Faithless: A Salvation Society Novel

by Megan Green

  Without a second thought, I sprint up the stairs, pushing past Aarabelle and pulling my daughter into my arms. “It’s okay, Gracie. You’re okay,” I say, smoothing her hair with one hand as I press my lips to her temple.

  “Who’s Kate?” she asks, concern and confusion infiltrating her tone. And I could kill my sister for saying that name where my daughter could hear it.

  “It’s nobody, sweetie. Nobody you need to worry about.”

  “Auntie Aara said she was Mommy’s sister.”

  I cut my eyes to Aarabelle over my shoulder, and judging by the way she cowers away from my stare, I guess the old adage is true. If looks could kill, she’d be dead.

  “Why don’t we get you to bed?” I say, trying to lift her into my arms. I’m not a small man by any means—years of military work will do that to you—but my six-year-old daughter is much stronger than she looks. She struggles against me, pushing me away before I can get a good hold on her, rushing down the stairs and wrapping her arms around my sister’s legs.

  “Do you know Mommy’s sister, Auntie Aara?”

  Aara’s eyes flash to me, as if asking what she should do.

  Too bad she didn’t ask that before coming in here and fucking up my world even further.

  Now that Gracie knows about her mother’s sister, she’s never going to drop the issue. Not until she gets some answers. She may only be six, but she’s a tenacious little thing.

  Just like her namesake.

  I give Aara a brief nod, silently permitting her to explain the situation to Gracie. She kneels down on the stairs, lowering herself to Gracie’s height and taking both of her hands in hers.

  “I do. And she’s really excited to meet you. But not tonight, okay? Why don’t you go get ready for bed, and then me and your dad will come tuck you in? Then tomorrow, I’ll tell you all about your Aunt Kate, okay?”

  Gracie looks at me over her shoulder, and for a moment I think she’s going to argue. But she simply nods, giving Aara a kiss on the cheek and turning to run back up the stairs. She rushes right past me, and I hear the faucet turn on in the bathroom as she begins to brush her teeth.

  “I’m sorry, Shane. I didn’t mean for her to overhear that,” Aara says, at least having the audacity to look apologetic. “I never wanted to take this decision away from you.”

  “Yeah, well, it’s a little late for that, don’t you think?” I bite out.

  She shrinks back at the harshness of my tone, and regret rushes through me. I know she means well, but… fuck.

  I listen as Gracie finishes in the bathroom and her little feet pad down the hallway to her room. I lift my chin toward the still-open front door.

  “Go get her. If she’s going to be meeting my daughters tomorrow, I need to make sure she’s not going to say anything to hurt them.”

  “Thank you, Shane. I know you won’t regret this,” Aara says, backing her way down the stairs.

  I shake my head.

  “I already do.”

  Chapter Six

  Kate

  “Are you sure I look okay?” I ask for the tenth time, my hands smoothing down the fabric of my blazer.

  Aarabelle shoots me an amused look. “Damn, girl. You’d think you’re meeting the freaking Queen of England instead of a couple of kids. Trust me, Gracie and Ellie aren’t going to care what you’re wearing. They’re just excited to meet you.”

  Not nearly as excited as I am to meet them, I think, even as the nerves roll through my stomach. Truth is, I’m ecstatic to finally meet my nieces. I barely slept a wink last night from the anticipation of this afternoon.

  Seeing their father again, however…

  Yeah, let’s file that under shit that makes waterboarding sound like fun.

  Last night had been a whirlwind of emotions. I’d gone from heartbroken and planning to skip town as soon as I could to apprehensive and sitting on my dead sister’s sofa, her bereaved husband glaring daggers at me from across the room.

  I hadn’t expected I’d be able to meet Gracie and Ellie last night. After Aara had convinced me to come with her and we made our way down to her car, I’d realized just how late it was. It didn’t exactly seem like a great first impression—okay, technically second, but I wasn’t going to count the few seconds I’d interacted with Shane Dempsey at the funeral as anything other than a big misunderstanding—to show up at his house at what had to be nearing bedtime.

