Shattered Souls

by Alison Mello

  She shrugs. “Just thinking about how lucky I am that you walked into my life.”

  I chuckle. “We walked into each other’s lives and I think I’m the lucky one. You’ve managed to help me, too.”

  Her brows furrow. “How have I helped you?” She’s full of confusion.

  I sigh. “You’ve helped me forget I’ve once had problems of my own, you turned my nightmares into sweet dreams, and for the first time in a long time I wake up with a smile on my face.”

  Her cheeks turn a beautiful shade of pink as she fights the smile on her face. “You need to stop.” She has laughter in her voice. “Mmm. This is so good.” She moans. “However, you never have to stop cooking for me.” I laugh and we both go into a comfortable silence finishing our dinner.

  After we’ve cleaned up and I’ve packed some lasagna for her to take home things get awkward for a second. We’re both standing in my clean kitchen with wine glasses in hand, looking into each other’s eyes wondering the same thing. What now? Part of me is dying to take her to bed and bury myself deep inside her. We’ve been seeing each other for weeks now, and although we’ve done a great job of taking care of each other it’s not the same, and I know she feels the same. “Shall we watch another old movie?” Her silky voice breaks me from my thoughts.

  I give her a devilish grin. “Is that what you really want to do?”

  She shakes her head. “Not really, but I can’t handle rejection today.” She blushes and looks to the floor.

  With my finger tucked under her chin, I force her eyes back on mine and rub my thumb along her soft lips. “No rejection tonight.” I slowly lower my lips to hers, slipping my hands into her hair at the nape of her neck. Breaking the kiss, I look into her eyes. “Tonight is all about showing you how you make me feel, and what you do to me.”

  “How do you know it’s the right time?” She drinks down the last of her wine.

  “That’s simple. You spent time with me and didn’t make it about the sex, and now I want to ease your fears and take away your pain.” As soon as she set her wine glass down on the counter I scoop her up into my arms. She nuzzles my chest and inhales my scent. A small smile spreads across her face. When we step into my room she gasps at the scene. There are small candles lit and flowers scattered all over the place.

  “No one has ever done anything like this for me before.” I can hear the emotion in her voice as I set her down on the center of the bed.

  “But wait, there’s more,” I tease, referring to an infomercial we were watching the other night and poking fun at. She giggles and lies still as I remove the flats from her feet.

  Lying beside her I pick up where we left off in the kitchen. Our kiss is slow, gentle, and sweet. Our tongues meet dancing together at a waltz’s pace. It’s sensual and sending all kinds of signals to my cock. He’s alert and ready to go. Staring into her eyes I realize I have so much I want to say but I’m scared. Scared to ruin the moment, and scared she’ll run away, so I kiss up her jaw line instead, pausing to nibble on her earlobe as my finger make their way up her flat stomach under her shirt. The whimpers and moans that escape her lips is driving me crazy, I’m struggling to hold onto the last bit of control I have. My cock is throbbing in my shorts, screaming for release.

  Peeling her shirt off her body, I toss it to the other side of the room and make quick work of her pale pink, lace bra. She has the most perfect perky breasts I’ve ever seen. Kissing down the valley of her breasts I leave a trail all the way to the medic tattoo she has on her rib cage. “I. Love. Your. Tattoos.” I tell her between kisses and I truly do. They are a perfect representation of who she is. She only has three and they are feminine but also show how strong she is.

  “Really? I’ve had guys tell me they don’t like them because they say tattoos are not feminine.” She really sounds surprised and I’m shocked. I think she did amazing picking tattoos that are perfect for her.

  “I think this one is my favorite.” I kiss over the words, ‘Live for my God, Die for my Country’. She has it written on the side of her body where it would only show if she was wearing a two piece bathing suit. She lights up looking genuinely happy as my fingers trail up her body to her breasts. I take one in each hand and massage them, lowering my lips to one while I continue to play with the other. In true Lexi fashion her fingers are already in my hair, pulling at it as I suck and nibble on her hardened nipple. Hooking my thumbs into her leggings, I begin working them down over her hips, peeling them down her long toned legs. She’s lying gloriously naked in the center of my bed, her long brown hair fanned out over my pillow and her legs parted just enough to show me she’s wet for me.

