by Emma Slate
Flynn and I exchanged a quick look before he went to the armoire and opened the double doors. He pushed aside the hanging clothes to reveal Katherine sitting on the floor, her legs pulled up to her chest, her face resting on her knees.
“Katherine,” Flynn said softly, crouching low to her level. She didn’t raise her head. “Katherine,” he said again, more forcefully. When she still didn’t look up, Flynn waved me over.
Flynn moved out of the way so that I could speak to Katherine. “Katherine,” I said. “It’s Barrett.” I touched the young woman’s shoulder. She was so slight, fragile, and delicate.
A shudder worked its way through Katherine’s body and she finally lifted her head. Her eyes were listless and dazed.
“How long have you been in here?” I asked gently, purposefully keeping my voice soft. She was like a frightened animal.
“I don’t know,” she said. She swallowed. “I heard shouting from the guards and then they left. I don’t know where they went. I crawled into the armoire and haven’t moved.”
“Come on,” I said, standing and reaching a hand down to help her up. “Let’s get you something to eat.”
Katherine looked at my hand before taking it. She swayed ever so slightly and she wouldn’t let go of me. I was suddenly feeling very protective of her, despite the fact that she’d abetted Winters. Though, to be fair, when she learned the truth behind Winters’s deceit, she did attempt to do the right thing and help reunite me with my son. She’d fallen for Winters’s charm and he’d used her naivete against her. She was only human.
Flynn followed as I took Katherine downstairs and into the living room. Ash held Hawk and was pacing back and forth in front of the unlit hearth. Hawk was screaming his head off.
“Here,” Ash said, thrusting Hawk at me. I took him and put him to my shoulder, but he only cried harder.
“Hungry,” I muttered. Hawk had terrible timing.
“Ash, will you take Katherine into the kitchen and get her something to eat?”
Ash nodded and Katherine trailed after her like a lost little duckling. When they were gone, I sat down on the couch, whipped open my shirt and prayed that Hawk wouldn’t make it any more difficult. He nuzzled around for a moment and then latched on.
“I need to check out the dungeon,” Flynn said, pitching his voice lower though there wasn’t a chance Katherine and Ash could hear us from the kitchen.
“Do you think Elliot—”
“Probably.”
“This mess just keeps getting bigger, doesn’t it?” I asked, glancing down at Hawk.
“Aye.” He came over to me and kissed me briefly on the lips before leaving.
I finished nursing Hawk and then changed him. Just as I was finishing up, the front door opened and Sasha and Duncan walked into the living room.
“We weren’t expecting you for another few hours,” I said, lifting Hawk and putting him to my shoulder again.
Duncan cleared his throat and looked away with an amused grin. “Barrett? You might want to re-button your shirt.”
“Oops,” I muttered. Exhaustion was finally getting the best of me. I set Hawk down in his carrier and quickly threw on my shirt.
“Where is everyone?” Sasha asked, his voice strangely low.
I looked at him, noting the height of color on his Slavic cheekbones, the banked desire in his eyes. He wasn’t even attempting to hide it. So I ignored it. I had bigger issues to contend with than Sasha’s unrequited love for me.
“Katherine and Ash are in the kitchen. Flynn is in the dungeon.”
“What’s he doing down there?” Duncan inquired.
I briefly recounted what we’d discovered from the moment we walked through the front door—the dogs, Katherine hiding in the armoire, the absence of the guards.
Duncan let out and impressive stream of Gaelic curses. Sasha added his own in Russian. We were a regular melting pot, I thought, snorting with dry humor.
“I don’t even know what to deal with first,” Duncan said.
“Say hello to your wife,” I suggested.
“Aye,” Duncan nodded before heading out of the living room.
“I guess that means I’ll go help your husband,” Sasha suggested.
“He’s been down there awhile. Which I guess means he found something.”
Sasha nodded. “Those were my thoughts.” He stared at me for a long moment and then his gaze dipped to Hawk who had finally settled down enough to nap. “I’m glad we found him. I’m glad he’s back where he belongs.”
