Covert Desires

by Sondae Bennett

  The click of the front door closing caught her attention. Moments later, a car engine turned over in the driveway. A quick glance out the window showed Jason and Ethan leaving.

  Damn. She’d waited too long.

  The door swung open and Danny stalked into the room. He didn’t look happy, but the moment he saw her, his entire body relaxed. Then tightened as his relief gave way to heat.

  An answering fire lit through her blood until all she could think about was sex. Sex with Danny. Seconds before, she’d have laughed if someone suggested the mere sight of the man would ruin her control. Boy, would she have been wrong. But how had her lust surged so strong? If felt almost as if someone else controlled her mind.

  His gaze turned predatory as his lips curled in a wide smile. Then he started stalking her. Amber narrowed her eyes, trying to figure out where he’d go next. She faked right and then ran left, but he was too clever for her, catching her as she tried to run past the bed, and throwing her onto it.

  Giggling, Amber watched as he reached for his fly. She bit her lip as her eyes followed his hand downward over his muscle-packed chest dusted with coarse brown hair. Her blood boiled. For him. Only for him. She arched up as his hand reached the middle of his stomach, imagining he was petting her instead of himself.

  “If you don’t pick up the pace, I swear I’m going to throw you on the bed and have my wicked way with you.”

  His eyebrows flew upward. Hell, she was even surprised. She hadn’t meant to say that. Hadn’t even known she had that growly tone in her. But impatience and lust were crowding her inside.

  And damn it, his hand stopped moving.

  “Is that so?” Laughter shone out of his eyes.

  Well, if she wanted something done right, looked like she’d have to do it herself. Snatching her robe off, Amber threw it to the side as she grabbed Danny and pulled him onto the bed. She tore at the button and zipper of his jeans, desperate for the sight of him, the feel of him.

  “Easy, honey.” Danny placed a hand on her arm and she shuddered, closing her eyes as a little bit of his calm invaded her frantic energy.

  “I need you,” she grated out.

  It was true. Deception or not, whatever secrets stood between them, nothing was more important than the torrid emotions flooding her in an endless wave. No one had made her feel so needy before. Or so perfect.

  Danny made her feel perfect. And if she had to figure out what secrets he held and risk losing him, she wanted to feel that way at least once more. Because somehow she knew, no one else would ever make her feel the way she felt when she was with him.

  He stared deep into her eyes for a moment, before nodding and quickly ridding himself of his jeans. She sighed in relief as his cock came into view, already hard and purple with need. Thank God he hadn’t bothered with underwear.

  The warmth of his flesh as she gripped him sent a punch of pure desire to her gut. She leaned down until she could run her tongue up the soft underside of his member, from balls to tip. His groan fired her blood, and he clenched the bed sheets. Last night, he’d made her squirm in desire. Made her so crazy she wanted to scream. Now, she wanted to return the favor.

  Leaning down, she took him into her mouth until he hit the back of her throat. His hands tangled in her hair, not pulling or pushing, but gripping hard. She moved back up and swirled her tongue over his head. Then took him deep once more.

  This time, when he hit the back of her throat, she swallowed against him, breathing through her nose. Under her, his hips jerked, driving him farther into her mouth. A drop of pre-cum coated her tongue, salty and sweet all at the same time.

  She felt the raging lust he struggled to hold back, as strong as if his emotions were projected straight into her mind. She’d never felt this in-tune with someone else before. So aware of his every want. Rising up so she had only the tip in her mouth, Amber sucked deeply and heard his growl of desire. An animalistic noise that had her own desire spiraling down. She reached down and massaged his balls as she worked his shaft. The more she did for him, the more turned on she became.

  Her core clenched in desire as another bead of pre-cum dotted the tip. Moisture pooled between her thighs. She needed him to fill her. Releasing him with a pop, Amber sat up and stared into his eyes.

  “Please tell me you have another condom.”