  She bites her lip as I run my hand up the inside over her leg until I’m at her apex. Pinning her legs down with my arms I part her and lick at the juices running down her ass, and as always, she’s so fucking delicious she has my cock twitching beneath me. She sucks in a sharp breath as I slowly lick at her clit, sucking it into my mouth and rolling my tongue over her tasty bud.

  “Keegs,” she pants. “I’m going to fucking explode.”

  The thought makes me smile. There’s nothing I love more than my girl exploding all over me. I slip two fingers inside her, curling them as I continue to feast on her sweet pussy. Her legs begin to shake and her breathing is out of control. She suddenly locks her legs around me and screams my name. “Keegs, please.” Knowing she wants more, I don’t let up for one second. I lick her clit harder and faster applying more pressure, finger fucking her as I do. “Holy shit.” Another orgasm tears through her body. Pulling my fingers from inside her I slip them into my mouth and suck them clean as I stare into her eyes and watch a blush creeps up her beautiful face.

  Opening the nightstand drawer I grab a condom and roll it over my throbbing cock before settling myself between her legs. “I’m so glad we waited for this.”

  “Me too.” A tear rolls down her cheek.

  “Why the tears?” I quickly swipe them away.

  She closes her eyes and whispers, “Because I’m afraid of what you’ve come to mean to me already.”

  I press my lips to hers. “That’s what tonight is all about, showing you what you mean to me.” I slip my cock inside her tight pussy. Her eyes go wide and she moans at the feeling of me inside her for the first time. “Damn baby, you feel so good.” I start rocking my hips slowly hoping to hold onto some ounce of control, but she’s so tight and she feels so good there’s no way I’m going to last. I pick up the pace burying myself deeper and deeper each time. She’s rocking her hips meeting me thrust for thrust. I’m so close, but I’m not ready for the moment to be over yet so I still myself balls deep inside her.

  She looks at me concerned. “Why did you stop?” My mouth crashes down on hers. Our tongues collide and all the passion we feel for each other is poured into this kiss. She pulls at my hair breaking the kiss to nibble her way to my ear. She whispers, “Make love to me.” I look deep into her blue eyes and I see it. I see the love she has for me. She may not have said it but she doesn’t have to, I know it’s there.

  I grab her legs behind her knees, press them to her chest, and begin rolling my hips. Once again I pick up the pace and slam cock-deep inter her warm, wet pussy.

  “Give it to me, Lexi. I can’t hold on anymore.” I continue my assault until her body finally caves and starts squeezing my cock. It’s my undoing. I seat myself deep inside her one last time and unload all I have. Supporting my weight on my elbows, I press my lips to hers one more time. I love the way she feels underneath me, and I’m not ready to give that up yet. “Please tell me you’re spending the night.”

  She giggles. “I’m spending the night. I have an overnight bag in the car in case you wanted me to stay.”

  I rub my nose on hers. “If I had my way, you’d never leave.”

  “How about we start with one night at a time?”

  “Sounds good. I’ll be right back.” I run to the bathroom to take care of business, and when I get back she’s lyi
ng under the blankets with the TV on. She’s flipping through the channels looking for something to watch when she settles on a really old FBI show. “I’ve always watched these, and wondered how real they are.”

  I slip into bed next to her and pull her close. “I’ve watched this one. It’s really outdated but it’s pretty real. It’s not like watching NCIS or Miami Vice. I assume the cases are real, but who knows.” We both lie quietly, watching the show and discussing how crazy the guy who murdered his wife is. It’s a comfortable and relaxing way to end our night.

  “Lexi, are you with me?” I hear voices around me, but can’t seem to open my eyes. Actually my limbs all feel heavy, too. Why can’t I move? Where the fuck am I?

  “Why isn’t she waking up yet?” Mom? That’s my mom’s voice, and she’s sounds tired and scared. Shit, this can’t be good.

