Wild Abandon

by Jeannine Colette

  “See you tomorrow, boss,” Jose, one of my workers, calls out to me when we arrive at the garage.

  After the equipment is away, most of the guys take off for the day while others stick around for maintenance work.

  As for me, I’m ready to go home.

  I whip off my shirt, which is sticky with sweat, and walk the hundred yards to the house I built when I brought Crystal back to Napa.

  It’s a small house but a good one. White with green shutters and a wraparound porch.

  I run up the front steps and stop by Willie Mays, who’s having what could be his seventh snooze of the day. “Hey, pal, I have thirty minutes to shower and shave before dinner. You coming in?”

  Willie slightly lifts his head. Then, it falls back to his paws, and he goes back to sleep. He’s old for a rottweiler, so if he wants to spend his final days sleeping on a porch, so be it. I give him a rub on the head and walk inside.

  My favorite things about the house are the smells—mahogany floors, cookies, and the distinct smell of cherries. Yes, a family lives here. My ball cap and sweatshirt are hanging by the door, Crystal’s cello is resting against the living room wall, and a child’s toys are scattered about.

  That would be Austin.

  I didn’t have Crystal back six weeks before she got pregnant. It was an accident, but I meant what I said. I was ready for my life to start, and, by God, did it start.

  Walking over to the mantel above the fireplace, I grin at a photo of Austin. Auburn hair, olive-green eyes, and a wicked smile. His hands and face are covered in red because he got into a barrel of grapes. Austin is a wild child. Two and a half years old, and he’s ready to get into everything.

  If I didn’t know better, I’d think Ed was teaching him how to cause mass destruction wherever he went, just to mess with us. Every time the kid gets into trouble, Ed laughs and eggs him on. The two are incredibly close. As close as a grandfather and a grandson could be.

  The day Austin was born, Ed welcomed him into the world with open arms. He’s done so much for me, but welcoming Crystal and Austin into his life was the greatest gift Ed could have given me.

  Anyone looking from the outside would think our family was odd. A man living on the same ranch with his sick daughter’s husband and his new girlfriend, the mother of his child. It’s not normal, but none of us are. We’re creating our own modern family, especially since Crystal and I never married. How could we? I was still married to an amazing woman who had stolen my heart on a dare.

  Ellie.

  I look to the photo next to Austin’s. It’s the picture of Ellie and me on the day we met, the day we married. I’ll never regret the years we spent together, and I’ll always wish her life had ended differently. But things happen for a reason, and I’ve learned to just go with it.

  Ed and I kept our promise and continued to visit Ellie on a rotating schedule. I asked Crystal to come a few times, but she thought it was too disrespectful. She always said it was unfair that she’d already taken so much of Ellie’s life, that the time Ellie had with us was too precious even if she didn’t know we were there. I never argued, and I enjoyed my days reading beside her.

  I didn’t know what to do when we got the call that Ellie had died in her sleep. Part of me was devastated. Even though she hadn’t been here mentally, there was something comforting about her being here physically.

  An ashamed part of me was relieved. She now had the peace I’d yearned for her to have.

  I didn’t know what to do with these conflicting feelings, and I felt like a weak man if I voiced either of them.

  Ed was quiet for a few weeks as well. We kept our distance. Even Crystal knew enough to let us mourn on our own terms. The first time we’d lost Ellie, we’d both broken down. It had taken four years to turn us around. We really could have gone either way.

  But we did okay, Ed and I. We made it through the funeral and into our new lives without Ellie with our hearts still intact and our tempers in check.

  The entire time, Crystal waited patiently for us.

  Crystal.

  The third picture on the mantel is the one I took of her the day we went wine-tasting for the first time. I was falling in love with her. To think I put a wee-wee pad under her while she slept, and she still fell in love with me? I still mess with her sometimes. Whenever she drinks, I place one on the bed. Not because I think she’s gonna piss herself. I just like to hear her yell at me as she comes barreling down the stairs in the morning, her hair a mess and her arms flailing about. She’s cute when she’s mad.

