Finding the Fire Within

by C. C. Masters

  I was a failure as a wolf. If I had spent my life embracing what I was instead of burying it, would I have the skills I needed for this? I had spent very little time as a wolf and most of that time was spent just playing.

  I heard Jason’s voice shouting at me from the forest. “Anna! Get back here!”

  He must have been desperate if he changed back to human just to yell at me. But a naked man chasing after his ‘dog’ would probably be almost as weird as seeing a pack of wolves running across a road. The males in my pack were just so large and wolf-like it would be difficult to pass them off as anything other than what they were.

  I trotted back to the forest but the scent of the motorcycle on the trail enraged me once again. I pawed at the ground in frustration, snapping at anyone who came too close. I had been so close to finding one of Evelyn’s murderers. I paced back and forth, there had to be a way that I could follow after that man.

  Jason had turned back into his wolf and was trying to nudge me to go back to the range. I snarled at him, I was not leaving. I don’t know what I was going to do, but I was going to do something.

  What if I followed along the side of the road and tried to pick up on his scent where he left the road? Kind of like following a river until I could find the place that my prey came back on land. I perked up a little. I could do that.

  I could hear more people coming down the trail towards us. Friend or enemy? Mason’s voice stood out to me. He had better be here to help me. Mason, Trevor, and Davis appeared on the trail, now close enough to see us.

  “Anna!” Mason shouted. I watched him approach with narrowed eyes, suspicious of whether he was here to help or hinder me.

  Mason crouched down in front of me and stroked the top of my head. Normally, I would love it, but today there was no time for that. “Anna.” He said softly. “I know you are upset right now, but I need you to come back with us.”

  I snapped at him and he pulled his hand back and stood. I shook out my coat before stalking back to the edge of the road. I was not going to let him stop me from my mission.

  I felt a sharp sting on my right flank and turned my head sharply to see what it was. There was something lodged in my coat and I helplessly tried to paw at it before trying to grab it with my teeth. My eyes widened once I realized what it was, and my vision started to go black. Did they really just shoot me with a tranquilizer gun?

  I fell to the ground, my limbs felt too heavy to move. I fought to keep my eyes open as Mason approached me again. I lost the battle as I felt him stroke my coat soothingly. “Sorry, pretty girl.”

  Chapter 21

  James

  The two little shitheads just brought Anna back from weapons training unconscious. I think it was safe to say that things did not go well. I made sure she was safe in her bed before chasing the fucks out to the hall.

  “What the fuck?” I growled at Mason. “You really thought shooting her with a tranq gun was the best option? Those tranqs are calibrated for a two or three-hundred-pound male.”

  Mason paled but growled back at me. “You weren’t there.” Jason stepped up to his side to face me down.

  We stood like that for a moment, none of us willing to back down. I heard Austin’s footsteps come up behind me. “I want to know what happened. Now.” He told the twins.

  They lowered their eyes from mine and took a step back. Mason let out a breath and hunched his shoulders in a little. “Everything was fine. We were cleaning up the explosion when Anna caught a scent.”

  “The guys had already followed it and it lead to nowhere.” Jason added. “I didn’t think there was any harm in letting her see for herself. She seemed really determined to help.”

  Jason shrugged self-consciously. “I don’t know what happened. She looked angry and said that she knew the scent and that he was ‘there’. I thought she was talking about the IED, but I think it was more than that.”

  I closed my eyes briefly. “It was definitely more than that.”

  Austin and the twins looked at me with a question in their eyes. “We had already determined that the same men who murdered Evelyn were responsible for the attack on the house. Is it really that much of a stretch that they would also be responsible for the IED?”

  I saw understanding flash in Austin’s eyes, but the twins looked like they were not following. “Anna walked through the crime scene after Evelyn was murdered. The body was already removed, but it was still obvious what happened in that room. The killer’s scents were still strong enough to be identified.”

  I saw pity in their eyes and Jason glanced towards Anna’s room. “I didn’t know.” He said quietly. “She never said anything.”

  “That explains a lot.” Mason murmured. “I never thought I would see Anna out of control like that, but it was impossible to reason with her.” He turned to Austin with a pleading look. “She was out in the middle of the road in plain sight of humans, howling out her frustrations. She just...lost it.”

  “We had to get her back here and without the pack bond we couldn’t reach her…” Jason told him.

  Austin nodded. “When she wakes up, I will be having a talk with her.” He said firmly. “I need you back at the scene for now. Make sure Trevor’s team has whatever they need.”

  Mason glanced at Anna’s room and looked like he wanted to object.

  “I will watch over her.” I growled at him.

  The twins both looked at me in surprise, but nodded. They both murmured an assent to Austin and headed back down the stairs.

  Austin turned to me with a sigh. “We can move her to Caleb’s room if you need to go.”

  I stiffened. “I can contact my sources by phone and coordinate with Trevor from here.”

  Austin looked at me critically. “Anna might be fragile when she wakes up, can you handle that?”

  “I can handle it.” I grumbled. “She’s more likely to be combative, anyway. We fucking tranqed her in the middle of her hunt for vengeance when she was on the killer’s trail. What would you have done in that situation?”

