Won't Miss You: A Brother's Best Friend Romance (We Shouldn't Book 4)

by Lilian Monroe

  23

  Benji

  I’ve never planned an event in my life, and I’m glad I have Willow by my side. She meets me at the Woodvale Skydive airfield, her long, blond hair tied back in a low bun. When I park my car, she walks over to me with a smile on her face.

  “Just over a week now,” she says. “Have you figured out how you’re going to get Sarah over here?”

  “She’s been wanting to try a skydive but has been too nervous, so I told her she could come watch how it’s done on the weekend. Oliver is on board, so they can’t back out.”

  Willow grins. “Clever.”

  We walk to the big hangar, where Finn and Esme had their engagement party. That’s what sparked the idea for me to have Sarah’s surprise party here.

  Kit, my boss and the main pilot for the airfield, looks up from a chair. “Benji!” he calls out, smiling. “Is everything all organized for next weekend?”

  “Just putting the final touches together. Thanks for letting us use this space.”

  Kit grins, extending his hand to shake mine. “I should start charging people to have events here.”

  “Not a bad idea,” Willow chimes in. “We could team up. Sell a premium skydiving wedding package.” She grins, arching a brow.

  Kit laughs. “I can see why your business has been so successful.”

  We walk around the space and Willow points out where the DJ booth will be set up, where the chairs will be, and goes over the catering plans. I’m spending a fortune on this party, but Sarah deserves it.

  Plus, a part of me likes the idea of coming here with Rae. It’s not just a birthday party. It’s a way for us to come out as a couple. I’m excited to show her off.

  Willow asks me a thousand and one questions for the final details. Do I want mini quiches, cocktail sausages, or both? What type of alcohol do I want to stock? What color tablecloth? Which wine glasses?

  “Willow,” I interrupt, shaking my head. “I don’t know! Just…pick whatever. I don’t care.”

  She pauses, staring at me, then starts laughing. “Sorry. I’m used to dealing with weddings, where every detail has to be perfect and exactly how the client wants it.”

  “I just want there to be food, alcohol, music, and everyone she cares about in one place. I don’t give a shit about what color the tablecloths are.”

  She grins, nodding. “Noted. Maybe I’ll branch out from wedding planning. I could get used to this kind of freedom.”

  A van pulls up outside, and Finn jumps out. Esme, his fiancée, comes around the front of the vehicle with a smile on her face. Finn slings his arm around her shoulders. I watch her angle her face up toward him and smile as he lays a gentle kiss on her lips.

  My heart tugs.

  That’s what I want.

  To be so comfortable with Rae that I can kiss her whenever and wherever I want to. To put my arm around her shoulders and proclaim to everyone that she’s mine. I’m hers. We belong together.

  The feeling slams me in the gut, and I wonder how I lived before this.

  Life with Rae is different. She makes me see what’s important and gives me hope for a better future. She makes me look forward to coming home in the evenings. I actually want to plant a garden around my house, because I know I’ll be doing it with her.

  Willow and I tie up the last few details and I exchange a few pleasantries with the rest of the Woodvale Skydive team. Then, I get back in the car and drive home.

  To Rae.

  Because that’s home to me—wherever she is. I drum my fingers on the steering wheel and let a smile drift over my lips, knowing that this weekend, I’ll put my arms around her shoulders and tell everyone I’ve met the woman for me.

  Sure, everyone probably already knows. It’s a small town. Sawyer saw us at the café, and we haven’t been particularly private.

  But coming to this party together and letting all our friends and family know we’re dating—that’s different. It feels real.

  When I pull up outside the garage, I rush inside and head straight for the office. Rae is there, still staring at a computer screen as she tries to make sense of Harold’s old records. Her eyes widen when she sees me, but before she can say anything, I pick her up and throw her over my shoulder.

  “Benji!” she cries out, laughing.

  “You’re done working for the day.” I exit the office, kicking it closed behind me. She laughs, tapping my butt as I walk toward the front door.

