“What’s up?” he asked without taking his eyes from the TV. No words would come. When the silence continued, Sawyer glanced over in my direction. “Hey . . .”
One look at my face and he jumped from his seat and pulled me into his arms. “Keys, what’s wrong?”
“Did you know?”
He leaned back and watched me. “Did I know what?”
“That wasn’t the whole video.”
He guided me over to the chair and pulled me down onto his lap. “What do you mean that isn’t the full video?”
I brushed the tears from my face. “Kristen sent me the whole video. It doesn’t end with Cole saying don’t be scared.”
He shook his head. “But I thought that was the last thing you remembered?”
“It was, but that was because Cole dragged Sam down to an empty room and beat the shit out of him.”
Sawyer straightened in his seat. “He did what?”
“He defended me and I paid him back by believing all of the bullshit in those interviews. I let the past influence me and I was wrong.”
Sawyer drew me close, rubbing light circles on my back. “You didn’t know.”
“Doesn’t make a difference,” I mumbled into his shirt. “I pushed away the man I love because I didn’t have enough faith in him.”
“You can’t think like that. You didn’t know about the rest of the video. It’s not your fault.”
I lifted my head to look him in the eye. “Actually, this time I think it is.”
I buried my head against his chest and sobs racked my body. I’d have to find a way to make it up to him. To apologize for all the hurt I caused him. This one was on me.
There was a light knock on the door. “Come in,” Sawyer called.
CHAPTER 32
Cole
“Are you sure this is a good idea?” I looked across at Heath as we drove over to Mari’s place. “How do you know Sawyer got her to watch it or read the article?”
“I don’t. But if anyone can it’s Sawyer. They’ve gotten even closer since all of this happened.”
A boulder settled in my gut. I’d seen the shared gazes and light touches the two of them shared from time to time. It would appear that despite our time apart, the green-eyed monster was still rearing its ugly head. I reminded myself that they were just good friends.
It had been a few weeks since everything blew up in my face, and during that time, the band had been on the road. I hadn’t given up, though. I spent most of my free time trying to come up with ways to get that video to Mari, or at least to one of the guys. It had taken time, but eventually I got Heath to listen. I’d had to send the video to the band account from one called “ilovemari” hoping he’d open it thinking it was fan mail, but it had worked and he called me a couple of nights ago to tell me he wanted to help.
Apparently, Mari was as miserable as I was. With the publicity and hype surrounding the band, Heath had helped me get the real story about Sam to the PR department who gave it to the tabloids and that shit spread like wildfire. No longer had Mari been dating the former NFL prospect who only wanted her to boost his career. No, the media had done a complete one-eighty and now she’d been dating Cole Wallace, the man who’d tried to save her from the bullies. While it wasn’t exactly the whole truth, only Mari and I knew that, and it was enough for people to quit looking at her like she was a pathetic victim.
I knew from the guys that she’d been actively avoiding the gossip news. Not that I could blame her one little bit. The strong, beautiful woman I loved had been once again broken by the mistakes I’d made.
But I loved her.
And if getting her back meant groveling or begging on my hands and knees, I’d do it. Mari was my world. I had to give it one more try.
We pulled up in front of the house and my whole body trembled as I stepped from the car.
“Relax,” Heath said from the driver’s seat. “Everything’s gonna be fine. I’ll wait here in case you need me.”
I stopped and turned. “Thanks for everything.”
“You’re welcome and if things go your way, send Sawyer out to me.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Why would I send Sawyer out here?”
He shook his head. “Damn, you really are in a sad state. It’s been weeks since you’ve been together. I’m sure you’ll need some time alone.” He waggled his eyebrows like one of those damn cartoon characters.
Rolling my eyes, I started for the house again, each step more of a struggle than the last. I had no idea what I’d find on the other side of that door. There was the very real possibility she would slam it in my face.
I lifted my hand to knock, but then dropped it.
“Just do it,” Heath called from the car.
I sucked in a breath and knocked.
“Come in.”
Sawyer.
I swung the door open and stepped inside, and what I saw almost sent me to my knees. Mari was curled up in Sawyer’s lap, her face buried in his chest as he placed a kiss to the top of her head. His hand stroked the soft skin of her back, up and down as he soothed her, exactly as I’d been longing to do.
“Mari, I think there’s someone here to see you.” Sawyer tilted her chin up and using his thumbs, he brushed the tears from her face. They shared a look before she turned, making no attempt to remove herself from his lap.
“Cole?” Her eyes went wide, her hand coming up to her chest.
Bile burned my throat, self-loathing pouring through me like acid. I shoved my hands in my pockets, hoping it would keep me from hitting a wall. I could do that later at the gym because I was really going to need to beat the shit out of something.
“There’s something I want to say to you.” I glanced down at Sawyer’s hands wrapped firmly around her waist and closed my eyes. Acting like a jealous asshole wasn’t going to get me anywhere, and I needed her to at least listen to me before she tossed me outside. “I just wanted you to know I love you, Mariella. But, I know I don’t deserve you and hope that someone”—I glanced back and forth between Sawyer and Mari—“will make you happy one day.”
