Eternally Yours

by Brenda Jackson

  Marilyn Madaris shook her head and smiled. “No, he hasn’t.”

  “Where’s Lorren?” Caitlin asked as she began peeling the shells off the boiled eggs.

  “She’s in the den with the kids, reading them a story. Bless her heart. How she can put up with all of them in her condition is beyond me,” Kattie answered. “She has so much patience.”

  The conversation in the kitchen shifted from Clayton to other topics as the women continued working diligently on tomorrow’s dinner.

  “Are you all right, Syneda?” Caitlin asked a little while later when the two of them were left alone in the kitchen. “You’ve been rather quiet today.”

  Syneda liked Caitlin. She was a very likable person who was just as beautiful on the inside as she was on the outside. She and Dex had married within two weeks of their meeting. What followed not too long after that was a long and bitter separation that had lasted for nearly four years. Love had reunited them, and when you saw them together, you would never have guessed the problems their marriage had endured. Problems that Caitlin was quick to admit had made their love and marriage stronger.

  “I’m fine,” Syneda replied, giving Caitlin an assuring smile.

  At that moment the kitchen door swung open and Clayton walked in. A frown covered his features. “Where’s Mom?”

  “She’s upstairs trying to find a place for all the kids to sleep. Your dad wants all his grands under his roof tonight,” Caitlin replied, eyeing her brother-in-law warily. His handsome face had become brooding and a scowl clouded his features. Her sisters-in-law had been right. He was in a rather bad mood.

  “I think I’ll go upstairs and offer my assistance. Do you want to come with me, Syneda?” Caitlin asked.

  Syneda shook her head as her gaze met Clayton’s. “I’ll be up later. I would like to talk to Clayton for a while.”

  In his present mood, Caitlin wasn’t sure that was such a good idea but kept her thoughts to herself. “Okay. I’ll see you guys later.”

  When the door closed behind her, Clayton walked forward, stopping in front of Syneda. He looked down at her intensely. “What do you want to talk to me about?”

  Taking a deep, unsteady breath, Syneda stepped back. His towering height seemed intimidating. “Let’s step outside.”

  “No.”

  “No?”

  “That’s what I said. Why can’t you say what you have to say right here? Are you afraid we’ll make a scene and the family will find out about us?”

  She frowned. “That’s not it at all. I thought—”

  “And what did you think, Syneda?”

  “I thought that maybe we could go someplace where we could be alone.”

  Clayton stared at her. She had a lot of nerve trying to offer him a chance to put things back the way they used to be between them. She was still only interested in an affair with no commitment or complications. Didn’t she understand that he could have what she was offering with a number of other women? Didn’t she know that with her he wanted more? Had she not gotten it through her head that he loved her with such a passion that even now his hands were trembling from just being near her, wanting to touch her, to love her and to keep her with him always? Just looking at her brought back memories he could very well do without.

  “You’re the last woman I want to be alone with, Syneda.” He turned to leave.

  His words hurt Syneda, but she was determined that he would hear her out. Moving quickly she blocked his exit. “You’re going to listen to what I have to say, Madaris.”

  “Don’t count on it. Now move your butt out of my way.”

  “No.”

  The stark coldness in his eyes made her shiver from the chill cast in the room, but Syneda didn’t care. As far as she was concerned she was just as mad as he was. He could be so stubborn at times.

  “You make me so mad, Madaris, I could just smack you.”

  “I wouldn’t advise you to act crazy and do it,” he said threateningly, glaring down at her.

  “Act crazy? You mean like this?” she asked angrily before smacking him.

  The swiftness of Syneda’s action caught Clayton completely off guard. Enraged, he grabbed her hand and yanked her to him and glared down at her. Then all of a sudden he was kissing her, his mouth hard on hers, his tongue thrusting into her warm moistness, probing and caressing.

  He had wanted to be brutal in his kiss, to punish her for hurting him. But he found he couldn’t. Especially when he felt her response. So he continued to kiss her, letting all his needs and frustrations take over.

