Tanked: TANKED

by Cheri Lewis

  “I don’t care as long as we’re together and it’s fun. I have to run by and see my mom first, she was pretty pissed off I didn’t stop by last weekend. Plus I think daddy #2 wants to make sure I’m still working.”

  “Okay, say hi to your mother for me.”

  “Will do sunshine; see you in a couple of hours.”

  ****

  My eyes pop open alert when I hear Jessie’s loud screech from my spare bedroom, “McKinsey come here now!”

  I jump out of bed, grab my glasses and run down the hall to his room, stubbing my toe in the process. “What is it? What’s wrong!?” I find him standing back pointing down toward the floor. There was a little sandwich bag in the middle of the room and it looked like it was filled with some sort of crumbled up dried grass. “What is that?”

  “It looks like marijuana.”

  Oh crap! I swallow hard and bend at the waist to get a better look at it, “Marijuana. Is it yours??”

  He gives me a look of absolute disbelief. “How many times have you known me to smoke pot? Besides I don’t want me teeth to turn brown.”

  I roll my eyes. “Jessie, I don’t think your teeth will turn brown smoking pot. Where do you think it came from then?”

  “I don’t know. I got up this morning and there it was in the middle of the floor.”

  “It wasn’t in the floor last night?”

  “I don’t think so but I don’t make it a habit to inspect the floors for marijuana when I walk into a room, plus look whose house we are talking about here. You probably have plants growing under the bed and you’d never know.”

  “Your “bedroom” is the cleanest room in the house and if it’s not whose fault is it then?” I’m not sure why Jessie has never fully moved in with me. I’ve asked him to several times but he always uses the same excuses. “I don’t want to move out and leave mom, I’m her only kid.” “You just got out from under your parents; you need to learn to take care of yourself.” I don’t ask him anymore because what does it matter. He’s here all the time and we know my spare bedroom is his bedroom.

  We both stand several feet back watching it like it was going to grow legs and run away. “We have to do something with it. It can’t stay there in the middle of my floor,” I say.

  Jessie sits back on the bed and crosses his arms as he stares at the bag in the middle of the floor. “Did Joel smoke pot?”

  My heart hits my stomach and then I begin to get pissed at the thought he might sink that low all because I won’t date him. “I don’t know. If he did, he never did in front of me but I wouldn’t have thought he would send me black roses either. Do you think he would do that? I mean do you think he would put this in my house and call the police and say we were smoking pot?”

  “I don’t know, honey. All I know is, it wasn’t here and now it is and it ain’t mine.”

  I think it over for a second. “Okay, pick it up, and let’s flush it down the toilet.”

  He animatedly waves his arms around, his eyes narrow in on me. “I’m not picking that up. Do you know what kind of sensitive scanners they have at the airport? This will have the machines screaming that I’ve been handling illegal drugs and that will not look great on my already long resume.”

  I shake my head and cross my arms. “Well, I’m not picking it up either; I don’t want to touch it.”

  We almost jump into each other’s arms when we hear the loud knock on the front door; Jessie starts panicking. “Oh my God, the police are already here.”

  “Should we kick it under the bed or something?”

  “No way. That makes us look more guilty.”

  “But we’re not guilty!” I cry.

  Jessie tip-toes to the window and peeks out. “I don’t see anything or anybody.”

  “You can’t see the driveway from here, come on.” I grab his arm and we start for the front door as another set of knocks sound, I look back at him in the eyes and say, “And whatever you do, act normal.”

  Once we get to the front door I’m kicking myself for not having a peep hole yet. I wonder if I have to buy a whole new door or if you can buy a kit or something. I open the door slowly and sigh, instantly relieved when I see Tank standing at the door. I open the door all the way and motion for him to come in and watch as he eyes me and Jessie. I quickly cross my arms over my chest when I remember I’m still in my spaghetti strap pajamas top, braless, but he doesn’t even seem to notice that. His gruff voice finally asks, “What’s going on?”

  I try to play it cool. “Nothing. Why would anything be going on?”