  Austin sighed. “We are lucky Anna is more gentle than the rest of us, I’m not sure what would have happened if that was you or Trevor.”

  I grunted in response. It probably would have taken more than just a tranq to take me down and stop me from tearing someone to pieces. The second I was awake I would be right back after them. As much as we liked to act human in this pack, we weren’t. There was still a part of us that was wolf.

  It was a mistake to think that Anna was going to be sweet and gentle all the time, though. I was starting to see that Anna had a fierce and protective side to her. But I had realized it only came out on behalf of others, not herself.

  “I’m taking Cody and a few of our guys to meet with Arminius after the pack meeting. He wanted to meet to discuss our payment for help with Caleb’s trial, but I’m going to see if I can get a referral for a witch.” He told me solemnly.

  My eyebrows rose. “Can they really be trusted?” I asked.

  “No.” Austin said bluntly. “But we can’t continue to wait around to be attacked. We need to put a stop to this and track down whomever is harassing us. If we have to make a deal with a witch, then that’s what we’ll do.”

  “I don’t like it.” I told Austin bluntly.

  “I don’t either.” He confessed. “But we have a lot at stake here.” He glanced towards Anna’s room.

  “And if the trail leads back to your father?” I asked softly.

  His eyes hardened. “Then I will deal with him.”

  I clapped his shoulder in a sign of solidarity. “You will have the whole pack at your side. You are not facing him alone.”

  Austin gave me a small smile in return. “He won’t be facing us alone either.”

  I hesitated, glancing between Austin and Anna’s room. I didn’t like sending my pack-master into a meeting with the lamia without me. But Anna… would Caleb be able to handle a vicious Anna, intent on destroying her enemies?

  I wasn
’t able to provide Anna with romance, and loving relationships were not my area of expertise. But when it came to vengeance and violence? I could understand that.

  Austin must have picked up on my internal debate. “Stay with her.” He said quietly. “She’s going to need you. I have more than enough back-up to meet with one of our allies.”

  I nodded at him in agreement and we said our goodbyes. I headed back into Anna’s room and closed the door behind me. I was immersed in her scent as I walked further into her room and sat down on the bed next to her.

  Her breathing was deep and steady, her face peaceful. I carefully brushed a stray lock of hair off her face affectionately. If the tranq had been too much for her body to handle she would have been showing signs of distress by now. But it would probably take longer for her to come out of it than one of us.

  I did not like her like this, she was completely defenseless. Anyone could walk in here… I found myself growling and stopped. No one was getting near her.

  I laid down next to her with my phone. I planned on keeping a close eye on her. Just in case.

  Chapter 22

  Anna

  I woke up to a dark room and had a moment of confusion. I recognized the scent of my bedding, but when had I gone to bed? My mouth was so dry, I needed water. I moved to stretch out and try to orient myself. My brain felt so foggy and I felt almost disconnected from my body.

  I rolled over to find James watching me, which just made me even more confused. He set down his phone on the nightstand. “How are you feeling?”

  “Thirsty.” I croaked out.

  He smiled and handed me a bottle of water. I reached out for it gratefully and gulped down half of it before I even thought to ask him what was going on.

  He leaned back and arranged one of my pillows behind his head. I frowned, he looked quite comfortable there. I tried to think back to the last thing I remembered but I felt like I was trying to swim through Jell-O.

  “Don’t feel bad,” James told me softly. “More than one of our pack-members have had to be tranqed at one time or another.”

  “Tranqed…” I murmured. I gulped down the second half of my bottle while I tried to focus. It slowly started to come back to me.

  I had been running in the woods, hot of the trail of the killers, and someone had hit me with a tranquilizer dart! I shook my head to try and get rid of the cobwebs that lingered there.

  “I was a wolf..” my voice trailed off. I could recall that the dart had hit me in the flank and I couldn’t reach it through my thick coat. I ran a hand over myself. The only thing I was wearing right now was one of Mason’s shirts, and I was human.

  “How?”

  James frowned at me. “Austin was worried about the dose being too high for you when the twins brought you in. He changed you back to human, so we could monitor your vitals more easily.”

  “He can just change wolves back to humans? The twins mentioned parents could do that with their babies… but I didn’t think he could do that to me.”

  James nodded. “Austin is a pretty powerful alpha. He can force the change on someone, but he avoids it if possible. If you were awake and fighting it, it could be painful.”

  I threw myself back on the pillow. “I guess I just kind of think about us as humans who sometimes look like wolves. It still surprises me when you tell me about magical stuff like that.”

  James snorted. “We might look human, but we’re not.”

  I just grunted and closed my eyes. I still felt very disoriented and my brain didn’t seem to want to work. I tried to think back to what had happened. I was running in the woods, but before that…. I frowned and turned to James.

  “How long have I been out?” I asked cautiously.

  He sighed. “About five hours.”

  I watched him, watching me. It was very odd to see James just lying in my bed beside me. He was always so vigilant and on edge that it was strange to see him almost relaxed. He also didn’t see as closed off as he usually did, he seemed comfortable to be here in my bed with me.

