Redeem Me

by Jennifer Foor

  This visit with my family was making me a little crazy, but it was also reminding me of all the things that I still had left to lose.

  Somehow, someway, I’d regain respect from my family, and prove to my girlfriend’s parents that there was more to me than just a football player.

  Chapter 4

  Cameron

  Even though Parker wasn’t too keen on the visit, I was excited to be around his sister and the rest of his family again. It was important for me to figure out why they continued to push Parker away, when I knew for so long he was like a prodigy to them. His skill on the football field was so natural. I’d overheard people talking about the way he maneuvered his body around, and how they hadn’t seen it in anyone else in many years. That alone was something to be proud of.

  I think sometimes Parker didn’t think about the fact that I was an only child, or perhaps he just assumed that I liked it being that way. Contrary to those beliefs, whatever they were, I hated it. Perhaps if I had a sibling I would have had someone to confide in. Maybe if I had a sister I could have learned how to act around someone my age. I would have known what it was like to play with a child in my own home. It would have been nice to share that kind of bond with someone. What kid wants their parents and household help to be her only friends?

  I wasn’t trying to make myself seem pathetic. God knows I’ve lived a very comfortable life. My family was prosperous and I’ve never wanted for anything. Well, not until I fell in love with Parker Hutchinson. Once I knew what that felt like everything changed. I went from thinking I had it all, to realizing that I never had what I really needed.

  I knew we were still young, and that life could throw us curveballs at any moment, but in my heart I felt like Parker was the one. I felt like there was no other man that I wanted to be with.

  Jamey and Peyton were a cute couple to me. Sure, they argued from time to time about stupid stuff, but they never went to bed angry. I’d like to think that Parker and I lived by that same code. With him being on edge, I kept quiet when we pulled into the driveway behind his sister’s car.

  When it came to his family, and the plans they made, Parker always kept me out of the loop. I went wherever he took us, and was always on my best behavior. For the most part I think they all liked me. I used manners, and did my best to help out with whatever they were doing. That included clearing a table or doing the dishes.

  Instead of getting right out of the car he sat there, pressing his head into the steering wheel. “I’m not ready to go inside yet.”

  “I wish you’d tell me why, Parker. I love you. I wouldn’t be mad, no matter what it was. I’m sure this is all going to blow over, if it hasn’t already.”

  “You don’t know shit!” He snapped. I was so shocked that I put my hands up to my face, as if I was trying to hide my reaction.

  Parker’s shoulders sagged, and he immediately reached out for me. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean -.”

  “Forget about it.” I climbed out of the car before we had another argument that would lead to no resolution.

  Once I grabbed my bags out of the backseat, I headed for Peyton’s front door, while Parker followed behind. I knocked before he could say anything, but I could tell he felt bad. It didn’t matter. The way he was acting was only confirming the fact that he had to be hiding something. I clearly didn’t know the whole truth to what was going on with him.

  Unfortunately, since I was an outsider, I refused to push him about it until we got home. If I couldn’t get the truth out of his sister during our visit, I’d just have to wait until we were back at college.

  Jamey opened the door before I could knock. He had his phone against his ear while waving us inside with his free hand. Peyton whipped around the corner with her arms spread wide. “I’m so glad y’all are here.” I’d met her a few times, but not enough to consider her my BFF. Sure, that was probably partly my fault, considering that I had no social skills to even begin to know how to handle someone as high-strung as she was.

  The last time we’d been around them, which was the last time we’d come to visit, I got along with Jamey better. He was quiet around crowds, and I could tell that he still didn’t feel comfortable around their family.

  Parker had explained that it was because of their past, but still. They were expecting a child, and living together. Didn’t there come a time and place where people put aside their differences and got along? That’s how it was in books. Certainly it’s how it should have been in real life.