  I still can’t believe she actually came back with me. I was sure she’d have put up a bigger fight. But when you are as devastatingly handsome as I am, who can resist?

  I laugh at my own joke.

  Honestly, what the hell was she thinking?

  She once told me she’d rather live a half-life with me than a full one without me. Well, if this is half-living, then I can’t imagine what living life to the fullest is.

  Well, there is one thing that I’m lacking.

  A wife.

  The damn girl won’t marry me. At first, it was impossible. I was still married to Ellie, and I’d never end the marriage to her. Not while she was still on this earth.

  But Ellie has been gone for a year, and now, I want to make Crystal Reid my wife. I’ve tried everything. I even had Austin ask her for me. She won’t even do it for our son. She’s a stubborn woman, that Crystal Reid.

  I run up the stairs and take my shower. Then, I grab a bottle of Jack and old Willie Mays, and we walk over to the veranda where the Santangellos are joining us for dinner. Most nights, we have dinner on the veranda. It’s easier for Ed.

  When I brought Crystal back to Napa, we rented a home in San Rafael for a few weeks until Ed said he couldn’t climb the stairs to the apartment above the garage anymore. Told us to knock it down and build something of our own. Crystal and I were hesitant until Ed showed up with a crane one day and started tearing the thing down himself. We turned the office of Russet Ranch into a bedroom for Ed.

  “Daddy!” Austin is the first to run up to me.

  I grab him and lift him high in the air. His face is full of fudge. Typical.

  “Wook,” he says as he shoves his palms in my face, opening them to reveal a small frog.

  “Nice catch, buddy. Let’s put him in Naomi’s hair,” I whisper into his ear.

  And the little devil smiles. Okay, so maybe Ed isn’t the one responsible for Austin’s whimsical ways.

  I put him down, and he takes off for the veranda. He walks up behind Naomi, who is sitting at the long dining table, talking to Jeremy. Austin’s face scrunches in confusion when he finally decides to use the chair next to Naomi to get up high. Then, he places the frog in her curly dark hair. Ever the mischievous toddler, he stands there with his hands covering his mouth as he laughs.

  “What’s so funny?” Naomi asks her godson with squinted eyes.

  Jeremy is pressing his lips together, trying to keep from bursting out loud, and his face is turning bright red in the process.

  “Austin Teller, if there is a worm on my head, I will tell your mother!” Naomi starts patting her head, which makes Austin giggle even harder. When her hand touches the slimy, sticky little green guy, she bolts up from her seat. “What is on my head?” she screeches, batting at her hair.

  The frog jumps onto the floor and hops away from the commotion toward the rose garden.

  My laughs are pretty loud as well, leading Naomi to look at me with a face that’s part angry but mostly amused.

  She points her finger at me. “You’re gonna pay for that.”

  I walk over with my hands up in defense. “Don’t blame me. I was all the way over there.”

  Naomi turns to Austin. “Who told you to put that frog in my hair?”

  “Daddy.”

  Naomi gives me an I-knew-it look.

  I kiss her on the cheek. “Just make sure to check for head warts.”

  “Warts?�
�� she yells.

  “Calm down, Mom,” Scarlet says, walking over from where she was reading a book on the bench. “It’s a myth that frog pee will give you warts.” She gives her mom an eye roll, the way only preteens can.

  “What’s with all the racket? You’d think there was a rave going on out here.”

  “Hey, Ed.” Jeremy rises to shake the old man’s hand. “Austin crowned Naomi with a frog.”

  Ed looks over to the little guy, who is now standing at the foot of his cane. Ed puts out a fist. “Way to go, kid.”

  The two fist-bump, and then Ed pulls a small plastic gun out of his pocket. “You and I are going to do some shooting practice.”

  I shake my head. “Ed, he’s only two.”

  Ed waves a hand at me. “Nonsense. The thing shoots darts, and you’re never too young to learn how to shoot. Who’s gonna protect this place when I’m gone?”

  “Me,” I say incredulously.

  Ed makes a harrumph sound and looks down at Austin. “Come on, we’ll start by shooting cans. It’s all in the eye, see?”