  He groaned, then pointed at his discarded jeans. “Check my wallet.” She scrambled for it, breathing a sigh of relief when she finally found one hidden in the back credit card slot. She was clean and on the pill, but didn’t know if Danny had ever been tested. Besides, one could never be too careful.

  Amber rolled it over his member, squeezing once before releasing him and straddling his hips. Staring into his eyes, she lowered herself onto him.

  His cock stretched her, and she closed her eyes as he filled her inch by delicious inch. She shuddered as her nerve endings sizzled where they were connected. Damn, he was big. She gasped as he hit a spot inside that caused her toes to curl.

  The heat of his hands cupped her breasts, his thumbs running over her peaked nipples. She arched into his touch, her hips bucking.

  The motion caused him to move deeper inside her, and elicited a gasp. From her. From him. His growl sent a wave of passion crashing over her. She thrashed against him, desperate for more. His hips rose to meet hers in a frantic rhythm.

  Tension curled into a ball inside her. So close. Her muscles tightened, but the brink of ecstasy was just out of reach. A sob of frustration escaped her as her hips jolted forward, losing their rhythm. The peak of passion was right there, just out of reach.

  He slid his hands downward, grasping her hips and guiding her. She put her hands on his shoulders and gave him control. He pulled her down hard, his cock plunging deep into her depths. Her fingers curled, driving her nails into his flesh. Another sob escaped her when he pulled out. The feeling of him balls deep inside her had almost been more than she could stand, but when he retreated she felt empty. Lost.

  Then he plunged back in, pushing her over the edge. She cried out as pleasure swamped her, dragging her under as wave after wave of delight passed through her. She rode it out, Danny’s hands guiding her until his body stiffened and his cock jerked inside her.

  Sated, she collapsed on top of him and dragged air into her lungs.

  Danny couldn’t be evil, she thought as the sweat evaporated and cooled her skin. He just couldn’t be. After all she’d been through in her life, she deserved this happiness. She deserved him. This one thing was hers, and she wouldn’t let anyone take it away.

  Chapter 13

  What the hell was she doing? The door to Danny’s apartment swung open, and Amber quickly stood and pocketed her tools.

  This was stupid, and reckless, and could ruin everything that had been building between them. She quickly glanced down the hallway, but no one was near.

  When her boss had suggested–no, not suggested, insisted–that she bug Danny’s place, she’d thought he was crazy. At first, she’d flat out refused. But then the conversation he’d had with his brothers in her living room came back to her. And the director had been so unrelenting and so certain that he could be the key to the unrest in the area.

  Still, what she was doing didn’t feel right. Everything in her rebelled at the idea of deceiving him until she literally had to force herself over the threshold.

  Once the door was firmly between her and the outside world with the lock engaged, she breathed a sigh of relief. At least now she could pretend this was just another perp’s apartment she was bugging. Could remove Danny from the equation and be the rational agent she always used to be.

  Except the whole place smelled like him. A purely male scent that caused a flood of desire to rush through her. And damn it, were her panties wet? She rubbed her thighs together, but sure enough, a suspicious moisture clung between her legs. What was wrong with her? Sure the sex was great, but this was intense in a way she’d never experienced before.

  Shakin
g off her discomfort, she stepped farther into the room. Time to get to work. She looked for a good location to plant the device, but ended up standing in the middle of the room like an idiot. What was she doing? She trusted Danny, didn’t she? Whatever his secret was, he’d tell her in time. Right?

  It probably was something personal, not something dangerous. It could be anything. He could be adopted, or could have a terrible middle name. Maybe he was shooting blanks. But then why were his siblings so upset he hadn’t told her before sleeping with her…

  Amber stared down at the tiny black circle in her hand. Even though her conscience was screaming at her, telling her the wrongness of what she was about to do, her boss was right. This bug might be the only way to rule Danny out as dangerous. And if his secret wasn’t a threat to the country, she’d apologize. No harm, no foul.

  Firming her resolve, Amber crossed the room to the hideous fake flower arrangement on the table. She lifted it up and raised her hand to stick the bug to the bottom, when something caught her attention. She froze, listening carefully.

