Playing With Fire

by Ruth Staunton

  “I did, I do, I am.” Linda broke off, swearing mildly. Stacy’s eyes widened. It had to be bad if Linda were swearing. Linda did not swear. Ever.

  “Is Cade ok?” Stacy cursed herself for asking, but it was out before she could stop it.

  “He’s fine,” Linda assured her. “It’s Nicky. He’s run off again.”

  “In this mess?” Stacy glanced warily at the sky outside her window. It wasn’t raining yet, but the gathering clouds were an ominous black and the dull gray sky had taking on a faint yellow tinge. Stacy didn’t need a weather report to tell her a serious storm was brewing.

  “Unfortunately,” Linda replied, sighing. “Apparently, he had some kind of argument with Cade and took off. Cade’s been grumpier than a bear with a sore head lately, and now he’s just beside himself with worry. Anyway, we’re putting together a search party.”

  “I’m on my way,” Stacy said, cutting Linda off before she could say anymore. She’d already pushed her feet into battered sneakers and was shrugging on her raincoat. “I’ll be there in 10.” She clicked off, shoved the phone into her pocket, and headed out into the gathering storm.

  The tiny police department was swarming with people when Stacy arrived. Cade, as expected, was in the thick of it all, standing at least half a head taller than anyone else in the group and clearly in command of the situation. From the corner of her eye, she caught sight of Gail, huddled in a corner near the coffee pot, looking lost and clearly distraught. Stacy wanted to hate her but found she couldn’t. She was worried enough about Nicky herself. She couldn’t imagine what the other woman must be going through.

  Someone handed Cade a pink phone message paper. He glanced at it then crumpled it in his fist and spun on his heel, heading for the door. The crowd parted before him like the Red Sea. He plowed ahead taking no notice until his gaze fell on Stacy, and he faltered, stopping in his tracks.

  “What are you doing here?” he demanded.

  “Linda called me,” she replied, managing to stay calm despite the fact that the sight of him had her heart pounding like a jackhammer. “I want to help.”

  Cade looked decidedly skeptical, but didn’t comment. “Thank you,” he said politely, “but there’s no need. Will McBride just called in and said he spotted Nicky’s bike out by the old water tower. I’m headed out there now to bring him home.”

  “I’m coming with you,” she demanded, planning her hands on her hips. His eyes lit with a fire that would’ve had most people running for cover, but Stacy didn’t budge. She wasn’t backing down on this, not today, not when Nicky’s safety depended on it.

  “Dammit, Stacy, be reasonable,” Cade fumed. “You’re a civilian. You don’t have a bit of search and rescue training. The last thing I need is two of you lost in this mess. Just go home.”

  “No, you be reasonable,” she countered. “I may not have any training, but I grew up in this town. I spent half my childhood traipsing around in those woods, just like Nicky. I know them like the back of my hand. Furthermore, as far as I know, I’m the only one in recent memory to have actually climbed that water tower. I’m not going home; I can help you.” He clearly wasn’t convinced. Stacy sighed, flicking back hair from her forehead. It was wet from her brief dash from the car and clinging stubbornly to her face. “Did Will see Nicky or just his bike?” she asked.

  Cade leveled her with an impatient look. She thought for a moment he might keep walking and ignore the question, but he answered. “Just his bike, but if his bike’s there, he’s bound to be close. He can’t get too far in this weather.”

  “It hasn’t been raining long,” Stacy reminded him. “He’s probably in the woods, but what if he did decide to climb the tower? There’s no way you can go up after him. That tower will never hold your weight. Trust me, it barely held mine. You’re going to need someone smaller, and there’s no reason for you to wait for somebody from town. Take me with you.”

  He glared at her, his expression grim, but jerked his head in the direction of the door. “Get in the truck.”

  She turned without a word, triumphant at winning the argument but not daring to say so for fear he might change his mind. It was only after she was sitting in the passenger seat of his truck that she noticed she had obeyed his command without a second thought.

