Seeking Sorrow (Guardians of Terath Book 1)

by Zen DiPietro

  Humor brimmed in his eyes. “The lovely little beverage I shared with you happens to be a restorative. Old recipe. Family secret, and all that.” His eyes gave up merely brimming and went for an all-out twinkle.

  Kassimeigh snorted with laughter. The others paused in surprise, then abandoned themselves to the good spirits, laughing along with her. The vitality and optimism coursing through them felt remarkably freeing, like being enveloped in a warm pocket of childhood and sunshine. Basking in it was irresistible.

  Luc finished off a glass of juice and plunked it down on the table. “It gets better. I felt so well last night I decided to come back down here and see if a little digging would uncover anything.”

  Kassimeigh took a hearty bite of berries. They were tiny, but burst in her mouth like flavorful supernovas. Delicious. The best berries she’d ever had.

  Izzy leaned forward. “And did it?”

  Luc reached for the bowl of berries. “Indeed. Finally, we have something to work with.”

  The others stopped eating. Luc took no notice. He dug into his berries and appeared to enjoy them as much as Kassimeigh had.

  “This town is being used as a supply base for a fortified installation some distance away. I talked to the barkeep who pointed me toward some people who have had some experiences. Not secondhand information. Firsthand accounts.”

  “You mean . . .” Kassimeigh said, “you already talked to them?”

  The manahi stopped eating and clasped his hands over his placemat. “I did. One man described creatures matching the description of the things that attacked us. He and a couple friends had been delivering supplies to a specific location in the middle of nowhere. They’d made several such deliveries and decided to hide and wait to see who came to collect the cargo.”

  Kassimeigh waited for Luc to continue. They’d found their first strong lead, and she felt excitement at the idea of finally being on track. Yet it had happened so unexpectedly that she wondered if she should distrust this new information.

  “Are you confident about what this guy said, or would you like me to question him?” Izzy asked.

  Luc shook his head. “His description of events is too detailed, too similar to what we’ve seen ourselves. I don’t doubt him.”

  “That’s a huge break for us.” Will’s voice rang with enthusiasm. “Did you get the coordinates of the location?”

  “I did, for the cost of a few credits. And there’s more. The gossip grapevine has reported people going missing. No disappearances from Collington, but a lot of them from mining towns to the northwest.”

  The group fell silent for several long moments as the four younger people considered what Luc had related.

  Kassimeigh’s skepticism kicked in. “The man who described the creatures to you. You’d expect a reasonable person to be pretty traumatized by seeing something like that. Why wouldn’t he tell everyone he knew?”

  “He tried. But while he and his friends waited to see who came to pick up the cargo, they warmed up with some of the local rotgut. Only the one man remembers seeing anything, and his friends assume he was so drunk he hallucinated it. Convenient for us, really. We get the information we need without the publicity that could cause us trouble.”

  Will shifted in his seat. “This is the first good news we’ve had on this trip. We have something solid to work with. We could launch an operation to intercept those who collect the supplies, or tail them back to wherever they go. We could place some discreet operatives here in Collington. We could look for a defensible position to use while searching for this supposed stronghold. We have actual options.”

  “We need to consider our next steps with care,” Arc agreed. “We don’t want to expose ourselves and risk losing this thread we’ve found. We want to work that thread loose until we can unravel the entire tapestry.”

  “We’ve reached a critical point.” Will’s low voice rang with authority. “We need to fortify ourselves, gather reinforcements, and meet with Magistrate Trewe. We must confer with her on how we should proceed.”

  “Leave Apex behind? See the sun, be warm, and all that? ” Izzy sat up straight.

  They all glanced around the table, silently conferring. When all heads bobbed assent, Izzy yelled, “Woohoo,” causing the other few patrons on the other side of the tavern to glance over at them. “When do we leave?”

  To Kassimeigh, the large mid-lats monorail station looked like utopia. The long journey to get there had not been pleasant, but it served as a counterpoint that only made home feel all the better. The familiar scent of the air filled Kassimeigh’s lungs with far more comfortable breath than she’d ever had in Apex. She felt as if she’d been wearing a slightly-too-tight set of plate armor, and now wore her favorite wash-worn shoka.

  A glance at Izzy proved that the reader’s pleasure eclipsed her own. Izzy’s eyes darted around, visually feasting on the comforts of home. Constant motion drove her as she tried to experience everything at once. As soon as they’d left the platform, Izzy had stopped at the first food cart they passed and bought a flaky pastry tart on a stick. She ate it as they walked into the main terminal.

  “I want to hit the spa for a sauna and massage, get my hair cut and styled, then wear something sleek and smooth to an amazing dinner at a restaurant.” Izzy practically swooned from all the choices available to her.

  Kassimeigh chuckled at Izzy’s enthusiasm. “Are you sure we have time for all that? It’s nearly evening already.”

  “I am properly motivated to make things happen, so yes. We’d planned to overnight here, anyway, before taking the rail to your keep.”

  The keep. Kassimeigh felt a deep ache in her stomach. Home. She looked forward to the chance to center her mind, find peace, and proceed with her mission. But first they must permit her to proceed with this mission. She didn’t know if they would.

