Hurt You

by Abby Mccarthy

  Maura needed me, and I did my best to keep her mind off of whatever it was that was bothering her. I wanted to find out why my friend was hurting, and I wanted to make it disappear. The thing about true friendship is, it doesn’t matter what happened; if Maura was right or wrong; because I would be here for her. Friendship and family were the two most important things in the world to me. You could have a man, but what good is he without the people who helped build you up.

  We danced and drank. I made an ass of myself and cracked her up on the club’s stripper pole. I fell a bunch, sometimes on purpose and sometimes not. We stumbled back to her room sometime later, and landed on her bed. “You want to talk about it?” I asked Maura, knowing that in the darkness of her room she might let it out.

  “I feel so broken, Jenny,” Maura admitted, then silently cried in my arms until she fell asleep.

  Maura was a hard sleeper and had never stirred before when I snuck off to see Jules. Tonight, I waited a lot longer than usual. If she woke up, I wanted to be here for her. Finally, when I knew there was no chance of her waking, I went to him.

  Jules was in his bed with the lights off. The sound of the door locking and Jules breathing was all I heard. I worried he was asleep, but I figured awake or not, I would take any time with him I could get. I pulled my clothes off and slid under the covers so that I could feel my body next to Jules. His arm slid around my waist and he pulled me in close to him.

  “How’s Maura?” he asked as he kissed the back of my neck.

  “I’m not sure yet. She’s sleeping right now, but I don’t really know what happened yet.”

  He placed a few more kisses against my neck and then said, “I missed you.”

  “I missed you so much. This week has been so hard,” I admitted.

  “I don’t like it,” Jules said and kissed me again, then propped himself up on an elbow and pulled me on my back so that I was looking at him. “We have to figure something else out. This week has driven me crazy.”

  I bit my lip and contemplated this. I wanted to sneak off and see him more, but I didn’t want to put him at risk with Antonio. “What if we text if we need each other, and then if we both can get away, we meet at our spot?”

  “Alright Jenny, that’s what we’ll do, for now,” Jules said, looking a bit more defeated. I knew he wanted more from me, and I wished I could give it to him. So, I gave him what I could. I lifted up and pressed my lips to his. He was sweet at first, then our kisses turned into more of a heated frenzy like they always did.

  ***

  “I made you something,” Jules said, not long after he gave my body a good workout.

  “You did?” I asked with anticipation.

  Jules stood, walked over to his side table where his sketch pad lay and flipped through the pages until he found what he was looking for. I saw a smile creep over his face and then he tore the paper out and brought it to me. I couldn't help but grin at him. His body was so beautiful. He was his own masterpiece. Now that I was more familiar with his work, I could see how his designs adorned his skin. Every inch of ink was an intricate piece of art that I knew Jules placed in that particular spot on purpose. It was beautiful. He was beautiful.

  Jules climbed back into bed and laid behind me spooning me close. He handed me the paper deliberately face down because he knew I was impatient. His fingertips brushed over mine as I turned over the white paper. There I was. You couldn't see my face, but I knew it was me. My head was thrown back. My dark hair tumbled down my back. The curves of my breast peeked out my sides, sheets covered my thighs and you couldn't quite make out the silhouette of Jules under me. He was there, but it was almost an illusion.

  “This is…,”

  “Beautiful,” he said, finishing my sentence and staring at me, making me feel shy under his gaze.

  “I was going to say the most amazing piece of artwork that I’ve ever seen. I love it, Jules.”

  We spent the next few hours taking advantage of our time together; sometimes being intimate, and other times I would look through Jules’ things. It was as though every book on his shelves and every picture he drew, gave me insight into who Jules was. I couldn't get enough of him. I wanted to know every part. I knew it was wrong and that I was only giving in to something I couldn't have, but I couldn't help myself.

  The next day, I came to see Maura at the clubhouse. We joked about Daws and she finally told me everything that happened between her and Corbin. I wanted to think the best of him, and deep down I knew things would work out.