  I watch as Ed takes my son and tries to turn him into the tiniest member of the conservative party.

  “Live life for the moment because everything else is uncertain,” Scarlet sighs next to me.

  “Tolstoy?”

  “Louis Tomlinson.”

  I raise a brow. Who the hell is Tomlinson?

  “One Direction.” She walks over to her bench and reopens her book.

  I shrug and give the old boy band some credit. That is how life should be lived—for the moment. And, right now, Ed is teaching my son how to shoot a plastic gun.

  I’ll worry about that later.

  The back door making a loud slamming noise pulls my attention over to the woman walking outside, wearing a flowing white sundress. Crystal’s hair is curly, just the way I like it, and her arms are full of platters. No, she didn’t cook. She still can’t. She tries, but that job is mine. I love cooking for my family, and I love preparing the meals for the wine tastings. I made everything for tonight’s meal earlier this afternoon. Her only job was to heat it up in the industrial ovens we had installed in the winery.

  Crystal is my sous chef. And she’s one hell of a beautiful one, if you ask me.

  I walk over to her and take the platters from her arms before placing them on the table. Naomi walks inside to get the rest as Jeremy sets the table.

  With Crystal’s hands free, I take the opportunity to kiss her. I love to kiss her. Soft, warm lips wrap around mine. I know I sound like a girl, but I literally melt when she runs her fingers up my back. And when she tugs on my hair? Damn, she’s my kryptonite.

  I press into her and have to think of dead puppies or something before getting too turned on in front of our company.

  “Hey there.” She smiles with her eyes closed as I release her from our kiss.

  I lean into her ear and whisper, “I changed my mind. Let’s send everyone home and make love in the rose garden.”

  “What about Austin?” she asks.

  “He’s due for a sleepover.” I kiss her neck and half-hope she tells me okay and sends everyone away.

  “Nice try. You wanted everyone over, so you’re playing happy host.” She hits me in the chest and walks toward Ed and Austin to, most likely, yell at Ed.

  I grab her hand and pull her back. I spin her around, so she’s sitting at the head of the table.

  “Actually, I thought we could have a drink first.” I grab the bottle of Jack I brought from the house. “For old times’ sake.” I give her my most charming smile.

  Crystal skeptically eyes me.

  I place two shot glasses on the table and pour one for each of us.

  She picks up her glass and takes the shot. The back of her other hand flies to her mouth. She always tries to cover up the initial burn.

  I sit down next to her, take my shot, and then refill the glasses. Her eyes glaze over, and her cheeks turn pink. She licks her lips and tilts her head down, making her hair fall over her shoulder. She’s putting the moves on me, and I fucking love it.

  Damn, she’s beautiful.

  “Marry me,” I say.

  “Nice try, Teller.”

  “Make an honest man out of me. What will people think?”

  “Come on, Crystal. Give the guy a break,” Jeremy says.

  I give him a nod.

  “Living in sin, these two. No way for a boy to be raised,” Ed echoes from the corner.

  Crystal closes her eyes in avoidance. “No,” she says sternly. “I don’t need a ring on my finger to prove my love for you.” She puts her hand over my heart, over my tattoo, and says, “What we have is deeper than what any piece of paper can offer.”

  I lean back and cross my arms over my chest. “All right, tattoo my name across your chest, and we’ll call it even.”

  Naomi walks onto the veranda and sees the visual standoff between Crystal and me. “What’s going on?”

  “Crystal’s going to have Nate’s name tattooed across her chest,” Jeremy says.

  “Sweet.” Naomi laughs.

  Crystal shoots her a death glare. “I’m not having anyone’s name tattooed anywhere.” She looks back at me. “No offense. I’m just not a tattoo kinda gal.”

  “I know.” I smirk, and she sticks her tongue out. I put my hands on my knees and lean forward. “That settles it. You’re just going to have to marry me.”

  “Nathaniel—”

  “Come on, Crystal, marry the man,” Naomi pleads.

