Wayward Hearts

by Susan Anne Mason

  Maxi drew in a deep breath, focusing her thoughts on another, more personal fraud she needed to deal with.

  Fifteen more minutes passed, and she was about to give up her vigil when Gloria’s BMW finally pulled into the long driveway. She screeched to a halt and got out with a swing of her long, blonde hair. Humming off-key, Gloria grabbed her purse and bags from the backseat and practically skipped up the stairs to the front door, her yellow skirt blowing out behind her. Maxi waited, motionless, while the woman fumbled with her keys to unlock the ornate front door. When Gloria bent to retrieve her packages, Maxi rose on silent feet, stuck her hands into her pockets, and stepped out of the shadows.

  “Hello, Gloria.”

  The other woman gave a squawk of surprise and dropped one of her shopping bags. Her startled expression twisted into one of extreme displeasure. “You’re trespassing on private property.”

  Maxi chose to ignore the remark. “I have a few things I need to say to you. I’d appreciate five minutes of your time.” How did she manage to sound so civilized when her insides rolled with a mixture of nerves and anger?

  Gloria stepped away from the door and set the rest of her belongings on one of the wicker chairs. She straightened and crossed her arms over her chest. “I take it you’re not here to congratulate me.”

  “Not quite.”

  “I didn’t think so. Jason and I are expecting a baby and getting married in less than two weeks’ time. Nothing you do can change that, so go ahead. Say what you have to.”

  Maxi’s stomach clenched as though someone had punched her. Hearing Gloria say it out loud felt like someone had rubbed vinegar into the raw wound of Maxi’s heart. She took a deep breath and blew it out. “You’ve always been a bully, Gloria. All through high school, I suffered through your cruel jokes, your lies, and harassment. I guess I was as much to blame for keeping the game going. Until you did the meanest thing of all.” Maxi’s voice cracked. She stopped to shore her courage again. She would not break down in front of Gloria, no matter what it took.

  Gloria at least had the grace to look embarrassed.

  “Your article in the school newspaper was unforgivable. At the time, I was too grief stricken to do anything about it. Maybe I even believed it somewhere deep down. It’s taken me years to forgive myself for that night, and now that I have, I want to tell you what a lowlife you were to print those lies about my brother’s death.”

  Maxi had the brief satisfaction to watch Gloria pale beneath her fake tan.

  “Is this all you want to do? Dredge up the past? I haven’t got time for this.” She made a move to open the door.

  Maxi stepped in front of her, blocking her way.

  “I’m not finished yet.” She met Gloria’s furious glare with a steely gaze of her own. “All those so called ‘pranks’ pale in comparison to what you’re doing now to Jason.”

  Gloria’s mouth fell open. “What I’m doing to him? He got me pregnant, and somehow I’m the villain?”

  She was a good actress, Maxi had to give her that. Playing the outraged victim to the hilt. “You can drop the act with me. You may have Jason fooled, but I’d bet my entire savings account you’re not pregnant at all. Or if you are, it’s not Jason’s baby.”

  Fear leapt into the other woman’s eyes. “You can’t prove any of that,” Gloria sputtered. She pushed Maxi aside and went to grasp the door handle.

  “You’re right. I can’t prove anything. That doesn’t change the truth though. And the truth will come out eventually. It always does. I just hope you care enough about Jason not to ruin his life in the process.”

  For a moment, Maxi let herself feel the rage she’d kept under such tight control. She grabbed Gloria by the upper arm and jerked her around. “I’ll be watching you. And if you hurt Jason, you’ll regret it. That’s a promise.”

  They stood nose-to-nose, anger and hatred mixing in the air between them. Maxi fought the urge to smack the lipstick off Gloria’s smug lips. In an effort to regain control, she took one long step back.

  “What’s going on here?”

  The loud masculine voice made her jump. Jason stood at the foot of the stairs, a thunderous expression darkening his face. How had she not noticed him arriving? Heat rushed into Maxi’s cheeks, blood pounding in her ears. She wished the floorboards on the porch would part and swallow her. She hadn’t wanted Jason to know she was back in town, let alone overhear part of her conversation with Gloria. Retreat became her only option. With one quick motion, she jumped off the porch to the grass below.

