to play with my breasts.

  The answer is not nearly as long as he will, apparently.

  Good.

  Every time we made love, it was an explosion of all my senses, and the time apart didn’t seem to have lessened this at all. I moaned as he finally moved from my breasts, moving down my taut stomach as he began to slip my skirt off, taking the panties off in one quick motion. In mere seconds, I was full bare to him.

  I wouldn’t have it any other way. He grinned down at me, admiring the way I looked, causing me to become that much more crazed. Was there a word beyond “need?” Because that’s what I was feeling right now.

  “Hurry,” I said, embarrassed to find that I was panting.

  “Not just yet,” he said, his eyes continuing to take in the sight of my naked body under his. “I’m going to relish this moment just a little—”

  “Please, Derek,” I pleaded, arching up, begging for his touch. “Don’t make me wait any longer!”

  He smirked at me. I knew damn well he was getting off on this—I could see it by the way his cock was twitching.

  And he didn’t want to move in on this?!?!?

  “Alright, as you wish,” he said, finally moving to touch me.

  “Bout damn—”

  I gasped as his fingers slid inside me and my body began to climax. I gasped, still in shock at how easily he’d just made me come. I didn’t think I would ever get used to just how much power he had over my body. And I didn’t mind that one bit.

  I moaned, watching as he began to move, his eyes on mine as he watched me come to his touch.

  “You are so fucking sexy,” he said, his voice rough with lust.

 
I couldn’t fucking take it anymore. He’d barely touched me and I’d come as if by magic. I needed him. I fucking, fucking needed him!

  “Derek,” I panted. “Inside me. Right now!”

  “Deal,” he said, seeming to not be able to wait any longer either.

  I watched him move to the nightstand and slipped a condom out of the drawer. I shivered, desperate to have him inside me. I had been on birth control and a part of me promised that the next time we had sex, I’d tell him. I wanted to feel him inside me fully, no condoms, no nothing.

  But right now, I couldn’t wait. I needed him too badly to even speak. Hell, I could barely moan I was so eager for his touch.

  Within seconds, he was buried to the hilt inside me. I cried out, my second orgasm undoing me as I fell back against the bed.

  He didn’t stop this time, didn’t wait for me to finish coming. He began to move, his thrusts wild with the passion we both felt. I let him move, crying out in pleasure as he moved like a wild animal over me. I gasped, arching back in bliss as he continued to pick up the pace, seeming to be possessed.

  The pleasure was almost unbearable. I could feel myself coming undone from just how wild he was. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to last much longer, my body was growing weak from just how much exertion it was taking.

  But I didn’t have to worry much longer. I watched Derek’s face twist in raw passion and I could tell he was close. Next time, not waiting this fucking long to do this again.

  “Gonna cum,” he said through gritted teeth.

  “M-me too,” I gasped more than said.

  Another orgasm swept through me. My body fell back, weakening from just how intense this all was. I shivered, watching as Derek groaned, arching back as he began to release inside me. The two of us got lost in our releases and before long, we both fell back, panting hard.

  I’m not sure how long I just lay there, trying to catch myself, trying to regain control of my muscles and my sense of being, but Christ, it was a long, long time. The combination of delayed pleasure, relief from settling our arguments, and just the great sex we always had had knocked out my body without knocking out my consciousness. I just controlled what I could—which was my breathing—as my sense of being slowly, steadily came back.

  Not that I was in a particular rush to bring it back, mind you. The feeling of having lost all control was a feeling borne of the best kind of pleasure. A pleasure that I knew I’d get to experience again in… I don’t know, twenty minutes, maybe.

  I turned on the bed, smiling up at him, my body tingling from the pleasure still.

  “That was amazing,” I said, grinning.

  Just saying those words gave me a near-orgasmic shiver down my spine.

  “It was,” he said, smiling back and turning towards me. “I think it’ll always be that intense with us.”

  “Yeah?” I asked, chuckling softly. “That both elates and terrifies me.”

  “Why does it terrify you?” he said, raising an eyebrow and having a smirk form on his face.

  “Because!”

  You’re playing coy, buddy. OK. I see how it is!

  “You’ve got some wicked power over me and I don’t know if my brain will be able to handle how many orgasms I have when you touch me. You are… you are unbelievable. I might pass out sometime!”

  “I think somehow you’ll manage,” he said, leaning forward and kissing my forehead.

  Uh huh.

  “I appreciate your faith,” I said, giggling and leaned in more, snuggling against his chest. “But you’re too much, Derek.”

  A pause came as I listened to his heart come down from the orgasm. It had a nice beat to it, as if in sync with my own. Our hearts are one, in so many ways.

  “I love you, Derek.”

  The words felt so simple, but there could be nothing more profound than what I had felt in that moment. There was certainly nothing more truthful. If Derek wanted the truth, he got it—I loved him.

  If all of the world crumbled around its lies, then I could say that I had that one truth to cling to.

  “I love you too,” he said as he wrapped his arms around me.

  And he feels the same way.

  I was back where I belonged finally. Wrapped in Derek’s arms, I felt safe and secure. With him by my side, I knew nothing could go wrong.