  Time seemed to be moving fast. Maura was staying at a bed and breakfast a few hours away from DC. She and Corbin had a major misunderstanding and I really felt like Maura just needed to find herself. I understood that, but I missed her like crazy.

  Jules and I would meet at our spot. We would make love outside until the weather turned to cold and then he would bring his truck. Jules had been gone for a week with Daws on some club business, and when I got the text to meet him, I practically flew up Lake Green to the overlook.

  It physically felt like a part of me was missing. I was sad. I started this as something casual, but I think I wasn’t being totally honest with myself when I told myself it was casual. There was nothing casual about us and the amount of happiness I felt with just a simple text that read, meet me- J, had butterflies taking flight in my stomach. I was anxious and couldn't wait to see him.

  I reached the overlook before Jules and as soon as he pulled up on his bike, I was running. He barely had one leg off of the large black and chrome bike before I leaped up, threw my arms around his neck and my legs around his waist.

  “I take it you missed me?” he chuckled in between kisses.

  “So much, Jules. So much!” I said kissing his neck. He finally put me down. A part of me wanted to rip his clothes off right there, because Jules looked amazing; and another part of me just wanted to hear his voice. His deep rasp was melodic to my ears. Any stress that I had melted away as soon as he spoke.

  We walked over to the bench hand in hand. Jules’ hands had a roughness to them from hard work, yet there was still a softness to them. I ran my fingers over the divot on his middle finger, the one that was there from holding a pencil. It made me wonder if I was the only woman to know that about him.

  “Tell me about your day?” Jules asked as he wrapped his arm around my waist.

  “Not much to tell. I drove Gino and Ari to school this morning because Carlo was exhausted. Those two kids are so remarkable. You should see how close they are. I know that Ari went through something. The way she connects with Gino is just something else. Then, I went to work, but two of my appointments canceled and the salon was dead. So, I went shopping for Halloween costumes for the club’s Halloween party.

  “You’ll be there?” Jules asked hopefully.

  “I will. I even think I’ll be able to get Maura to come home for it,” I said excitedly.

  “Good. When I’m at those things I get annoyed with all the fake chicks. It will be nice to know that you’re nearby.”

  A pang of jealousy spread through me at the thought of any slutty club chicks hanging all over Jules. I hated my situation. I wanted nothing more than to tell Jules, to hell with everything, if a chick comes near you, I’ll scratch her eyes out, but how fair would that be? I couldn't make us exclusive, even if I had no intention of being with anyone else.

  “Then I’ll find a way at the party to let you know how nearby I can be,” I flirted. “Tell me about what you did while you were gone?” I asked trying to hide behind the ruse of my flirtatious banter. I was praying like hell that he didn't tell me he had found a woman while he was away. Even though I knew he deserved someone who could give him more than what I as offering.

  “It’s stupid really. There is this sister club; The Blue Valkyries. We have to sort out their love lives. Some chicks are sleeping with guys at rival clubs. Everyone’s up in arms. Daws and I literally had to patch up relationships. It’s not done, either. I’m sure we will have
to go back and check on things. That club is a whole mess of drama and I wish Dray would just cut our ties.”

  I stifled a giggle, “I can't even imagine you and Daws in the middle of that kind of drama.”

  “No lie, it was utter bullshit, but if we don’t straighten that shit out, alliances we have are close to crumbling all over fucking pussy,” he said, shaking his head. I smacked his arm playfully at him saying pussy.

  “So, a sister club?” I asked, “That’s a biker club filled with women?” I couldn't help it, I had to ask.

  “Why Jenny? Would that bother you?” Jules squeezed me in close to his side like he wanted the answer to be yes.

  “No, I was just curious,” I lied thinking it was the safest thing for him. I said this looking away so he wouldn't see my eyes. I knew if he saw the look of panic on my face that he would know how afraid I truly was of him being with another woman.

  “Well, not the answer I was looking for, but I’ll make this clear to you. It would bother the fuck out of me if you were with someone else. Have you been?”

  I had to be honest. “No Jules, I haven’t. I won’t if that’s what you want, but you can do whatever you want,” I said, regret lacing my words.