  My mind started to go other places… I had James in my bed with me right now. I could just reach out and touch him. What would he do?

  I shook my head to clear my thoughts. These drugs had clearly addled my brain. I should be upset right now. My pack had shot me with a tranquilizer, hauled me back home, and set a guard wolf on me.

  I narrowed my eyes at James. “I had a plan, I was going after Evelyn’s killers. You guys can’t just lock me up here, I’m not a helpless female.”

  He raised an eyebrow at me and I could feel his amusement. “Obviously, we can.” He said dryly.

  I sat up with a huff and swung my legs over the side of the bed. I held still for a moment, so I could let the sudden wave of dizziness that overcame me pass. “I have work to do.” I told him firmly. “We just wasted five hours, the scents will be fading.”

  James rolled over the bed to my side and stood on the floor in front of me. I had to tilt my head way up to look into his eyes. “Our guys are on it, you need to rest and let the effects of the drug fade.”

  I tried to push him away from me, but my body was still weak. I had tried to give him a hard shove, but he didn’t budge after my hands made contact with his lower abs. I removed my hands from him quickly when I realized just where I was touching him and blushed.

  The fact that I blushed made me angry, especially because it seemed to amuse him. I hopped up to stand on the bed, only swaying a little, and looked down at him. He looked up at me with a faint smile and put his hands on my waist.

  “You’ll be back to normal in less than an hour, why don’t you just sit down for now and let the effects wear off.” He said gently.

  He was being reasonable, so I couldn’t think of an argument to make without seeming childish. “Uggg, Fine.” I told him as I sat back down on the bed and threw the covers over my bare legs.

  I didn’t miss his gaze on my bare legs before I covered up. I hope I hadn’t flashed him or anything. “I’m still upset that I was drugged by my own pack.” I told him sternly, trying to deflect his attention to what was really important here.

  “I’m supposed to be able to trust you guys.” I hated the fact that a little bit of hurt bled out into my voice. I was trying to be tough right now.

  “And we are supposed to be able to trust you.” James told me pointedly. “You were running around in a public area, in plain view of any humans, howling.”

  I squirmed and avoided his gaze. “Any humans who saw me would have just assumed I was a large dog.”

  “And if they didn’t? Or if they called animal control? Or the police? I didn’t think we needed to have this talk with you when you first came to us, but clearly, we do. You will not do anything to expose this pack to the humans or put us in danger.”

  I cringed at his words. He was right. I had lost my common sense and acted stupidly. I had let my emotions get out of control and acted completely out of character. I knew better; I had been hiding from the world for so long, I knew how important it was to stay under the radar.

  “I’m sorry.” I said quietly, all of the wind taken out of my sails. “I’m just tired of sitting on the sidelines. I need to do something.”

  James sat back down on the bed. “I know. But I think you have worked for the military long enough to know that you step up when you have the expertise, and you step back when you don’t.”

  I nodded. “And rationally, I know that.” I picked at the blanket. “I’m just frustrated because this has been dragging on for so long without a resolution.”

  James sighed. “Move over.”

  My eyebrows rose when I saw he intended to get back into bed with me, but I scooted over to give him room. We were close enough that our bodies touched, but he was on top of the covers and I was underneath.

  James laid back on the pillow and stared at the ceiling as he spoke. “Austin is in a meeting with Arminius now-“

  I sat up in surprise. “Is he here?” I asked ea
gerly. The mysterious Arminius was one of the few people who I knew could tell me something about my mother.

  “No.” James looked annoyed that I had interrupted. “Austin will be back later today with… someone who can hopefully end this.”

  I huffed. “Way to be cryptic, James.”

  He just snorted. “Lay back down and rest.”

  I wanted to refuse just because he told me to, but I really did still feel exhausted. I snuggled down under my blanket and turned to face him. We sat quietly for a couple of moments while he texted on his phone and I reflected on what had happened.

  The thought that Evelyn’s killer could have been so close to me while I was completely unaware was infuriating. If I had immediately chased after the motion in the woods when I saw it, I would know exactly who he was. I was so angry with myself for sitting idly by while my pack was once again attacked.

  James probably heard me huffing and puffing in my fit of anger because he turned to me with a concerned look in his eye. ”Anna, it might seem like we lost this round, but trust me, we will win the war.”

  “I’m just so angry with myself.” I told him honestly. “I don’t want to be lying here, I want to be going after them.”

  James ran his hand over my hair with surprising gentleness. “I understand wanting to go after the killers.” He told me softly. “But you’re not ready to do that on your own.”

  I sighed. “I know. I just hate feeling so helpless and weak.”

  “You’re not.” He told me confidently. “I wouldn’t waste my time training you if you were a spineless coward.”

  My eyebrows rose. Sometimes his compliments sounded a little odd, but I appreciated the sentiment.

  “Anna, sometimes a hunt turns out to be longer than we expected.” He told me. “We might need to lie still in the tall grass and wait for our moment before attacking. If we act rashly, we risk scaring our prey before we have the whole pack in place for an ambush.”

  He caught my gaze and held it. “I promise you that we will find vengeance for Evelyn and we are going to destroy those who threaten our pack.” He told me fiercely.