  “It’s early, Mrs. Morgan, give her some time and she’ll come through.” I feel myself slipping back under, but not before she asks about my eyes twitching. “That’s normal. She’s probably dreaming about what actually happened to her. We see that often. It may be why she hasn’t woken yet, but we’ve stopped the medically-induced coma so it’s up to her now.” My mom sobs by my bed as I try to figure out what the hell happened to me. My brain is working overtime as bits and pieces start to come back to me.

  I jump up in my bed, sweating, trying to breathe, but there’s a tube down my throat. My eyes are searching the room, and that’s when I see my mom by my side pressing the button on my remote. A squad of doctors and nurses come running in. “Welcome back, Staff Sergeant Morgan. I need you to calm down so I can remove the tube in your throat.” I nod and lie back. He tells me to close my eyes and relax. As soon as I do he pulls the tube from my throat. Fuck, that hurt.

  “What happened? Where am I?” My voice is hoarse and sore, but I don’t care. I need to know what’s going on.

  “How much do you remember?” The doctor asks me.

  I close my eyes. “Mission gone bad, we took on gunfire.”

  “Good, that’s good,” the doctor tells me. “A mortar was launched at you and your team. Luckily for you they had bad aim. You were, however, thrown into the air. You had brain trauma, and some minor shrapnel fragments the surgeons had to remove before shipping you here.”

  “What about my team? Where the fuck is my team?” I’m panicking. I don’t remember leaving. He looks to the floor, but doesn’t say much, and I know this fucker is keeping something from me. “Tell me.” I’m angry and he knows it.

  “We lost two guys.” I turn to the door to see Pierce standing there with his arm in a sling.

  “Who?” My voice is soft, barely a whisper as I try to talk past the lump in my throat.

  He walks in and stands by my bed. He takes my hand. “I’m sorry, Morgan. I tried to save you all. I did, but I couldn’t save her.”

  “No.” I shake my head as tears stream down my face.

  “Bailey and Callahan are gone.”

  “No.” I heave as I try to control myself, but it’s not working. I heave again, and this time the doctor is there with a bucket. There isn’t much in me to vomit, but I empty what little I have.

  “Holy shit.” I sit up in bed dripping in sweat. It takes me a second to realize where I am. I look over to see concern etched on Keegan’s face. He witnessed my stupid nightmare ruining our nice night together. “I’m so sorry I woke you.”

  “You have no need to apologize.” He holds his arm up for me to snuggle into him and I do. I go willingly because I need him. I need him like I’ve never needed anyone. He’s the one constant in my life that understands what I’m going through. He spoons me from behind and lays quiet as he runs his fingers through my damp hair trying to settle me.

  “We were on a mission. It was supposed to be simple, but rarely did that hold true.” I lie still thinking back to that day and the bits I remember. “I don’t remember it all, but unfortunately, I remember enough. Our convoy was brought to a stop, and being in the rear we didn’t know why until we got word that a roadside bomb took out one of our trucks. We started taking on fire. We had no choice but to get out of our vehicles to help wounded.” Tears began to run down my cheeks. “The last thing I remember before waking up in a hospital was running for cover with Bailey as we heard a mortar coming at us.” I turn to face him. “I found out in the hospital I lost her. I was supposed to protect her and I lost her.” I close my eyes. “She was barely twenty-fucking-one. She hadn’t even fucking lived, and now she’s gone.”

  He runs his knuckles along my cheeks, wiping away the tears. “I know. As their leader you feel a certain responsibility over their safety, but you can’t blame yourself for this. You’re a medic, not a miracle worker, and you were injured at the same time. I can see why the doctor says you need closure, and I will be there to help you and make sure you get it.” He presses his lips to mine. It’s soft, it’s sweet, and it’s just what I need, for him to take away this pain I’m feeling, erase the horrible memories from that awful day, and he does, but not in the way I thought. He holds me and makes me feel safe until I fall back to sleep.