  Movement catches my eye and I watch as a sleepy Prima appears from my bedroom door and makes her way slowly down the hallway, walking right past us like we were lowly peasants and deserve no acknowledgement.

  Then Jessie and his big mouth brought me quickly back to reality. “Hey, tell me something, since you’re her private investigator. If we tell you something do you have to tell the police?”

  My eyes get so wide they hurt and they feel like they’re about to pop out of my head. Tank stares long and hard at Jessie before he asks, “Are you asking me if there is a privileged confidentiality agreement between her and myself?”

  “Yes, like if she commits murder and tells you about it do you have to tell the police?”

  He quickly looks at me. His hazel eyes feel like they were boring into my soul. “Did you kill somebody?”

  In complete aggravation I blurt out, “ARGH! No! I didn’t kill anybody. Somebody put drugs into my spare bedroom and we’re trying to figure out what to do with them.”

  I watch as he crosses his arms, suspicion ringing out in the tone of his voice. “Drugs? What type of drugs?”

  “Marijuana,” Jessie quickly informs him.

  His face instantly fell from serious to curious, and I have a feeling he’s thinking either I or Jessie smoke pot and we don’t want the other one to know. So I say, “I need you to take this serious. Could you have the bag tested for fingerprints to see if they are Joel’s?”

  “Show me where the drugs are,” Tank orders but does it nicely.

  I lead the way into the bedroom and it’s gone. What in the world? I look around the room and look up at Jessie. “Did you hide them?”

  “I was right behind you. When would I’ve had time to hide them?”

  “I don’t know. I didn’t know if you decided to kick them under the bed or dresser.”

  Tank asks, “Is that the drugs?” I turn in enough time to watch Prima trot by the bedroom door toting the bag of weed in her mouth. What in the hell?

  “Quick catch her,” Jessie yells!

  Prima’s ears lean back and she takes off running. We chase that stupid cat all over the living room before we finally pin her between the wall and the back of the couch where she finally drops it. She then jumps up on the back of the couch and takes off toward the back of the house. Tank bends down and picks the baggy up, running his thumb across the plastic then opens the bag, and takes a sniff. I guess you can’t get high from sniffing marijuana. He immediately rolls his eyes and I’m in shock when he turns the bag upside down and dumps its entire contents into the floor. “Are you crazy?” I gasp.

  He shakes his head and says as walks out of the living room. “Watch this.”

  Jessie and I look at each other completely confused and he shrugs his shoulders at me as he says, “Maybe he’s going to get the vacuum; Lord knows it’s about time someone shows you how to use one around here.”

  “What is it with you and cleaning? You got some O.C.D. about it?” I shove his arm then Tank appears in the doorway with Prima in his arms. He lightly drops my cat on top of the drugs and I open my mouth to protest and I watch in surprise as she starts rolling around in it and meowing loudly. It almost reminds me of an animal in heat. Little specks of green stuff litters her beautiful white fur.

  I look up at Tank. He says “Your bag of marijuana is a bag of catnip.”

  As usual Jessie beats me to it, “Catnip?!”

 
; I roll my eyes and sink down onto the couch in disbelief while Prima continues to wallow around in the mess on the floor and I feel stupider than I’ve ever felt in my life. I even knew I had catnip that came in the last bag of toys I bought her but I don’t remember it being that big.

  Jessie sits beside me, leans over and takes my hand. “That’s too funny, we thought it was marijuana”

  I cut my eyes toward him and I can’t help it. I burst out laughing too because yes, we look like idiots, but who cares? It isn’t drugs and it wasn’t Joel trying to get me arrested.

  We both look at Tank when he begins talking, “I stopped by today to tell you I’ve ruled Joel out. Yes, I know he did the texts but he claims he didn’t send the roses and there’s something else at play here.”

  Our smiling faces fall and Jessie takes my hand in his again and I hold onto it for dear life, “How do you know?” I ask. He runs his hand over his long beard and I know he’s trying to figure out how to tell me without freaking me out. So I say, “Please just tell me. You can be straight with me, I need to know.”

