The Truth About Toby

by Cheryl St. John

She didn’t remember him coming to bed the night before, and when she’d awakened he’d been gone. “You okay?”

  “Yeah.”

  She sat facing him on the sofa. “I know you’re getting antsy to go home.”

  “It won’t be long now,” he replied without looking at her.

  Inevitable. They both knew it. They’d never made any plans together, never spoken of a future beyond finding Toby. Shaine didn’t know how to have a casual affair.

  She studied his profile. She didn’t know how to share what she’d shared with him, how to form an emotional and physical bond and then just sever it. He was obviously used to the process. He didn’t make attachments. The thought angered her, but she tamped it down. She’d better learn fast.

  “Ken called.”

  She focused her attention on his words. “What did he say?”

  “They’ve confirmed the place I saw. It’s east of Tucson, between a couple of mountain ranges, isolated. A couple in their forties going by the name of Holbrook keeps the kids until money is transferred and then they deliver them.”

  “That’s awful.”

  “Altogether, they figure there are about eight people involved in the operation.”

  “What are they going to do?”

  “They need another day or so. There are a couple of kids there right now, and they plan to follow the Holbrooks and catch them in the act of transferring.”

  “Selling,” Shaine corrected.

  “Yeah.”

  “Then what?”

  Austin turned and looked at her. “Well, caught redhanded, they’ll have to start talking unless they want to go down alone.”

  Everything about her seemed weary. He hated the toll this ordeal was taking on her.

  “This is so unbelievable,” she said. “It’s like something you see on ‘America’s Most Wanted.’ If I didn’t know what they’d done to Maggie and Toby, I wouldn’t believe it. I feel like I’ve been having one big long nightmare for the past year.”

  Austin aimed the remote at the screen and flicked off the game. “Come here.”

  She leaned forward until her head touched his chest, and he smoothed her silky hair, holding her head against his chest, wishing he could impart comfort and strength through that simple touch.

  He wished he’d been able to do more. He despised the familiar helplessness that swamped him when situations were out of his control. “I know something that’ll cheer you up,” he said.

  She lifted her head. “What’s that?”

  He picked up the remote he’d found in an electronics store that day.

  “Where’d that come from?”

  “I bought it.” He aimed it at her stereo. The first chords of Little Eva’s “The Loco-motion” filled the room. She didn’t have a disk player, but he’d found a couple of tapes to liven the place up.

  She grinned. “There are customers two floors above us who paid to spend the night in the 1800s.”

  He turned the volume down. “They could have spent the same money and had this great toy. Look, it works on the TV, the stereo. I’ll bet I could get it to turn on the coffeemaker.”

  She laughed out loud. “You’re right. It cheered me up.”

  Relieved to see her mood lighten, he sat up straight. “Want to go out? A movie maybe?”

  Shaine glanced at Austin’s expression, knowing he’d suggested it only for her. “We should stay near the phone.”

  “No problem.” He stood, picked up something from the counter that divided the rooms, flipped it open and showed it to her.

  “A phone?”

  “Yep.”

  She grinned. “Okay.”

  He headed for the bedroom. “I’ll change clothes. It’s getting almost as cold here as it was in the mountains.”

  In the background, the softly playing music ended. Things had changed between them. Shaine couldn’t put her finger on the exact time or place it had happened, but it had. He was still the same person who’d gone out of his way to comfort and help her. He was still the same man whose touch turned her insides to jelly, but whose voice calmed her fears and made her heart pound for different reasons.

  He was still Austin Allen, a man who knew and saw more than most people would in their entire lives. And though he was going along with this business for her sake, she would soon become one of the things he turned off, closed out, refused to see.

  She’d bet anything that he wouldn’t come to her bed that night. Or any night again.

  She was going to have to learn to tune out things, too.

  “Seen Austin?” Shaine asked Marge, sliding a pan of bread pudding into the oven.

  “Saw him carrying boxes into your office,” the woman replied.

  Shaine crossed the wood-floored dining room. Outside the room that served as her workspace, several large boxes and their packing materials were stacked against the wall.

  “What are these?” she asked, entering.

  “I’ll get those in a minute.” He looked up from a computer.

  “Austin!”

  “Look at this. I’ve loaded everything you’re going to need to keep your records. This will make your work so much easier. Wait till you see.”

  She stood beside him and gestured helplessly with both hands. “Austin, what are you doing? Where did this come from?”

  “I picked it up today. I thought it would be great for your business. You can use this program to keep your checking account. You can even pay your bills with it. It’ll transfer money from your account and keep the balance.”

  “If I had the money it took to buy this, I would have had some chimney work done so we can use the fireplace in the dining room this winter. That was next in our budget plans. With all the recent travel, I can’t pay for this.”

  His hand paused on the mouse, and he glanced up at her. “I bought it. Don’t worry about it.”

  “Don’t worry about it? These things cost a couple thousand dollars. I know that much.”

  “It’s no big deal, Shaine. I bought it. I wanted to buy it. Enough about that, all right?”

  “No, it’s not all right. You should have asked me.”

  He looked away, the enthusiasm gone from his expression.