  Soon an inner part of him told him this was not the way. He loved her too much to take less than a full commitment, less than her total love. Feeling disgusted with himself for his lack of control where she was concerned, he shoved her away from him and spun around and walked in the opposite direction.

  “Clayton, please wait and listen to me.”

  He stopped walking and turned back around. The look in his eyes told her he had been pushed beyond his limit. “No, Syneda, you listen to me. You’re here but that doesn’t mean I have to like it. Just do me a favor and stay the hell away from me. You wanted my family so bad, well, you can have them, but that doesn’t include me. All I want is for you to leave me alone.” He turned and walked out of the kitchen.

  Shaken by his angry words, Syneda sat down in the nearest chair. Clayton no longer wanted her. She had been so sure that once she saw him again and they had a chance to talk, and she told him how much she loved him, things would be all right between them. She hadn’t expected his anger, and she never expected him to not want anything to do with her. He actually acted as if he hated her. She must have hurt him deeply for him to feel the way he now felt toward her.

  Her shoulders drooped. There was no way she could stay here with his family knowing how he felt. Making a decision to find an excuse to leave first thing in the morning, she walked through the same door Clayton had walked through just moments earlier, almost colliding with Mrs. Madaris.

  “We didn’t mean to desert you, dear.”

  “You didn’t. In fact, I was just about to find you. Something has come up and I’m going to have to return to New York first thing in the morning.”

  Syneda found herself under the warm charcoal-gray gaze of the woman, who gave her an endearing smile. “I’m sorry to hear that. I really enjoy you being here with us.”

  Marilyn Madaris’s eyes were lit from some inner glow. “I’ve been in this kitchen since six this morning, and I think I’m more than due a break. I’ve started taking afternoon walks around the neighborhood. Would you like to join me?”

  Syneda nodded. She always enjoyed Clayton’s mother’s company. Besides, her conversation with Clayton had taken a toll on her.

  The two women walked outside the house. The treetops stirred with the whisper of a cool breeze. They were ten minutes into their walk before either woman spoke. Then it was Clayton’s mom who broke their silence. “Have I ever told you how Jonathan and I met?”

  The question surprised Syneda. “No, I don’t think you have.”

  The older woman smiled. “I was fresh out of college and had landed my first teaching job. It seemed good fortune was on my side because the elementary school I was assigned to was within a block of my apartment. I was grateful for that because money was tight, and I couldn’t really afford a car payment.”

  They continued walking. “My first day on the job I came face-to-face with the principal. He was a stern but very tall, dark, handsome man by the name of Jonathan Madaris. I think we were attracted to each other immediately, although I tried my best to fight it. I had my own set of plans for my future, and they didn’t include getting serious about anyone for a long while.”

  Her laughter mixed with the sustained whine of an ambulance siren in the distance. “Lucky for me, the school board had a policy that stated school administrators could not date their teaching personnel. However, Jonathan Madaris had made up his mind that he wanted me, and would not
let some school administration policy stop him.”

  Syneda’s interest was piqued. “What did he do?”

  “Without me knowing what he was about, and after I had worked only a few weeks at his school, he had me transferred elsewhere. I was assigned to another school that was out of his district and over fifty miles from my home. I was furious. Not once did he consider the fact that such a move would be an inconvenience, as well as a hardship for me. He was only thinking of himself. He had only one goal in mind and that was to have me, one way or another.”

  “And what did you do?”

  “I rebelled and fought him every step of the way. But he didn’t give up on me until I did something that’s almost unforgivable to a Madaris man.”

  “What?”

  “I injured his pride.”

  Syneda raised a brow. “How?”

  “I filed a complaint against him with the district school superintendent. It was somewhat similar to a modern-day sexual harassment complaint. Fortunately, although I didn’t know it at the time, the school superintendent was a good friend of Jonathan’s. He called him in and told him what I’d done. By that time, I had cooled off and had regretted my actions and withdrew the complaint. But Jonathan was very upset with me. It took him a while to come around.”