  He followed on her heels, started the truck, and drove silently toward the outskirts of town. The air between them practically crackled with tension. The weight of it curled in her stomach like a lead weight. She struggled for words with no idea at all how to bridge this gaping hole between them. The pain was too new still, too fresh. “Linda said Nicky was upset,” she said finally, hesitantly. That seemed a safe enough topic; that was why they were both here, after all.

  Cade sighed. “I suppose that’s one way to put it. Throwing a tantrum is more like it.” Stacy made what she hoped was an encouraging noise and nodded. It worked. Cade went on. “He was disrespectful to Gail, and I had a word with him about it.”

  “Had a word literally or figuratively?” Stacy asked, knowing perfectly well that in Cade’s world a discussion was just as likely to involve spanking as conversation and often both.

  “Literally,” Cade replied grimly. “Gail won’t let me discipline him like he really needs. Although, so help me, if we get through this in one piece, that is going to change today. I promised him a spanking if he ran off again, and he’s damn well going to get it. This has to stop before…” He trailed off then, clearly unwilling to put words to the unthinkable. Stacy couldn’t honestly say she blamed him. She didn’t want to think about it either.

  “How is he dealing with your… new relationship?” The words were painful to say, but it was rather like poking a sore tooth. She couldn’t seem to stop herself.

  “What new relationship?” Cade said sharply. “There is no new relationship.”

  “Well, yes, I know. I mean, you and Gail aren’t exactly new. You’ve known each other for years, but dating is new, isn’t it?” Stacy stammered. Even if it wasn’t, at this point, Stacy would rather he lie. She wasn’t sure she could take the idea that he had been with Gail the whole time they were together or perhaps even before they met.

  “I wish to hell I knew where you got that idea,” Cade flared. “I’m not dating Gail, or sleeping with her, or anything else. We’re friends. I’m Nicky’s godfather, and that’s it.”

  “Where I got that idea?” Stacy said incredulously. “Half the town knows about it. It’s all anybody was talking about. You may as well admit it. There’s no point in lying to me now. That ship has sailed. The cat’s out of the bag.”

  “There is nothing to lie about,” Cade insisted. “I’m not dating Gail. I don’t have any interest in dating Gail, and even if I did, I couldn’t do that to Greg. She’s my best friend’s wife.”

  “Widow,” Stacy corrected. “Greg’s gone. There’s nothing standing in your way now.”

  “Don’t you think I know that,” Cade shot back. “You never have to remind me of that. It’s my damn fault he’s dead. He died in my arms, and there’s not a day of my life that I don’t think about what I cost her and that little boy. I’ll spend the rest of my life trying to make up for that, but I will never ever try to take his place, not with Nicky and certainly not with Gail.” He took a deep breath, obviously trying to control his emotions. “Hell,” he said lightly. “It’d be like dating my sister. Besides that, I’d likely kill her within the week. I love her dearly, and she’s family, but her whining and coddling would drive me crazy.”

  Stacy stared at him, stunned. For the second time in just over a month, she felt as though the ground had shifted under her. He hadn’t cheated on her? It was just a rumor? She’d ruined her whole life and thrown away the best thing that ever happened to her over a rumor. Had she really been that stupid? Part of her wasn’t so sure. After all, he could be lying, but even as the thought formed she knew it wasn’t true. The emotion was too raw, the feelings too deep and sincere to not be truth. No one was that good. Y
ou could fake a lot but not that pure visceral reaction. That was real. She’d bet her life on it.

  “They said you spent the night,” she said weakly, feeling like a first-class fool.

  “That’s what this is about,” he said, giving a dry and humorless laugh. “I knew I never should have watched that damn movie.” Turning to Stacy, he added, “I did. Nicky asked me to stay and watch a movie after I brought him home from ball practice. I said no, but he begged and I gave in. I was dead on my feet and fell asleep on the couch before the movie was over. Gail said she didn’t have the heart to wake me and left me there until the next morning. It wasn’t a secret. If you’d asked, I would’ve told you.”

  Stacy didn’t know what to say to that. She wanted to kick herself for not asking and immediately assuming the worst, but at the same time, she knew that asking wouldn’t have helped. She would have been sure he was lying. After all, the men in her life always had. “I’m sorry,” she said finally, soft and awkward, feeling ridiculously shattered and close to tears.