  Minutes ticked past. The room held the unfamiliar smell of the new equipment. Shaine glanced from his face to the screen, and couldn’t help a little curiosity about what he’d wanted her to see.

  “I’m sorry,” he said finally. “You’re right. I should have asked before I brought it in.”

  “I can’t afford it,” she said lamely. “And I can’t accept such an expensive gift.”

  He turned and took stock of her expression. “Why not?” She looked into his flint-colored eyes. Confusion littered her thoughts. What was happening? What did he expect of her? Things between them had deteriorated to the point where she didn’t know how to act or what to say. He’d gone out often the last two days and fallen asleep on the sofa at night. And now he brought her a computer worth as much or more than she made in a month.

  She ran a hand through her hair and turned away, stepping to the window and idly looking out into the side yard. “Because it’s too much. You’ve given me enough already. There’s so much I can’t repay.”

  “I don’t want to be repaid.”

  “But this—” she gestured limply “—this isn’t the kind of gift friends give one another.”

  The word friends hung in the room like an accusation, and that hadn’t been how she’d meant it. She’d meant that an expensive gift intimated more of a commitment than they shared. When placed beside his emotional and physical withdrawal, his generosity bewildered her.

  “I’ve never had friends, so I don’t know what they give one another,” he said, his measured voice possessing a tightness that brought an unwanted lump to her throat. “I have no family, either. I have more money than I can spend on myself, and I didn’t see anything earth-shattering about spending a little on someone I—care for.”

  His matter-of-fa
ct tone fell flat.

  Shaine closed her eyes and tried to assimilate his words with the way he’d been behaving. To him, it really was no big deal. To him, everything they’d had together was no big deal. She resented that, and she hated herself for her irritable attitude.

  She’d barged into his life and demanded he teach her to understand her dreams so that she could find Toby. He’d done the best he could, and once they’d discovered she couldn’t do it fast enough on her own, he’d made a sacrifice for her. How could she take more than that? She already owed him so much.

  And a computer, something so symbolic of Austin, would be a hurtful reminder after he was gone.

  Shaine bit her lip. Was that it? Was that really it? Or was the real issue the fact that she didn’t want material things from him? She wanted more. She wanted him, and that was something that wasn’t so easy for him to bestow.

  She wasn’t just being foolish, was she? He’d just admitted his lack of friends and family to shower with gifts.

  That admission made her wonder about something he’d never told her, and a change of subject suited her. “How did your mother die, Austin?”

  He hesitated. “A car wreck,” he said finally.

  “How old were you?”

  “Eighteen.”

  “That’s tough.”

  “Yeah. She and a friend were both killed.”

  She turned back to the room. “There’s something you’re not saying, isn’t there? I can hear it.”

  His subdued voice was unfamiliar. “I knew the exact hour she would be pronounced dead. I knew the description of her injuries.”

  Shaine walked back and leaned against the old desk. “That must have been terrible for you.”

  He clicked the mouse a couple of times and turned off the power. “What I couldn’t see was the day. It could have been far into the future or the next day—I didn’t know.”

  “How did you get the vision?”

  He met her eyes. “In a dream.”

  Her heart caught in her throat. He’d hinted at precognitive dreams like hers, but he’d never shared any of them with her. She understood the terror of that particular vision.

  “At first I wouldn’t let her go anywhere. I was terrified of what I knew was going to happen. But that’s illogical, of course. Everyone is destined to die eventually. I had no date or exact place. If I’d known it would happen in a certain city, I’d have kept her from there, but it wasn’t like that.”

  “Where did it happen?”

  “Pittsburgh. We had a town house there. She’d gotten tired of the isolation, and swore she’d be careful. And she was. It wasn’t her fault. A truck ran a red light.”

  “And then you only had Tom.”

  “Yes. I stayed with him and his wife for a while, and then I went to college. By then I was all the more determined that I didn’t want to see the past or the future. It was all out of my control, and I hated the powerlessness.”

  “You’ve done good for so many people, Austin.”

  “But at what expense? Sometimes it’s important to take care of yourself. That’s what I learned the hard way.”

  She placed her hand over his on the arm of the chair. “I do understand.”

  A pulsing low ring sounded nearby.

  Pulling his hand from beneath hers, he leaned forward and moved aside a pile of instruction booklets and CD Rom cases to pick up his phone. He flipped it open. “Allen here.”

  Shaine leaned back and listened to his side of the conversation.

  “Where at? Yeah. Did you tell ’em you had the car?... What about Rossi?... She’s okay. We’re both a little impatient... Yeah.” He hung up.

  “What’s happening?”

  “They have the Holbrooks in custody. Ken told them this Rossi person was ready to testify that they had pulled the jobs on their own.”

  “They found Rossi?”

  “Not yet. That’s just a tactic. It worked. The Holbrooks got a lawyer, and they’re about to spill their guts.”

  Chapter 16

  “Let’s go to Arizona,” Shaine suggested later that evening as they picked at their dinner in her tiny kitchen.

  “What for?”

  “Go to that Holbrook place. Look around, get a feel for the kids.”

