Melting Her Dom's Heart [Dark Desires 3] (Siren Publishing Sensations)

by Suzy Shearer

  No he just wasn’t prepared to take the risk. Better to keep things on a purely sexual basis—that way they could still be together for rest of their lives without fear of either being hurt.

  Still, despite his resolve, the day they left he bought one of the colourful hammocks for her then got angry with himself for doing it. They’d arrived back at Palmas, and he’d reluctantly joined the others for a walk through one of the city markets, and he couldn’t resist himself when he saw it.

  He also bought a large moqueca pot. Kallie had told him how much she loved to cook. He often caught her talking to Marie about different dishes, and as soon as he saw the pot he had to buy her one. The next day when they flew back from Brasília he wondered why on earth he kept buying things for her when he was trying to steel his heart.

  Alex had arranged transportation for the very tired members of his crew when they landed back home. He said good-bye to the others and told them to take a few days off. Charles picked him up, and when they arrived back at the house Alex showered and then went to lie down. After maybe ten minutes of staring at the ceiling, he decided to give Kallie her gifts. Annoyed with himself for wanting to see her, he tried to justify it to himself.

  I just have to make sure she’s okay. I’m not going for any other reason.

  * * * *

  “Alex! I wasn’t expecting you? When did you get back?”

  “A few hours ago. I’ve been home, had a shower, and then thought I’d come and say hello.”

  “Come in. You must be tired.”

  “A bit. Just wanted to say hello, make sure you’re all right. I won’t stay long.”

  Kallie glanced at the wall clock. It was almost six fifty. “Have you eaten?”

  “Had breakfast this morning and a few cups of coffee. They fed us on the plane, too.”

  “Would you like something to eat?”

  “No, I’m not hungry, but I’d love a coffee.”

  Zeus had run inside barking as soon as he’d heard the car pull up. Then, at the sound of Alex’s voice, he’d gone crazy. So while Kallie made a coffee Alex and Zeus wrestled on the floor.

  “How has he settled in?”

  “Ha! He runs the place. It’s as if he’s always lived here. He’s really good, Alex. While I’m at work I leave him outside. He has his kennel, and the back paved area is all covered, so he has a plenty of shade or protection from the elements. Once I’m home, he can come inside whenever he likes, I had dog doors fitted in the back door and on the studio door.”

  “Let me guess—he sleeps in your room.”

  “Right, first time.” Kallie laughed. “I put a bed in there for him, and he’s happy to sleep there. I like it.”

  “Actually so do I. I know he’s protecting you.”

  “Mind you I think he’d lick a burglar to death, but at least he’d let me know if anyone came.”

  Alex got to his feet and accepted the coffee mug Kallie passed him. Zeus was happy to lie on the floor near them both now he’d had a play session with Alex. They moved over to a couch Kallie had in the family room and sat.

  “So tell me all about your trip. Did you get everything you wanted to film?”

  For the next hour Alex told Kallie all about his trip. She loved it when he forgot he was a Dom and just relaxed. Whenever he spoke about his work, he became so animated and interesting. She could hear the wonder in his voice when he told her about the jaguar and the otters. The way he described it all made Kallie feel as if she was there.

  “Oh, Alex, I wish I could have seen it.”

  “Once we get the rushes in order you’ll have to come over and watch them. That jaguar…honesty, Kall, I doubt I’ll ever forget it.”

  Kallie could hear the amazement in his voice and was envious.

  “I bought you a present.”

  “Oh you did?” Kallie looked around.

  “It’s in the car. Hang on. I’ll get it.”

  He left the room but came back a few minutes later. He handed her a large paper bag but kept hold of a large box. Kallie opened the bag. Inside she found a traditional Brazilian hammock. She was delighted with its bright colourful stripes.

  “Thought we could sling it between a couple of trees in the back.”

  “Thank you. It looks great. I love the colours!”

  “And I know you like to cook. This is a moqueca pot.” He opened the box for Kallie revealing a large black pot with a lid. “It’s made of clay and fired, and then while it’s still hot, they coat it with mangrove sap. That’s what turns it black. They use it to make stews, mainly fish ones without water.”

  Kallie, standing alongside him, put down the hammock as he handed the pot to her. “Wow. It’s heavy.”

  “I know.” He laughed ruefully. “I carried it as hand luggage.”

  She leant forward, kissed him, and then put the pot on the kitchen bench. “I’ll have to look up some traditional recipes. Thank you so much, Alex. They’re both so wonderful.”

  He looked down at her, and Kallie felt her heart race. Being around him always made her excited. He reached out and touched her neck, a puzzled look on his face.

  “You took your collar off?”

  “Yes. It seemed wrong to wear another man’s collar and be going out with you.”

  She could hear the dullness in his voice as he said flatly, “I see.”

  Kallie felt a cold hand grip her heart at the emotionless remark. “You sound…I don’t know, maybe disappointed, Alex.”

  “No. I’m just so used to seeing it on your neck. It takes a bit to get used to you not wearing it.”

  “Oh, okay.”