  But Aara had insisted that we needed to do it last night. She’d also insisted I call her Aara instead of Aarabelle, a fact that had both surprised and delighted me. It felt good to have someone who seemed to be on my side of the whole Felicity debacle. Lord knows it’s been ages since anybody who knew us both actually chose me.

  I’d drawn the line at accompanying her to the door, however. She may have thought she could talk Shane Dempsey down from any ledge my arrival might put him on, but I wasn’t about to disrespect somebody who might not want me in their home. So I’d convinced her to let me stay in the car while she explained my presence. And if she could talk him into it, then I’d make my appearance.

  Her initial chat with Shane had gone surprisingly fast. I’d expected to be waiting out in the car for at least an hour, but not even ten minutes after she’d disappeared inside, Aara had poked her head out the door and gestured me inside.

  “He wants to talk to you,” she said as I approached the door, my heart thundering in my chest. I reached an unsteady hand out and placed it on the doorjamb, using it as leverage to lean in and peer around the living room. Now that I was there, I wasn’t entirely certain I could go through with it.

  “Don’t worry. The girls are in bed. You won’t be meeting them tonight,” she explained, obviously picking up on my apprehension. “Shane just wants to, umm… get to know you a little first.”

  I gulped down a breath of air, those words sounding even more ominous than the idea of meeting Felicity’s children.

  Sure enough, Shane Dempsey had proved to be every bit as intimidating as I’d expected. With his broad shoulders, muscled arms, and massive thighs, there was nothing small or slight about the man. Add in the air of authority he carried with him wherever he went, and yeah. You could say he was a bit terrifying. I briefly remembered reading something on Felicity’s Instagram about him being in the military at some point. It definitely explained his commanding presence.

  He’d stalked down the stairs, taken one look at me on the sofa, and chosen to sit as far away as humanly possible. He’d responded in only grunts and groans at everything Aara had said, his hard gaze boring into me as she explained how she’d found me sobbing on a hotel room floor.

  At the end of Aara’s speech, his eyes had flicked between the two of us before fixing themselves on me. With his jaw set in a tight line, he’d finally spoken.

  “Let me make this clear. I don’t like you. I don’t trust you. If I had things my way, you never would’ve set foot in that funeral home and you sure as hell wouldn’t be sitting here in my living room. But my sister had other ideas, and because of her, my daughter now knows you exist. With everything else she’s going through… I just can’t break her heart and tell her she won’t be able to meet you. But you will do this on my terms. You will tell them about their mother when she was a girl. You will tell them about the good times. And under no circumstances, will you even think about bad-mouthing their mother. If one negative word about Felicity passes your lips, I have no problem with picking your tiny ass up and throwing it out of my house. Got it?”

  My mouth had gaped when he finished, his gruff voice reverberating down through my chest and festering in the pit of my stomach. Did he really think so little of me? Did he honestly think I would try to use this opportunity to turn my late sister’s children against her?

  But, of course he did. Because the only knowledge the man had of me was formed by my sister’s opinions and stories. Of course he thought I was the devil incarnate. Felicity had believed that down to her very core.

  In the en
d, I’d simply nodded, a meek “Yes, sir,” slipping past my lips before Aara had pulled me to my feet and told Shane we’d be back today at four.

  Pizza and board games. That was how I was going to officially meet my nieces. Over a slice of pepperoni and a visit to the Licorice Lagoon.

  And now, standing here on their front porch, my palms damp with sweat and my knees wobbly as I try to adjust myself for the hundredth time, I can’t help the fear I feel.

  Not at meeting the only ties I have left to my sister, but at how I’m going to convince my brother-in-law that I’m not only a better person than Felicity made me out to be, but that his girls would actually benefit from having me in their lives.

  Let’s just take this one step at a time, ‘mkay Kate? Let’s worry about getting through this initial meeting without pissing anybody off before we start making plans about the future.

  Aara places a gentle hand on my shoulder. “Don’t worry about it, Kate. You’re going to be great.”