  He understood her desire, but he’d dismissed the same idea. “Shaine, do you have any idea how many impressions would be in a place like that? It’s been a year since Toby and the Cutter baby were there. A dozen or a hundred kids could have come and gone. I’m sure they didn’t keep mementos of the children they hocked on the black market.”

  “Don’t say it like that!” She shivered. “That gives me visions of dark wharves and boats to China.”

  He shrugged.

  “I can’t stand this waiting!” She laid her fork down, giving up the pretense of eating. “I feel so helpless!”

  The dark smudges beneath her eyes said as much as her words. Austin, too, felt the strain of the last week. “How long do you have until Audrey has her baby?”

  She thought for a second. “Four days.”

  “We could make a trip to Kansas and back by then.”

  She examined his expression. “Kansas?”

  “Amy Cutter’s mother.”

  Her chin dropped. “What—do you think that would do any good?”

  “I don’t know. She might have something more we could use to go on. We’ve gone through all of Toby’s and Maggie’s things.”

  She shoved her chair back and stood. “Let’s go.”

  “Mind if I hook the modem up to your phone line long enough to check for flights?”

  She waved him off. “Go.”

  By eleven the next morning, Shaine looked almost green as they hurried off a windy runway toward the taxi stand. “I’ll never take another small-engine plane,” she swore.

  “It was a little rough,” he agreed.

  “A little? I lost tomorrow’s breakfast back there.”

  He grinned. “But I got you here fast, didn’t I?”

  They caught a cab and found the address. Samantha Cutter looked like the nineteen-year-old she was, with a section of her long straight auburn hair braided and hanging against her cheek. Having been expecting them, she opened the door and ushered them in. “Can I get you guys a Coke?” she asked.

  “No, thank you,” Shaine answered.

  “That sounds good,” Austin replied, knowing the girl would be more relaxed if he let her serve him.

  She brought him a glass of ice and a chilled can of soda, and their fingers brushed. Austin met her eyes, and something in his chest dipped and swayed. He knew this girl. He knew her anguish at the loss of her baby. He’d experienced her every emotion as if it were his own. An experience like that created an incomprehensible connection to another human being.

  And she didn’t know him from the man in the moon.

  “On the phone you said this was about Amy,” she said, her voice shaky. She had wide hazel eyes, and a full figure packed into jeans and a long T-shirt.

  “That’s right,” he returned.

  “One of the detectives I keep in touch with said they’re checking out a new lead, and then a Detective McKade called me. Are you some of the FBI people?”

  Austin shook his head. “No. We’re working with Detective McKade, but actually, we’re looking for Shaine’s nephew. He’s been missing since the day after Amy disappeared.”

  “Really? Is the FBI handling your case?”

  “They are now.” He exchanged a look with Shaine. How would this girl take the truth? He decided to tell her straight out. “We’ve seen Amy:”

  Her face paled, and he realized he’d said it all wrong. “Not seen her, like seen her, but seen her, like in a vision.”

  It was a lame way to explain it, but the only way that someone who didn’t have the ability could understand. “The FBI had one of Amy’s shoes and Shaine and I held it.”

  “I saw a lady do that on ‘Montel,’” she said skeptically. “You mean yo
u guys can really see things like that?”

  Shaine broke into the conversation with “Sometimes we can. Austin has helped the agency find a lot of missing people. I’m a little newer at it.”

  “Well, what did you see?”

  “Austin saw the people who took her.”

  “He did?” Her eyes widened. “Is this the new lead they told me about?”

  “You should let the detective assigned to Amy’s case tell you the details,” Austin said. “I do know they’re getting close to pressing charges.”

  She nodded blankly.

  “And Shaine here saw Amy as she is now or as she will be.”

  Austin could tell the teen wanted to believe with all her heart, but he knew, too, that a lot of quacks approached police and family members when a case like this hit the press. “And where was she?” she asked.

  “I don’t know,” Shaine admitted. “But she’s all right.”

  The girl’s eyes expressed her emotions wavering between hope and skepticism. “My mother would have a fit if she knew I was even talking to you guys,” she said. “She blames me for Amy being missing. She always said I wouldn’t be able to take care of her.”

  Anger welled up in Shaine’s chest, and she reached for the girl’s hand. “What happened was not because you weren’t a good mother, Samantha. These people are monsters. They select the children before they take them. They murdered my sister to get to my nephew.”

  Samantha’s hazel eyes rounded in sympathy. “Well, tell me,” she said after a few minutes. “Tell me what both of you saw.”

  They took a few minutes to explain the difference in their perceptions and then the visions themselves.

  “Walking?” she said to Shaine, with tears welling in her eyes. “She’s walking? Yes, she’s so much older now. I’ve missed so much. I miss her so bad.”

  “We didn’t come here to upset you,” Austin interrupted.

  The girl visibly composed herself.

  “We were hoping maybe you had something else of Amy’s,” Shaine said, trying to keep the meeting focused and wanting to spare the girl as much unpleasantness as possible. “Something we could use to—get another look.”

  “You mean something that belonged to her? Like a toy? Clothes?”