  At any rate, I did my best to smile and hug her back, pretending that I knew exactly what she was going through. I spotted her friend, Wayne, walking out of the small kitchen. Following behind him was his daughter, Abigail. Her hair was in pigtails. Now Wayne was fun to converse with. Our love of books always gave us something to talk about. It was funny how I wasn’t attracted to him at all, when I probably should have favored him over Parker, for our common interests at least.

  Wayne seemed like a wonderful guy. He’d lost his wife, from what Peyton told me, and I admired how much he adored his daughter. It is a tragedy to lose a part of your family, but I sure was glad that little girl had a dad who thought she was a little princess. Had that been me, my father would have let the help raise me. It disgusted me to even think about it.

  While trying to avoid the fact that Parker and I were having some kind of silent tiff with each other, I spent the next hour helping Peyton get organized. I honestly don’t know why she was even worried to begin with. The party was supposed to be at her brother’s house, but was changed to another location at the last minute, and according to Jamey, Peyton wasn’t even supposed to know about it. Apparently she saw her invitation at the diner when she’d gone to visit Jamey one day. He made her promise not to spoil the fun, but it didn’t stop her from making sure that they brought food. She’d been told it was a cookout, so naturally they would have been expected to bring some kind of dish or dessert. Peyton was going all crazy with it.

  She insisted that Jamey make all these crazy things that she’d seen on the internet. When he refused to get involved, knowing the repercussions of spilling the beans, she insisted on doing it all herself.

  By the end of the night she was so exhausted that she fell asleep at the kitchen table. After he took several comical pictures of it, Jamey picked her up and carried her to their bedroom. He came out only to make sure that Parker and I had everything we needed before he retreated to bed himself.

  I went into the guest room first, changed into my pajamas, and then brushed my teeth. When I climbed into bed Parker walked into the room. He said nothing as he pulled off his shirt and climbed in beside me.

  Since we always had to sneak to spend the night together, on account of dorm curfews, I appreciated the time we were away and could be together. “It’s always so fun being around you and Peyton. Sometimes I forget that you’re twins.”

  He held me close against his chest. “That must be nice.”

  “Parker, don’t say that. She loves you.”

  “I don’t mean it in a bad way. I’d do anything for my sister, it’s just that all of our lives we’ve had to share things.”

  “Like attention?” It was very obvious that he longed for acceptance. Perhaps it had come from years of never being able to be the only child. Though, that still wouldn’t have been the case since he had an older brother as well.

  “Not that. Never mind. It’s not even important. Why don’t you take off those panties, so we can stop talkin’, and start gettin’ busy?”

  I giggled and reached my lips up to him. “How do you know I want you like that? I might be too tired to commit to ten minutes of sex.”

  He laughed at my choice of words. “Woman, you want some. You’re always the one askin’ for it. Now’s your chance. Stand up and show me what’s under that t-shirt.”

  Feeling a bit of arousal in the way he presented it, I did as I was told, standing up over top of him and lifting my shirt over my head. My free breasts stood at a
ttention as I shimmied down my panties, tossing them in Parker’s face. He put them over his head like a hat before placing both of his arms behind his head. His interest in my naked body only fueled me to have the courage to start swaying my body around. I drug my finger over my lips, letting my tongue coarse over it, and then rubbed the wet saliva over one of my nipples. “How’s this? Does it make you want to fuck me?”

  His face seemed focused, but he refused to smile. “Turn around and show me what else you’re hiding from me, Cam.”

  I did as he ordered, turning around and giving my ass a little shake. I heard a low grumble coming from him, and knew without even turning back to look, that he was turned on. I used my toe to rub over his growing erection in his shorts.

  “Bend over, baby. I want to see that pussy up in my face.”

  The more he talked the more I wanted him. It was crazy how he could change the subject, and leave me begging for his attention.

  I bent over slowly, rubbing the skin on both of my ass cheeks. While staring at his legs, I felt his warm hands running up the back of my legs. His lips kissed the skin on the inside of my thigh, before his fingers drug over my pussy. I closed my eyes, still bent over waiting for him to do it again. He slapped it lightly. “Let’s get you excited. You like that, don’t you?”