  “Me too,” Cade said, just as soft.

  “I’m an idiot,” she said bitterly. “A stupid, brainless idiot.”

  “Hey,” he said, sharp enough to make her look up. “Watch your mouth. Nobody gets to talk about you like that in my presence and that includes you. Whatever happened between us, you still matter to me, and that hasn’t changed.”

  “How can it not?” She asked bleakly. “I said horrible things. I accused you of terrible things.”

  “Yeah, you did,” he said bluntly, “but we can work that out later. Right now, let’s get Nicky home.” He shoved the truck into park and shut off the ignition.

  Stacy looked around blankly, realizing belatedly that they were in the middle of the field in front of the water tower. The rain was coming down harder, and through the windshield she could see Nicky’s bike lying in the mud a short distance away from the tower. She drew a deep breath and forcibly drew herself back to the present and off of the emotional roller coaster she had been on. Cade was right. Right now, they had to find Nicky. She could worry about the rest of it later.

  Chapter 12

  Stacy drew the hood of her jacket up over her head as she stepped out of the truck, but it did little good. The slight spitting rain that had started as she arrived at the police department had evolved into a steady downpour. Cade made a beeline for the woods just beyond the edge of the field, but she instinctively made her way over to the water tower. The mud clung to her feet like glue. It felt like she would sink into the bog with every step. Despite the difficulty, she kept moving. She couldn’t afford to stop. Nicky was out here in this mess somewhere.

  Cade thought he was hiding in the woods, but she would have bet her last dollar that he climbed the water tower. He was a nine-year-old little boy, furious and spoiling for a fight. He wasn’t looking for a place to hide. He would’ve been looking for the challenge, the chance to prove himself. He would want them, and specifically Cade, to know he was old enough and strong enough to handle himself. The tower was strictly forbidden to all the town’s children and had been since Stacy herself was a child. Climbing it would have been an irresistible challenge and the most forbidden thing he could think of, all at the same time. That Stacy understood. At his age, and even older, she would’ve done the same thing herself.

  The water tower was essentially a large wooden barrel with an angled roof like an upside down funnel minus the spout. The barrel sat atop a flat wooden platform that was supported by a leg on each of the four corners. Numerous X-shaped cross-braces went between the legs, stabilizing them and giving the base of the tower a look reminiscent of a dilapidated wooden spider web. The entire structure was seriously weathered and leaning precariously. Much of the wood had rotted and many of the cross braces were broken. It was treacherous to say the least. Looking at it, part of her began to doubt her theory. She wasn’t sure a nine-year-old boy could even manage it.

  Even so, when she finally made her way through the mud over to the tower, she cupped her hands around her mouth and yelled for Nicky as loudly as she could. The small curly head that popped over the edge of the platform was so high in the air that from the ground, in the rain, it barely looked more than an indistinct black dot.

  “Go away!” Nicky called back. “I’m not coming down.”

  A wash of relief flooded her chest. Getting him down might be a challenge, but at least he was there, and okay, and not lying dead in a ditch somewhere or worse. Right now, that was enough. Stacy turned to call for Cade, but he was already emerging from the woods.

  “You found him?” he asked, clearly having recognized Nicky’s voice even through the rain. Stacy nodded, lifting her gaze upward and pointing. She saw the moment his eyes lit on Nicky. In an instant, the same relief that had flooded her flitted across his face. Then, he bellowed, “Nicholas Matthew, get your ass down from there. Now!”

  Nicky was having none of it. The small, dark head disappeared instantly as he backed away from the edge of the platform. Cade drew himself up and was about to shout up to Nicky again, but Stacy stopped him with a hand on his arm.

  “That’s okay, Nicky. You don’t have to come down. I’m coming up,” she said.

  “You are not,” Cade hissed. “The last thing I need is both of you stuck up there.”

  “Got any better ideas?” Stacy asked. “If he were going to come down on his own, he would’ve probably done it when the rain started. I don’t think he’s up there soaked just to make a point. It might have started out that way, but I’d imagine that faded about time the rain started. At this point, he’s probably too scared to come down and doesn’t want to admit it.”

