Desire by Starlight

by Radclyffe

  “What are you trying to forget?” Gard asked softly.

  “I thought we agreed neat and simple. Let’s not go there, all right?”

  A muscle jumped at the edge of Gard’s jaw. She finally looked away from the road, her dark eyes searching Jenna’s face. “Did someone hurt you?”

  The force of Gard’s question, the anger that leapt into her eyes, made Jenna’s heart stutter. For one insane instant, she wanted to tell her everything. As if somehow Gard could change it all. Take away the hurt and the fear and the disappointment. But that was foolish. No one could do that for her. She knew that. What was it she wanted, then? Just for another person to know? No. Not any person. This person. Gard.

  “It doesn’t matter now,” Jenna said, nearly breathless. “It was a long time ago. You know what I mean.”

  “I do.” Gard drew Jenna’s hand onto her thigh, anchoring Jenna to her. “Didn’t mean to push you.”

  “I know. It’s okay.” Jenna pressed her fingertips into Gard’s leg. She was so solid. So strong. The knot that had formed in her stomach when she’d thought of Lancaster and Darlene melted away. “I had a great time this morning. Thank you.”

  “Even when you stepped in the cow shit?”

  “Maybe not then so much. But I loved watching you work.”

  Gard laughed.

  “No, really. I mean it. It’s obvious you’re good at what you do, and the farmers trust you. That must mean a lot to you.”

  Gard’s shoulders tightened. “What do you mean?”

  “I just meant it’s got to feel good when people appreciate what you’re doing.”

  “Is that what you meant.” Gard let go of Jenna’s hand and gripped the wheel, the skin over her knuckles tightening until the scratches stood out like angry red welts.

  “I don’t know what you think I was getting at, but you’re wrong,” Jenna said softly. Something had hurt Gard, and she hated not knowing what it was. She’d just told Gard they should leave the past out of their relationship, but she’d only meant they should leave her own past in the dark. She wanted to know everything about Gard. About where she grew up. About what she dreamed. About who had hurt her and why. She wanted to erase the angry pain that poured from her in waves, filling the truck’s cab with past sorrows. Cautiously, the way she’d seen Gard gentle a frightened horse just that morning, she rested her fingertips on Gard’s shoulder. “I’m sorry.”

  “Nothing to be sorry for.” Gard’s voice was so tight it sounded like a branch cracking under the weight of winter ice.

  “I’m sorry for whatever hurt you. And for reminding you of it.”

  Gard exhaled in a rush. “My history is not your problem.”

  “Fair enough.” Jenna rubbed Gard’s shoulder, then leaned closer so she could massage the back of her neck. The muscles quivered beneath her fingers. “Do you think we could stop—”

  “You want to cancel lunch?”

  Jenna spread her fingers through Gard’s hair, then tugged a little. “No. I want to buy a new pair of shoes. I’m not eating when my feet are this muddy.”

  Gard glanced at her, her lips pressed down on a smile that finally erupted as she laughed. “Shoes. Where are we going to get you shoes out here?”

  “I’m sure there must be somewhere people buy shoes.”

  “There is. Hold on.” Gard put her blinker on and swerved into a gravel parking lot in front of a long metal-sided building that looked like a gas station on steroids. A big white sign with green letters announced Agway.

  “Oh no,” Jenna said. “I’m not buying farmer boots.”

  “They’ll be better for you the next time you’re out on a call with me.”

  The next time. Would there be a next time? She hoped so. She looked at Gard and, foolish as it was, hoped for a lot more than that.

  Chapter Nineteen

  “Don’t look,” Jenna said, crouching with her back to the truck in the rear corner of the Agway parking lot, the passenger side door open to block her from view of anyone driving in. “Am I clear?”

  Gard swiveled behind the wheel and checked out the back to make sure no one was watching them. “You’re good to go.”

  Jenna unzipped her pants. “I can feel you looking.”

  “I have my eyes closed, but the cows up on the hill probably have a terrific view.”

  “Liar. Get my new jeans out of that bag and hand them to me, would you?”

