by Shan
"There my baby go," Brandon slurred yelling down the hall. He was sipping on another beer.
"Oh my God he's gonna get me killed," I said through gritted teeth.
"Just be cool,” Starr said just as Tamar approached us.
"You a’ight?" Tamar asked.
I nodded my head and tried not to make eye contact with Brandon who was standing right behind Tamar.
"That sure is a lil’ ass dress somebody can just reach under there and snatch your panties off," Brandon laughed. "Damn, Tae you need to stop letting this hoe wonder off before somebody get tempted to give her some dick!"
I closed my eyes knowing shit was about to get ugly; Tamar was either about to slap the shit outta of me or either Brandon. Tamar's jaws were clenching so I knew he was mad and trying his best to bite his tongue.
Brandon laughed, "Why everybody looking at me crazy? I'm just telling the truth; the bitch do got on a lil’ ass dress."
That did it right there, Tamar turned around so fast, popping Brandon in the face that it was nothing nobody could do to stop it. He staggered backwards into the wall and was about to charge at Tamar but Taron jumped in between them.
"Nah let me go! That bitch ass nigga wanna sneak me!" Brandon was trying his best to get through Taron but couldn't, hell he was so fucked up he could barely stand.
"Let his ass go! That nigga wanna go toe to toe, let him go!" Tamar yelled.
"Nah you need to chill out just take Roz and go back to your room!" Taron yelled pushing Tamar back. I grabbed Tamar's hand trying to pull him towards our room but he wouldn't budge.
"Yea take your ass back in there with that ratchet ass hoe, she done ran through your whole damn family! Nigga you can't turn a hoe into a housewife; I betcha I still fuck after it's all said and done!"
Brandon just added fuel to the fire that was already burning inside of Tamar. As hard as Taron tried to keep them apart he couldn't; Tamar was too mad and too strong.
"Key help me!" Taron yelled.
"He asking for it; let him get what he want!” Keylan said leaning against the wall.
WHAM! WHAP!
Tamar's fist connected with Brandon's face once more, followed up with a blow to the gut. Brandon did his best but the liquor wasn't helping any, every punch he threw that actually landed didn't seem to faze Tamar at all. He was making sure Brandon felt every bit of his pain. Once I saw that the fight was about to be broken up; I grabbed Brian's hand and pulled him away. I ran so fast to his and Starr's room knowing that I was next to feel Tamar's wrath. I should've told him the truth the day he asked. "Shit!"
"Starr close the door, close the door!" I screamed.
"Why we running?" Starr asked after slamming the door shut.
"Bitch, where have you been? You know his ass is coming for little Miss Hot Ass next," Brian sat on the bed and crossed his legs like the diva he was. He flipped his dreads out of his face and stared at me with a devious smile.
"Brian don't start. Just leave it alone."
"Miss Thang, I was just thinking I should have had my phone out so I could've put that shit on YouTube!" Brian burst into laughter followed by a high five and laughter from Starr.
"Okay, ‘cause B know he got his ass whooped. That nigga gonna wake up with a hangover and a big ass knot on his head," Starr grabbed a blunt from the table and fired it up. "See, I told you he was gonna start singing like a bitch. I told you to tell Tamar a long time ago."
"I told her the same thing, you know she don't listen to us," Brian got up and snatched the blunt from Starr and took a long puff from it and held onto the smoke.
"Damn." he said
BAM! BAM! BAM!
"Rozalyn, open the damn door!" Tamar yelled.
Brian held out the blunt towards me and fell to the floor choking on the kush; being overly dramatic as usual.
"Bitch, he gonna kick that door down!" Brian said hitting himself on the chest.
BAM! BAM!
"Open the door before I kick it down!" Tamar roared.
Starr and Brian both stared at me, I took a toke off the blunt and blew out the smoke. I passed it back to Starr and brought my knees up to my chest then quickly dropped them down remembering I didn't have on any panties. This was entirely my fault; I should've never called Brandon. I was supposed to be mad at Tamar, he was supposed to beg me to marry him, and forgive him for not telling me he had a baby on the way. This was not supposed to be happening.
