“Did you speak to Susannah last week?” I ask as we head east along the A259.
“Briefly. Why?” Tristan asks.
I shrug.“No reason,” I answer keeping my gaze out the window, there are so many boats out on the water today.
“Coral.” Tristan admonishes. “Look at me.”Reluctantly, I turn my head and our eyes briefly meet.“Why did you just ask that?” I sigh heavily, running my hand through my hair. I decide if I am going to talk to him about my concerns, it can't be now, not here in the car.
“Later,” I say smiling back at him, trying to lighten the mood, my mood.
He looks frustrated.“Why can't you just say now?” he asks.
“Because...” I clench my teeth unable to get the right words out, I decide to plant a seed, let him know I know something.“There is something you should know about, but I'm not sure if I should tell you or not. I'm not sure it’s my place to say,” I answer.
“Is it about Susannah?” he asks. I nod my head.“Then you should tell me,” he states, sounding very much like a boss, not a future husband!
“I will, but right now we have a whole day of happy families to get through. Can you trust that I’ll tell you when we get back?” I ask, praying this won't come back and bite me on the ass.
Tristan pulls my hand to his lips and kisses my knuckles again.
“Of course, it can wait,”he says. Thank God!
AS TRISTAN PULLS UP OUTSIDE MY CHILDHOOD HOME, Irealise how nervous I am. My stomach twists as I watch Tristan exit the car and walk round to me. Opening my door, I take his hand and step out of the car.
Tristan shuts the door, and I'm about to walk off when he stops me by tugging on my hand.“Coral,”he softly says.I turn and look up at him, wearing flip-flops was not a good idea, he’s so tall compared to my short arse, but I didn’t feel like making too much of an effort today, so I opted for my white linen trousers, my light-blue vest-top and my flip-flops.
“What are you so nervous about?” he asks.
“Everything,” I choke, sounding just as nervous as I feel.
Tristan grimaces.“Spill,” he says watching me vigilantly.
“Ok, first off I have to go meet new people. Malcolm is nice, so I'm sure his family will be too...I just...I’m not very good at it, I get tongue tied.” I blurtrunning my hand through my hair.
“And I get embarrassed and shy, and now everyone is going to meet you too and…” I stop and take a breath. “I told Gladys, well she kind of guessed we’re seeing each other, but I played it off as friends,” I add, hoping he’ll just go along with it.
“Why?” Tristan asks in astonishment.
“Because you don't know what they’re like when they get together. It’s like they enjoy watching me squirm,” I say, scowling at the floor.
“Hmm…” Tristan pulls me into him, leans down and kisses me forcefully. I lose all other thoughts.“Feeling better?” he breathes against my lips.
“Yes,” I squeak.
“Good. Now, I'm not going to walk in there as your ‘friend’ Coral. So be brave, take my hand, and walk with me,”he tells me firmly.
“Ok.” I take a deep breath, and place my hand in his.
We walk the few steps towards the garden path and stop.Tristan takes a deep breath, squares his shoulders then looks down at me and smiles shyly. Holy crap!He’s nervous, I never thought he would be!
“You’re nervous?” I guess.
“A little, I want your family to like me,” he answers.
“Oh believe me Tristan, they already do,” I blurt, laughing as I do.He cocks his head to the side, quizzically. Ok, explanation needed!
“Debs thinks you’re hot, and Gladys thinks the sun shines out of your backside, so believe me baby, you have nothing to worry about,”I say.
His face bursts into his cheeky school boy smile – Then I think about Tristan’s proposal. Fuck, he doesn’t know I haven’t told anyone!
“Tristan, they don't know you proposed to me,” I whisper, feeling bad for not wanting to tell everyone.“I just thought...it’s you know, a little early and I don't want....” I break off, feeling stupid!
“It’s alright Coral, it’ll be our little secret,” he says winking at me. My heart raps against my chest and my stomach blooms with that strange soulful feeling.
“Thanks,” I whisper in relief. Leaning down, Tristan takes my face in his hands, and kisses me so softly I feel my legs wobble in response.
“Wayhey!” I hear Debs shout from behind me. Crap!