  Work has been ridiculously quiet this week. Julian put in some hours going through all the D.A.R.E stuff we had in the closet. It was such a mess and so disorganized he actually spent two evenings working on it, and since he worked so hard, I marked him off for a bunch of time. He’s a really good kid, it makes me glad I stepped up for him. Now we have all our stuff neatly stacked and organized on the shelves, and we can see what we need and what we don’t. The kid even went as far as putting a clipboard and a sheet of paper on the hook of the door and told me it was to mark down what we were getting low on so we could order more. I was very impressed and I told him so.

  Today we’re heading to the school for the family fair that Julian and I have been preparing for. I have the D.A.R.E car all loaded up and ready to go. I just need to pick up Julian and grab us a bite to eat. When I pull up to his house he’s already sitting on the front porch with his head down. He looks upset, and it bothers me. I roll down the window and call over to him. He’s moving a bit slow but I make no fuss over it, just a mental note to keep my eyes on him. “You all right, kid?”

  “Yeah. I didn’t sleep well, and then Mom freaked out this morning because I woke her up showering for the event.”

  I sigh. “I’m sorry, kid. Maybe shower at night while she’s out, then you won’t have to worry about it.” He nods his agreement and I take off toward the local donut shop to grab us breakfast on the way to the school.

  When we pull up to the school there’s a cop directing the traffic of the crafters and volunteers. He moves the barrier out of the way for me and waves me through. I roll down my window and thank him. He sticks out his hand and introduces himself to me as Officer Warren, we shake and I drive on through to where I need to park the D.A.R.E car so it will be seen. We both jump out and begin the process of setting up our table. There will be a few other officers joining us shortly to talk with the kids, but it’s my show, and that means I have to be the first one here.

  We have everything set up. Now we can sit and eat our breakfast while we wait for the other cops to show up.

  “Officer Ward, I want you to know I appreciate everything you’re doing for me, and I don’t just mean that you stepped up for me in court.” He swallows and takes a bite of the breakfast sandwich I bought him. “Whenever we’re together you take care of me. You make sure I have plenty to eat.” He swallows hard past the lump in his throat. I’m about to speak but he continues. “I know you don’t have to do any of that, shit my mom doesn’t.”

  “Listen, kid, I know what it’s like to be hungry, and to have a mother who doesn’t give a shit, that’s why I do it.” I put my sandwich down and turn to him. “I only ask one thing.”

  “What’s that?”

  “You pay it forward. Make something of yourself, be a good person, and when you get older and you have your shit together, look out for those less fortunate.” />
  He nods. “That’s a promise I can keep.”

  What a week it’s been. I got the call on Monday morning that I’ve been officially chosen for the ER nursing position at the hospital, and I couldn’t be more thrilled. I rushed right in to fill out all of my paperwork, take my picture for my badge and figure out my schedule for the week. I had to go in for a few hours every day for orientation, and a meeting with my new supervisor. I also was issued everything I need for my shifts at the hospital, like a pager, and the info for filling out my schedule. Next week I partner up with Harper for a seven to seven shift Monday, Thursday, and Saturday to learn the hospital's protocol, and then the following week I start on my own rotation. Between finding a job and meeting with Dr. Miranda, I’m feeling like a million bucks, and to make things even better today I get to spend the day with Keegan. Though he’ll be working, I’m still excited to see him in action and meet his new buddy Julian.

  I pull up to the school at ten-thirty. The event kicked off thirty minutes ago and it’s already getting busy. I park my car way down the street and walk back up to the school. The event is free to get into, but there are women at the gate selling tickets that go to the Chinese auction and the games. There are rows and rows of craft tables set up, and as I scan the crowd I finally see him. A huge grin lights up my face as I quickly pay the lady and walk away with my tickets in hand. “Hey, pretty lady.”

  “Hey yourself. I love seeing you in your uniform.”

  He chuckles. “I think I can tell from the expression on your face.” I slap him playfully.

  “Julian, come here.” He comes running over. “Julian, this is my girlfriend, Lexi. Lexi, this is Julian.”

  Julian holds out his hand. “It’s nice to meet you, ma’am.”

  She laughs. “Oh, you sweet boy. I am far too young to be a ma’am. You can call me Lexi.”