  I placed my hands over his legs to keep my balance. “Yes. Use your fingers. Feel how bad I want you.”

  Parker wasted no time driving two fingers in between the lips of my pussy. I heard him moan when he discovered my eagerness. Swiftly, he spun me around, pulling me down on top of him. “You’re going to ride the fuck out of me, aren’t you?” He rubbed my clit with force, making my body already want to contract. I hungrily lunged my lips down, stealing a kiss while my hips found that magic spot.

  I could sense the burning desire taking over my senses, leading me to do and say things that I’d been taught were dirty. Being with Parker wasn’t like the way the characters in all of my books had made love. Our sex was adulterated, mixed with a privation for satisfaction. I didn’t just yearn for his affection, or want to become one with him. I wanted to feel so satiated that it was almost like I’d left my body for a few moments in time. I needed to feel like the world had stopped spinning while I succumbed to this man.

  He continued rubbing my clit, while I took a firm hold of his rock hard erection and let it glide inside of my channel. My pussy reacted immediately, contracting against his girth. The ecstasy we shared could be felt in every kiss, in each movement of our hands, and in the way we connected, both physically and mentally. We may have been young, but Parker gave me that kind of thrilling overture, again and again. Every time we came together like this, it was as if nothing else in the world existed. I wasn’t fighting with myself regarding my ambitions. I wasn’t worried about my father’s aspiring dreams for me. These moments were for the two of us alone. My life may have been set in stone, but every so often, at times like these, they didn’t seem to matter.

  We came together, losing ourselves in a moment of elapsed bliss.

  Then there was a knock on the bedroom door. “Can you two fuckers keep it down in there? Stop rubbin’ it in.”

  We both laughed at Jamey’s request. Peyton had told us that she was having trouble, and the doctor asked them to take a break from intercourse. I would have thought she’d be uncomfortable doing it anyway, but I guess I’d been wrong.

  “Sucks to be you, dude.” Parker laughed and pulled me in for a kiss after making his snarky comment to the unfortunate guy standing outside of the room. While in his arms I knew I’d soon fall fast asleep, content with my life and the future that we were going to have together.

  Chapter 5

  Parker

  I laid in bed watching her sleeping next to me. She was so innocent from it all, and in every way I wanted life to stay that way for her. With the looming knowledge that I’d have to spend the whole weekend around my dad, it was difficult to close my eyes and rest. Even with the time that had already passed, we were struggling with our relationship. It pained me to not be able to tell Cameron, but I was also okay with her never knowing. I knew our future together depended on it, and when we were at school it was easy to accomplish. When I was at home it was a different story.

  The next morning I woke up to an empty bed. I could hear Cameron and my sister gabbing in the living room as I climbed out of the warm covers and made my way to the bathroom. They both smiled when I passed by, but waited for me to finish up before greeting me.

  “Good morning, lazy.”

  I scratched my head and walked in the room toward them. “Sorry. I didn’t sleep much last night.”

  “You’d think that after all that bangin’ you’d be knocked out pretty quick. Cameron must have been doin’ all the hard work.” My sister and Cam began to giggle, while I made a beeline for the kitchen. Just as I began pouring the hot liquid into a cup I saw someone pulling in the driveway out the window. Instantly I recognized the business lettering on the door panel of the truck. The honk of the horn caused me to jump, spilling coffee all over the countertop. “Shit.”

  “Parker, dad’s here to pick you up. He called earlier and said he needs your help with somethin’.”

  I started wiping up the mess. “With what?”

  “Well, since I’m not supposed to even know about the party I have no clue. Just go help him. Cameron can ride with us to the shower later on. I’m sure he’ll keep you and Shayne busy.”