She opened her mouth to say something but I just didn’t have it in me to hear her say that I was right and Sawyer could make her happy. I spun and walked back out the door. Halfway across the yard I heard the front door slam.
“Cole, wait.”
I spotted Heath leaning against the car, watching everything play out. His eyes bounced all over the yard, probably trying to figure out who to watch first.
I rolled my shoulders and turned to face her. The moonlight cast a glow over her features, making her seem untouchable. Nights of her in my arms flooded my mind, giving an edge to my tone. “What, Mari? What else is there to say?”
She walked up to me. My first instinct was to take a step back; to save myself the pain. It was very likely that this was karma coming to bite me in the ass. This was the world’s way of making me suffer for my mistakes. For a brief period in my life, I’d thought losing my chance in the NFL was the end of the world.
How wrong was I?
I’d had no idea that losing the woman in front of me would hurt a hundred times more. There would never be another Mari.
She stood in front of me, waiting for something. For what, though?
“Look, I think everything is pretty clear.” I gestured over my shoulder with my thumb. “I’m gonna have Heath give me a ride home.”
Before I could take one step, her hand clamped around my wrist, dragging me back. Her eyes flashed and she stood on her toes and covered my lips with hers. At first, I held my ground, my lips unmoving as hers covered every inch of mine. But all too soon her taste, the feel of her body pressed against mine, became too much.
One last taste.
Like the night outside the tattoo shop, I sank my hand into her hair, holding her lips to mine. She gasped and I took advantage, slipping my tongue into her mouth. Her arms slid up my chest, wrapping around my neck. When I couldn’t take it anymore, I stepped b
ack, breaking the seal of our lips.
“I can’t do this,” I panted between breaths.
“You can.” She moved closer and I moved back. “You have to.”
I shook my head, trying to push her sweet, melodic voice out of my head. “I can’t and, no, I don’t have to.”
“I love you.” Her words were simple, honest, and they punched a hole in my chest.
“But not as much as you love Sawyer.”
“No. My love for you is different and so much more.” She came forward and took hold of my hand while I tried to catch my breath. “Please come inside, there’s something you need to know, but it’s not my story to tell.”
In a daze, I followed her back into the house.
She loves me.
More than Sawyer.
Love.
She. Loves. Me.
No matter how many times the words passed through my mind, they still weren’t settling in. Mari linked her fingers with mine and led me back into the house, guiding me to a chair in the living room. I took a seat and she sat down on my lap. The tables had turned in the last few minutes. Now it was me sitting with my arms wrapped around Mari. I glanced up at Sawyer, expecting him to be angry. But I didn’t see any of the hatred or resentment I expected. His face was wreathed in a smile.
“Sawyer, please tell him. I can’t lose him because he thinks you and I want to be together.”
I looked down at Mari, then back over at Sawyer. What could he possibly say that would make me see their relationship differently?
He bent at the waist, resting his forearms on his thighs. “Besides my parents, only two other people in the world know this. One is sitting in your lap, and the other is outside waiting in his car. I know you have no reason to keep my secret, but I’ll beg if I have to. I have no idea how it would affect Jaded Ivory and the contract. Not that I think it’s anyone’s business but my own, but I’ve worked too damn hard to have this taken away.”
He stopped, dropping his eyes to the carpet and I waited for a moment before asking, “What’s your business?”
Sawyer looked up at me again. When he glanced over at Mari, she nodded at him. “I’m gay, Cole, and I’ve known it for a long time. You’re right when you say I love Mari. I do, but not in the way you’re thinking. She’s like a sister to me, and that’s all she’ll ever be.”
Sawyer’s gay?
How did I not see that one coming?
I shrugged. “Okay.”
“Okay? That’s it?” he asked, watching me warily.
“Yeah, okay. Look, as long as you’re not fucking Mari, I personally don’t give a shit where you stick your dick.”
“Jesus, Cole,” Mari said, swatting my shoulder.
“Why are you hitting me?”
“You could be a little less crude about it.”
I gestured to Sawyer. “He’s a guy. He knows what I mean.”
Sawyer sat back in the seat, looking more relaxed than I’d ever seen him. “I do.”
Mari shook her head. “You guys are ridiculous.”
Feeling like I could conquer the world, I held her closer and kissed her forehead. “You love me?”
Eyes as clear as a Caribbean ocean gazed into mine. “Yes— I— Do.” She emphasized each word with a kiss.
Unable to take any more, I cupped her face in my hands, slipping my tongue between her lips. What started out as sweet turned molten in a matter of seconds. Mari squirmed on my lap and my dick perked up. Just having her near, touching, even between clothes, and I was hard enough to hammer nails.
God, what this woman did to me.
My hand slid down her ribs to the hem of her shirt, needing to feel all that creamy, soft skin. A throat cleared.
Shit.
I held my hands up away from her. With her in my arms everything fell away. Including the fact that Sawyer was sitting across the room, watching as I groped my girl.
Mari glanced over her shoulder and flipped him off.