  “Ask her.” She jerked her head in Gloria’s direction. “I’m sure she’d be more than happy to tell you all about it.”

  In two strides, Jason caught up to Maxi and grabbed her arm, halting her departure. “What are you doing here? I thought you were in New York.”

  She could smell the fresh scent of his soap, feel the warmth of his breath on her face. She struggled to maintain her composure and not throw herself into his arms. “I finished sooner than I expected and came back to help Mama finalize the sale of the house.” An evil urge took hold. “Tell me, does your future wife know she’ll be living on my farm?”

  The shocked expression on his face told her exactly what she needed to know.

  He ignored the question as she guessed he would. “Stay out of this, Max. It doesn’t concern you.”

  The harshness of his tone tore a strip off her already bleeding heart. “You’re right. I am so done with this whole situation. You can save yourself a stamp, and don’t bother mailing me an invitation to the wedding.”

  She ripped her arm out of his grasp and took off at a run.

  26

  Jason ground his molars together and watched Maxi fly down the sidewalk. The sight of her on Gloria’s porch, locked in a heated debate with his soon-to-be wife, had shocked him. He thought Maxi would be in the city for a few more days at least.

  Jason turned and mounted the stairs to stand before Gloria, wishing he could turn around and go back the way he came. Because she clearly wasn’t going to forget a word Maxi had said.

  Sure enough, Gloria crossed her arms over her chest and frowned. “What did she mean by that comment?”

  He feigned ignorance. “What comment?”

  “About living on a farm? You don’t live on a farm. You live with your mother.”

  This was not going well. He didn’t want to fight with her right now. “That’s right. But we’ll find somewhere to live as soon as possible.”

  Her rigid stance relaxed a fraction. “Good. I’ve got a few ideas I want to run by you. There’s this cute house on Greenmount Avenue—”

  “We won’t be buying a house.” They’d be fixing up a farmhouse. He needed the right time to break that one to her.

  She scowled, clearly not happy with the idea. He scanned the house behind him and realized anywhere they did live would be a big come down for her.

  “I came by to discuss the wedding date.”

  She brightened at the change in topic. “Oh, good. I talked to Father Marcus at St. Peter’s Church. After my father pulled a few strings, he’s willing to marry us next Saturday. That should be enough time to get the bridesmaid dresses and the tuxedos—”

  Panic grabbed his throat in a chokehold. “Whoa. Whoa. Wait a minute. Who said anything about a church wedding with tuxedos? City Hall will do fine.”

  An expression of horror flew over Gloria’s face. “Daddy will not allow anything less than a church wedding. Our marriage has to be sanctified by God.”

  Nausea curdled in Jason’s stomach. He wasn’t getting married in the church with all the trappings. They’d have a simple wedding. Maybe Nick would marry them quietly with only a couple of witnesses.

  Gloria planted her hands on her hips and stamped her foot. “I want a big church wedding.”

  Jason recoiled at her spoiled behavior. How would he live with her on a day-to-day basis? He took a deep breath and forced himself to think about the only thing that mattered in this situatio
n. Forging a relationship for the sake of the innocent one they were bringing into the world. “I’ll talk to Nick and see if he’ll agree to perform a simple ceremony in his church.”

  A storm of emotions crossed her makeup-caked face. She looked like a petulant child unable to comprehend that she wouldn’t get her own way. “I could take the baby away and never let you see him.”

  Jason whirled on her so fast she gasped. His fingers circled her arm in a steely grip. “I would never let you get away with that. I’d hunt you down to the ends of the earth if I had to.” Anger had him shaking. He could see fear in Gloria’s eyes and felt a twinge of regret.

  “OK, fine. We’ll do it your way. For now.” She pulled her arm away and gave him a scathing look before disappearing through the front door.

  He watched her go and then turned and slammed his fist against the portico.