  Marilyn Madaris stopped walking and Syneda also ceased her steps. She found herself caught under the older woman’s soft gaze that seemed to probe deep within her soul. “My sons, especially Dex and Clayton, with Dex being the worse, are no different from their father when it comes to the issue of the Madaris pride. They can be stubborn men, but when they fall in love, it’s forever, and nothing, not even Madaris pride, can destroy that. It just takes a very strong woman to work around it.”

  Syneda’s eyes widened suspiciously. “Why are you telling me this, Mrs. Madaris?”

  “Because I thought you should know.”

  Syneda nodded. “All right,” she replied with sudden calm. “And I only think it’s fair that you know that I’m in love with Clayton, and that we’ve been seeing each other secretly for almost six months. But you knew that, didn’t you?”

  Marilyn Madaris wore an open, friendly smile. “I had my suspicions, but I wasn’t absolutely sure until that night at Whispering Pines when I saw the two of you dancing together. I knew then.”

  Syneda was operating on pure amazement as she took a much-needed deep breath. “You picked up on it just by seeing us dance together? But we’ve danced together a lot of other times.”

  Marilyn Madaris’s eyes lifted. A smile touched her lips. “But never like that. It was somehow different the way he was holding you, the way you were holding him, the way the two of you kept looking at each other. It was like the two of you were the only two people at that party.”

  She laughed. “I may be getting old but these eyes of mine don’t miss too much, especially when it concerns my children.” She smiled again. “However, I don’t understand why you and Clayton wanted to keep it a secret.”

  A lump formed in Syneda’s throat and she moved her shoulders under Mrs. Madaris’s concentrated gaze. “I asked him to. I didn’t want the family to know that we had been seeing each other.”

  “Why?”

  Syneda took a deep breath. She silently admitted she was relieved to bring everything out in the open. “I was concerned about what you and the rest of the family would think of me getting involved with him.”

  “We would think what we’ve always known—you’re a levelheaded young lady and a special person. Clayton’s falling in love with you makes you that much more special. For so long, his father and I were concerned that he would never find someone special to settle down with. I see that he has, and I’m glad it’s you.”

  Syneda stared at the older woman. “We’re having problems.”

  “Somehow I picked up on that, but I’m sure the two of you will work things out.”

  “And you don’t mind that Clayton and I are having an affair?”

  “An affair?” Marilyn Madaris’s face broke into a wide grin. “Since Clayton is his father’s son, I have every reason to believe something permanent is forthcoming. That’s another thing about Madaris men,” she continued, “once they find the woman they love, they need commitment. They believe when people just live together, it’s too easy to walk away and call it quits. Forever to them means just that. Forever.”

  She eyed the young woman standing before her. “What I don’t understand is why Clayton is upset?”

  Syneda blushed although the thought of confiding in Mrs.

  Madaris didn’t bother her. She had long ago learned that the woman was very understanding. As they strolled back toward the house, Syneda told her everything, including the fact that Clayton was upset with her because she was staying with them instead of at his apartment.

  Marilyn Madaris said very little as she listened to Syneda tell her about her mother’s death, and about the father who had rejected her and the resulting childhood insecurities that had followed her through adulthood, and how she had let it come between her and Clayton.

  Talking about it with the older woman made Syneda realize what Clayton had said all along was true. You can’t let the past dictate the future. Before long the two women were back at the Madaris family home.

  Before entering the door Syneda turned to the older woman. “Thanks, Mrs. Madaris, for listening.”

  “You don’t have to thank me. I enjoyed our talk, and I know you’re just the woman for my son. I’ve known that since the first time I saw you and Clayton together and you were giving him hell about something the two of you had disagreed on.”

  An approving smile touched her lips. “I think Clayton is a very lucky man.”