  Voices echoed in the hallway as someone stomped up the stairs to Danny’s apartment. One of the voices sounded an awful lot like Danny.

  “Shit. Oh shit shit shit.” Placing the flowers carefully back on the table, Amber turned in a circle, desperate for a place to hide. A key slid into the lock, the sound echoing around the room like a cannon.

  The kitchen pantry stood wide open, but offered the only protection close enough to reach. Amber dove for it and shut the door as quickly and quietly as she could. Just in time, as the front door swung open and Danny stalked inside.

  Now she just had to hope he didn’t want a snack, because if he did, she was well and truly screwed.

  * * * *

  Need a drink, Danny thought, heading straight for the fridge. He swung the front door closed behind him, knowing his siblings were mere steps behind him. Hopefully it would be a deterrent, but he knew he was dreaming.

  “We need to talk about this.” He groaned, leaning his head against the fridge. If he didn’t strangle his sister after this, it would be a miracle.

  “Butt out, Laurie.”

  “She’s right.”

  Great, now Jason was starting in. The two of them had been ganging up on him all night. Add to that Ethan’s and Julie’s sympathetic, but censuring, gazes drilling into him, and Danny was about to explode. Last time he’d allowed himself to get this angry, he’d accidentally broken Julie’s arm. He’d never forgiven himself for that.

  Which was one more reason for the beer. If he got drunk enough, they could yell at him all they wanted and his wolf would be fine.

  “We can help you. Let us help you.” Julie’s soft voice broke through the haze of frustration he’d built around himself, and made him feel like a heel.

  He turned and saw concern reflected on all of their faces. Concern for him. Because this time, he’d really screwed up. His anger turned inward. How could he have done that, not just to himself, but to Amber? How could he mate her without even telling her what he was?

  “What am I going to do?” he whispered.

  “She doesn’t know anything about us?” Julie asked, her gentle hands leading him to a seat at the table.

  “No. I totally lost it. It was as if, for the first time in my life, the wolf inside me was in complete harmony with the man, and it all centered around her. I knew she was my mate. And I knew my soul would never be complete without her. And I just…” He couldn’t put into words the complete lack of control he’d experienced.

  “I know what you mean. When Gwen ran off on me… I had a hard time controlling it, too. But hey, if I can come back from that, you can come back from this. We just have to find a way to break the news of magical people who can shift into wolves to her in a gentle way,” Ethan joked.

  “Oh, yeah. Easy as pie.”

  “It will be. At least compared to the rest. After that, you have to explain to her how she’s your mate and bound to you for the rest of your natural, or should I say supernatural, lives.” Laurie wiggled his eyebrows at him.

  “Supernatural lives,” Julie giggled. “I’m so using that.”

  Even Danny felt himself smiling despite himself. Trust his family to annoy him to death one moment and joke with him the next.

  With a groan, his head thunked down on the table. “It’s hopeless.”

  “Oh come now, all that isn’t so bad.” Jason patted him on the shoulder with enough force he thought he heard something crack. “The hard part is going to be doing all that in a way that won’t cause her to run back to the FBI with news of the, how did Ethan put it, magical people who can shift into wolves?”

  Someone sucked in a breath as if they hadn’t remembered she was an agent, but when he glanced up, everyone seemed to be looking at somebody else. He shrugged it off as his nerves playing tricks on him.

  And he was nervous. Whatever he did now was crucial. Could mean the difference between keeping Amber, or losing her forever. His awareness of her was super sensitive. He could swear he smelled her on him. Smelled her arousal. Suddenly, a night apart didn’t seem like such a good idea. Despite needing the time to muddle his way out of this mess he’d made.

  “And how exactly do you propose I do that, Jason? She doesn’t even know that I know she’s an agent. Not to mention the fact that I’ve been spying on her from the first day to make sure she didn’t learn about the magical wolf people.”