  He sighs then we lock eyes and he delivers the news. “You have long scratches on the windows to your bedroom; the shrubs around your windows have been disturbed, broken limbs, lots of leaves on the ground on that side—”

  I look away from him and he pauses. I try to fight the instant wave of nausea but lose; I run into the hall bathroom and throw up. Jessie comes to my side until I heave again and he sounds pitiful. “Sunshine…” he runs out of the bathroom.

  I put my elbows on the seat of the toilet and hold my head. The room is spinning. I hear the water in the sink beside me and I know Jessie is back. He hands me a wet rag then I hear the water running again and this time I look up when I hear ‘Here’ and it isn’t Jessie. It’s Tank handing me a glass of water to rinse out my mouth. I don’t have time or the inclination to be embarrassed; I take the water and swish my mouth then spit it in the toilet. I hand him the glass back, flush the toilet then sit back on the floor with my back against the wall beside the tub.

  I take the wet rag and place it on my forehead then lean my head back against the wall. “Thank you for the rag.” He doesn’t respond, he stands in the doorway leaning against the frame. “And thank you for the water.” I look up at him and he isn’t looking at me. He has turned his back against the doorframe and I know he’s trying to give me a little privacy. I wipe my face with the rag then throw it into the tub beside me. “Where’s Jessie?”

  Tank shrugs as he says, “He went racing out of the bathroom and said something about being a sympathetic puker. Whatever that means.”

  I half laugh and roll my eyes. “He’s a sympathetic everything, I cry, he cries. I laugh, he laughs. I puke, he pukes.”

  Tank looks at me and this time I don’t feel like I have any privacy. I feel like he’s taking me in from head to toe. I study his deep hazel eyes and there’s something so profound about them, they bleed sadness. I’m not sure how I overlooked that the first two times I’d met him but it’s evident now. The man is broken.

  My mind’s blank. Well not exactly blank but it’s so full of a jumbled mess I’m not sure how to even go about beginning to ask questions. Thankfully I don’t have to since Tank starts first. “I think we can solve this pretty quickly. I’ve checked into your past and from what I can tell you don’t have any enemies. You deal with a small group of people on a daily basis, so that helps a lot and your movements are repetitive within the same region as well.”

  “You looked into me?” It comes out squeaky even though I don’t mean for it too, I then think about what he says. “You just made me sound like the most boring person in the world.”

  His beard moves and I know he’s half grinning. He extends his hand out. “Come on let’s go into the living room and come up with a plan. Besides, your boring life will make catching this person that much easier.”

  I take his warm hand into mine and pull myself up. “Do you think they’ll be back? I mean we haven’t had any incidences since whoever it was messing around my window.”

  The look on his face isn’t encouraging. I follow him down the hall then round the corner to the living room. Jessie is sitting in my daddy’s old recliner. “Sorry, sunshine but I had to get out of there.”

  I wave my hand then say to the both of them, “I’ll be right back.” I quickly exit the room and go into my bathroom and brush my teeth, then use my mint flavored mouthwash to help feel fresh again. When I walk back into the room, it seems I interrupt a serious conversation between the two of them. Jessie fakes a smile and Tank waits for me to sit on the couch. I know better than to ask right then because Jessie will tell me everything once Tank leaves but something else is going on.

  “I’ve scouted your house over the last couple of days. Do you know anybody with a 1989 dark gray Toyota Starlet? It has a hatchback.”

  “I have no idea what a Toyota Starlet is. I mean I might have seen it if I saw a picture of it.”

  Tank pull his phone out of his pocket and begins running his finger over the screen. He hands me his phone and I gasp when I see the car and not because I recognize it but because the car is sitting in my driveway when he took it. Jessie leans over the arm of the recliner and looks at the picture, “Are you sure they weren’t just turning around?” I ask.