  “At least let me lock up and set the alarm,” she says.

  I grumble, but set her down and wait for her to lock the garage doors. Once it’s done, she slides into the front of my truck.

  “How was your meeting with Willow?” she asks as I start the vehicle.

  “Fine. The party should be fun. But there’s another party I want to have right now. With you, and me, and no one else.”

  Rae giggles, reaching over the gear box to feel the hard shaft between my legs. I grin, turning onto my street and groaning as she starts to stroke.

  “I think you actually want me to crash the truck.”

  “No, I just can’t resist.”

  After a tense drive, we fly through the front door. I slam it behind me as we fall in a tangle of arms and legs to the ground. In just a few weeks, I’ve gone from hating Rae, to respecting her, to being totally, completely infatuated with her.

  A part of me thinks I might be falling in love with her. Hard.

  I tear her clothes off, tossing them away. She claws at me, ripping the edge of my shirt and letting out a soft oops.

  “Doesn’t matter,” I grunt, tugging at her underwear.

  Rae gets a wicked smile on her face and spins me onto my back, right there on the floor. I cross my arms behind my head, watching her tug my pants off and reach for my throbbing cock.

  When she takes it in her mouth, I groan. I tangle my fingers into her hair and close my eyes, wondering how I ever lived without her.

  As heat rushes through my veins, emotion swells in my chest. Rae makes me feel better than I even thought possible. She understands the importance of family, just like I do, and she puts it before everything.

  Before money. Before career. Before herself.

  She’s unlike anyone I’ve ever met before, and she’s all mine.

  As she moans, sucking me off and running her hands up my chest, emotion nearly chokes me. I pull her off, crushing her lips to mine and holding her close. She wraps her arms around my neck and grinds her center against mine.

  We don’t say a word. We don’t have to.

  I know she feels what I feel right now. The strength of emotion. The overwhelming need to show her what she means to me. The feeling that with her, there’s a future.

  Love.

  There’s no sense denying it. Love is what I feel. I’m falling for her harder than I ever thought I would. I care about her more than I thought was possible.

  I love Rae Montgomery—spawn of hell, worse than Hitler, and better than us all.

  As Rae reaches between us and positions me at her entrance, her eyes hooded and her lips glistening, I know she has my heart in the palm of her hand. She sinks down on top of me, ecstasy painted over her features. The two of us are connected. My heart swells.

  Pleasure erupts through me as I watch this gorgeous woman ride herself to orgasm on top of me. I reach down to tease her clit as she grinds on top of me, loving the sounds she makes when I touch her.

  “Rae,” I pant, pulling her down for another kiss.

  “Yeah?”

  “I—” I stop myself.

  I love you.

  The words are right there. Just on the tip of my tongue. Waiting to be spoken.

  But pleasure clouds my mind. Her body feels so good, and I know I’m going to explode.

  Then, I realize I’m not wearing a condom.

  “What, Benji?” she whispers, nipping the edge of my ear.

  I love you.

  “I’m going to come.”

  “I’m on the pill
. I want to feel it.”

  I groan, her words sending another wave of pleasure crashing through me.

  She’s wickedly sexy. So bad, she’s good.

  And she’s mine.

  Mine. Mine. Mine.

  I explode inside her, watching her eyes light up and pleasure erupt across her features. She keeps my hand against her clit and doesn’t stop until I feel her come, too.

  I love you.

  It was the wrong time to say it, but it doesn’t make it any less true. Rae is the woman for me. She’s the one I want to be with. The one I want to walk into the party with. The one whose name I want to scream from the rooftops.

  The one I want by my side, forever.

  As we lie there on the floor, arms wrapped around each other, I know it’s true.

  I love her with every bit of my heart.

  24

  Rae

  The next week goes by in a wonderful, happy daze. I spend my evenings with Benji, sleeping over at his place a couple of times a week. Sawyer and Lucy know I’m seeing him, but I don’t know if they realize how serious we are.

