Caged (Caged series Book 1)

by Destiny Hawkins

“Yeah, I heard him,” I looked down at my fists. They had a few spots of blood on them, but they weren’t bad. The most I did to Jessie was bust her lip.

  Abigale saw my hands and wiped them clean, then she nodded for Cameron to leave the room. The party was only halfway through and a small fight wasn’t going to shut it down.

  “Rose, what did she say?” Abigale asked. She gave me a worried look, “Jessie is known for saying things to set people off. It’s just what she does.”

  I sighed as I thought back to how she almost gave me away. She had almost told my secret, and Lorena already felt as if I had something to hide, but probably didn’t think it was as bad as it is.

  “She’s going to take everything away,” I said out loud.

  Abigale already knew what I meant. She knew what it was like to make a fresh start, and to feel like all her hard work was being taken away, “Jessie did the same thing to me before. I’m not going to get into it, but you just have to ignore her.”

  I wanted to yell that I tried that, but I knew she was just trying to give me advice.

  “You just got on the wrestling team -”

  “I’m pretty sure what I did is a lot worse than whatever you did,” I said boldly, “So keeping calm and ignoring someone who threatens my chance at a new life may be a lot harder than it was for you.”

  Abigale became pale. The look on her face was similar to mine when I would have flashbacks. Slowly she smiled to cover up her shock, “Or, whatever we may have done could be the equal amount of bad,” she looked me in the eye holding the same slight smile. Her eyes were telling me that we weren’t as different as I thought, and that she understood what I was going through, “Jessie wouldn’t be the one taking everything away from you, it would be you. Don’t let yourself fall into her trap. You’re right, she is trouble.” The color slowly started to make it back to her face and she stood up, “Well, I’m going to go back down and take a few shots,” she chuckled. “That intense moment called for a few.”

  Now I felt bad. Abigale understood me since the first day that she had met me, and this whole time I thought that she didn’t really get me.

  “You coming?” Abigale said by the door.

  I shook my head no, “I think I’m done for the night.”

  “You sure? I mean, I could get you something to help you relax.”

  I smiled at that, “No, I think I’ll just go to sleep. It’s been a long day.”

  “OK, but if you change your mind, I’ll be chugging downstairs,” Abigale opened the door and left the room.

  I lied down on the soft bed and looked up at the ceiling. What was I going to do now? Just play the fight off as though it didn’t happen? I guess that was all I could do, but wait a minute....where did she learn to move like that? Jessie was fast. At first I thought that it was just luck that she was able to dodge me, but that was skill. I saw form in her movement, and it didn’t really add up to the end of the fight. It was as if she let me beat her down. And what did she mean by them? I know now that she knew what happened in California, but them? She spoke as if she actually spoke to someone that knew me.

  I took a deep breath and let myself fall asleep.

  * * *

  Windred crashed down into the mud and laid there in the heavy rain. I stood only a few feet away and watched her. She was in pain, and I was the one causing it.

  I didn’t want to hurt her anymore, so I just stood there and waited for orders. I hoped that we were finished now, and that the punishment was over, but it wasn’t. Arnold wasn’t satisfied and he needed to see more to be sure that Winee would never try and run away again.

  This was all my fault. I regretted running after her and preventing her from getting away. She begged me to come with her, but I just couldn’t leave. At that very moment, all I wanted to do was run away and leave it all behind. I no longer wanted Arnold’s approval, and I no longer felt like he would change. We were just his trained dogs, and nothing more.

  Winee looked up at me, but didn’t say anything. She wasn’t crying, and she didn’t look afraid. She looked angry.

  When she got back to her feet I stepped back and waited for her to attack me. I knew that she would fight back because she was a lot stronger than she used to be. Mentally and physically. The only issue now is that Arnold had hurt her leg earlier, and she couldn’t put much weight on it, so her fighting ability was limited.

  “Winee....” I said breathing heavily. I had never seen her look at me with such dark eyes. It was almost frightening for someone that always looked so happy.