  The only thing I heard was that I was going to be spending the whole morning with my brother and my dad, the two people that I resented the most for my poor choices. They were seriously the last human beings on the planet that I wanted to hang around with. “I didn’t agree to that shit at all, Pey. Where the hell is mom at?”

  “She’s working on the cake. Shut up and get dressed. The longer you make him wait the more pissed he’ll get.” Realizing that my sister was right, I hurried into the guest room and pulled on a pair of jeans, followed with a t-shirt. My father was standing at the front door when I came out from brushing my teeth. “Well look at what the cat drug in. It’s good to see you, Dad.” I didn’t know how good it was, but it sure as hell was the right thing to say to him.

  “Good to see you as well, kid. Are you about ready to get going? Your mother has a whole list for us to do today.” He put his hand on my shoulder and smiled, but it was nothing like the bear hugs he used to give me.

  Just as suspected my father cut out his kind act as soon as we climbed into his truck. I hadn’t even buckled my seatbelt before he started on me. “We need to go pick up your brother. I’m telling you right now that I don’t want any drama between you two this weekend. This is about your sister. Your mom is already pissed off that she knows about it. Something else just might set her over the edge, and I’m not in the mood to deal with it.”

  “I have no beef with Shayne, dad. We’re cool.”

  “You say that now, but I’ve seen you around the twins, Parker. You can fool everyone else, but I know that you lose your shit when you’re around them.”

  “Do we have to talk about this now? I’m tellin’ you that it ain’t goin’ to be a problem. Cam is with me, and she don’t need to know what went down with all of that. It’s been settled. Shayne’s got his family, and that’s the end of it.”

  “One day you’re going to regret your decision. What then, Parker?”

  It was the same argument as every single time I was around this man. It was as if he wanted me to admit that giving up the twins was a mistake. Still to this day, I didn’t regret it. Those kids were being raised by my brother, as his own. He loved them as their father, and that gave me all of the peace that I’d ever look for. It was plainly obvious that I wasn’t prepared to be a father. I get that accidents happen and people get through it, but Ashley and I weren’t even friends. The only reason she kept that pregnancy at first was because she was trying to pawn them off as someone else’s. Had it not been for my brother stepping in there’s
no telling what she would have done, or even if she would have kept them at all.

  I hate to even speculate on it. Ashley had changed so much, and she and my brother had been through Hell and back. They deserved to be the happy family that they were. As much as they all like to think that I was against them, I think I was cheering for them to last more than anyone else. Someday Cameron and I would graduate college, get married, and then have a couple kids. Regardless who planted the seed in Ashley; the twins belonged to my brother. I’d vowed to myself, and to him, that I would never argue that fact, unless something happened to both of them. Shayne’s twins would still always be my niece and nephew. I’d love them forever, but not as my own children.

  I think that’s what was so difficult for my parents to understand. They didn’t look at it in my perspective. All they saw was me pushing off my problem on someone else, and letting my brother pick up the pieces. In retrospect I could understand why they felt the way they did, but also knew that my choice was only going to benefit everyone. Mostly, I wanted us all to be a happy family again.

  I turned to my father, as sure as I’d ever been about the subject. “They ain’t my kids. It’s as simple as that. They’ve got a dad and mom that love them like crazy. Why would I ever want to cause problems?”

  “Son, I wish I could tell you the answer to that, but I just can’t anymore. Your mother and I still can’t wrap our heads around it.”

  “Well it seems like you’re the ones with the problem then. I’m happy, and I’m doin’ my best to move forward. Don’t you want to get back to the way we were before?”

  He was quiet for a second, rolled down the window, and lit up a smoke. “I just expected so much more out of you, maybe out of Shayne, but never you, Parker.”

  “So you’re smokin’ again because of me? I’m real glad I could assist you in ruining your health. Is there anything else you want to blame me for?” I hated being sarcastic with my dad, but enough was enough. Anyone would have been frustrated. It had been two years.