"Okay, why is it so quiet?" Starr asked.
"I know he didn't give up that easily," Brian said.
"Ya'll he's gonna kill me," I shuttered.
"Yep," Brian came over to me and hugged me. "It's been real friend, I love you. Least this time I get to say bye."
Brian and Starr laughed.
"Ya'll stop playing so much, damn!"
"Ok..ok..."
We all turned our heads towards the door, the sound of the door beeped signifying that someone had been granted access into the room. We stared horrified when the door came open and Tamar walked in, his shirt was ripped and he had dried up blood on his hands.
"Tae, wait a minute. Ya'll need to just talk when you ain't mad!" Starr said standing in front of me.
"Starr you can get it too; move your little ass out the way!" Tamar yelled.
"I'm just saying don't be putting your hands on her blood! You know I don't buck down to nan nigga, you not about to put your hands on her!"
Tamar laughed, "Yo Key come get this lil’ rabbit ass girl before I knock her out!"
Starr folded her arms across her chest and stood her ground, she was a feisty lil’ something not much bigger than me but I have seen her throw down with the best of them. Keylan came into the room and grabbed Starr by her arm; she countered back and punched him in the face. While the two of them were struggling with each other Tamar snatched me off the bed like I was a piece of paper.
"Tae, put me down!" I screamed. I was kicking and scratching, my dress had lifted showing all my goodies but I didn't care. I would rather go through the minor embarrassment rather than whatever Tae had in store for me.
"You better stop scratching me....get your ass in here!" Tamar tossed me to the floor inside our hotel room and slammed the door shut behind him.
"It's not what you think! Let me explain please!" I backed away from Tamar exposing my bare pussy.
"Oh it's not! So I guess you left outta here with no panties on then!" He said coming towards me. "I asked you a thousand times if you fucked him, gave you opportunity after opportunity to tell me the truth!"
"I was scared to tell you the truth, it was a mistake!"
"A mistake? Letting my boy climb between your legs ain't no fuckin’ mistake! How long it's been going on Rozalyn?"
"It's not like that....it only happened twice.....but I swear it will never happen again!" I got up from the floor and stood on the other side of the table trying to keep a safe distance between Tamar and myself.
"I can't believe you would do me like this Roz, outta any nigga you can fuck you get down with my supposed to be right hand man! What the fuck?"
"Tae....I'm sorry! I was stupid and he had me thinking I owed him for helping me and Zavier out when you were in the hospital. I kept telling him that I was gonna pay him back but he kept making me feel like I owed him......Tae I was confused and mad about Shalea and me being pregnant...."
Tamar picked the table up and tossed it to the side; he brought his hand up and slammed it against my face. I fell to the floor and tried to get up and make a run for it but he grabbed me by hair, it felt like he was trying to detach my roots from my scalp.
"You fucked him while you were pregnant with my child! I wanna snap your fuckin’ neck right now!"
"I'm sorry Tae! I'm so sorry!" I cried.
"Ughhh!" Tamar pushed me to the floor. I swear to God I got so much love for you Roz, do you know how hard it is for me not to fuck you up right now?" Tamar's hands were trembling so I know he was itching to hit me.
"I tho
ught I was showing you how much I love you by bringing you out here and making you my wife. You go fuck my best friend ‘cause you find out some bitch I can give two fucks about is pregnant by me! A hoe I got pregnant when I thought your ass was dead! Fuckin’ dead man! Yea you really showing a nigga how much you love him though." Tamar grabbed a shirt and threw it over his body; he then picked his keys up from the table.
"Tamar, I didn't have sex with him earlier. Please believe me!"
"Go get Marion and get your ass back in here, don't leave unless I know where you going!" He stormed out the room slamming the door behind him.
I lay on the floor for a while wondering how I let everything get turned around on me. I was supposed to be the one yelling at Tamar, my secret wasn't supposed to come out. I planned to carry that one to my grave.