  She wondered if she should say she knew he wasn’t going to collar and never expected it. To her ears there seem to be more than the reason he gave, so she decided to change the subject rather than say anything.

  “You sure I can’t make you something to eat?”

  “No. I’ll get going. I just wanted to say hello before I go home and crash for a day or so worth of sleep.”

  She grinned up at him then they walked to the door. He pulled her close to him and kissed her. A kiss filled with such longing and desire it made Kallie feel tempted to drag him into the bedroom, but she knew very well he had to be tired from all his travel over the past few days. She knew she’d be exhausted. He ran a finger lightly down her cheek.

  “Can we have dinner tomorrow night after your work?”

  “I'd like that.”

  “Okay. I’ll meet you at my house then we can go eat, and maybe come back and I can enjoy your delightful body.”

  Kallie caught her breath as his face took on a sensual look. “Yes…yes, please.”

  “Good.”

  He kissed her again then walked to the car. Kallie watched his taillights as he drove down the track, and then she went inside. But now she wondered. He’d bought her gifts, something she knew he’d never done with other subs. Did this mean he was finally seeing her as more than just a sub? He was winding his fingers around her heart, and she hoped so. She really did.

  “I’m falling in love with you, Alex Harrison!”

  Chapter Sixteen

  Kallie felt distinctively nervous. Last night at dinner Alex had brought up the subject of contracts. He suggested that tonight they discuss and then decide on its contents. She did understand the need for a contract between Doms and subs. Both needed to know the others wants and needs as well as their limits. It spelt out in black and white exactly what both expected from the relationship. She and Peter had had one but had torn it up after two years. She wondered what Alex would want to put in it.

  Stacy had been surprised that he hadn’t mentioned it earlier. When Kallie had rung her and told her they were going to settle on something Stacy had told her to just relax. It was such a normal thing between Doms and subs and Stacy tried to reassure her it wouldn’t make any difference to the obvious growing feelings between Kallie and Alex.

  Tonight she and Alex had dined out again. Alex had suggested they have cof
fee at his home while they went through the contracts. He sat her down alongside him on a couch in the library.

  He had a folder with several sheets of typewritten paper in it. He handed it over to her. She began to read. To start it read as a basic contract with him promising to take her into his care and guidance, with trust and mutual respect, that the satisfaction of his wants, desires, and whims were consistent with her desires as a submissive and would be pleasing to them both. It mentioned honest and open communication on all aspects of their purely sexual relationship. It was very similar to the one she and Peter had.

  It then had a checklist of activities for both to fill in. Was it a hard or soft limit, something essential or only a curiosity? It astounded Kallie at how detailed it was. She looked over at Alex. He asked her to fill it all in.

  “I don’t want to overstep or inflict something on you that was a hard limit and we hadn’t determined it, Kall.”

  He had already filled in his copy but hadn’t shown it to her, telling her he didn’t want to influence her decisions. Nodding, she went through the checklist and then handed it over to Alex. He then copied his list to hers and vice versa. Kallie continued reading the rest of the contract while he did this, discovering information in case either wanted to break the contract they would with honesty and neither partner would hold it against the other.

  Then came his riders—Alex would never collar her. He would always ensure she got home safely, but she would never spend the night at his home, nor would he spend the night at hers. He promised to care for her after play, ensuring during and after sub-space she didn’t suffer sub-drop.

  This was not, nor would ever be, a full relationship. This was purely a sexual contract between two consenting adults and would never be anything more.

  Seeing it in black-and-white made Kallie hesitate. The past few months had been great. They were learning about each other, and they were exploring each other’s bodies and pleasures. Their meals together had been filled with conversation and enjoyment. Alex had spent weekends at her home helping her get the trees near the house trimmed back and generally cleaning up the area. He’d slept over, but now it looked like that might never happen again. Maybe it was just his standard contract, and they would more or less continue as before.

  She hoped that nothing else would change, but reading it, all Kallie had this nagging feeling in the back of her mind this was going to alter everything they’d shared.

  He sat beside her waiting. She took the pen back from him. He waited silently as she hesitated then signed her name on both copies of the contract before handing him the pen and the two copies. He signed his then gave her one copy.

  “I think it’s better that neither of us has unreal expectations of the other.”

  “Unreal expectations? I’m not sure what you mean?”

  “I don’t want you to think I’m going to collar you, Kallie. I want to be upfront right from the start.”

  “Oh okay. I understand that I wasn’t expecting you to collar me, Alex. If this is about my removing my old collar, I mean I never thought you would collar me. I just didn’t feel right wearing another man’s collar.”

  “No. No it’s not about that. This is just being honest with each other. And anyway the contract is for us both.”

  “I guess so.”

  “Didn’t you have a contract with the man who collared you?”

  “Yes, we did, but we tore it up in our second year together.”

  Alex gave a wry laugh. “No sub has ever lasted more than seven months with me.”

  Kallie looked at him in absolute horror. Surely he felt the difference with her? They been out together socialising, enjoying each other’s company. Now she was definitely worried.

  “Don’t look so worried. This time will be different.”

  “I hope so Alex.”

  “It will. I know it. We’ll be together until we’re both old and gray.”