“Thank you for being here,” I said sincerely. “It… well, thank you.”
“You’re welcome.”
I lifted Hawk in his carrier and said, “Tell Flynn I went up to our room. I’m about to pass out where I’m standing.”
“I will.”
As I walked past Sasha, his hand reached up to brush away a tendril of hair that had escaped the hairpin. “Don’t,” I whispered.
His hand dropped and he let me walk out of the living room. I refused to look back at him. I refused to see the look of despair on his face, the look I’d put there.
Our guest room had been untouched. There were no surprises when I entered it. I set Hawk down and immediately made my way to the bathroom. I shed my clothes and kicked them into a pile and took my hair down, setting the hairpin on the sink counter. I stared at my reflection, wondering if my eyes were a little harder, my resolve a little stronger, my soul a little blacker.
A decent person would feel remorse for the wrongs she’d done.
I wasn’t a decent person.
Turning on the shower, I made sure it was scalding before I stepped in. I tried to keep my bandaged arm from getting wet as I scrubbed my skin, wanting to remove any and all traces of the last three days. I would never be clean enough, so I would learn to live with the dirty, ugly parts of me.
Hawk was still asleep by the time I finished my shower. I picked him up and cradled him against my naked chest. I needed him as much as he needed me. Crawling beneath the covers, I settled down and quickly fell asleep. I didn’t wake up until a few hours later when the sky was dark. I briefly thought it might be nighttime, but then I heard the rumble of thunder.
“Did I wake you?” Flynn asked as he collapsed tiredly onto the bed.
“It’s okay,” I said, reaching a hand out to him.
“How’s Hawk?” The words came out muffled because Flynn spoke into the pillow. His eyes drifted closed, and I knew he was having trouble keeping them open.
“Fine.”
“Good. Found Elliot and the guards. Throats were slit.”
I sent a silent apology to the man who I’d promised a quick death. A wave of guilt shot through me when I thought of the guards who had died because they had been loyal to Flynn.
“Found Betty.”
“Please, don’t tell me—”
“She’s fine. She somehow got locked in the pantry.”
“Thank God. I can’t stomach more innocent blood being shed.”
“I know.” Flynn rolled over onto his back, looking more tired than I had ever seen him.
“So the last few hours were spent cleaning up?”
He nodded. “Aye. I’m too tired to talk anymore. Can we talk later?”
“Yes.” I leaned over and pecked him on the lips. He scooted closer and then his breathing evened out. I felt Hawk stir against my skin and sat up, changing the angle of him to rest against my breast. I wondered if we’d ever have a routine again. After he nursed, I got out of bed. My stomach was rumbling and so I threw on some clothes and padded downstairs, leaving Flynn to sleep for a few hours uninterrupted.
The house was quiet, and I expected the kitchen to be unoccupied, but Sasha was sitting at the table and staring out the window. The storm was full throttle now, but I found it soothing because it was something I could count on. There had been so little of that lately.
Without a word, I set Hawk in his arms so I could have my hands free to cook. “You hungry?”
I asked him.
Sasha didn’t answer me right away because he was staring down at Hawk, a strange look on his face. Finally, he looked up at me.
“Sorry. What did you say?” he asked.
“You hungry?” I repeated.
He nodded.
I went to the refrigerator to survey the ingredients I had on hand. I wanted a tried and true omelet and I had everything to make a really good one.
“Can I ask you something?” Sasha asked.
“Sure,” I said, grabbing a sharp knife and a cutting board.
“What’s your contingency plan? For Hawk?”
I frowned. “What do you mean?” I glanced up briefly from chopping chives. Sasha’s eyes were a bright, ice blue.
“If you and Campbell die,” he stated baldly.
“Can I ask you a question?” Without waiting for his nod I went on, “Why do you call Flynn by his last name?”
“If I think of him as ‘Flynn’ he might just become a friend. And I don’t know if I can be friends with him—not when I want his wife.”
I pointed the knife at him. “This knife is sharp.”