  ****

  What on earth had she been thinking confronting Gloria that way? Once again she’d come out looking like the shrew and Gloria, the victim.

  Maxi gunned the accelerator allowing her self-loathing to express itself through her lead foot. The sight of the local police station brought a splash of cold water to her hot head, and she eased off the gas, mindful she was still within town limits. Running into Jason at Gloria’s had unnerved her more than she cared to admit. She needed time to recover her equilibrium before facing her mother and Peg. She decided to head over to the farm to cool down and start packing.

  Her tortured thoughts turned to Peg. How was she handling the news that Jason would be marrying Gloria? Maxi doubted she’d take it well. She bit her lip recalling the burgeoning hope on the two mothers’ faces as she’d left for the airport and shook her head at how fast the world could change. How hopes and dreams could die in the breath of a word.

  The farm seemed desolate as Maxi drove up and parked in front of the house. She took a moment to study her home, the dormer windows upstairs, the friendly wrap-around porch, the lonely window boxes full of her mother’s wilting petunias. Even in its neglected condition, Maxi loved the old house. Why was it when she was finally getting rid of this place that her heart squeezed with sadness at leaving it behind?

  She swallowed the lump in her throat. No time for silly sentimentality. She had work to do.

  With fierce determination, she jogged down to the basement and dug out the stash of old cardboard boxes her mother always kept there just in case they needed them someday.

  She hauled a stack up to the kitchen, deciding this was the best room to start in. Her bedroom had nothing left except the dismantled bed frame. The two spare rooms contained only a few pieces of furniture. So the main floor became the area to tackle.

  She grabbed a stack of old newspapers from the basket by the fireplace and began to wrap dishes. She placed each item in the box with care, forcing herself to concentrate on the task at hand and not let her mind wander to self-pitying thoughts. Halfway through the second box, a knock sounded on the front door. Maxi jumped and almost dropped her mother’s favorite casserole dish. Her heart rushed into her throat, half-hoping, half-dreading that Jason had found her.

  She leaned over the kitchen sink to peer out the window. The sight of Nick on the front porch made the air whoosh out of her like a deflated balloon.

  The front door creaked open. “Anyone home?”

  “In the kitchen,” she managed to call. She took a deep breath to settle her system before turning to give her friend what she hoped was a convincing smile. “What are you doing here?”

  Nick paused to lean against the doorjamb and gave a sheepish shrug. “Jason called. He was worried about you after the incident at the Johnsons’ place. Wanted me to make sure you were OK.”

  Maxi groaned and tore a sheet of newspaper, getting perverse pleasure from the loud tearing sound. “I suppose half the town knows about our fight by now. Don’t people around here have anything better to do?”

  “Apparently not.”

  She slammed some plastic containers into the box.

  Nick came into the room and picked up a carton. “How ’bout I give you a hand here, and if you feel the urge to vent, my ears are available.” He picked up a glass and wrapped it in newsprint.

  Maxi continued to shred sheets of paper, finding a small measure of satisfaction in the destructive action. “I guess you’ve heard. About Jason and Gloria, I mean.” She presumed everyone in town knew by now.

  Nick nodded, his sympathetic blue eyes on her. “Yeah. I’m so sorry. Lily’s all torn up about it, too. By the way, your presence is required at our house tonight. My wife won’t take no for an answer.”

  Sudden tears stung the back of Maxi’s throat. Tears of gratitude for friends like Nick and Lily. “Thanks. I don’t think I could face staying at the Hanleys’ tonight.” She folded the flaps down on a full carton and set it aside.

  Nick packed in silence for several moments. Maxi knew he must be dying to ask her questions, but he held back, waiting for her to begin. She loved him for that.

  “Jason and I were getting along so great,” she said at last. “I really thought he was starting to have feelings for me—as more than a friend, I mean. We even went on a real date. Then he blindsided me with this engagement.” She stood back from the table to look at Nick. “I just don’t see why he has to marry her.”

  Nick deposited a wrapped item into the box. “It’s the honorable thing to do. And Jason is an honorable guy.”