  Gard rustled through the shopping bags on the floor, pulled out the new Levi’s, and quickly removed the labels. “Here you go.”

  Jenna half turned and her eyes met Gard’s. “I knew you were looking.”

  “You’ve got a really cute ass.” Gard’s throat went dry as Jenna’s smile flickered between amused and inviting. She did have a great ass, round and tight and just the right shape to fit into her hands. She remembered cradling Jenna’s butt while they were kissing in the kitchen and imagined Jenna naked on top of her, smooth muscles flexing under her fingers, hot slick skin sliding over hers. “Put your pants on.”

  “That’s not what you were thinking.”

  Jenna’s eyes had gotten hazy and her lips seemed to swell, as if readying for Gard’s mouth. Gard twitched as if someone had poked her with a cattle prod. When she groaned softly, Jenna laughed a satisfied laugh.

  “Cut it out,” Gard said through gritted teeth.

  “Or what?” Jenna stepped into the pants and took her time pulling them up, her brazen expression daring Gard to look, to touch, to take.

  “If you don’t cut it out, you’re going to get a lot more than a new set of clothes at the Agway.”

  “Is that right?” Jenna laughed and hopped up onto the seat, her feet clad only in her socks, and dug around in the bags. She came out with the new boots. “And what would that be, exactly?”

  While Jenna was busy with the laces on the new shitkickers, Gard took advantage of her distraction and slipped an arm behind her shoulders. She leaned over the gearshift and kissed Jenna on the neck.

  Jenna jumped. “Gard!”

  Gard caught Jenna’s head with a hand on her neck and took her mouth in a hard kiss. Jenna’s lips parted, warm and welcoming, and Gard deepened the kiss. Then Jenna’s fingers were in her hair and Jenna’s breasts were pressed to her chest and their tongues were searching, delving, demanding. Jenna hadn’t zipped her jeans and when Gard reached around her to hold her more tightly, her fingers grazed bare skin and the top of silk panties and Jenna jerked away.

  “We’ll get arrested,” Jenna gasped, her pupils huge and deep as night. “One more second of kissing you like that and I’m going to have to have you inside me.”

  Gard’s chest exploded as if she’d been shot. “Jesus Christ, Jenna.”

  “Don’t tell me you can’t tell.”

  “I can’t even think when all my blood and half my brains are headed between my legs.” Gard heaved herself back into her seat and scanned out the window. No one around. She rubbed both hands over her face. Her mind was mush and all she wanted was to touch her again—good sense, consequences, and lookie-loos be damned. “You’re making me nuts.”

  “Stay over there while I put these damn boots on.” Jenna jammed her feet into the ankle-high work boots, quickly laced them up, and jumped out of the truck. She pushed the tails of her pale yellow cotton shirt into her jeans, zipped and buttoned them. “Safe now.”

  Gard rolled her head on the seat and studied her. Her cheeks and neck were flushed, her eyes bright, her lips swollen. She let her gaze drop lower. The faint outline of Jenna’s nipples, hard and round, pressed outward beneath her shirt. Jenna’s breathing grew faster the longer Gard looked. “You’re a long way from safe. You like teasing me, don’t you?”

  Jenna rested her arms on the roof of the truck cab and leaned in, her crotch riding against the seat, her breasts pushing forward. She rocked her hips back and forth. “I haven’t even started to tease you yet.”

  “Get in the truck.”

  “In a hurry fo
r lunch?”

  “If you keep it up, we’re gonna have to get takeout.” Gard gripped the steering wheel in both hands. “There’s no way I can sit across from you in a restaurant without everybody knowing exactly what I’m thinking. And what I’m thinking is private.”

  “Is that right.” Jenna got in, closed the door, and put her hand on Gard’s thigh. She dragged her nails along the seam inside Gard’s thigh, up and down, up and down, until Gard’s hips lifted off the seat. “Then let’s have a picnic.”

  *

  “Where are we exactly?” Jenna peered out at the small turnaround where Gard parked. The road ended in a rutted trail narrowed by creeping undergrowth at the base of a mountainside thick with evergreens.

