Because no one had been waiting for her after all.
nine
• RULE #9 •
Remember to circulate the books that are offered. If, after four months, no one chooses a book, it’s time to trade it in for something new.
Aaron had taken to writing his notes in an old-fashioned steno pad that he’d bought to help him wade through the large amount of information he was learning for the test.
After his first tutoring session with Kayla, he’d realized there was a lot he didn’t understand in the study guide, not just terms, but even references to the outside world that he wasn’t familiar with. Then, there were other areas he thought he understood but needed clarification. He wrote those notes and questions down, often referencing the page numbers and sometimes even starring certain points, essentially prioritizing his concerns since there was no way Kayla could be expected to help him with all of those questions and go over new material, too.
Among all those notes and points and questions, he’d also started writing other things. Notes about his dreams. Scribbles of worries about the test, or how he didn’t feel too good about keeping so much from his family. But he wrote down thoughts about Tim most of all.
When he was young, he’d idolized his brother. He’d been sure no other person had been as strong, smart, or good-looking at Tim Coblentz. Not that Tim had given him much notice. Instead, he’d kept to himself as much as possible and questioned just about everything their parents said. But, sometimes, late at night, Aaron would peek into his room, and Tim would grin and motion for him to come inside. He’d show Aaron whatever newspaper or magazine he’d gotten ahold of from the outside and talk about things he’d want to do. When Aaron had once confided that he never wanted to live among the Englisch, Tim had just laughed. “Of course you don’t, bruder. You’re as perfect here as I am imperfect.”
Now, all these years later, Aaron realized that he shouldn’t have been so shocked about Tim’s departure. It was almost as if Tim had been born to leave and go out on his own—just as it was starting to seem as if he was destined to try so hard to fit in.
Which was really why his quest to take the GED didn’t make sense. He wasn’t the type of man to disregard his parents’ wishes or to keep secrets from the people he loved.
Maybe he wasn’t so different from Tim after all?
Or, was there another reason? Lately, he was starting to think that he was spending more time thinking about Kayla than anything else. He was sure writing enough notes to her! No, that wasn’t right. They were notes about Kayla, notes he had no intention of her ever seeing. Notes he was embarrassed to even be thinking, let alone putting to paper.
But that didn’t seem to stop him from filling up pages with this thoughts and reflections.
Now, sitting on his bed and skimming through his cramped scrawl, he frowned at it all. What does all this mean?
I wonder what was wrong today. Did something happen?
How did you end up in the situation you are in? Why did you study for the GED? Had you had college plans? What happened, and why are you living at home?
Does your family know you took the tests, or did you keep it a secret like I’ve been doing? But, if that’s the case, why did you decide to start tutoring me?
Of course, she would never see those notes, just like he would never actually ask her such things. It wasn’t proper, and it wasn’t any of his business.
But, well, he wished it was.
What he needed to do was rip out those pages and burn them. Then, he could pretend that he hadn’t been so nosy and he wouldn’t have to worry about his family or Kayla happening upon them.
Yet, he still didn’t do that.
Exasperated with himself, he tossed the steno pad in his backpack, along with the study guide and a recent library book, and headed out. He had just enough time to stop by the bookmobile before he began his shift at the furniture store.
After grabbing his lunch and coat, he waved goodbye to his mother and set off toward town. Today, Sarah Anne was going to be near the feed-and-seed store just half a mile away.
He breathed a sigh of relief when he saw that the big vehicle was still parked in the lot, and wonder of wonders, there were hardly any people there.
The moment she saw him, Sarah Anne’s eyes lit up. “Aaron, now isn’t this a good surprise. I’m glad to see you.”
Feeling like he’d just been given a verbal hug, he smiled at her. “I’m glad to see you, too. But did you forget? I told you I’d try to get here this morning.”
“I didn’t forget. However, I’ve come to learn over the years that trying and actually doing are two different things. At least it’s that way for me.”
“For me as well. In any case, I’m glad I got here. For a moment I didn’t think I would. My life has gotten busy of late.”
“Care to tell me why you’ve been so busy?” Looking mighty pleased with herself, she prodded, “Could it have anything to do with a certain tutor?”
“It does.” He wasn’t so sure what he thought about the knowing gleam in her eyes, but he forged ahead. “Kayla has been helpful. She is a good tutor.”
“I had the opportunity to visit with her a few days ago. She told me you were a good student. That’s high praise, I think.”
“That’s kind of her to say, but it’s not true.”
“Oh?”
“I work hard, but learning all of that information doesn’t come easily.”
“Don’t forget that much of what you are learning is unfamiliar. They might not have taught the building blocks in your Amish schoolhouse.”
“They didn’t.”
“See?” Sarah Anne smiled at him encouragingly. “You’ll get it. Kayla believes you will.” Though he should have been pleased by the comment, he was disappointed. He had hoped that she was seeing him as something more than just a younger man fumbling through lessons. “She’s very smart, and I’m afraid she sometimes doesn’t know what to think about my struggles.”