I pull back in surprise and embarrassment, just as Tristan starts laughing, evidently he doesn’t care that we just got caught kissing. I turn and glare at Debs as she struts her stuff across the road, her hands full of games for the children. Then I double take when I see she’s wearing a skin tight beach dress, it doesn’t leave much to the imagination, at least she’s wearing a bikini underneath it. I grit my teeth feeling slightly jealous. Debs has always known how to flaunt her body in the right way. She looks very tall, slim and tanned; I guess she’s been making the most of the good weather!
“Debs!” I snap, scolding her for embarrassing me. She stops in front of us, completely ignores me and smiles up at Tristan, batting her eyelashes at him.Oh god, this day is going to be hellish!
“Well hi there handsome,” she says blatantly flirting with him.
Tristan chuckles at her. “Hi Debbie, nice to see you again,” he says leaning down to kiss her cheek.
“Ooh, don’t you smell nice,” she says, her cheeks flushing.Oh god! I can just imagine what fantasy is bobbing around that head of hers!
“Can I help?” Tristan asks politely, ignoring her flirting.
“Well sure you can handsome!”Debs winks at Tristan, and starts to pile all of the games in Tristan’s open arms, then she flicks her long blonde hair and smiles up at him.
“Debs!” I scold. This is beyond embarrassing!
“What?” She turns and titters at me. I narrow my eyes at her. I swear there’s smoke coming out of my ears, and I have a whole day of this to look forward to!
“Come on Tristan, let’s introduce you to everybody,” she says, manhandling him down the garden path. As he reaches the steps to the front door, he turns to me – I think it’s going to be in desperation – but when our eyes meet, he winks at me then smiles his cheeky grin.
I chuckle at him and shake my head. Debs leads him up the steps, and through the open front door. Walking forward, I feel myself relax a little; at least Tristan is taking all this in good humour. As I step inside the hall, I can hear Debs introducing Tristan to all the people in the kitchen – As my boyfriend! – He sounds happy, animated.
As I continue down the hallway, it suddenly dawns on me, maybe there’s a reason why he’s taking this all so well.Tristan doesn’t have this anymore, no folks to introduce me to and no other family. I finally realise how lonely he must have been since his folks died, I try to imagine what it must have felt like to be him, being totally alone in the world. It makes me question what it’s going to feel like when my family move away.
“Darling!” I look up and see Gladys gliding towards me – What is she wearing?
“Hi,” I squeak as she reaches me, squeezing all the air out of my lungs. “You look nice,” I say questioningly.
“Oh! Do you think so? Malcolm bought it for me,” she says twirling round. I think Malcolm may have bought a size too small! What is this wear next to nothing day?
“Um...yeah it’s...it’s a lovely colour,” I say gazing at her breasts that are nearly popping out of the lemon halter-neck-see-though-dress that just about covers her backside – Thank god she has a costume on underneath it!
Gladys giggles in delight.“Tristan looks nice,” she says linking her arm in mine.
“Yeah he does,” I agree, picturing him in his cream t-shirt, his navy blue combat shorts and flip-flops – Very casual, very summery, and very sexy!
“So how are you two getting along?” I smile shyly at her –W
hy do I feel so awkward talking about it?
“Gladys, you know he’s not’ –“Just a friend?” she interrupts. “Darling I knew from the moment he took you home after Lily’s party,”she says, patting my arm.
I gape at her –I didn’t even know we’d be together back then.
“Some things are transparent,” she whispers, smiling knowingly at me.
My mouth pops open in shock. I don't know what Malcolm’s doing to Gladys, but she’s really changing, she never would have said something like that to me before.
“SoulMates,” I whisper. Gladys gasps and turns to me with wide eyes. I quickly bring my finger to my lips. “Shhh, don't say anything,” I plead.
Her eyes fill with unshed tears, then she unexpectedly pulls me into her chest, her bosoms suffocating me again– Oh god!
“Darling!” she chokes. I try to say something but it just comes out all muffled.“What was that?” she asks.
I pull back from her.“I said…it’s early days,” I whisper. “So please don’t make a big deal out of it,” I beg.