“You asked,” he pointed out.
“Yeah,” I sighed. “I did.”
“Now you answer my question. About Hawk.”
“I don’t know,” I said. “I used to think Ash and Duncan, but their lives aren’t very safe either. I don’t have family. I suppose there is Ash’s brother Jack. I trust him.”
“You still sound reluctant.”
I shrugged and dumped the chives into the buttered skillet. “I don’t like Ash’s parents. And if Hawk lived with Jack, they’d be around.”
“Hmm,” he said.
“I never wanted kids,” I voiced. “Never planned to have them.”
“What changed?” Sasha wondered.
“Hawk was an accident,” I said, not even feeling remorse over admitting it. It was the truth. “I felt differently—when I was forced to confront the actual situation, I made a choice I didn’t expect. And now, I have to think about things like who will raise my son if Flynn and I die.”
I whisked the eggs quickly and just long enough so that they’d come out fluffy before dumping them into the skillet. “What about you?”
“What about me?”
“Kids?”
“I think I need to find a woman first,” he said in a dry tone.
“Didn’t answer my question.” I shot him a look.
“We’ll see. At the moment, I think I’ve got bigger problems to worry about.”
Chapter 34
Sasha closed the doors to the living room giving us an added measure of privacy. He took a seat on the couch, settling in for our meeting.
“She’s asleep?” Flynn asked me.
I nodded. “The doctor gave her a mild sedative to help her sleep. She was only too eager to take it. She’s having nightmares.”
Last night, Katherine had awakened the entire house by screaming in her sleep. Her erratic sleep, combined with the rest of us running on empty left us barely functioning. We’d sent for the doctor at dawn, not caring about the early hour. After the doctor had seen to Katherine, he looked at my arm, gave me a shot of antibiotics and left. My injury hadn’t even fazed him, nor did he ask how I’d come by it. We’d all napped throughout the day but it wasn’t enough.
Hawk was asleep in the bassinet in the corner. I looked over at him again before leaning down to pet the lamb at my feet. Betty had taken to following me around. I didn’t blame her for feeling lost.
“I think Katherine should go back to her family,” Ash said. “She’s not a threat to us. And with Winters gone…”
Flynn nodded. “Aye. She needs to go back to her family.”
I frowned at him. “That’s not what I was expecting you to say.”
Flynn stood by the lit fireplace, a glass of scotch in his hand. “The only people I trust are in this room—aside from Ramsey—and he’s still on Orkney lying low.”
Flynn had told Duncan about the attack on Ramsey’s life, but the younger Buchanan was resilient and safe. “Should we bring him home?” Duncan wondered.
“No. I have an idea,” Flynn said.
Everyone glanced at me. “Don’t look at me. He hasn’t told me anything yet.”
We all turned back to Flynn and gave him our undivided attention. He swirled his drink and stared at its contents before speaking. “We still don’t know who’s trying to take over the SINS, but we do know he tried to have the Buchanan line taken out. It’s safe to say he wants me out of the way, too. They don’t want any opposition. Arlington is playing every side, every angle, but I’m sure he’s been tipped off that we’re on to him. He’s probably gone underground.”
I nodded. Everything he said made sense.
Flynn took a deep breath. “The only way to bring out the traitor is to give him what he wants.”
“The SINS?” Ash asked in confusion.
Flynn nodded. “Aye.”
“But how do we do that?” she wondered.
Flynn’s eyes met mine when he replied, “We have to die. The three of us. Ramsey, Duncan and myself.”
“You want to stage your deaths,” I said in complete understanding.
“Aye,” Flynn said.
“Bloody brilliant,” Duncan said.
“You can’t be serious,” Ash scoffed.
“Completely,” Flynn said.
“But how?” Ash asked in exasperation. “How are you going to pull this off?”
“There was an attempt on Ramsey’s life,” Flynn said. “We just let people think he was taken out. And before we take Katherine back to her family, we tell her. She’ll take care of word of mouth.”