“If she has ever thought that, she didn’t tell me.” Sarah Anne bent down and picked up a pencil that someone had dropped. “She thanked me for giving you her name.”
“Ah. Well, I’m glad it’s working out.” He tried to smile.
She smiled back at him. “Before I forget, I picked up a couple new mysteries for Jack in case you stopped by. Would you like to take them or no?”
“I’ll take them. If we waited on Jack to get here, we’d be waiting till the cows came home.”
She chuckled. “They’re on the bookshelf behind my desk. You’ll see three in a stack with your name on it. Go check them out while I help these folks who just came in.”
After checking the old-fashioned clock above her desk, Aaron scanned the multiple piles of books and plucked out his stack. There were three new releases, one a thriller set in New York City, one a cozy mystery set in Ireland, and the last looked to be a humorous Amish mystery set in Lancaster County. Liking the idea of Jack fancying a trip to Ireland, at least in his mind, he set the stack on the counter. Then he wandered around and picked up a biography and a children’s book on chemistry. He needed all the help he could get!
“Need any help?”
“Nee. Danke.” No way did he want Sarah Anne to see his children’s book. Quickly, he pulled out his library card and checked out the books on his own. “Danke, Sarah Anne.”
“Anytime, Aaron. See you next time.”
Then, with a quick wave to Sarah Anne, he secured his backpack, buttoned up his coat, and headed out.
He had a quick fifteen-minute walk to work, and he was grateful for the time to think. And that was what he needed to do, for sure and for certain. He needed to remember his goals and his secrets. He needed to only think about passing that test. That was it.
Then, once he accomplished that tall task and put that piece of paper in a drawer in his desk, he could concentrate on things that mattered. Things like his family and his job.
Yes, those were the
things that mattered, things his family valued, things he valued. Furthermore, they were things one could trust and count on. He needed to remember that.
As he approached the store, he reminded himself that Kayla was just a means to achieve his goals. She was not his future. He was her student, a way to make some extra money. That was all. She was never going to be his girlfriend. One day she wouldn’t even remember his name.
Yes, that stung, but sometimes reality did sting, and there was nothing wrong with that.
He hoped one day he’d believe that.
ten
• RULE #10 •
Invest in disinfectant and wipe down everything you can, often. Your bookmobile is essentially your home away from home. Don’t let it make you sick.
“Ma’am? Mrs. Miller?” the mother of the three young hellions called out.
With effort, Sarah Anne bit back that she wasn’t a “missus.” Well, not anymore. She was in her sixties now. Her marital status didn’t matter, did it?
“How can I help you?” she asked instead, trying valiantly not to wince when one of those little boys put his sticky hands all over the four new picture books she had displayed.
“My oldest wants a book that’s exciting.” She lowered her voice. “It can’t be too hard, either. He’s a little behind in school.”
Hating the way the boy’s cheeks had heated, she said, “I can help with that. What’s your name?”
“Evan.”
“Well, Evan, come with me. I’ve got a couple of ideas. And if none of these books tickle your fancy, I’ll bring some different ones when I come back next week.”
As the middle boy systematically pulled out book after book and the youngest started to cry, their mother called out, “Evan, we can’t come back next week. Pick something now.”
Looking put upon, Evan looked up at Sarah Anne. “Do you have anything with adventure?”
Thanking the good Lord for Percy Jackson, she smiled. “I was just thinking about this book,” she said as she picked up the first in the series. “Have you heard of this?”
“Yeah, but I don’t know.”
She placed it in his hands just as his brother started crying louder. “It’s really good.” When he continued to appear doubtful, she added, “I’m not the only one who thinks that, either. The stories are exciting from page one. I hope you’ll give it a try.”
“Evan, get something this minute. We’ve got to go before your brother turns this whole place inside out!” his mother called out.
Sarah Anne took care not to move. “What do you think?”
Looking like she’d just handed him some cough syrup, the boy shrugged. “I guess I’ll give it a try.”
“I’m so glad. Now, who has the library card?”
“I do,” the mom called out, looking even more frazzled. “We want these three, too.”
As another four people walked inside, Sarah reached for both the card and the books and quickly scanned it all… then shooed them all out the door in such an efficient way that her old department head would have been proud.
The moment the door closed behind them, one of the ladies who’d come in called her. “Mrs. Miller, could you help me, please?”
“I’d be happy to,” she bit out. Boy, some days, she couldn’t catch a break!
* * *
Two hours later, Sarah Anne pulled into her last stop for the day. It was in the most northern part of her territory and served the smallest number of people. Sometimes, she would only see one or two customers during her two-hour stop.
Actually, of late, she’d been thinking that it was time to take the stop out of her schedule. The person who had originally requested the stop was in Florida for the winter, and the other folks who’d come from time to time hadn’t shown up in weeks.