Gladys pouts at me then resigns when she sees the look on my face.“Alright, alright, I won't ask when you’re tying the knot!” she teases.I go to argue but she continues before I can.“Now come along darling, lots of new people to meet,” she says as she walks down the hallway.
I take a deep breath, and follow her through the kitchen door...
TRISTAN HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED FROM ME. Everyone wants to speak to him, so I make myself useful by helping Malcolm in the kitchen. He’s wearing his funny apron again – I should rephrase – he’s only wearing his funny apron and a very scanty pair of white swimming trunks. I don't really think it’s ideal for barbecuing!
As I watch Tristan entertaining Lily from the kitchen window my heart pangs with sorrow, he’d have made such a good Dad. Brushing the thought away, I look around the garden at all the other people I’ve got to meet today.
Malcolm’s identical twin daughters are lovely, but it’s hard to tell which one you’re talking too, but I know that Ellie is a beautician who is married to Darren and they have identical twins Matthew and Martin, and Erin is a Graphic Designer who is married to Ed and they have twins Aimee and Katie. I know that they both married their Uni sweethearts and got pregnant at the same time, and that their kids are eight years old. They all seem really close which is nice, and Malcolm seems to adore his girls, as a father should – I halt that line of thinking, I don’t want to get emotional today.
Looking out the window again, I see Lily take Matthew’s hand and lead him into the paddling pool that’s been erected for the occasion. Scott, Darren and Ed are chatting animatedly about football, personally I can't stand the game, but each to their own, I’m so glad Tristan doesn’t like it though; he’d go to a lot of games on his own if he did.
Tristan is sat next to Joyce, chatting freely with her. I think she has mind reading powers because just as I think that she looks up, catching me staring at them both.Joyce smiles teasingly at me, and waves. Feeling embarrassed, I smile and wave back, and as I do, I see Tristan chuckle to himself, no doubt at me.
Erin, Ellie, Gladys and Debs have done nothing but sip cocktails, and lie on the sun loungers for the last hour. No wonder Gladys and Debs weren’t wearing much,I can't help giggling aloud; I think Spain is going to suit them.
“Share the joke!” Malcolm booms making me jump – I’d forgotten he was there!
“Nothing…” I chuckle. “Just...” I turn and look up at him. “I'm really happy you met Gladys,” I tell him. “She seems like a different woman. Like she’s…she just seems so happy, so thank you Malcolm, for making her that way.” I smile up at him, his bright blue eyes smile back at me.
“She makes me very happy too,” he says, smiling broadly. “Ready with the salad?” he adds.
“Yep, all done,” I answer.
“Good. Let’s get cooking!”He says.
I giggle as I follow Malcolm outside; he’s so funny and likeable. I feel that melancholy feeling try to wash over me again; he really would have made a great Dad…
AN HOUR LATER AND WE ARE all tucking into Malcolm’s delicious meal. There’s marinated steaks, sausages, burgers, chili salmon, king prawns, and an array of barbequed vegetables.I'm in my element! – I am sitting next to Tristan who’s tucking into a steak.
I smile up at him.“Nice?” I ask as I take a forkful of salmon and veg.
“Very nice,” he answers leaning in to kiss my cheek.I don't know why, but I feel shy again.
“They all like you,” I whisper.
“Shame they’re all moving away,” he says, his eyebrows knitting together. I wonder if he wants them to stay too, now that his family is gone, poor Tristan.
I feel my heart sink a little. “Yeah…” I mumble, and carry on eating.
SOMETIME LATER AS ALL THE adults sit under the veranda, taking a break from the afternoon sun, and the kids are playing and splashing about in the paddling pool, the conversation changes to the news.I drift off as they talk politics, economics and such; Tristan seems to know what it’s all about, giving an opinion every now and then. I find it all so boring, so I scoot down in my seat, rest my head against the back of my chair, and have a little afternoon siesta…
“Isn’t it just awful news about that Jimmy Savile!” Gladys pipes up loudly, waking me from my snooze. I don't have a clue what they are talking about, I rarely watch the news and I never pick up newspapers.