  How could they? We’ve only known each other a short while. The party will mark the end of my sixth week in Woodvale. I can’t believe it’s only been that length of time, when so much has happened.

  It feels like Benji and I are meant to be with one another. We fit together so easily, so perfectly, that it’s hard to imagine a time when we weren’t together.

  As Sarah’s surprise party approaches, Benji grows more nervous. It’s cute. He wants so badly for his sister to enjoy herself that he forgets that none of the details really matter. The fact that he’s putting in the time and effort to plan it for her will be enough, I’m sure of it.

  The party is planned for Saturday, and by Wednesday, Benji is a ball of nerves. I watch him agonize over how he’ll get his sister to the airfield, coming up with a thousand different scripts so she won’t guess there’s a surprise party waiting for her.

  “She’s going to love it, Benji,” I say, wrapping my arms around him. “Stop worrying.”

  Benji lets out a breath, nodding. “You’re right. It’s just a lot of pressure.”

  “It’s all in your head.” I smile. “Come on. Let’s eat.”

  We have dinner, and I nudge his foot under the table every time he gets that faraway look in his eye. He grins, nodding.

  “Fine. I’ll relax.”

  “Good. If I have to deal with this kind of stress for the next three days, I think I might explode.”

  Benji chuckles, and the tension on his face disappears. I sleep over at his house that night, feeling full of love and affection for this big, burly man with a gooey center.

  My life in Woodvale is completely different to how I grew up. It’s modest, family-oriented, and with a thriving community. I have more friends here than I had in all the years I spent in Houston.

  And I have Benji.

  I never thought feelings could blossom as quickly as this. He’s etched himself onto my heart, and I know there’s no getting him out.

  But on Friday, the day before his big party, everything changes. I’m standing in the kitchen and I can hear Lucy in the next room with Roman. I get a phone call that makes my heart sink. My mother’s name flashes on the screen, and I know soon, I’m going to have to tell her the truth about where I am, why I’m here, and how I hope they can come here, too. I want to do it in person, but every minute that I’m not telling my parents the truth, it feels wrong.

  “Rae,” my mother says, her voice hard. “You’ve been away for a long time. Your father and I have been waiting for you to come back.”

  I swallow past a lump in my throat. I’m sick of lying to them. This isn’t a vacation. It’s my life.

  “I’m with Lucy and Sawyer,” I blurt out.

  My mother is silent for a beat, and then makes a disapproving noise. “So it’s not a vacation at all.”

  “Well, no. I bought a business. I’m going to move away from Houston.”

  “Excuse me?” Her voice is icy. “You were supposed to discuss taking over your father’s business. There’s a spot on the board reserved for you. Your father planned his retirement around it. How will you do that from out of state?”

  “Mom, I don’t want to fight with you.”

  “We’re not fighting.”

  I sigh, pinching the bridge of my nose. “I don’t want our relationship to sour.”

  “Maybe you should have thought about that before you ran off and lied,” she snaps. “I thought you were different from your siblings. I’m disappointed, Rae.”

  My heart sinks. There go my hopes of reconciliation.

  Maybe Sawyer was right. Our parents have no interest in changing their opinions about us. They’ve become so accustomed to their own lifestyle that they can’t see any other way of living.

  Still, it’s too painful to admit. I want to believe that I can have a relationship with them. I don’t want to give up.

  “Can we talk about this in person?” My voice almost breaks on the last word. “My flight back down to Houston is a week from now. Or—do you want to come up here? You could meet your grandson.”

  My mother huffs. “I’m afraid we can’t, Rae. If you’d come to see us when I asked, I could have told you. Your father is retiring. We’ve bought a house in Milan and are moving there tomorrow. We can’t change our flights.”

  “You’re…” My voice trails off. “Milan, Italy?”

  “If you want to discuss these things, you’d better come down here before we leave. We had such high hopes for you, Rae. Your father put your name on the board and fought for the rest of the members to accept you. It wasn’t easy, let me tell you. No one wanted to give you the job.”