  I hand him his phone back while he says, “I was parked down the street. I waited for them to get out but they never did and when I cranked my car to pull up and talk to them, they backed out and left. I’ve run the tags. The car belonged to an Elaine Birdshaw. Do either of you recognize that name?” I don’t look at Jessie but I shake my head and I have a feeling he did as well when Tank finishes. “I didn’t figure you did. She vanished in 1992 and her body was found two years later.”

  “Oh my gosh,” Jessie whispers.

  “You don’t think the person who murdered her is after me do you? I mean I don’t know her, I don’t know anything about her—”

  Tank squats down in front of me, this time the sadness of his eyes are filled with sincerity and promise. “This ends here. We’ll find out what’s going on and who this person is. You have my word.” I stare at him a second, my eyes search his face again. I feel myself believing him. I instantly feel a little safer just by the look in his eyes. I nod and look down at my hands that are lying in my lap. I look back at him when he says, “You need to keep living life like you normally do, go to work. Go get your nails done. Keep regular sleep patterns. Same with Jessie. He needs to go and come as he normally does. I’ve got a call into Cootie and he’s going to help me as much as he can but until we get real proof, their hands are tied.”

  Jessie stifles a laugh and I roll my eyes then look at him knowing what he’s laughing about, so I explain to him quickly. “Cootie is the guy I talked to at the police station the first night.”

  Tank stands then shifts his weight back and forth from foot to foot as he says, “I’ve got a guy who’s as good as they get with camera equipment and surveillance. When I get back to the office, I’m going to give him a call and see if he can come over and set up some cameras.”

  I feel nauseous again when I think about having to pay somebody else. I begin adding up the hours and they’re adding up quickly. I’d better ask how much he’s going to cost me. “Okay, who does he work for and how much will this cost?” I’ll have to talk to Mr. Samford about adding him into my loan.

  “He works for himself and I’ll add it to my invoice so it will only be one bill. Don’t worry. He works fast. He doesn’t like being away from his family now. So it shouldn’t be too much.”

  “Yeah but I don’t even know what I’m paying you. We’ve never got around to discussing that.”

  “I normally charge 175 an hour and my expens—” His phone rings and he looks down at it in his hand. “Excuse me I have to take this.”

  I freak out and whisper to Jessie, “One hundred and seventy-five dollars! How in the hell am I supposed to pay him a hundred and seventy-five dollar
s and hour? I’ll never get him paid off; I set up a payment of twenty-five dollars a week.”

  Jessie stands from the recliner then sits beside me on the couch and wraps his arm around me, “I’ve got some money, I can always ask daddy number two and you can ask your parents. No matter what, you’re covered. You’re not alone.”

  My eyes well up and I nod. Tank walks back into the living room and pushes his phone back down in his jean pocket. “Good news. That was the camera guy. He said he was making a trip into the city tomorrow with his family so while they shop he will camera your place up. I need to get back to the office. I have some stuff that needs to be taken care of. Do you have any more questions?” I shake my head. “Alright then if you need me, call me. I’ll see you tomorrow.” My eyes follow him as he leaves the room and then I hear the front door shut.

  I look at Jessie. “Do you think I’ll have to pay him while he stands around and watches the other guy put up the cameras?”

  “Well if there’s one thing we’re good at sunshine, it’s spending money.” I laugh to keep from crying and I lay my head on my best friend’s shoulder.

  CHAPTER FOUR

  Camera Man

  I lean against the counter in the darkened kitchen; my head is pounding with a headache. Last night after the lights went out and the house was quiet, I had way too much time to think. I ended up in bed with Jessie and Prima, and cried myself to sleep.

  Jessie walks in the kitchen behind me and I ask, “What were you talking about when I walked in the living room last night?”

  “I’d told him I was going to quit the airline and stay home with you, since the guy seems to leave you alone when somebody is with you and he was telling me why that was a bad idea.”

  “Do I want to know why that’s a bad idea?”

  “We didn’t get that far.”

  “Oh.”

  He leans in and reaches an arm around my neck hugging me against him, my back to his front, “I called June and told her we weren’t coming to church this morning and that you had a terrible headache.”