  Winee limped towards me and splashed with each step. I looked from her to Arnold, who was also getting soaked in the rain. He was giving the same look that Winee gave me, and it felt like they were both against me.

  “Don’t,” I said to Winee, but she didn’t stop coming after me. I didn’t want to hurt her anymore...

  I took two hard blows to the face and stumbled backwards, then I was tackled to the ground and guarded myself as Winee attacked. Her punches were hard and filled with hate. I guess after so long of being Arnold’s pet, you become hard, because I was shown no mercy.

  The tears that I was trying to fight started to flow, and it made me afraid. I was glad that it was raining today so that Arnold couldn’t tell. The only person that could see my tears was the one causing them.

  “Get up, Rose!” Arnold yelled, “Get up!”

  I didn’t know what to do, but this wasn’t going to end until it was Winee that was down. It would all be better if I just ended this and the apologized to her later.

  I pushed Winee off of me and got back to my feet. She got back up just as fast as I did, and she attacked me again, “I hate you!”

  Those words struck like a knife. I slammed her down hard for the last time and was going to give her one last blow to put her to sleep, but she wasn’t moving. Her eyes were shut, and I saw that the small puddle next to her turned red.

  “Winee?” I got on my knees next to her. She blinked up at me a few times with a painful look on her face, and then she drifted off, “Winee?” Her glowing face went pale and she was just a lifeless body in the mud, “Wake up,” I shook her, but there was no sign of life.

  Arnold stood next to me, “Go to your room, Rose.”

  I looked up at Arnold with tears in my eyes, “Is she- Arnold you have to help her. Did I-”

  “Go to your room,” his tone didn’t change. He was still calm.

  I looked down at Winee’s body. I had killed her. Winee was dead because of me. My best friend was gone.....forever.

  * * *

  I woke up to see Winee looking down at me. She was holding both of my shoulders firmly, and when my eyes had adjusted I saw that it was actually Lorena

  We both were just looking at each other. Lorena, with a look of worry, and me with pained tears running down my cheeks. She didn’t say anything when I broke down crying. She just rubbed my hair back until I fell asleep again.

  Chapter 20

  News of the fight traveled around fast, and I wasn’t surprised when Miss Shy asked me about it. She kept giving me the same look that Lorena and Abigale have been giving me for the past couple of days, and I kept trying to convince her that I was okay, but It wasn’t working.

  “Did something happen, Rose?” Miss Shy asked before I left the room.

  “No,” I said not turning around, “it was just a fight. That’s all,” I lied that day. Something was wrong with me, but I didn’t know what, or how to explain it, and it’s not like Jessie was around to cause any more trouble. There were rumors going around that she’d been suspended for smoking on school grounds and wouldn’t be back for a while.

  The principal heard about the fight and called me into the office, but he looked uncomfortable while giving me a lecture and sent me back to class immediately. It was almost like I was hard to look at.

  My friends’ attitudes towards me were similar, but more supportive. Cameron was the main one trying to find ways to cheer me up, but he
kept failing, and I tried to cheer myself up plenty of times, but I couldn’t get those memories out of my mind. It was like after the fight with Jessie, all I could think about was the past. There was no point in living in reality anymore, because my memories and guilt would take over.

  I walked into Mrs. Pond’s class and froze at the door when I saw Windred sitting in Lorena’s seat. I took a step forward to get a better look at her, but then stopped when I noticed that Mrs. Pond had stopped teaching and gave me a confused look, along with the rest of the class.

  Lorena turned and saw what the commotion was about, but also looked confused, and now we were both staring at each other. If I could move then I would, but at that moment I felt frozen. This was the third time I saw my dead friend and it was starting to scare me.

  “Rose?” Mrs. Pond’s words were muffled.

  I clenched my shaking hands and backed out of the class room. It was really hot in there and I couldn’t breathe.