  Gee, thanks.

  My mother tuts. “He was counting on you, Rae. We even transferred the house here to you. It was going to be a special congratulations present from us. I’ll have to call the lawyer to change all that now, because evidently you want nothing to do with us.”

  “That’s not what I said, Mom. I want the opposite! I want you to meet your grandson and see Sawyer for the first time in nearly four years. I want everything to do with you.”

  She lets out a dramatic sigh. My heart tugs.

  I feel like I’m standing on the edge of a precipice. I have a decision to make. Do I hang up and turn my back on my parents? Do I try to bring them closer to my siblings?

  A crack forms right down the middle of my chest. My family is splitting, and I don’t know how to fix it. Maybe it was naive of me to think that I could, but I’m just not ready to give up. Everything I’ve done for the past three years—even longer! For my whole life!—has all been to bring us closer together.

  I want my parents to see Sawyer and Lucy for the amazing people they are, and I want my siblings to see my parents as more than just money-hungry vampires. I know in my heart of hearts that there’s good in everyone. I know that my family could have a functional relationship, if only they wanted to try.

  I close my eyes, not ready to admit that this family is broken. I’m not ready to give up. Not ready to turn my back on the people who gave me life. Not ready to choose between my parents and my siblings.

  I have to try.

  One last time, I need to talk to my mother and father, and ask them to come meet Sawyer and Lucy. I’ve always been the glue. It’s always been me.

  The reason I’ve been able to reconnect with Sawyer is because I gave it my best.

  Because I put in the effort and had hope it would work out.

  Don’t I owe my parents the same thing?

  I straighten my shoulders, clenching my jaw. “I’ll get on the next flight.”

  My mother huffs.

  “I’ll come down and see you before you leave, Mom.”

  “Well, it’s the least you could do,” she says. “After lying to us for weeks.”

  “I’m sorry,” I say. “I shouldn’t have lied. I’ll see you soon.”

  When I h
ang up the phone, I hold it to my chest and squeeze my eyes shut. I hear the creaking of a floorboard and look up to see Lucy in the kitchen doorway. Her eyebrows are drawn together, her shoulder-length hair tucked behind her ears.

  She tilts her head. “What about the party?”

  My heart squeezes so hard it hurts. I let out a long breath, shaking my head. “Benji will understand.”

  “Are you sure? This party is important to him. You’ve seen how stressed he is about the preparations.”

  “It’s just a party. Mom and Dad are leaving for Italy tomorrow. Benji will get it. He’ll know I need to see them before they leave.”

  “Will he?” Lucy’s brows almost touch, and worry worms its way into my heart. “Rae, I know you want to have a relationship with Mom and Dad, but look at the writing on the wall. Look at what they did to me. To Sawyer. To you. They’ve been trying to corner you into taking over the company even though you’ve told them time and time again that you don’t want to do that. They don’t respect you or your ambitions.”

  “They’re our parents, Lucy.”

  “They’re people. Just like you, and me, and Sawyer.” She pauses, letting out a sigh. “And Benji.”

  I know she’s right. I know it’ll hurt Benji to miss the party. I know I’m choosing my parents over him, but what choice do I have?

  Benji has been able to reconnect with his own father. He’s started mending that relationship, and his father is welcoming him with open arms. Don’t I deserve that chance, too? Shouldn’t Lucy and Sawyer get the opportunity to build a bridge as well?

  “He’ll understand,” I whisper.

  Lucy stares at me for a moment and finally nods. “Okay. If you say so.”

  “I have no choice,” I say. “I have to go and talk to them before they leave.”

  Lucy’s eyes fill with sadness. “There’s always a choice, Rae.”

  Her throat bobs as she swallows. Roman runs up behind her, and she paints a smile on her face before picking him up.

  I’m broken. Torn. Ripped in a million different directions.

  I know my parents hurt her. They threw her out and never looked back. They did the same to Sawyer.