“He always gave me the creeps.” Debs shudders, my ears prick up in response. In my peripheral vision, I notice Tristan tense up beside me.
“I think it’s frightening,” Erin says. “You just don't know who you’re safe to leave your kids with,” she adds.Shit! This is not good!
Saliva swims in my mouth, I swallow hard and try to blank it all out, but my heart starts pumping against my chest, making my breathing accelerate. I try to control it, because I don’t want anyone to see this conversation is affecting me.
Thankfully,Tristan casually places his arm around my shoulders and gently strokes my right shoulder with his fingertips, comforting me, then he gives my shoulder a gentle, supportive squeeze.I turn and smile weakly at him, he leans into me and gently kisses my temple, but unfortunately, the conversation continues.
“You’re right Erin, it is scary,” Debs says. “I must admit though, when Scott and I had Lily, we promised to tell her from an early age about that kind of thing.” Scott clutches Debs hand.
“Yes, we’ve all done the same. It just seems as though it’s rife, it’s everywhere,” Ellie bellows. “I hated taking the boys to nursery when they were due to start, you just never know!”
“It’s just awful,” Gladys cries. “Especially a man in that position, all those children, they trusted him.” I pick up my wine and take a good couple of gulps. I feel Tristan’s fingers enclose around my free hand and squeeze gently, but it’s no good, I don't want to hear any of this.
“Coral are you alright?” Malcolm asks. “You’re as white as a ghost,” he adds. Everyone stops talking, they all turn in unison and stare at me. Crap!
“Yeah...” I breathe. “I think it’s just the heat. Excuse me,” I say standing up from my chair.
Tristan clutches my hand to stop me.“Want me to come with you?”He whispers.
I look down at Tristan and very subtly shake my head.“I'm good, I just need a bathroom break,”I whisper back. I throw a fake smile in for good measure, but Tristan’s brows are still knitted together in concern.
As I walk around the table, I turn to seeGladys watching me with concern, her expression worn, and something else…Grief? No, that’s not it…Pain? Yes, that’s what I can see in her eyes, looking away from her, I head indoors…
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
BYPASSING THE KITCHEN AND GOING STRAIGHT TO THE UTILITY room, I yank the downstairs bathroom door open, then stepping inside, I fill the sink with cold water. Scooping my hair up, I cup the water with my hand and soak the back of my neck, cl
osing my eyes to the cooling sensation.
“Coral?” My eyes dart open. I'm not surprised to see Gladys standing in the doorway.
“Hey.” I look down at the sink and scoop up more water, dabbing each cheek.
“Coral,” Gladys’s voice is soft as she carefully steps into the bathroom. “You know you can talk to me, about anything darling,” she says, holding my hair up for me as I cool my neck once more with water.
“Yes,” I answer staring blankly ahead.
“Well why can't you tell me this?” she asks, holding my chin up so I have to look at her.
“It’s nothing,” I say, hoping my eyes don't give me away.
“Did somebody hurt you darling?” she asks.
I sigh and close my eyes.“Yes, my parents, my sister…” I open my eyes and stare back at her. “The only one that didn’t was you,” I whisper.
“That was my job darling. To keep you safe, to help you recover, to show you that you deserve so much love and affection,” Gladys takes a deep breath. “Everyone in your life had let you down. It was my responsibility to show you that it’s not always true, that there are people you can rely on, that you can trust.”She softly strokes my cheek.“I remember how long it took you to trust me, to believe I would be there when I said I would. You were such a withdrawn little thing, so tiny, so precious…”she drifts off, tucking my hair behind my ear.
Unwelcome tears start to fill my eyes – Bollocks! This is all Tristan’s fault, he’s turned me into a blubbering wreck!
“I know something happened to you darling, something much worse than your father abandoning you, or your mother failing you. I could tell, and I always thought when you were ready to tell me, you would, but you never did. I often wonder if I did something wrong, or didn’t do something right, I wanted you to feel as though no matter what you told me, it wouldn’t make any difference to how much I loved you, cherished you....” Gladys drifts off.
Darkest Fears Trilogy: Fallen For Him / Freed By Him / Forever With Him Page 77