  I blow out a shaky breath and nod. “Okay. I’m ready.”

  Aara raps on the door, and I hear a squeal and the clamor of what sounds like a dozen wild animals barreling toward us.

  The door flies open, and all the air in my lungs disappears as I stare down at the two little girls standing before me.

  I’d been struck by their resemblance to Felicity from afar. But up close, only a few feet away…

  It’s all I can do to keep my feet beneath me, my head suddenly swimming and my lungs burning as I struggle to pull in my next breath.

  Four little eyes stare up at me. Four eyes that look so much like Felicity’s… like my own. Two tiny heads of dark hair, pin-straight and smooth as silk, not unlike the strands currently tucked into a low bun at the nape of my neck.

  The similarities are astounding. But when the older one—Gracie, I believe—opens her mouth and speaks, I’m transported back twenty years.

  “Are you my aunt Kate?” her little voice chimes, the tone, quality—hell, even the breathy pauses between words—all Felicity.

  I drop down to my knees, not giving a damn about the dirt that’s likely collecting on my dress pants, and reach out a hand. I stop myself before I can touch her though, not wanting to overstep before I’ve even gotten a chance to really proceed.

  Instead, I drop my arm back to my side and give her a warm smile. “Yes. I’m Kate. And you must be Gracie, right?”

  She nods twice before grabbing her sister’s hand. “This is Ellie.”

  I turn to face the younger girl. “Hi, Ellie. It’s so nice to meet you.”

  Ellie slinks behind her sister, her cheeks flushing crimson as she peers out around her.

  “She’s shy,” Gracie explains, clearly used to being the voice for her baby sister.

  I smile at them both, once again marveling at how much they remind me of Felicity and myself. Felicity had always been my protector growing up. Always there to lend me her confidence whenever my own faltered. I can see the same is true of Gracie and Ellie, their relationship evident even from this brief interaction.

  I can only hope their closeness holds a better fate than ours did.

  Aara’s voice pulls me from my thoughts.

  “Where’s your daddy, girls?”

  Climbing to my feet, I follow as Gracie and Ellie step back and allow Aara to enter. The living room looks exactly the same as it did the night before, but somehow, feels even more unwelcoming.

  The man sitting in the armchair in the corner, his body coiled tight, as if ready to spring into action at a moment’s notice, probably has something to do with that. Instead of the black sweatpants and plain white t-shirt he’d been wearing before, he’s dressed in dark jeans and a black Henley. Combined with his dark coloring and massive size, he definitely paints a picture of pure masculinity and power. Something tells me it’s not just a picture though. Shane Dempsey could kick some major ass.

  Let’s just hope it’s not mine.

  His throat bobs as he assesses me, his face not giving even a hint as to his thoughts. Finally, he speaks.

  “You got a meeting after this or something?”

  I glance down at my attire, suddenly rethinking the business casual look I’d selected this morning. I’d wanted to appear professional, like someone he could trust.

  It hadn’t occurred to me how ridiculous it would look showing up to play Candyland in a suit.

  Clearing my throat, I unbutton my jacket and slide it from my shoulders. “No, I just, um…”

  “She’s nervous, Shane. Give her a break.” Aara comes to my rescue, cutting a glare at Shane that I’m pretty sure only she could get away with.

  I wonder if Felicity had spoken to him like that. If they had an easy, carefree relationship like Shane seems to have with his sister. Or were things strained? Was he as intimidating in an intimate setting as he is right now?

  It kills me that I’ll never know the answer to that. That I never once, not in the ten years of their marriage, had a chance to see them interact. That I never got to see if my sister was truly happy with the life she’d made.

  Shane scoffs at Aara, a subtle roll of his eyes telling me exactly what he thinks about my nerves.

  But then Gracie interrupts the tense silence, her hand closing around mine as she pulls me toward the couch.

  “Come sit down, Aunt Kate. Come tell us about Mommy.”

  I follow her willingly, settling myself down beside her even as I feel Shane’s eyes on me. He’s watching my every movement, and I can practically feel the discontent rolling off him in waves.