  Syneda’s entire face spread into a smile with her comment. “I think so, too, but only because he has you for a mother.”

  The two women embraced before entering the kitchen where they found Dex sitting at the table reading the paper.

  “Where is everyone?” his mother asked. The house was unusually quiet.

  “Caitlin is upstairs taking a nap, and Jordan talked her uncle Justin and her grampa into pizza. They thought it would be nice if they took everyone out for pizza instead of having it delivered here. I think they were trying to give you a break from all the noise.”

  Marilyn Madaris laughed. “Pizza on Thanksgiving Eve? They better have room for turkey tomorrow. Did Clayton go with them?”

  “No, he’s left and said he won’t be back until tomorrow. Why?”

  “I hate to inconvenience him, but Syneda is staying over at his place tonight.”

  Ignoring the shocked and surprised look on Syneda’s face, as well as that of her second-born son, Marilyn Madaris continued, “That way we can have plenty of room for the kids to sleep comfortably since your father insists they all spend the night.”

  She then turned to Syneda. “Go gather your things, dear. You may use my car,” she said, placing her car keys in Syneda’s hand. “I expect both you and Clayton here in the morning no later than eleven. Understood?”

  Syneda nodded before rushing from the kitchen and up the stairs to grab her things.

  Dex stood, his expression wary. He didn’t know how much he could or should tell his mother about Clayton and Syneda’s relationship. “I don’t think that was such a good idea, Mom, to send Syneda over to Clayton’s for the night. Caitlin and I have plenty of room at our place. She could have stayed with us.”

  He hesitated briefly before continuing. “You’ve probably been too busy to notice Clayton’s mood today. It’s been the pits. And I really don’t think you want to subject Syneda to that. You know how disagreeable they are most of the time, anyway. And with Clayton’s present mood, one little spark could cause a big explosion. Being together is the last thing they need tonight.”

  A smile touched his mother’s lips. “Perhaps. And perhaps not.”

  Less than an hour later Syneda stood in front of the door to Clayton’s apartment. She had come pre
pared for anything but his rejection. She would not settle for that. Taking a deep breath, she rang the doorbell.

  A somewhat tired and angry-looking Clayton opened the door. He lifted his brow in surprise. “What are you doing here? I thought I made it clear that I wanted to be left alone.” There was a sharp edge to his voice.

  Syneda swallowed nervously, but she refused to back down. “I need to talk to you, Clayton. Please.”

  Clayton hesitated a moment before moving aside. Syneda stepped inside his living room and turned to face him. The look on his face was inscrutable, and he was so distant that a knot of uncertainty coiled within her. However, she refused to give in to her anxiety. She was determined to accomplish what she came to do.

  “I came to return something to you, Clayton.”

  Clayton shut the door and leaned back against it. His hand remained on the knob as if he needed support. “What? I thought you sent back everything.”

  “Everything but this,” Syneda said. She opened the coat she was wearing.

  Clayton’s full attention was drawn to Syneda’s outfit when she completely removed her coat and dropped it to the floor. His white dress shirt was the only thing she was wearing. His breath caught in his throat when she began unbuttoning the shirt.

  “What do you think you’re doing?” His voice was harsh with no vestige of softness.

  Syneda stopped and met his gaze. The eyes staring back at her were cold, remote and distant. “I had a long talk with your mom this evening, Clayton, after you left,” she admitted quietly.

  He stepped from the door and came to stand before her. She could tell he was seething with mounting rage. “So?”

  “And she knows about us. I told her everything.”

  Clayton’s mouth hardened. “And just what do you expect from me for doing that? Some sort of medal for bravery?”

  His words infuriated her, and anger flared in Syneda’s eyes. She lifted her chin. “I thought you would be pleased about it. Evidently, you’re not. Coming here was a mistake.” She snatched her coat from the floor and walked past him. She had just opened the door when Clayton’s arm shot in front of her and slammed it back shut.