Nobody's Hero

by Kallypso Masters

  “I know. I just…”

  He picked up the fork and stabbed a couple pieces of pasta holding them up to her mouth until she accepted them. Everyone was taking such good care of her, so she could take care of Adam. This rag-tag family Adam had brought together would be lost without him.

  Visions of the blood pooling beside Adam’s neck as he lay motionless curdled her stomach. Karla couldn’t block the images from her mind. Everything had happened so quickly. Adam had come running and tried to calm her fears. He’d distracted the cougar, which chased and attacked him. She’d tried to wrestle the cat off him, until Marc had pulled her away so Damián could shoot the beast.

  The memories led to a roiling stomach and, after a couple more forkfuls, Karla took the fork from Luke, fearing she’d get sick if she ate another bite. But she appreciated his support.

  “Just remember, cara, he’s still strong or he wouldn’t be here,” Marc said, lapsing into his native Italian endearment. “You just wait. He’ll be back to his old self again, ordering everyone around and running his tight ship, same as always.”

  Yes, but without me.

  Luke took advantage of a lull in the table talk and struck up a conversation with Cassie, possibly trying to draw her out of her silence. Karla was surprised at his knowledge on the subject of fine art. He worked as a carpenter and woodworker. Of course, he’d shown a knack for designing some of the unique pieces of equipment used in the club.

  Cassie surprised her by asking, “How do you know so much about art?”

  “I was an art major in college. They didn’t have the industrial arts major I wanted at the University of Texas, but I’m really glad I chose studio art instead. It has helped me a lot with my work.”

  Cassie gave him a hesitant smile, then her brow furrowed and she retreated again, focusing on her food. Well, it was a start at least. Maybe the two of them had found common ground to build on.

  Karla’s eyelids burned. She wished she and Adam could find common ground. Karla laid her fork on the table, no longer able to eat for the anxious churning in her stomach.

  Chapter Two

  Karla’s neck ached from sleeping curled up in the chair beside Adam’s bed yet again. After two weeks of bedside vigils—first in the hospital and then at home—it was a wonder she could move her neck. She glanced at him, all stretched out on the other side of his king-sized bed. His chest rose and fell in rhythmic breathing. As usual, he slept without a shirt; the sheet and blanket pulled down to his waist. His pecs were ripped, those delicious nips begging to be sucked to granite-hard peaks, just the way she’d always fantasized. His body looked as firm and tight as she’d imagined them all those years ago. She smiled when she remembered wanting to try to bounce a quarter off his chest and licking his pecs the first time she’d seen him without his shirt.

  Oh, don’t go there, Kitty.

  She hadn’t reverted to her high-school nickname in awhile. Must be because Cassie was here and still called her that. Karla looked longingly at the large bed. Surely Adam wouldn’t mind if she lay down on this side. There easily was room for three people in the bed. She was exhausted and hadn’t been able to sleep more than in small snatches since the attack.

  Karla lifted the sheet and blanket and crawled between the sheets. Heaven. Funny how a bed could make such a difference in the ability to relax. Knowing Adam slept peacefully beside her and was on the mend, reminded her that her time here was limited. She would take what she could get. If this would be the only time she “slept” with Adam, then so be it.

  The thought that he didn’t want her in his house or club anymore and had said as much at the hospital caused an ache in her chest. He hadn’t mentioned it again since they’d brought him home—and she certainly didn’t bring it up—but she wouldn’t continue to live with him as she had been. Wanting, needing, but having him ignore her. The pain of having him so near and not being able to touch him, to love him, was more than she could bear.

  Except for tonight. Even though he slept beside her, they still couldn’t embrace him. But she could pretend. They looked like any married couple sleeping side by side after many years together. Not touching, but still irrevocably connected. Tonight, she felt closer to Adam than ever.

  At last, the sleep that had eluded her since Adam was injured beckoned. She surrendered...

  Adam’s hard body nestled against her backside, his arm curled around her waist with his firm hand cupping her breast. She’d had erotic dreams of Adam before and gave in to this one, snuggling against him. His erection—larger than she’d dreamed it in the past—pressed against her ass. The hand on her breast stirred and his finger and thumb rolled her nipple, causing her hips to jerk back against his hard penis.