  “Rose?” Mrs. Pond sounded irritated, but then looked confused again. I turned to her, but didn’t speak, “Are you alrigh-”

  I walked away to the restroom and dropped everything on the floor. Once I was to the sink, I splashed cold water onto my face and tried to hold back my tears. Water had always helped before.

  I glared at my reflection, and then punched the glass as hard as I could. Winee was dead, and I had to accept that.

  “Rose?” I saw Abigale peek into the restroom, “Are you okay? I heard something.......”

  My hands were visibly shaking, like someone going through withdrawal and needed another fix.

  “Why does everyone keep asking if I’m okay!?” I snapped. Those tears were filling up with anger, “I’m fucking fine,” I left my things on the floor and charged out of the restroom. I was shocked by the heavy traffic in the hallway because I didn’t hear the bell ring for class to let out.

  I glanced back and saw Abigale holding my things, but I didn’t want to see that look on her face again, so I walked into the crowd and just tried to blend in.

  I went straight home after practice and was finally able to eat. I hadn’t wanted any food for a while, and noticed that I was losing a few pounds. Surprisingly, I felt as if I were starving and made myself a large bowl of cereal.

  I sat at the table in silence and looked down in my bowl. I was alone.

  * * *

  "You get out there and win me another fight, alright kid?" Arnold said.

  "Yes, sir," I nodded.

  Arnold opened the door and all the cheers hit me at once. I walked down the aisle with Arnold behind me, and then onto the open floor. Across from me was another girl my size who wore the same look as me. The look of determination. If she did well, then maybe she would go home. Win enough fights, and you get your freedom.

  A tall man in a black shirt stood next to us with his hand in between our bodies, “Fight!!” he lifted his hand and we attacked.

  There was no way I was going to lose to this girl. We both had the same goals, but I was more determined, and better trained. She tried the typical tackle, which told me that she wasn’t as experienced. I don’t even know why she was put in this fight, because she needed more work. It angered me every time we made contact, because I could feel her shaking. If anything, I'd end up killing her tonight if she didn’t step up her game.

  I punched her in the cheek and she fell to her knees, then I hit her again when she tried to look up at me, then again when she put her hand out gesturing for me to stop, and then again when she laid there on the floor in a small puddle of her own blood.

  It angered me to see her lying there so weak. Wasn’t she afraid of what would happen after she lost? Didn’t she go through the same punishments as me? Or was I alone? She looked hopeless, and maybe I could put her out of her misery.

  I looked up at Arnold and he nodded, then I went and did what I was there to do. I got down on my knees and wrapped my hands around her throat, and I didn’t let go, even though her fighting and attempt to scream. She scratched at my arms and then across my face, but I still didn’t let her go.

  “NO!” I saw a man come from the crowd almost running, then when I looked down I saw Winee’s lifeless body and let her go. I tried to get back to my feet, but I just fell back onto my bottom in shock.

  The man picking her up was her owner, and he rushed her out of the arena.

  The man in the black shirt pulled me to my feet and announced me the winner. Everyone clapped but Arnold. I knew what that look in his eyes meant, and it didn’t mean anything good.

  * * *

  I sat in my last period class and tried to focus on what Mr. Robinson was saying, but I couldn’t. I didn’t even know what we were learning anymore.

  My eyes were heavy, and I was tired. Lately, I haven’t been getting any sleep from having so many nightmares.

  “Rose, do you know the answer?” Mr. Robinson asked. It felt as if the whole class was watching me now.

  I snapped back into reality and widened my eyes, but I couldn’t clearly read the letters on the board. I shook my head no and he sighed, “Does anyone else know the answer?” Everyone sat in silence, and I returned back to my thoughts as I watched the snow fall outside.

  When the bell rang Mr. Robinson called me to stay after class.

  “Rose, do you know why I called you after class?” he asked. I shrugged and looked away. He sighed, “Your grades in this class are falling.” I clenched my teeth, but still didn’t look at him, “I don’t know what’s been going on with you, but you need to pick them up or you’ll end up failing the twelfth grade.” I still didn’t say anything, “Rose!”