Today, however, she was looking forward to a few hours of solitude. After the craziness in the other parking lot, she felt like everything was disorganized, sticky, and in complete disarray. She also needed to double-check the computer program and make sure that her records were up to date. For a while there, all she’d been doing was checking out books and listening for beeps. She had a big bin of returned books and a slight suspicion that at least a handful of titles left without getting checked out.
After making a cup of tea in her electric kettle, she settled in and got to work. Feeling like she was taking care of her friends, she wiped off books, scanned and sorted them, some going back on the shelves, others in another cabinet to go back into general circulation.
An hour flew by. Pleased to have the time to get so much done, she was startled when the door opened and a man about her age entered. He was wearing a baggy pair of jeans, some well-worn work boots, a green plaid flannel shirt, and a thick fleece. He also had an almost completely bald head and dark brown eyes.
He stood in the doorway, looking around like he’d entered the wrong place.
“May I help you?” she asked.
“Are you open?”
“I am. I’m going to be parked here for one more hour.”
He looked at the table covered in books, thanks to the little boys’ destruction, and then over at a set of filled bookshelves. “I’ve never been in here before. How does it work?”
“We have a limited selection of books and DVDs. If there’s something here you’re interested in, you check it out.” She pointed to the two computer terminals set up. “If not, you can look at the main library database and order a book. I’ll bring it to you next time I’m here.”
“That’s it?”
She smiled. “That’s it.” Getting to her feet, she said, “Did you come in for something in particular?”
“No.” He shrugged. “Just was looking for something new to read.”
“Well, you came to the right place.” Gosh, she hoped she didn’t sound as eager as she felt.
“I guess I did. Thanks for your help, Miss…?”
The first person who didn’t call her Mrs. in weeks! “It’s Miss Miller,” she said, trying not to grin like it was Christmas Day. “But, please, feel free to call me Sarah Anne. Sarah Anne Miller.”
“Pete Canon.” He paused, then held out one rugged hand.
Shaking it, Sarah Anne suddenly was really glad she had another reason not to take this stop off her schedule.
“Did I understand correctly that you will be here next week?”
“You did.” She handed him her schedule. “Feel free to take a copy of it, if you’d like.”
Scanning the neatly organized calendar, he whistled softly. “You cover quite a big area.”
“I like to think I do. But that’s the purpose of mobile library services, right? I’m here to reach patrons who are unable to get to the brick-and-mortar libraries.”
He looked around the small space. “And you do it all alone?”
“I do.” She lifted her chin.
“That’s a lot on your slim shoulders.”
She was pleased he acknowledged just how labor-intensive her job was. She was also vain enough to have caught that he’d called her shoulders slim. How complimentary, she thought.
On the other hand, she also didn’t like to be thought of as helpless. She was proud of herself for maintaining her schedule and doing the majority of the work by herself. “It is a lot, but it’s nothing I can’t handle. I’m a fairly capable woman,” she added.
He grinned. “Good to know.”
He was teasing her, and with good reason, too. I’m a fairly capable woman, indeed. She’d sounded so full of herself. “Forget I just said that.”
“Not on your life. I’m a fan of capable women.” Eyes still shining, he lifted his chin, meeting her gaze. “I’ll see you soon, then, Miss Sarah Anne Miller.”
She noticed his hands were empty. “Wait a minute. Did you want to check something out?”
“Not today. I’ll be back.”
“Well, then. I’ll see you then.”
He chuckled before giving her a salute and turning away.
Only when the door snapped shut behind him did she realize that she’d been half holding her breath. Goodness! Just like a teenage girl!
After opening the door and making sure no one was hurrying over to catch her before she went on her way, Sarah Anne readied the vehicle.
Then, feeling lighter than she had in quite some time, she started the engine and headed back to the main library campus. Usually by this time of day, she would be feeling tired and dreading the hour or so of paperwork and other activities that she’d have to do before she could end her shift.
But today, she was practically humming. Sure, it was silly and fanciful, but she’d had far too few silly and fanciful moments of late. She decided she kind of liked that feeling.
Liked it a lot.
eleven
• RULE #11 •
It’s okay if every day isn’t a good one. What matters is that you woke up.
“Are you sure you ain’t too cold?” Joel asked again as they walked along a faint path around the pond on his family’s property.
“I’m sure.” It was cold, but the air could have been twenty degrees colder and she still wouldn’t have noticed. Joel had that effect on her.
He still looked concerned. “I should’ve given you one of my scarves to wear around your neck.”
She laughed. As romantic comments went, it left a lot to be desired. She already had on her white kapp, a black bonnet over it, a thick peacock-blue wool dress, black tights, boots, mittens, and her new dark wool cape. She did not need a scarf, too.
Though, if it still held his scent, maybe it would be nice?
Realizing that she needed to move their conversation on or Joel would continue to worry, she said, “Before we know it, we’ll be walking around this pond and complaining about thistles.”
“Which means, of course, I’ll have to help you get those thorns and such out of your tights.”
A Perfect Amish Romance Page 7