  Karla gasped. Too real. Her eyes flew open to find herself in near darkness, but she came fully awake in an instant. This was no dream.

  More like a dream come true.

  Adam!

  He continued to play with her nipple, teasing it to the point of pain, sending jolts of electricity to her girly bits. She held her breath, not wanting to wake him. Not wanting to stop him.

  Touch me.

  His hand left her breast and roamed across her abdomen. Oh, dear Lord, had he heard her silent plea? Or had she spoken the plaintive words aloud? She raised her leg, tenting the covers, giving him easier access. Usually she slept in the nude, but the thigh-length t-shirt had been her concession to decency while watching over Adam. She wore no panties and knew she was seconds away from having Adam’s fingers on her…

  Touch me there, Adam.

  His hand continued to glide down her body, over her hips, onto her bare thigh, then he stopped. No! Not yet! He stroked her inner thigh and pulled her legs even more open, then his hand moved upward. Her heart pounded in her ears.

  Oh, yes, love. There.

  If he stopped now, she’d surely die. She licked her lips, which had gone dry. She realized she’d been panting like a dog in heat. Oh, dear Lord. She should wake him. This wasn’t right. He didn’t even know he was with her. He could be dreaming of Joni.

  No. She wouldn’t think about Joni now. Joni was dead. Joni couldn’t give Adam what he needed anymore.

  But would Karla stop him, even if she wanted to? She needed his hands on her so badly. Had craved this moment for so many years. When his finger slid over her clit, she gasped. So sensitive. The little nubbin went into spasms. She’d touched herself there before with her fingers and her vibrator, but no one else had ever done so. What a difference—not knowing how he would caress her, where, when, how much pressure.

  His finger delved between her curly folds and pressed against her pussy’s very wet opening. He entered her, filling her tight hole, but didn’t go far before he pulled out again and returned to touching her clit. She’d dreamed of having Adam touch her like this for so long. Now he was doing just what she wanted. She’d always known one day he would make love to her.

  But not like this.

  She had to wake him. Whether he was in a deep sleep or under the influence of the pain killers, it was wrong to take advantage of him like this. She scooted onto her back to face him and he nuzzled her neck, his whiskers scratching against the tender skin there. Her clit throbbed against his finger.

  “Oh, God, Karla. Now you’ve invaded my fucking dreams.”

  Karla? He’d said her name! Adam was dreaming about her. Not Joni. A feeling of euphoria spread through her that felt like the one she felt when she hit a particularly high note with perfect pitch. She relaxed and smiled, wrapping her arms around his neck. His finger continued to stroke her clit, and she rocked against his hand, moaning.

  Don’t stop, Adam.

  Her heartbeat sent a delicious throbbing to her clit. More. Oh, dear Lord, she wanted so much more of him. As if he heard her, he raised his body, groaning in pain. Marc had said he should avoid strenuous activity. Oh, God. How strenuous was too strenuous?

  All lucid thought vanished as his body hovered over her, his finger insi
de her. Instead, she thought about whether she should stroke him; how she should move. With tentative fingers, she stroked his bulging, corded biceps, shivering at the raw power there, despite his having been weakened from the cougar attack.

  “So wet,” his voice rasped.

  His finger entered her again. Then another finger. Oh, God, yes. She bucked her hips up against him.

  “I can’t wait, kitten. I promise I’ll go slower next time.”

  Kitten. The endearment melted her into a pool of Jell-O.

  He pushed his sweatpants off his hips, releasing his penis. His very hot, hard penis which now pressed against her pussy. He rubbed the tip against her cleft, from her vagina to her clit, again and again. Oh, yes. At last, he was pressing against her pussy, pushing himself inside, slowly filling her. Her hips bucked up toward him, taking him deeper.

  “So fucking tight.”

  His finger stroked her clit and she moaned as waves of sensation spread through her. She felt as if she would fly off the bed.

  “Yes, Adam. Don’t stop.” His finger moved faster. “Oh, God!” She moved her hands up to stroke Adam’s chest. His pecs felt like steel. “Oh, please, don’t stop!” Her hips began to buck even harder, against his finger, his penis.