  His siblings fell silent, all joking aside. Without having to ask, he knew none of them had any clue how to start untangling the knots he’d tied in his relationship.

  The scrape of the pantry door sliding open had him looking up in surprise. Shock held him in his chair as Amber stepped into the room. But the hurt look on her face forced him to his feet. Dear God, what was she doing here?

  “You knew?” The ragged edge of her voice told him how hurt she was. “This whole time, you knew what I was. This whole time…”

  Danny crossed to her, wanting to sweep her into his arms, to hold her until the pained look of betrayal left her face. As his arms closed around her, Amber pushed him away with enough force to have him stumbling backward.

  “Deceiving you was killing me. And this whole time you were doing the same fucking thing. Did it bother you at all? Did you even care about me? Or was I just a job?” She stopped and looked over his shoulder. “Oh God, is that why you slept with me?”

  “No!” He reached for her again, but she backed away from him until he dropped his arms.

  “Damn you.” Tears glittered in her eyes. The hurt was gone, replaced by an anger so deep, his breath froze in his throat. Her face contorted in a snarl. “I trusted you. Damn you to hell.”

  “Amber, honey–” His hands itched to reach for her again, but he knew she’d only back away. His chest hurt as he stared at her. She looked broken. He had to find some way to reach her. Some way through the wall of hurt quickly shutting him out.

  “Aren’t you going to mention anything about the magical people who shift into wolves?” Laurie asked behind him.

  He spun around, ready to throw her out of his apartment. Now was not the time for jokes. She didn’t even glance at him, but gazed at Amber with a curious expression on her face.

  “I don’t give a crap about what you do on your free time,” Amber said.

  Danny spun around at the sarcastic reply, hoping against hope that she was calming down, but her shattered pose and wet eyes told him differently. She wasn’t crying, but her eyes glittered with unshed tears.

  “Baby, please let me explain.”

  The humorless sound of her laugh made him wince. Through their bond, he could tell she was hanging onto control by a thin thread.

  “Explain. Explain what exactly? How you used me? How you pretended you cared for me, pretended I was special to you? How you fucked me just so you could…what? Make sure I kept my nose out of where it didn’t belong?” She stopped and turned her head to the side. When she turned back, one
tear tracked a silent path down her cheek. “Did you even care for me at all? Was I anything to you besides an enemy?”

  “Of course.” Danny started toward her, but she was already running out the door. He stood still for a moment, his soul splitting in half as he watched her leave. His wolf clawed at his chest, frantic with the need to chase after her.

  “What the hell are you waiting for?” Jason asked, shoving him toward the door.

  He turned toward his siblings and let his despair shine out of his eyes. “How can I get through to her?”

  “You can’t if you don’t try,” Julie replied softly.

  She was right. He’d make her listen. Running out of the room, he threw off his clothes as he made his way outside. Once he was in the open night air, he let the shift overcome him. Fur swept over his body and his bones cracked in the night air, bringing him to his hands and knees as they reformed in the shape of his wolf. Warmth filled him as his muscles stretched.

  As soon as he was able, he took off after her retreating taillights. He’d chase her to the ends of the Earth, if need be. Whatever he had to do to make her see how much she meant to him, he’d do and more. She was his mate, and wherever she went, that was where he belonged.

  * * * *

  Amber wiped her nose on her sleeve as she sped down the road. Her dry sobs filled the cab of the car, and her eyes burned with unshed tears. Once she got back to the cottage, she’d indulge in the crying jag to end all crying jags. Until then, she had to hold it together.

  Her chest felt tight, and tightened more each time she tried to take a breath in. She knew she was on the verge of a panic attack, but that was as far as rational thought would get her.

  What a fool she’d been. Imagining he cared for her. Imagining someone like Danny could look past the scars on her body, or her false exterior and see the real woman underneath. Her mind drifted back to that morning, when she’d sped out of the bathroom because she didn’t want to hear whether or not he loved her yet. In her heart, she’d actually believed he could. More fool her. A sob escaped and she bit her lip to keep from screaming.