  Maxi flung out her arms. “But it’s wrong on so many levels. I confronted Gloria, Nick. I saw the truth in her face. She’s lying to Jason. Of course, he shouldn’t have slept with her, but she’s going to make him pay for it for the rest of his life. This lie will turn Jason’s world upside down. This honorable man will be stuck in a loveless marriage built on mistruth.” Was she the only one who could see the reality of the situation? “Doesn’t he understand he’ll never be happy, and the child will suffer because of it?”

  “He can’t see it because of his own childhood.” Nick’s voice was gentle. “He’ll have to come to that realization in his own time.”

  “There is no time. He’s getting married next week.” The finality of the statement tore away the last piece of the shield she’d placed over her heart. A rush of sorrow and loss raced through her torso. She turned away from Nick’s gaze to reach blindly for a glass bowl on the counter. It slipped from her fingers and shattered into a thousand pieces on the kitchen floor. She stood paralyzed amid the debris. “I’ve made such a mess.”

  Nick steadied her with warm hands on her shoulders. “It’s all right. I’ll get a broom.”

  “My life is as broken as that bowl.” Fat tears she’d tried so hard to repress rolled down her cheeks. Tremors seized her body, and she began to sway.

  In one swift movement, Nick lifted her into his arms and stepped over the shards of glass. He carried her to the living room and sat her gently on the sofa beside him.

  “It’s going to be OK.”

  Taking advantage of the comfort he offered, she buried her face into his shoulder and let go of all the grief inside her. She’d lost Drew, her father, and now, in every real sense, she’d lost Jason, too. Nick said nothing but held her until the tears subsided.

  “Does God hate me, Nick?” she whispered at last. “Is that why everything goes wrong in my life?”

  He handed her a tissue to blow her nose. “God doesn’t hate you, Maxi.”

  She finished wiping her face and shook her head.

  “Maxi, I’ve known you a long time, and I’ve seen a pattern with you over the years. Subconsciously, you don’t see yourself as worthy of happiness. Your guilt over Drew’s death has colored everything in your life with a tainted brush.”

  She frowned, twisting the tissue in her hands. “That could be true.” She gave a huge sigh. “I don’t understand why he had to die, Nick. Why did God take Drew from us? What did we do to deserve that?”

  Nick’s arm tightened around her shoulders. “I don’t believe God wor
ks that way.” His voice was soft. “All kinds of bad things happen in life. Wars, sickness, accidents…God doesn’t cause them, but He does help us get through them.”

  They sat in silence for a moment. “You’ve been angry at yourself—and at God—for a very long time now. Do you think you can forgive not only yourself, but God, too?”

  The truth of his words jarred her. “I don’t know how.” She pushed off the sofa and paced to the fireplace where she stood looking at the urn containing her father’s remains. “I’ve been so angry lately, Nick.” She ran a finger over the etchings on the pewter container. “So angry I almost attacked two women who betrayed me. That’s not how I want to see myself.”

  “How do you want others to see you?”

  The sudden image of Dora Lee came to mind. She wanted to be the person Dora Lee believed she was. “Someone people can look up to and respect.”

  Nick rose and came to stand beside her. “You’re all that and more. Lily and I have chosen you to be Annabelle’s godmother, because you’re the type of person we’d like our daughter to emulate. We believe in you. Now it’s up to you to believe in yourself. And how you choose to react to the bad circumstances in your life determines who you are.”

  The sincerity of his words reached into her soul and touched the truth within her.

  “How do you choose to react to this, Maxi?”

  Nick was right. She’d been reacting badly to both of the unfair situations in her life. Like a shrew, spewing anger and hatred in her wake. She bit her lip and then raised her eyes to meet his gentle regard. “I choose to rise above it. Not sink down to their level.”

  Nick smiled. “Good choice.”

  Maxi felt a weight lifting. “I told Jason he was making the wrong choice. But I’m doing the same thing. I need to make better decisions in my life. Follow God’s plan for me.”