  “Right on the Vermont–New York border.” Gard cut the engine and came around to Jenna’s door. “Go ahead and pass me the food. There’s a blanket behind your seat too.”

  Jenna handed out two bags filled with sandwiches, takeout containers of coleslaw and rice pudding, a nice bottle of white wine, and a faded olive-green blanket. They’d stopped at a little place in a strip mall incongruously called the Epicurean Café, and it had lived up to its name. According to the newspaper reviews tacked up inside, the owner, a well-known French chef, had wanted out of the rat race of competitive big-city restaurants and had retired to the countryside, where he still cooked as if he were in a five-star establishment.

  “I don’t see any tables.” Jenna made a three-sixty. Nothing but more trees.

  “This way.” Gard held out her hand and Jenna took it as if it were the most natural thing in the world for her to do. The calluses on Gard’s palm rubbed lightly against hers, and the little bit of friction was as exciting as a kiss. She wasn’t certain how she was going to get through a picnic when she couldn’t think of anything except Gard touching her, caressing her, filling her.

  “Jenna,” Gard said in a dangerous tone.

  “Sorry. Sorry.” Gard led her to a second trail that hadn’t been immediately visible—a rocky, pine-needle-covered path just wide enough for two people to walk abreast. Almost immediately they started to climb, and she was happy for the purchase of her new boots. Sneakers would not have been sturdy enough. “How can you tell the second I get turned on?”

  “Your mouth gets soft,” Gard murmured. “Your lips darken a shade and you swallow a little bit, as if waiting for me to slip inside.”

  Jenna caught her breath. “You can’t know what you do to me.”

  “Oh, I know.” Gard’s voice was rough, frustrated. “Because you do the same to me. I feel like I’m going to explode.”

  “Good. I hate to suffer alone.”

  Gard laughed. “You have nothing to worry about, then.”

  After ten minutes of vigorous uphill hiking, the trail dwindled into a twisting, brush-encroached path. Jenna was about to ask if Gard really knew where she was going when all of a sudden the forest opened up into a small grassy clearing on the edge of the mountain. The deep green carpet of grass was dotted with granite boulders that resembled blocks tossed down by a bored child. Below them stretched a valley completely untouched by human habitation. Mist swirled from its depths and floated on the air like the breath of lovers on a cool fall night.

  “God, it’s so beautiful.” Jenna glanced at Gard who was looking at her, her eyes dark storm clouds. “What?”

  “It’s all I can do to keep my hands off you.”

  “Then let’s distract you for a while.”

  “Why?” Gard’s voice was gravelly, her mouth a tight line.

  Jenna smiled. “Because I like waiting. I like feeling you want me.”

  “Jesus.”

  “Come on.” Jenna spread out the blanket and stretched out on her side, propping her head up in the palm of her hand. “Bring the food down here.”

  Gard knelt and put the bags next to the blanket. She found the corkscrew and opened the wine. Handing Jenna the package of plastic cups, she said, “Would you?”

  Jenna got out two and held them while Gard poured the white Burgundy. They toasted each other and drank. Jenna loved the way Gard’s eyes never left her face. When she skimmed the tip of her tongue over her lips, catching the last drops of wine, Gard’s gaze followed. Jenna leaned forward and kissed her, but drew away before Gard could hold her in place.

  “Sandwiches?”

  Gard stared at her for long seconds and Jenna wondered if Gard’s tight reins were finally going to snap. She thrilled at making her lose control. She was still in control, and that was good. Essential.

  Gard removed the wax paper from one of the sandwiches and spread it out between them. She picked up half and held it out to Jenna. “Bite.”

  Jenna wet her lips again, watching Gard’s eyes narrow dangerously, and, getting to her knees, took a corner of the sandwich into her mouth. She slowly bit down and tugged off a small section. She chewed, murmured her approval. Took another bite. After she swallowed, she said, “Now you.”

  Gard ate a little and brushed the back of her hand over her mouth. Her fingers trembled and Jenna throbbed.

  “Coleslaw?” Jenna asked. Her voice was husky.

  Grinning, Gard found the container and took the top off. She set it down, hunted some more, and came up with a plastic fork. She dug into the slaw and held out the fork. “Open.”