  Ina Trewe’s team expected to raise an army and to fight a large battle, if not a war. Shivs devoted themselves to justice, not battle. The elders might prevent her from going any further in this endeavor. Of course, she intended to abide by the elders’ wishes, but she hoped for their approval. She did not want to abandon this mission, or her friends.

  She pulled her senses in tightly to keep herself from reaching for Arc. Her sense of him had become ingrained and now his absence jarred her. Parting from him had been more difficult than she’d expected. Not one for particular sentimentality, she never experienced difficulty saying goodbye to people or possessions. But before they’d separated to follow different monorail paths, she’d had a moment alone with Arc. Those seconds stretched out in her mind in a series of stop-motion moments.

  “I’ll see you soon.” The weight of his scrutiny had felt more personal than a physical touch. “Then, we talk about everything.”

  She’d maintained physical distance, but felt like the space between them collapsed on itself when he stared at her. She knew she’d put off their conversation for too long.

  Feeling Izzy’s subtle glance at her, she pushed those thoughts away. She didn’t want the reader eavesdropping on things she wasn’t even sure she wanted to think.

  “Just send me a message with the time and location when you’ve made the dinner reservation.” Kassimeigh looked forward to a predictable evening of common comforts.

  Izzy beamed. Her contagious enthusiasm was hard to ignore, so Kassimeigh didn’t. She enjoyed the pleasant feelings as she walked to the room she’d rented. It was right next to Izzy’s room, but the reader had headed straight for the spa. Kassimeigh had no need for any of that. She just wanted a hot shower.

  Once clean, Kassimeigh decided to wear the dress Izzy had given her to dinner. She skimmed her hands down the skirt, enjoying the sleek, almost slippery feel of the fabric. She spent the rest of her time catching up on her messages at the comm panel.

  Two and a h
alf hours later, she met a glowing, well-coiffed Izzy for dinner at the station’s fanciest restaurant. Apparently, when Izzy had made the reservation, she’d also ordered every course on the menu. Consequently, as soon as they were shown to their elegantly-appointed table, food began arriving at their table. Kassimeigh had to admit that, as far as indulgence went, Izzy really knew how to do it up.

  Though she only occasionally drank alcohol, Kassimeigh shared a bottle of good wine with Izzy. She felt they both had earned a little bit of indulgence.

  Izzy relaxed against the back of her plush chair and took a visual tour of the restaurant. From the sophisticated lighting to the high-quality linens, everything radiated elegance. When making the reservation, she’d though she and Kassimeigh deserved a bit of a treat.

  “That was delicious,” Izzy sighed as she pushed away her plate from the main course. “And this place is so romantic.”

  “Yes,” Kassimeigh agreed. “It’s a shame Will isn’t here.”

  Izzy’s dreaminess vanished. “What does that mean?”

  “I just hope the other half or so of our party is enjoying their evening as well as we are.”

  Izzy raised an eyebrow. “And Will in particular?”

  Though Kassimeigh’s exterior looked neutral and polite, Izzy felt the amusement Kassimeigh suppressed like a tickle in the back of her mind. She crossed her arms. “I see, you’re planning a backup career path as a reader, are you?”

  “You like him.”

  Izzy examined her knuckles for a moment, then relented. “He does interest me, but only in a theoretical way. He’s too young for me to involve myself with, and he currently has eyes for another.”

  “What other?”

  Izzy simply stared back at Kassimeigh.

  “Me? That’s the last thing I need. But if it’s true, then he’ll be over it soon enough.”

  “Why do you suppose that?”

  “Men like the way I look, and sometimes enjoy the novelty of my belonging to the order. Once it wears off, reality sends them on their way again, fortunately.”

  “Why is it fortunate? A shiv can enjoy relationships.”

  “I’ve never had that kind of relationship with someone who knew I was a shiv.”

  Izzy rolled that fact around in her mind. Kassimeigh had always been close-mouthed about her romantic endeavors, or lack thereof. “Reeeallly.” She drew the word out like a piece of stretched taffy. “Then Arc changes things for you.”

  Kassimeigh straightened. “I can’t deal with Arc right now. There are some things you know you won’t be able to control once you toss them into the air, so the best choice is not to juggle them. I’m dealing with as much as I can already. Arc has to wait.”

  “I understand.” Izzy once again relaxed into her chair. “Men.” She enjoyed the cliché.

  A thought occurred to Izzy. “Wait. If they didn’t know you were a shiv, you must not have had very in-depth relationships. The nature of a person’s profession tends to come up pretty quickly.”

  Kassimeigh pursed her lips. “Deep relationships require deep commitment. I guess you’d say I’ve dated casually, and that’s enough.”

  “Is ‘enough’ all you want? Or does happiness, or even joy, figure in?”

  “They’re all worthy goals. I’ll take whichever of them comes my way.”

  “Interesting. So . . . enough about men. Let’s deal with what really matters.”

  Kassimeigh cast Izzy a wary glance, which she answered with a cheery grin. “Which dessert are you having?”