  * * * *

  But much to Kallie’s disappointment Alex began slipping back into his role of a coldhearted Dom. Within a few weeks their social activities dwindle down until they became nonexistent. Now he held her emotional at bay. The laughing happy man had slowly disappeared.

  She’d noticed the day he returned from Brazil he’d seemed more aloof, or maybe it was when he’d noticed she’d removed her collar. Kallie felt he was now trying to keep his feelings on a tight leash.

  Definitely she saw a difference since that damn contract had been signed. It wasn’t as if she didn’t love being with him. She really enjoyed her time with Alex, but Kallie was finding it hard to keep emotionally distant from him. She started to worry if she showed her love for him, he would push her away completely. It was really hard to not let him see how much he meant to her.

  She couldn’t understand why he had changed. She wondered if while he was away, he’d decided he was getting emotionally too close to her and had forced himself back into his icy ways. Before he went Kallie had almost convinced herself that Alex was thawing out. They’d done so much together, had spent hours relaxing in each other’s company just talking. They had gone to dinner, to the theater, had taken drives around the area. But since she’d signed the contract, all of that had stopped.

  Now they would dine together a few times a week after work. Afterward, she would follow him to his house, where they would play for a few hours then she would drive herself home. Sometimes on the weekend Alex would pick her up, take her somewhere to eat, and then back to his house, but if that happened Charles would be the one to drive her home afterward. A couple of times Alex stopped by her house, but after sex he would leave. Gone was the carefree man.

  It was all beginning to get to Kallie. She angrily berated herself. From day one she’d known what she was getting into but because he’d shown her another side she really thought things would be different between them. Now she had slowly come to the realisation he would never change, could never change. He would hold her at arm’s length from now on and would never let her wind her way into his heart the way he’d entered hers.

  She cried to Stacy one day. “What the hell am I going to do, Stacy? I’m so in love with the fool.”

  “I don’t know, Kall. I honestly don’t. He was acting so different. He seemed to be delighted to show his feelings, but now he’s gone back to being Mr. Frozen Heart.”

  “You know what I think? I think it’s that bloody contract!”

  “What do you mean, Kall?”

  “Well, before we signed it, we went out. We did things together. He relaxed around me. Don’t get me wrong. The cold, in-control Dom lived in the bedroom, but at the same time I saw the other side of him. We had fun. He would even ring me at work just to say hello. Then he came back from Brazil. After we signed the stupid thing, the frozen Dom started to return, to be back in charge. Now we’ve stopped any socialising. It was exactly as the contract stated—sex and nothing else.”

  “Sounds like you’re right, but what can you do about it?”

  “That’s the trouble. Nothing. I just have to either accept the relationship as it is or leave.”

  “What do you want to do?”

  “I don’t want to leave him, Stace, I love him so much. Maybe it’s better to have him as the emotionless Dom than not have him at all. Maybe when we’ve been together a year or so he will realise that I do love him and want to stay with him. I’m hoping then he will relax and let his emotions out.”

  “I’m so sorry, Kall. I wish there was something I could do.”

  “No one can do anything. He’s locked his heart away in a freezer. No one can melt it. I just have to accept that or get out.”

  * * * *

  The week before Christmas Alex’s father rang to arrange dinner with him that night. Alex was surprised because his father was rarely in this area of the world. When Alex arrived at the restaurant he was surprised to see his father had a very young woman with him.

  “Alex, this is Bunny Saint Clair. Bunny, sweetie, this is my son Ale
x.”

  It took all of Alex’s years as an in control Dom to smile politely at the woman. She was everything he detested—a bleached blonde with a figure that probably was filled with more plastic than a Barbie doll. She giggled and said something indecipherable about sons and fathers.

  Throughout the meal Alex’s impressions of her only got worse. Most of the time she was either giggling inanely or else talking baby-talk to Alex’s father. When she left to go to the ladies room Alex asked his father what on earth was going on.

  “I thought you were engaged to Silvia?”

  “Oh, that didn’t last. She found some young stud and broke off the engagement.”

  “I’m sorry. So who’s Bunny?”

  “I met her at my tennis club. She was trying to learn how to play with one of the pros, and I offered to help. Been teaching her how to play.”

  “I bet. How old is she?”

  “Age doesn’t matter, Alex, but if you must know she’s twenty-three.”

  “Heavens, Dad! You’re seventy-four. Don’t you think she’s looking at your wallet rather than you?”

  “Doesn’t matter. She makes me laugh and I feel young around her.”

  Alex just shook his head and took another mouthful of his whiskey and soda.

  “Like I’ve always told you, Alex. Take whatever you want but don’t fall in love. When you fall in love they always screw you up. Look at your fucking mother!”

  “I’d rather not.”

  “Neither would I. Anyway my advice has always been get out once the initial glow has worn off before they get the chance to do it to you.”

  “You’ve been telling me this since I was a kid, Dad.”

  “Yes, and I’m right. If you do have the misfortune to fall in love for heaven’s sake, don’t let her know! Because mark my words, you tell a woman you love her, and she’ll mess with your head and leave you heartbroken.”