  “Come for me, kitten.”

  His finger against her clit stroked faster, sending waves of electricity throughout her pelvis. “Yes. Oh, Adam, yesss!” She found herself just on the edge of a precipice, hovering above the unknown. Step off. Fly. Her breathing stopped. “Oh, oh, ohhhh!” So close. She wrapped her arms tighter around his neck, pulling him down to kiss her. With a groan, he rammed his penis fully inside her.

  Her scream of pain filled his mouth and brought his body to a halt. The unanticipated pain registered in her mind a half-second later. Tears stung her eyes. She’d read about the breaking of a woman’s hymen and how much it was supposed to hurt, but she’d had no idea. Luckily, just as quickly as the pain had come, it receded.

  “No fucking way.”

  The physical pain was replaced by an ache even more hurtful. Adam’s remorse. She opened her eyes to look up at him and found Adam staring down at her in disbelief as realization dawned.

  She whimpered. She wanted. She needed.

  “Adam, I saved myself for you. I wanted only you. Please don’t pull away from me now.”

  The look of torture and remorse on his face hurt exponentially more than the hurt she’d felt a moment ago. “What have I done, Karla?”

  “Nothing I didn’t want you to do.” She reached up and stroked the planes of his beautiful face. “I wanted you to make love to me more than anything, Adam.”

  But not as much as I want you to love me.

  “I’ve never wanted anything more in my entire life.” She tilted her hips, wincing at the residual tenderness, but she wanted Adam to finish what he’d started, damn it. “Please, don’t leave me like this.”

  Please don’t leave me—ever.

  With a groan, he lowered his forehead to hers, gasping for air from his earlier exertions. Then his hips began to move as he pulled out of her. No, Adam! She clenched her vagina around his penis, not wanting to let him go. When he thrust back inside her, it caused some discomfort, but she controlled her facial expression, not wanting to reveal any negative emotion for fear he would stop. Oh, she didn't want him to stop. She smiled, then gasped and held on when his finger stroked the bundle of nerves that had become even more sensitive than before. She tried to evade his finger.

  “Stop. It’ll be better for you this way.”

  Trusting him, she spread her legs open wider and wrapped them around his waist, resting her heels at the small of his back, hoping she’d avoided the places where he’d been mauled by the cougar. He pulled out and rammed himself inside her even deeper, forcing the air from her lungs. So full.

  “Oh, yes!”

  At her cry, his movements increased. The feeling of oneness with him was unexpected. Her Adam, at last making love to her. She raised her hips to meet him, stroke for stroke. His finger slid along the side of her clit, not quite touching it directly now, matching the movements of his hips. Pressure built up inside her again, but even more intense than the last time. As he continued to thrust in and out, his finger touched her clit and she climbed toward the precipice again.

  “Oh, Adam! Please don’t stop!”

  “As if I could.” His voice was raspy with sleep, or perhaps the drugs. But he knew it was Karla he made love with. She smiled.

  His strokes increased again. Hips. Finger. Penis.

  “Come with me.”

  His finger applied direct, rapid pressure against her clit. “Yes! Oh, Adam! Yesssss! Oh, God, yesss!” She hurtled over the precipice as her insides exploded. Her hips convulsed against him and her pussy clamped onto his throbbing penis as he spurted inside her. She screamed her final release.

  Adam grunted as he pumped inside her. “God, yes, Karla!” Then he stopped abruptly, his breathing labored as he recovered from the exertion, the first real exercise he’d had since before the attack. “Aw, fuck.”

  Aw, yes, Adam. A great fuck.

  “Tell me you’re on birth control.”

  What? Her mind was still floating back to earth from the experience and he wanted to talk about contraception? “Birth control?”

  He looked down at her, worry and regret in his eyes. She didn’t want him to regret anything about this beautiful moment. But she had to be honest. “I’m sorry…No, I’m not.” Not sorry in the least. If a baby came as a result of what they’d just done, then it would be the most precious gift anyone had ever given her. Even if Adam didn’t want it—or her—she would love his baby for the rest of her life.