  “If that’s the case, how is you being up there going to make a difference?” Cade asked. “If he is too scared to climb, someone is going to have to bring him down. You’re not going to be able to do that.”

  “I’m hoping I’ll be able to talk him into climbing down together, but if all else fails, I can carry him down on my back if I have to,” Stacy told him.

  “He’s nearly as big as you are,” Cade said. “There’s no way you can carry him.”

  “I’m stronger than I look,” Stacy insisted.

  “You’re insane is what you are,” Cade told her. “No one else is climbing that damn death trap. I’ll get the ladder truck from town.”

  “It’s not tall enough,” she said with absolute certainty. “Besides, this mud is like quicksand. There’s no way that anybody is getting that ladder truck out here without it getting bogged down up to the gills.”

  “Damn it, Stacy,” he began, but before he could finish the thought she had moved to the base of the water tower, studying it carefully.

  A moment later, she made a decision and took a grip on one of the cross braces, hoisting herself up. Behind her, she heard him make a strangled sound of protest, but she didn’t hesitate. She moved up a little further, testing the strength of the wood and finding solid hand and foot holds before she shifted her weight. Agonizingly slowly, she made her way upward. She was soaked to the skin despite the jacket, and the wet wood was slick as glass. Each move was deliberately planned and had to be executed with great care. Stacy found herself holding her breath and mentally reciting long forgotten prayers from infrequent childhood Sunday school lessons. Finally, after what seemed like an eternity, the platform at the top came in to reach and she pulled herself over the edge. She flopped down on her stomach, breathless and incredibly grateful not to be plummeting down to the ground below. When she looked up, Nicky was staring at her.

  “What are you doing here?” he asked.

  She shot him a look, raising an eyebrow, but remembering he was only a nine-year-old boy, she bit back her instinctive response of ‘what the hell do you think I’m doing here?’ Nicky knew the answer anyway, and they both knew it.

  “I’m still not going down,” he said, glaring mutinously at her though she hadn’t said a word about him coming down or anything else.

  “Okay the
n,” she said pulling herself upright into a sitting position, settling in and sitting cross-legged as though they were playing board games on the living room floor instead of in the middle of a torrential downpour atop a rickety water tower.

  “It’s raining,” he said exasperatedly.

  “I noticed,” she replied wryly. For a few minutes, neither one spoke. After a while, Stacy asked,” What was bad enough to bring you out in this weather?”

  “Nothing,” Nicky muttered. “I just wanted to climb.”

  “Uh-huh, and you expect me to believe that climbing the most forbidden place possible had nothing to do with pissing him off,” Stacy said dryly. “Nice try, kid, but I’m not buying it. Try again.”

  Nicky hissed out a breath. “He’s being a jerk. I can’t do anything without him being on my case. He has rules for everything. Mama never had rules before or not many anyway.”

  Stacy nodded. “Cade’s pretty big on rules. It’s hard to get used to, isn’t it? I’m not much of a rule person either. It’s been different for me too.”

  Nicky shot her a skeptical look.” At least he can’t ground you.”

  It took everything Stacy could do not to laugh. Cade hadn’t tried that yet, but she wouldn’t put it past him. He certainly didn’t hesitate when it came to warming her backside. Hell, she was probably in for it now. She was pretty sure he would consider climbing this water tower reckless and dangerous. She didn’t care. She’d do it again in a heartbeat. Whether he liked it or not, it had been her only real choice.

  “Yeah, being grounded sucks,” she agreed, “but is it worse than being out in this weather?” Like her, he was soaked to the skin. His thin tee shirt was plastered to him, and she imagined it was both cold and clammy. His normally wild curls clung to his head, streaming water down his face and back. He was trying to hide it, but she could see him starting to shiver. However mad he might be, getting dry and warm had to be a serious consideration. He didn’t answer, but she could see him wavering. He wanted to give in. She could see the longing in his eyes as clearly as if he’d spoken it aloud, but just when she thought he was about to give in, something flashed in his eyes, and he shook his head.