  Ellie surprises me by climbing up on my other side. She doesn’t scoot as close to me as Gracie does, but it still feels like progress.

  “What do you want to know?” I ask, not sure where to start.

  “How come Mommy never told us she had a sister?” Gracie blurts out.

  I wince, my eyes flicking to Shane for guidance. He just gives me a subtle shake of his head, his jaw still clenched tight. The warning is clear.

  Not a negative word about Felicity.

  “Well, sweetie,” I start, my mind whirling as I try to come up with a child-friendly explanation for mine and Felicity’s relationship. “Sometimes sisters fight. And when that happens, sometimes that means they don’t talk to each other for a very long time.”

  “Like a month?” Gracie asks, the shock in her voice making it obvious this is the longest amount of time she can think of.

  “Yeah. Sometimes even more than a month.”

  Her little face scrunches up as she ponders my words. “But what did you fight about?”

  I purse my lips. “You know what, it’s been so long, I can’t even remember,” I say. And I realize it’s not entirely untrue. I never did understand the details of why Felicity started hating me. How it was so easy for her to turn her back on me.

  Gracie’s lips pull down into a frown, her eyes sad as she looks up at me. “Mommy always makes sure me and Ellie make up before we go to bed whenever we fight. She says it’s not good to go to bed angry.”

  “Your mom was right. It’ll give you bad dreams.”

  She nods. “That’s what she always said. Do you have bad dreams ‘cause you were mad at Mommy?”

  How is it that kids always seem to ask the simplest of questions that are the hardest to answer?

  Instead of looking at Shane and seeing his hard eyes, I turn to Aara. She gives me an encouraging smile.

  “Sometimes,” I answer her honestly. “Mostly, I just missed your mom.”

  Gracie seems satisfied with this answer, dropping the subject of nightmares and simply saying, “I wish you could’ve made up before she died,” before placing her hand on mine.

  I ignore Shane’s sharp intake of air at his daughter’s contact, turning my hand over and linking my fingers with hers.

  “Me, too, sweetie. Me, too.”

  I spend the next two hours telling Gracie, Ellie, and Aara all about Felicity and me growing up. From the hours we spent in pillow fo
rts, to the entire afternoons we’d spend exploring the neighborhoods on our bikes—I recount as many happy memories as I can remember, each of them hanging on my every word, asking details about Felicity that only I can provide.

  It feels good to talk about her like this. To remember the way things used to be, when times were better. Felicity had been the best friend I’d ever had—even to this day. I’d never been able to find someone to replace the connection we’d once shared.

  By the time the pizza arrives—Aara apparently ordered from an app on her phone during one of my many stories—Gracie is snuggled up to my side, her head on my shoulder as her legs drape over mine. And Ellie is on my lap, her arms wrapped around my neck as she stares up at me.

  I’m hot and uncomfortable and… and completely in love.

  My heart has never felt so full, my chest nearly bursting with the amount of love pouring into it with every look, every smile, every word from these girls.

  Aarabelle tips the delivery driver, kicking the door closed with her foot as she turns to face us. “Come on, girls. Let’s go set the table.”

  “Pizza!” Gracie shouts, throwing herself off the sofa and dashing toward the kitchen. Ellie follows after her, her arms up in the air as she cheers. I’m not sure she even knows what they’re cheering for, her little mind just wanting to be like her sister.

  It’s not until they’re gone that I realize they’ve left me alone with Shane.

  I clear my throat, pushing to my feet and nervously fidgeting with the hem of my shirt. “I should go help them.”

  My foot has barely left the floor when his voice stops me dead in my tracks.

  “You’re nothing like I was expecting, Kate Mitchell.”

  I turn to face him, hoping that by looking at him, I might be able to infer just what in the hell that’s supposed to mean. But just as before, his face is a mask of steely intensity.

  “Is that a good thing or a bad thing?” I ask when I realize he’s not going to continue.

  He shrugs a shoulder. “Jury’s still out on that one.”