“And that will ensure that attention is focused on taking out Flynn and me,” Duncan said. “We’ll stage our deaths together so it looks like they succeeded. I’m thinking a big explosion.”
Flynn and Duncan chuckled. Ash had her own explosion. “How the hell can you find this funny?”
“Because we aren’t really going to die,” Duncan assured her.
“And what do you expect me to do? Wait around like a wife waiting for her husband to come back from war?”
Duncan rose from his seat next to her and jerked Ash to her feet. He tugged her out of the living room even as she protested, loudly and vocally.
“We won’t be seeing them again tonight,” Sasha muttered.
“Probably not,” I agreed.
“Why are you so calm?” Sasha asked.
“Because there’s nothing to worry about,” I said. I looked at Flynn. “Right?”
“Aye,” Flynn said. He ran a hand down his stubbly jaw, black whiskers raspy against his fingers.
“What?” I demanded.
“I want you and Ash to take Hawk and go to New York.”
My eyes widened so much I thought they’d pop out of my head. “You want—”
“That’s my cue,” Sasha said, rising and departing quickly. The living room doors shut again and Flynn and I were left in privacy.
“How can you suggest that?” I asked standing up, ready to battle.
Flynn came to me, took my hand and hauled me up towards his hard body. “You and Hawk aren’t safe here, Barrett.”
“And you think we’ll be safer in New York?”
“Aye. You’ll stay at The Rex. Brad will be close by. It will make me feel better.”
I slid my hands up his arms to loop around his neck. “And I’m just supposed to go to New York while you and Duncan enact this plan to fake your deaths?”
“We’ve dealt with worse separations,” he said, his mouth coming for my lips.
“Aye,” I whispered, throwing that word back at him.
Flynn’s lips covered mine, his tongue demanding entry. I gave in, sinking into his body. We struggled out of our clothes and Flynn took me on the bearskin rug in front of the fireplace. Our coupling was fierce and passionate. We were saying goodbye, not knowing when we’d see each other again.
Flynn and I said goodbye to each other all night, but we ended up moving to our guest room and a bed. It was much more comfortable, but no less passionate. Hawk slept in our room in his bassinet.
Near dawn, Flynn took me into his arms; I pressed my head to his chest and fell asleep to the sound of his heartbeat in my ear. It felt like no time had passed when I was being shaken awake.
“Hmm?” I strived to open my eyes as I was tugged from unconsciousness. “Is it Hawk?”
“No, hen,” Flynn said, his voice raspy. “It’s time for you to get up.”
When I registered that my son didn’t need me, I rolled over and grasped Flynn’s pillow and brought it to my chest. “Few more minutes.”
Flynn was insistent. “A lot has to get done today, love.”
I flipped onto my back and managed to crack my eyes open. “We’re leaving today, aren’t we?”
He nodded. “You’re going to New York with Ash and Hawk.”
“I know it’s best for us—safer,” I said. “But I hate being separated from you.”
“I do too,” he assured me. “But I have to know you both are safe. And Scotland isn’t safe for you right now.”
I threw my legs over the side of the bed, realizing I was still naked. A shiver worked its way down my spine as I got up and went to get some clothes. I checked on Hawk, but he was still sound asleep.
“We need to discuss something,” he said.
“I’m listening.”
“I want Sasha to go with you. Back to New York.”
I paused. “You need him here. There are so few people you can trust at the moment, and he’s one of them. You need him here with you and Duncan,” I insisted. “I’ll be in The Rex. Brad will be there, so will Lacey. I’ll have people.”
“Barrett,” he began.
“Please, Flynn,” I begged. “I’m leaving Scotland to protect our son. But I need you protected too.”
“Sasha’s done enough for me. I can’t ask him this.”
“Then I will.”
“You don’t fight fair,” Flynn said.
“Do you?” I shot back.
“You fight to survive. At any cost.”
He cradled my cheek in his large hand. I closed my eyes briefly, wanting to soak up the last few moments together. Hawk began to cry and Flynn leaned over to kiss my lips.