  “Jesus, Jenny. Haven’t you figured out yet that you’re the only one I want? And you better, not ever let any guy near you, but me. This right here,” he said cupping my breast with one hand while his other hand stroked my cheek, “It’s mine. Even if we're the only ones who know about us right now; it doesn't make it any less true.”

  I couldn’t help it, I loved him calling me his. It made me feel wanted and loved. Being in Jules’ arms washed away everything. Nothing else mattered when I was with him, I was his completely. Heck even when I wasn’t. Hearing his admissions and knowing a part of me held so much fear had me asking myself, was it okay to live in the moment with Jules?

  “I’m yours, Baby. I really am. I can't even tell you how much I wish that I could let everyone know too. When I’m with you, you make me feel so alive.” I needed him to know how he made me feel. So, Jules did what he did best, he made me feel.

  He peppered my face with kisses. His soft, beautiful lips started on my forehead, then my eyelids, my cheeks and finally my lips. I think he needed to hear me say those things. He needed faith in what I felt for him. Jules had shaved the hair on his lip so all he had was a small beard. I was able to feel more of his soft skin as his teeth tugged playfully at my pink lips. I stared into his beautiful icy blue eyes and was lost, like only Jules could make me feel. There was no danger when he kissed me, there was no fear; it was just Jules and Jenny.

  ***

  The temperatures outside cooled quickly, and before I knew it, Halloween was upon us. At the last minute Maura decided to come home, and was excited about the costumes I’d picked out for us. We were Switch and Trinity from the Matrix. Maura was Trinity, decked out in black pleather and I was the polar opposite in my Switch costume. I wore a short platinum blonde wig, which was no small feat getting my hair to stick to my head, a white tank, white leather pants and white knee high boots. We had fake guns holstered to our sides. Basically, we were bad-ass.

  The club’s party was at Benny’s. It was a fundraiser that Daws’ mom and some of the other old ladies worked on. The whole bar was decked out. There were cobwebs everywhere, fake coffins, mummies, fake blood and gore everywhere. Dry ice sat in different corners of the room giving a foggy effect to the bar. Most patrons had costumes on, but the guys in the club wore their vests proudly. A band, dressed as ZZ Top, played rock music on one side of the room.

  I was so excited to hang out with my girl. It had been weeks since I had seen her last. Maura and I did shots, danced and laughed; our usual. Aubrey came too. She looked adorable in a Dorothy costume. Her hair was in pigtails, her dress was checked blue and white and her feet were covered in ruby sparkles. Ari had picked it out and Aubrey wouldn't deny that girl by not wearing it. It was a testament to her devotion, and I admired Aubrey’s strength. My brother Vito brought her and kept a close watch on her. I could see he felt protective of her.

  Jules sat in a booth with Daws, and I could feel his eyes on me all night. With my costume on, I felt like I could flirt more than usual with him. Maybe it was the disguise I needed, because I gave him flirty glances, bit my lip seductively or licked my lips whenever we made eye contact. In the white wig, I was safe. I wasn't Jenny; a woman doing her best to protect the people she loved. I was Switch; the woman in white who had her eyes on the biker whose hair she just cut.

  Jules was over earlier in the day. I cut his hair as quickly as I could, so that I could show him just how much I appreciated him. We had an amazing afternoon, but it had to be cut short because Maura was on her way.

  Maura sauntered over and asked Daws if he would talk to her. Things hadn't gone down smoothly between the two of them, but I was sure that Daws had his eyes on Aubrey and was getting over his crush on Maura. The two went outside and I boldly motioned for Jules to follow me as I walked into the kitchen area of the bar. Jack, the bartender, gave me a look, but I shook my head no to him, and he closed his mouth once he saw Jules hot on my tail.

  “It’s about time. I was going crazy watching you. What are you doing to me?” Jules asked pushing me against the walk-in freezer doors. I kissed him hard, slipping my tongue in and exploring every inch of his mouth. I couldn't help it. I felt like a different woman, one who was free to do as she pleased. What I wanted was to please Jules. I broke our kiss and grabbed the handle to the freezer door and pushed us inside, away from everyone.