***
I pretty much spent the rest of the day in the hotel suite taking care of Tamarion and soaking in guilt. Brian and Starr tried to get me to join them on the beach but I refused. Tamar didn't say I couldn't go anywhere but I knew for a fact that he wouldn't want me out this room.
The next morning Cheryl came storming in the room taking over Tamarion's care. She said that Tamar said to put my swimsuit on and meet everybody in the lobby so that I could join them on the jet skis.
When I walked out to the lobby everybody was there excluding Brandon and Brittany. I refused to make eye contact with anyone and walked over to Kayla who was wearing a black maternity swimming suit.
"Hey, have you talked to Kevin? I tried calling but he wouldn't answer," I said rubbing Kayla's stomach.
"He wouldn't answer for me either. He not mad at you though. Toya text him and told him she was keeping the baby." Kayla asked.
"Damn, you okay?"
Kayla held her hand up showing off her ring, "I got the ring so I'm good and it's not the same ring he bought with the money she was giving him either. And another thing I'm having his first child, his first son so I don't give a fuck what Toya does."
Damn, Kayla was right. Now that I was seeing things from her point of view everything Starr said to me was starting to make since. I shouldn't have stormed out of the room and I damn sure shouldn't have called Brandon for a shoulder to lean on. I really hoped Tamar could forgive me for everything; I was going to forgive him. I pray that he doesn't call off the engagement or the wedding; the fact that we were still here was a good sign.
"Rozalyn!" Starr yelled. I turned around and saw her and Brian jumping in the backseat of a limo along with Keylan, Money, Dmitri and I assumed Dmitri's jump off ‘cause she surely wasn't his fiancé of the past six years. I glanced Tamar's way then made my way over to the limo jumping in the backseat.
"Fire up the weed ‘cause ain't no way I'm about to get on no jet skis sober. This shit for the white folks," Starr said handing Money a lighter.
"Stop being scary," Keylan said handing Money a blunt that was sitting behind his ear.
"So Rozalyn you ready to do this?" Dmitri asked smiling at me. I assumed he hadn't heard the news about what went down last night.
"Yea I was but I don't think it's gonna happen now," I said looking out the window.
"What, why not? Everything okay? Tamar didn't say anything to me this morning when he picked us up at the airport."
"They got into a little disagreement but they good," Keylan said accepting one of the blunts that was in rotation.
"Oh I was about to say. I came to see a fuckin’ wedding since my ass is never getting married," Dmitri and his jump off laughed along with everybody else in the car.
Starr handed me the blunt then whispered in my ear, "Keylan, wants to take me out tonight. What I supposed to say?"
I took a deep toke from the blunt then handed it to the jump off, then looked at Starr like she was crazy. As far as I knew her and Latoya didn't have any problems and I didn't want her to make the same mistake I did. I leaned over and whispered back in her ear.
"What about Toya?" I asked.
"You fuck over my girl then you fuck over me. That's irrelevant," Starr said out loud.
"That's right. Let's have a toast to loyalty!" Dmitri countered grabbing a bottle of champagne from the limo's cooler. The ride was a very interesting one; I was able to witness Dmitri being more relaxed than I've ever seen him. He was engaging in conversation, laughing, and having a good time. I thought he didn't have a personality.
I stood on the side lines watching Keylan and Money suit up to go on the jet-ski's first. I wanted to check out how dangerous it was before I decided whether or not I wanted to do it.
"Put this on," Tamar handed me a life jacket.
"Thank you," I said.
"Did you call the lady and tell her which dresses you wanted her to bring?"
"No, ‘cause I didn't know if you still wanted to do it or not."
"Did you hear me say that I didn't want to?"
"I just..."
"What did you change your mind? Oh let me guess you rather marry Brandon, right?"
"No....Tae I'm sorry," I cried wiping the tears from my eyes with the back of my hand.
Tamar grabbed my hand and shoved it in my face, "You better get that ring back on your fuckin’ finger the minute you get to that room!"