  I fell asleep feeling both elated and terrified for what was to come—but for once, being terrified was a kind of pleasant foreboding instead of a mortal worry.

  9

  Derek

  I was somewhat in disbelief that I had actually won Eve back.

  No, that wasn’t right. I couldn’t say that I had “won” her. She wasn’t a prize to be displayed at the carnival, although she certainly was someone I didn’t mind showing off, especially to my brothers at the Savage Saviors.

  It was more appropriate to say that I had properly showed her what I really thought about her. And, bless Eve’s soul, she was willing to take the risk and come back to me.

  And all it had taken was a decision to go sober indefinitely—a decision I was not regretting in the slightest, most especially since I had woken up the next day feeling as refreshed as I would after a giant steak meal.

  Life seemed awfully great that particular morning. Not only did I have Eve back, I was making myself a better person. I was learning from my mistakes. My dad, I dared to say, might even be a little bit proud of the person I was becoming.

  Everything was great. Except for one small part.

  A part of me still hated the idea of leaving Eve as I did to go take care of business.

  Having finally come back around from such an awful episode, and having all of the information out on the table, made the process of turning my back to her unbearable. On the one hand, there was the rekindled affection; it was almost physically painful to pull apart what had been so recently and tightly reknit. On the other, while knowing that the Black Falcons were hunting for Eve—and outright gunning for me—was bad enough, but knowing that Chuck would be hunting for her as well… the very thought made me shiver with disgust.

  A part of me—quite a great deal of me, in fact—aggressively, morbidly, and violently loathed the idea of leaving Eve alone while I went out to handle Saviors business.

  Especially after how we’d woken up. Let’s just say that waking up with the linger of Eve’s love on my taste buds left me wanting even more. Not that she minded—I was pretty sure it was a dual kind of pleasure.

  It was almost enough to get me to U-turn the chopper and go back for a second helping… OK, more like a third or fourth helping.

  And yet, somehow, by some strange miracle, I’d managed to wake up, turn from temptation, go through the motions of getting ready, holding back as I kissed Eve goodbye, and get out and onto the road. Ironically enough, it had been the process of being around Eve that made it possible to leave her—to be physically around her was to understand how important it was to go out and ensure her protection.

  Still, for as much as this decision sucked, I knew it was the kind of short-term pain necessary for long-term peace of mind. Get away from Eve to diminish the Black Falcons so there wouldn’t be a Black Falcons in the future. It didn’t necessarily make leaving her easier, but once I’d gotten onto the chopper and was on the road, it did make it easier not to turn around.

  Somewhat.

  I was halfway to Roost’s when I noticed the sky beginning to darken. This didn’t surprise me, as the forecast had predicted a chance of showers. The bubbly cartoon clouds blocking out a jagged cartoon sun made it obvious to even a child what to expect, but there was still something…

  Something surprisingly pleasant about it.

  Yeah, most people would have thought about it being a darkness coming, a warning of turbulence ahead, but I preferred to see it as the equivalent of yellow lights on the road. In themselves, they weren’t bad; they were just warnings to either hurry the hell up to beat it or to slow down so one could handle the harsh conditions better.r />
  And given my recent brushes with death and my demons, let’s just say I wasn’t one to hurry as much as I had before.

  However, when the massive boom of thunder echoed in the distance, I couldn’t pretend it was all not-so sunshine and rainbows. There was an element of foreboding in the elements of the clouds and storm, and to pretend anything otherwise was disingenuous at best.

  Still, I didn’t want to take the growing cloud coverage as a bad omen. I didn’t want to wave adios to my good mood, to my good intentions, or to my good humor. But if I didn’t wave them off, it seemed I’d be turning my back on them rudely as they left.

  I didn’t want to think that something as random and inconsequential as the weather could mean anything more than nature was taking its course, or that the world, regardless of the Saviors and the Falcons and regardless of me and Eve and the rest of the goings-on of the city, was moving on as it always had.

  I caught myself whispering Eve’s name, and as I did I cranked the handle and brought the needle abruptly to the triple digits.

  No! Slow down, Derek!

  And so, just as I had thrown out the bottle of booze a few days ago, I let go of my desire for speed and let myself fall…

  Well, I wasn’t quite ready to go only the speed limit. I wasn’t a grandpa, not yet. I had to ease my way into that part of my life. I put the bike at about 55 in a 45 mph zone—it felt like I was going with the flow of traffic but wasn’t driving so insanely that I was risking life and limb just to do a drive I did every day.

  It felt…

  Oddly good.

  Of course, if Eve ever got in trouble, or if the Black Falcons came roaring back with an attack, I knew how to rev it up to triple digits and drive without death…

  But for now, I had to go with the surprisingly pleasant sensation.

  A few minutes later, I pulled up to the shop, seeing Roost already waiting for me.

  “Didn’t expect to see ya so soon,” Roost said, waiting until I joined him before we walked to the office. “I’da thought yer lady and ya would be at it still.”

  “Oh, don’t worry, that got taken care of,” I said with a smirk. “But this business is as much for her protection as it is ours.”