  Chapter 7

  The Northern Keep of the shiv order didn’t get its name from a location in the northern reaches of Terath. Because they all circumnavigated the middle latitudes of Terath, shivs had named the keeps for their relative locations from one another. The oldest keep had boasted the very uninteresting name of The Keep, until a second keep joined the first, hundreds of years ago. At that point, the older one became the Western Keep, and the new one the Eastern Keep. As time passed, the order added two more keeps. To follow the existing nomenclature, they became the Northern and the Southern.

  Whatever it lacked in authenticity of name, the Northern Keep made up for in size. Its stone façade loomed tall with a simple pattern of painstaking elegance. As she looked up at the sturdy structure, Kassimeigh felt the connection of belonging. Frayed edges within her smoothed out, and a wave of calming self-reliance swept aside her burdens. She closed her eyes and savored the sensation before pressing her hand to the identification panel. The door whooshed open, welcoming her home. Izzy wordlessly shadowed her into the building.

  Inside, the keep offered modern conveniences and bright lighting. An air of history and tradition clung to surfaces like physical decorations. The elegant construction and its painstaking maintenance made the only design statement. No superfluous ornamentation adorned the walls or floors. Izzy looked around curiously, but she seemed a little intimidated.

  Kassimeigh gave Izzy a reassuring pat on the shoulder. Although outsiders could visit the keep, they rarely received an invitation without a specific purpose. Izzy probably would be the only person within the keep at that time who had not dedicated to the order. Kassimeigh showed her to a guest room.

  “You’ll find a map of the keep on your comm panel. I’ve registered you as my guest, so no one will bother you. If you need anything, ask anyone. They’ll be glad to help. I’ll see you in the dining hall for dinner,” Kassimeigh promised before striding down another hall to her own quarters. Once there, she efficiently secured her gear and sank into the chair by her window to rest for a moment and center her mind.

  The small room offered everything she needed. She had a comfortable bed with a cozy green quilt and a hand-carved wooden chair. Pale cream-colored paint covered the walls. Her chair faced the best feature of the room. Sunlight streamed in the window from dawn to dusk, with a view of the keep’s garden. She leaned back in the chair and slowly expelled all her breath.

  She focused inward. Only when truly centered could she act with the wisdom and balance of a shiv.

  Once in the proper mind state, she dressed in a fresh oatmeal-colored shoka. Although they favored darker colors in public, shivs tended toward neutral or light colors within the keep. She secured her hair in a tidy twist and slid her feet into slim, worn sandals instead of the thick traveling boots she’d worn for weeks. She would not miss them.

  She strode down the hallway in search of Eryl. He had been her personal mentor since her arrival to the keep. She needed to talk to him before any other shiv.

  Kassimeigh focused on her breathing, smooth and even. Her breath connected her mind to her body and its reflexes. She rooted herself into the moment and enlivened her instincts. Gratitude and harmony filled her as she relaxed into the comfort of training with Eryl.

  With the lightness and fluidity of wind, he swung his staff around, intent on cracking her skull. The same alacrity had her ducking, pivoting, and sweeping her own staff toward his feet so she could drop him. He leapt upward just enough to clear his feet from the ground, but the timing of his landing was a millisecond off and his balance suffered. Kassimeigh used that instant to press forward.

  She shifted her hands to one end of her staff to ram her weapon into her mentor’s chest. She thought she felt it brush his tunic but his own staff appeared from nowhere and deflected her strike. Her momentum brought her forward, and they stared each other down with their staffs locked and sweat sliding down their faces.

  “Good to see your time away hasn’t softened you.” His posture shifted, and he dropped his staff to his side. He shifted seamlessly to tranquility.

  She followed suit and offered a tight, respectful bow. “Thank you. I’m glad you find me sufficient.”

  He tossed her a towel, and wiped his forehead and cheeks with another. After setting
his staff on a rack, he walked slowly around the room. She deposited her own weapon on the rack and dropped into a respectful cross-legged seat on the floor.

  Again, she focused on her breathing. This time, the practice helped to compose her mind even as her muscles quivered with fatigue and adrenaline from their intense session. It felt great.

  “Do you think this cause, this action you’ve instigated, is worthy of a shiv’s attention? Is it compatible with the goals and ideals of our purpose, and the authority with which we have been burdened?”

  “I wanted to leave the decision to you and the elders. I did not wish to presume.”

  “Shivs do not go to war. We are the law. We mediate disputes with impartiality. We do not participate in the disputes. What you’ve described has the potential of a war, even if only on a small scale.”

  “Is scale a factor in right and wrong? Is a small injustice more worthy than a larger one? We don’t know where this situation will rate on scale. We’ve only considered that we should be prepared. Two cities have been reduced to dust, Eryl. Letting a third go to the same fate is not an option.”

  Eryl stopped directly in front of her. “Is your assessment colored by your personal experience? A desire for answers or justice regarding your own past?”

  A stain of surprise and insult burned in her chest, but she maintained her tranquil countenance. “Of course not. I seek only to protect the citizens of Terath.”

  He settled into a pose similar to her own. “And what if you do find a connection to your past?”

  “All that matters is doing my job as a justice. I’ll deal with any personal matters quietly, after I’ve upheld our order.”