I shook my head yes and began to put my life jacket on, I was shedding tears out of the guilt I felt for what I had done and also because Tamar still wanted to be with me; marry me. I joined the rest of the crew that was standing close by the beach, watching Money and Keylan glide back and forward across the beach both screaming like little girls. They had everybody laughing at they asses; just hearing how soft their voices all of sudden became.
Everybody took turns going two at a time; surprisingly I wasn't as scared as I thought I was going to be. It proved to be pretty fun and a great adrenaline rush. Once we were done there we all went scuba diving, then snorkeling. I have never had so much fun in my life; here I was seventeen years old, abandoned by my mother, meeting my father for the first time only 2 years ago along with my brother Zavier. I've been shot, brutalized, raped, lost my first born, kidnapped, then kidnapped again only to be raped over and over again, and brutalized some more but I was able to come thru it all. Now that I look back on some of the things that have happened; I could learn to appreciate my present. I feel that my past is only making me stronger and stronger each day. It has also made me thankful that I am able to be with a man that I love with every breath in my body and have great friends around to watch me get married in a couple of days. Everybody could've turned their backs on me, left me as a distant memory or just moved on with their lives but it wasn't like that. They all welcomed me back into their lives and did whatever they could to help me get over the tragedies I experienced. I was gonna be sure that from now on that I never did anything to hurt the people I love again.
***
"Nah, it's a real small function. Just family is all." Tamar said over the phone. "A’ight $3000? That's it?"
I walked over to Tamar and sat his food in front of him then took a seat across from him. We had only three more days before the big event and were trying to get everything in order. I picked out a Lilac colored dress as the dress that I was getting married in. Everybody thought I was crazy but I didn't care. Almost every bride got married in white and I wanted to be different. Taylana, Starr, Kayla, and yes Brian were the bride’s maids and their dresses were white, except Brian who was wearing a white suit. Tamar would be wearing black suit with a lilac vest and his best man and groomsmen would also be wearing white suits like Brian. Tamar and I haven't spoken about anything except the wedding, he hasn't touched me and every time I tried to touch him he pushed me away. I was surprised that the whole thing was still on.
"They only gonna charge three stacks for that food. I thought it was gonna be more than that," Tamar said as he picked up a crab leg from his plate.
"That's good. Can we talk? I kind of want everything to be out on the table before we do this. I rather you know everything now versus later."<
br />
"I wanna hear the truth Rozalyn if it ain't the truth then save it."
"It's the truth Tamar," I sighed knowing that this would probably piss Tamar off even further but I rather let it be known now instead of waiting for Brandon to tell all later. I told Tamar about the first time I slept with Brandon back in Atlanta, then told him the whole story about the night Shalea came and crashed the party in Miami. I didn’t leave out one detail; from the time we pulled away from the condo, and ended up in the hotel having sex. Even down to the part where Brandon and I were ambushed on the freeway and me being taken away by P.J.. I gave him every detail of what happened on the beach the other night too; I didn’t go as far as saying that Brandon raped me but I did let Tamar know that it wasn’t consensual sex.
After I finished, Tamar didn’t say a word. He continued eating his food and going through his phone. As bad as I didn’t want any of this to come out I knew it was for the best. I just hoped that we could get past this and leave it in the past where it belonged.
23 BRANDON
The Best Man?
Can't believe that after I exposed everything for what it really was Tamar's bitch ass still wanted to put a ring on Rozalyn's finger and wife her. Everybody out here knew she got down with me on several occasions and they was all here cheering the two them on like the bitch did nothing wrong.
Not to get things twisted, I am not mad at Rozalyn nor do I hate her for what she is about to do. One has to understand that Tamar got her wrapped up in this little spell that she can't see what's real and what's fake.
She was just pouring her heart out to me about Tamar's relationship with Diamond and how hurt she was behind it but this nigga was still the light of her damn eyes. I've always been there when Tamar beat her ass senselessly, cheated on her, and turned his fuckin’ back on her and she couldn't even see that I was the guy for her.