  The freezer was cold, but it didn’t really matter to me. “You look so sexy tonight,” Jules said sliding his hands over my tight leather pants, “And these look amazing.”

  “Me? I can barely keep my eyes off of you,” I panted and started kissing his neck. I needed to be as fierce as I was feeling. “All of you!” I said cupping his hard length through his jeans.

  I dropped to my knees on the rubber mat, unzipped him, and sprang his cock free from his jeans. “Jules, I want you in my mouth.” Jules gave me a sexy half smirk that told me he wasn't going to argue. I swirled my tongue around his tip tasting his bead of precum and then I sucked in his length. I stared up at him as he slid his perfect length into my mouth. His eyes were molten, filled with excitement, desire, and whoa!! What’s that look? Love? It couldn't be, could it?

  There is almost a look of adoration in his eyes. I sucked in his length fast, drawing him in and out. My hand cupped his balls while my index finger put pressure on that spot right behind them. Jules sucked in a breath, then he groaned and shuddered. I wanted to slow him down, so I could savor the moment, but I wouldn’t take that from him. I could tell he needed this just as much as I did. I moved my hand from his balls and grabbed the back of his ass pushing his length into my mouth as far as it could go.

  “Oh, Babe. That’s it,” his voice was heated, turning me on even more. I increased my speed and moved one hand from his hip to help pump his cock in and out of my mouth. “Jenny… Oh fuck, that’s amazing. I’m gonna…,” he began to say until I cupped his balls again and gave a soft squeeze and then Jules threw his head back and let out the most beautiful groan. It was a deep rumble filled with pure pleasure.

  I stood and helped Jules tuck himself back into his jeans. My lips were slightly swollen, but I liked the tingle that was left behind. It added to my bold feeling that my costume and brazen behavior gave me. I’d never done anything as bold as this before, but sneaking around with Jules had a thrill to it that added to the euphoric high that being around him always gave me.

  I went to reach for the freezer door to make my exit and Jules grabbed my hand and stopped me. His fingertips ran down the length of my face, “I need more babe. Meet me.”

  I couldn't deny the man if I wanted to, he had a hold on me. “Our spot?” I questioned.

  “No, I need you in a bed. Head towards the clubhouse, about a mile past it there is a long drive on your right. You�
��ll see a large log cabin that’s Dray’s. Veer to the left, you’ll see a small cabin that’s vacant, he lived there while they built their house.”

  “Got it!” I smiled excitedly.

  “I’m going to leave soon and get it ready, but I’ll have eyes on you so don’t worry, you’ll be safe.”

  I was on a constant high the rest of the night. Aubrey didn't stay much longer. She left with Daws, and I just knew that she was changing that man for the better.

  “Let’s dance one more song,” Maura pleaded. I was anxious to get to Jules, but I also wasn't sure when I would see Maura again.

  “Okay, one more. These boots are killing my feet.”

  “We can sit this out then. Besides I need to ask you about something,” Maura said.

  “Hey Jack, get me a water, would ya?” I asked and was met with strange looks from both Maura and Jack. He handed me a water, and Maura and I took a seat at one of the tables farthest away from the dance floor.

  “How did things go with Daws?” I asked her knowing that they had a few words earlier.

  “Things went okay. I think it’s just going to take a little time. I think he has a thing for Aubrey.”

  “I think she might have a thing for him too,” I admitted, knowing that Aubrey most definitely had a thing for Daws, even if she hasn’t acted on it.

  “She seemed sweet. Do you think she’ll be good for him?” she asked.

  “I think Aubrey has a past and if Daws can break through it, they'll be amazing.”

  “Good. He deserves to be happy.”

  “Are you happy?” I asked, knowing that Maura was still holding out hope that Corbin would one day forgive her for a misunderstanding the two had.

  “You know, I’m really learning a lot about myself right now, but I miss him.”

  I reached over and gave Maura’s hand a squeeze, “I know you do.”

  “So, I have to know. Is there something going on between you and Jules?”