  Jenna stuck out her tongue and laughed when a strand of cabbage dropped into her lap. She licked the tart sauce off her lip, took the plastic container, and fed some to Gard.

  They took turns feeding each other. When they were done, Jenna grabbed Gard’s wrist and slowly licked her fingers, one after the other, twirling her tongue around the tips, sucking lightly. By the time she got to Gard’s thumb and rolled her tongue over the pad, Gard’s jaw was so tight it looked as if it might shatter.

  “More wine?” Jenna asked.

  “I’m good. I’m driving.”

  Jenna bit lightly and when Gard grunted—her expression flickering between intense arousal and something close to pain—Jenna got terribly wet. She was losing control of her own game and quickly drew back, willing her body to calm.

  “Maybe we should get back,” Jenna said. “Your office—”

  “I called while you were trying on clothes,” Gard said. “I didn’t have anything critical. My vet tech is handling things.”

  “So you’re free.”

  Gard nodded. “Completely.”

  Jenna edged closer on the blanket until her knees touched Gard’s and draped her arms over Gard’s shoulders. She kissed her, light and quick. Her breasts brushed against Gard’s and she tightened everywhere. “How likely are we to be disturbed?”

  “This time of day, middle of the week? Way out here? Not likely.” Gard caressed Jenna’s sides, her thumbs brushing along the outer edges of Jenna’s breasts.

  “Getting naked is probably not a good idea, though.”

  Gard smiled. “Not recommended.”

  “We should probably go, then. Because I want you to get me naked.”

  “Is that right?” Gard slid her hand around Jenna’s nape and clasped her firmly, drawing her closer until their mouths met. She kissed her as if she were still hungry, exploring the inside of her mouth with long, probing strokes, cradling Jenna’s breast in her other hand, her thumb sliding back and forth over her nipple.

  Jenna’s thighs softened and she leaned into Gard, not caring any longer who led and who followed. All she wanted was more. More of Gard touching her, kissing her, setting her on fire. She moaned and caressed Gard’s shoulders through her shirt, and it wasn’t enough. She yanked up on the shirt and drove a hand underneath, finding her skin, massaging the hard muscles of her back. Gard held her captive with one hand gripping her neck, the other roaming over her body, squeezing her ass, caressing her breasts, stroking her stomach. Still she needed more. She needed to be naked. She needed Gard everywhere, over her and inside her.

  Jenna pulled back, gasping. “Oh God. Bad idea. Bad idea.”

  “Oh no. Very go
od idea. Amazing.” Gard slid her mouth down Jenna’s throat and licked the moisture that had pooled in the hollow. She expected salt but got clear cool water. She raised her head and felt raindrops on her face. The sun shone brightly overhead as a summer shower descended on them. “We’re going to get drenched.”

  Laughing, Jenna fisted her hands in Gard’s hair. “I don’t care.”

  Gard kissed her again, the heat of Jenna’s mouth a searing counterpoint to the rain soaking her. She teased Jenna’s damp shirt free of her jeans, dancing her fingertips over the slick, smooth skin of her lower back. Jenna’s hands roamed under her shirt. Nails etched lines of fire over her skin, teeth nibbled at her lip. She blinked water from her eyes and focused on the blue sky between the mountaintops. “Jenna. Look.”

  “Oh God, don’t stop kissing me,” Jenna moaned.

  “Wait.” Taking Jenna’s shoulders in both hands, Gard turned her on the blanket until Jenna’s back was against her chest. A huge double rainbow arched over the mountains, sparkling in crystal hues. Jenna’s head fell back against her shoulder, her hands restless on Gard’s thighs.

  “It’s beautiful.”

  “Yes.” Gard held Jenna close with one arm wrapped around her middle and opened the top buttons of Jenna’s shirt. She slipped her hand inside and cradled Jenna’s breast beneath the flimsy, damp material of her bra. Jenna’s nipple was a hard stone against her palm. She squeezed lightly and Jenna rolled her head on her shoulder, whimpering softly. She put her mouth against Jenna’s ear. “You like that.”