He stood, chuckling. “Hey, I gave you guys a minute to stop on your own, but since that apparently isn’t going to happen, I’m gonna go see if Heath is still out there.” His eyes ran all over the two of us, practically ready to fuck right there in the chair. “Yeah, I think I’m gonna stay there tonight. I do not need to hear what’s gonna happen here.”
With that, Sawyer grabbed his wallet and keys off the side table and walked out the door. Mari’s attention turned back to me the moment it closed behind him. Fire burned deep in her eyes.
“Here, or my room?”
“While I would love to bend this sexy ass over the chair right now, I want to sleep with you curled up beside me.” I stood with her in my arms and started for her room.
It amazed me how much I missed the feel of her against me. I stepped through the door of her room, not bothering to close it since I knew we had the house to ourselves.
I didn’t bother stopping until I placed her on the bed, following her down. I took her lips in a heated kiss. Her lips were soft against mine. Every inch of me burned with need. My dick strained against my zipper.
“You have too many clothes on,” Mari said, tugging the hem of my shirt up over my head.
Sitting up, I took it and threw it to the floor, before returning to divest her of the clothes covering all that creamy skin. I adjusted myself inside my pants at the sight of her pebbled nipples standing straight, reaching for me. Lowering my head, I ran my tongue over one then the other. The soft moans of pleasure coming from Mari were an aphrodisiac like no other.
“God, Mari. What you do to me?” I titled my face to the ceiling, trying to gain control of myself.
I ran my hands over every inch of her body. Caressing her breasts, moving down her ribs until my fingers found her clit. Toying with the sensitive bundle of nerves, I slipped a finger inside her body, gliding in and out in a rhythm that my cock wanted.
“Shit, Cole. Stop teasing me. It’s been too long.”
Damn, she had me. My dick was throbbing in my shorts. I was only torturing us both by prolonging things. I stood from the bed and dropped my shorts to the floor. After rolling a condom down my length, I crawled back over Mari and wasted no time slipping inside.
“Cole,” she moaned, arching her hips closer to mine.
“I missed you,” I said, capturing her mouth with mine. Our tongues danced an exotic cadence that matched my thrusts into her.
Pleasure raced down my spine and I wasn’t sure how much longer I could hold on, as I felt her walls tighten on me. I slipped my hand between our bodies and thumbed her clit. The simple movement pushed her over the edge. Crying out, her body spasmed over mine, bringing about my own climax.
“I love you,” I cried out, holding still inside her. Darkness pulled on the edges of my vision.
When my body was empty, I gazed down at the woman below me. Her eyes were glassy and a single tear tracked down her face.
I rolled to my side bringing her with me. “Why the tears?”
Her smile was radiant. “I’m just so glad you’re here. I love you, Cole.”
“I love you, too.”
Later that night, my stomach was in knots over the one thing I’d yet to tell Mari. I’d been so excited about seeing her again, touching her, tasting her, that I’d forgotten to tell her something that was going to affect our relationship.
“I have something to tell you,” she whispered into the quiet room.
My hand froze mid-stroke up her back. With a deep breath, I forced my fingers to move again. “What’s that?”
She sucked in a breath. “The label wants us to move closer to the studio.”
I held her tighter to me. “Really?”
She leaned up on her elbows watching me. “You’re not upset?”
I brushed the hair from her face. “Not at all. Especially since I took the job at Hayward.”
She jerked her head back. “You did? Why didn’t you tell me?”
I glanced down at our obvious nakedness and back up at her.
“It wasn’t like I had much of a chance.”
“Okay, okay. We were busy.” She fell silent for a moment. “You really took the job at Hayward?”
I cupped her face in my hands. “I did. Now say you’ll move in with me.”
“What?”
“Move in with me. The university has already found me a house and I want you to live there with me.”
Moisture pooled in her eyes. “Yes. I’d love to move in with you.”
“Then why the tears?”
“Because until tonight, I thought all of this was lost to us. I love you. Thank you for not giving up fighting for me.”
“I love you, too.”
I brought her lips down to mine and just like that, everything was right in the world. The woman who’d rocked me to my core was in my arms.
I couldn’t have asked for anything more.
EPILOGUE
Cole
I blew the whistle. “Run it again.”
It was the second week of practice. Mari and I moved our stuff in a month ago and I’d quickly settled into a routine. With both of our crazy schedules, it was nice to come home to one another. But with the start of football season coming up, and Mari having to go on tour, we knew there would be a lot of traveling for both of us.
The plus of the new job: once the season was over, I could join Mari on the road, if she happened to be touring at the time.
Everything was perfect.
The studio had sued Sam for libel, not that he had any money to pay. Apparently, after a three-year stint in jail for orchestrating a hazing incident that resulted in a freshman getting injured, Sam had had trouble finding work. He worked a landscaping job, but he lost that after the truth of the video came out. Like he’d said in the article, maybe someday he’d learn from his mistakes.
The quarterback passed the ball. It was the perfect pass for the route we’d been running so I was shocked when it bounced off my wide receiver’s helmet and landed on the ground. Heads started to swivel toward me. I dropped my clipboard and stormed onto the field.
Rock Me (Jaded Ivory Book 1) Page 26