  I jumped like I go into some kind of trouble. I thought I heard Arnold’s voice.

  “You were doing better than most when you first got here, and I was rooting for you to make it out of here and do something great with your life. You need to bring your grade up because at this rate-”

  “I don’t care,” I started towards the door.

  “If I have to, I will talk to your coach about your wrestling career here.”

  “I still don’t care,” I left the classroom and headed to wrestling practice.

  * * *

  As usual, I did the best I could during practice. It temporarily took my mind off of things and let my thoughts relax for a while. Two hours to be exact.

  Me and Cameron warmed up together then decided to partner up for the rest of practice. It had been a while since we’d paired up because I didn’t want to end up hurting him.

  Cameron was unusually gentle with me and I escaped a lot of his moves. I didn’t understand why he was going so easy on me, so I started to get a little rougher. I was going to force him to go hard on me.

  I made a mistake and took it too far, but at the time I wasn’t thinking about who I was slamming and threw him down hard. He yelled out and rolled to his side.

  “You’re alright, Cameron, get up,” Mr. Clothorn said.

  I looked down at him with a blank expression. Why was he being so weak? I couldn’t even find room to feel bad for him because I was angrier that he looked so pathetic. “You heard the Coach,” I said. Cameron was still on the ground holding his ankle. I had just remembered that he got injured a few days ago, but at this point I didn’t care. I’ve been through worse, “I said get up!” I yelled. The wrestling room got quiet, “Stop being weak and get up! How are you going to win out there, if you can’t even complete your training!?”

  Cameron looked up at me in shock. I was still frowning down at him with my fists balled, feeling bad that I had just yelled at him.

  Mr. Clothorn put his hand on my shoulder and I jumped and yanked away, “I think you should go home and get some rest, Rose,” he said calmly.

  I looked around and saw my team watching me, “Yeah,” I nodded, “Rest.” I looked down at Cameron one more time and almost said sorry, but I couldn’t get the word to come out. The look on his face gave away that he understood.

  When I got into the locker roo
m I tried to take some deep breaths and calm down. I put my hands on the back of my head and closed my eyes, “I’m not you,” I said out loud, “I’m nothing like you,” I punched the locker as hard as I could, “I’m nothing like you!”

  * * *

  When I got home I threw my things down and started to do push-ups. It wasn’t a routine that I kept up anymore because I was on the wrestling team and didn’t really feel the need to. Push-ups used to burn my arms and relieve me from my pain, but they didn’t help so much anymore. I did them until my arms went numb and rolled onto my back. I needed help.

  It’s funny how things can go so well, and all it takes is a mental break down to ruin everything you worked for. I closed my eyes and thought back to the night at Cameron’s party.

  Lorena looked so happy watching the stars with me, and even though that moment were brief, it was warming. It was a feeling that I used to get with Winee all the time. A feeling that made me feel safe...like things were always going to be like that.

  * * *

  I was on and off awake and asleep last night. I had fallen asleep on the floor and woke up with a pillow under my head and a soft cover over my cold body. My aunt Shannon must’ve seen me and didn’t want to wake me up.

  No one noticed me when I got to school. After a while of laying low, and keeping to myself, they felt no need to pay me anymore attention. The only ones that realized that I was there were the teachers, and that was only because they were all worried about me. Even the ones that didn’t teach me were concerned.

  Mrs. Pond stopped at my locker and took my hand, “Are you feeling alright, sweetie?”

  I saw Cameron walk by with other guys from the team. He didn’t say anything, but he put his hand up as if to say hi. I didn’t wave back.

  Mrs. Pond shook her head, “What’s going on with you?”

  “Why do you care?” I slammed my locker, “You know what’s wrong with me. You all know what’s wrong with me, and you pretend like you don’t. I mean, you know exactly who I am, Mrs. Pond. You didn’t think that I would be trouble when I came here?”

  “No, I didn’t,” she shook her head, “and I still don’t. Everyone has made mistakes in their life-”