  “Put him out of his misery,” Jeremy adds.

  I call Austin over and set him on my leg. I look at him and pull my bottom lip out in the way Crystal does when she’s upset or deep in thought. When Austin sees me make the face, he makes it, too. With our platypus faces in place, we both look at Crystal, and I even throw in some sad puppy-dog eyes.

  “Is this an ambush?” Crystal asks.

  I just blink my lashes at her, like a wounded pup.

  “No,” she says.

  And it just plain sucks.

  I put Austin down, give him a kiss on the head, and send him back to play with his grandpa. I rise, down my next shot of whiskey, and turn around to start serving dinner.

  For a woman who came to Napa to find love and get married, she certainly is letting her goals fall short. Here I am, practically begging her to marry me, and she says no. I’m gonna have to up my game. Maybe another weekend in San Francisco. I’ll take her to—

  “Hey, Nate?”

  The way Crystal says my name forces me to turn around with one brow raised.

  “Marry me,” she says, like it’s no big deal.

  My head rolls back, and I look up at the sky as I run my hands down my face. “Finally!” I shout. My head falls forward as I dramatically shake my head. “You finally agree to marry me, but not when I asked you? A man needs to do the asking.”

  “A woman needs to do the telling. And I’m telling you to marry me—right here, right now.”

  “Now?” I point my finger to the ground, accentuating the fact that she just said now.

  She mouths the word, Now, right back at me. Her mouth is tipped up at the end, her green eyes sparkling.

  “Now? As in, let’s-hop-in-the-car-and-drive-to-Vegas now?” I ask.

  “Now, as in Naomi became an ordained minister last week and is going to marry us in the rose garden.” She’s smiling a stunning yet conniving smile.

  The little minx had this planned. No wonder she’s wearing a freaking dress.

  I look at Naomi for confirmation. She pulls out a paper that looks like some sort of certification. “Bet you wish you hadn’t put that frog on my head now, don’t cha, Nate?”

  Looking back over at Crystal, I tilt my head and say, “We don’t have a marriage license.”

  “Got one right here.” Jeremy puts another piece of paper on the table.

  “All we need is a pen,” I say, not taking my eyes off of Crystal’s.

  I’m waiting for her to
chicken out. She’s not budging.

  The veranda is quiet for a long moment. I see Naomi and Jeremy fidgeting about.

  Scarlet lets out a loud huff, “You two can’t be in charge of anything.” She places a pen on the table.

  I take a step forward, pour two more shots of Jack, and hand one to my bride-to-be. “Last chance to back out.”

  “And waste a perfectly good proposal?” she teases. “Never.” She downs the shot and places it on the table, hard.

  “Nate, you are destined to never get married to a woman like a normal man should.” Ed stands from his spot, grabs Austin’s hand, and says to him, “Looks like we’re going to a wedding.”

  Ed’s right. I’ve never asked a woman to marry me and had her say yes. Twice in my life, I’ve been told to marry. And, twice in my life, I’ve gotten married in jeans.

  I wouldn’t have it any other way.

  The seven of us walk into Rosemary’s garden, a place of burgundy beauty and pure magic, and Crystal and I get married.

  Naomi does a terrible job at officiating our wedding. She even forgot to bring the vows, so she tries to pull them up on her phone, but I don’t need traditional vows to pledge forever to Crystal.

  I take Austin into my arms, pull Crystal in with the other, and recite vows as best as I can remember, “I, Nathaniel Teller, take you, Crystal Reid, to be my wife. To have and to hold, in sickness and in health, forever and always. All the days of my life and a million more after. I promise to be true to you and never let you go for as long as I live.”

  Crystal’s eyes turn lighter and brighter than I’ve ever seen in my life.

  “I, Crystal Reid, take you, Nathaniel Teller, as my husband. To have and to hold, to love and to cherish, for all the days of my life. I promise to be true to you and to love you, for better or for worse, for richer or for poorer, and all that other fun stuff. It’s me and you. Forever.”

  She lifts her thumb to my cheek and wipes away the tear that was falling down. I do the same for her.