  He rolled off her, the friction of his penis pulling out of her causing her to wince again. When he covered his eyes with the crook of his elbow, a tear slid from the corner of her eye and she brushed it away before he could see it. He already regretted what they’d done together. She needed to get away from him before she started crying—or decked him. Karla swung her legs over the side of the bed.

  “I’m sorry, Karla. I never wanted that to happen.”

  He doesn’t want me. Reeling from his rejection, she stood up and ran to her bedroom, feeling a sticky wetness between her thighs. First, a shower. But she wouldn’t be able to wash away the feeling of dirtiness his callousness had made her feel.

  No!

  No way would she let Adam’s feelings of regret, guilt, and remorse taint the beauty of what they’d just experienced. His lovemaking had been the most wonderful thing to happen in her life. Even better than anything she’d fantasized about all these years. She would hold onto the memory of this night forever.

  * * *

  Jesus Fucking Christ, what had he done? A virgin. He’d had an inkling she was one, because she’d never spoken or written about any men in her life. He’d avoided her for months, because he sure as hell had had no intention of finding out. Not with his god-damned dick, anyway.

  Not like this.

  She was young enough to be his daughter. Shit, she’d come to him for comfort and now he’d taken advantage of her. What the fuck was he going to do if she got pregnant? He wasn’t worried about STDs. He was always so damned careful—well, until tonight—and she’d obviously never had sex with a man before. God damn it. What if she got pregnant? No matter what she would choose to do about a baby, it would change her life forever.

  Not to mention his.

  God damn it. What had just happened in here? He’d finally started to regain some strength, most likely from the crunches he’d been doing when Marc and Karla weren’t around scolding him like a child. But he’d overdone it yesterday and had to take one of those damned pain pills. Clearly, he’d been out of it—well, until he was into it. Into her. He’d regained his faculties PDQ, but it was already too late.

  Why the fuck hadn’t he trusted his gut last July and defied Damián when he’d insisted on hiring her after her audition? He should have sent
her home to Chicago immediately. No, instead, he’d let Damián hire her to sing at their BDSM/kink club instead. Hell, he’d even done a rope bondage demonstration on her at Marc’s house a couple days before the cougar attack.

  Now he’d fucked her. A god-damned virgin.

  Jesus Christ.

  One more thing to add to his life’s long list of transgressions.

  Adam reached over and turned on the light. Glancing down at the sheet, he saw the bloodstain and closed his eyes again. He’d hurt her. Yeah, he’d fucked up royally. God, had he ever.

  But what was she doing in his bed in the first place? It seemed every time he woke up lately, she was in bed with him, or sleeping in a chair nearby. How was he supposed to keep her at arm’s length when she plastered her body against him?

  Don’t go there, dickwad. You are completely responsible for what happened. She was an innocent—until you came along.

  Truth be told, if his memory wasn’t totally faulty, it sure seemed like he was the one plastered against her hot little backside.

  When he went to sit up, the muscles in his back protested loudly. He sat on the edge of the bed waiting for his head to clear, then stood up. Slowly, trying not to pull any maimed and healing muscles—if he hadn’t already done so while pumping his dick into Karla with so much enthusiasm—he stood up and walked into the adjoining bathroom to clean himself up, then returned to the bedroom. He pulled from the dresser a clean pair of sweats and a USMC t-shirt.

  Between having sex and being out of bed for the first time in more than two weeks, he felt as weak as a kitten.

  Kitten.

  He’d called her kitten. Where the hell had that pet name come from? Oh, yeah. Her friend, Cassie, had called her Kitty as they were hiking down the mountain looking for Angelina. He’d wondered all those years ago in the Chicago bus station what nickname she hadn’t wanted to reveal to him. Kitty.

  He preferred kitten. His kitten.

  Aw, fuck that shit.

  Hell, he needed to check on her. He crossed the hallway and knocked softly on her door. Was Cassie still sleeping next door? He hadn’t ventured out of his bedroom since he’d gotten home from the hospital. Karla’s best friend would find out soon enough what he’d done, but he wasn’t ready to face the accusations of being a pervert yet. He needed to regain more of his strength first.