Lost in You

by Jules Bennett

  “Now that all of that is settled, spill the scoop on what’s happening with Liam.” Sophie curled her feet beside her on the sofa and swirled her wine around in her glass. “And don’t say nothing.”

  Macy cringed. What was there to say? They drove each other crazy, they fought, they kissed, and the cycle repeated. One of these days they were going to snap and most likely end up naked . . . hopefully together. Because if that didn’t happen soon, she was going to need to invest in her own punching bag.

  “She’s quiet,” Cora whispered. “What’s her face look like? That will tell you everything.”

  “I can’t tell if she’s smiling or sneering,” Sophie replied.

  Macy couldn’t help but laugh as she finished off her wine. “I don’t even know what face I was making. I have too many emotions when it comes to Liam.”

  “Really?” Cora asked, her brows raised. “Why don’t you share them and we can help you sort them all out.”

  Part of Macy wanted to spill everything, but the other part of her wanted to keep whatever was going on with Liam to herself. She’d never been one to gossip about her dates, but Liam was different. They weren’t dating, or even having sex. They were simply driving each other crazy.

  “There’s not much to tell,” Macy explained. She glanced to her empty wineglass and figured she’d better stop now. Even though she was at her own house, she might get too chatty if she had much more. “He’s quiet and easily irritated. I’m more outgoing and happy. We couldn’t be more opposite.”

  “Yet you spent the night in his apartment,” Sophie added with a smirk.

  Macy groaned, setting her glass on the old trunk she used as a coffee table. “That statement sounds extremely interesting, but the migraine I was nursing killed the evening.”

  “I heard you were there because you weren’t feeling well.” Cora stretched her legs out onto the ottoman and crossed her ankles. Heidi slept obediently beside her chair. “I was hoping that wasn’t true. But still, Liam took care of you, right?”

  Macy nodded, then remembered. “He did. He carried me upstairs when I—”

  “Wait.” Cora held up a hand. “He carried you? Like an over the shoulder fireman’s carry or I’m the man in charge and taking you to my bedroom carry?”

  Blowing out a sigh, and realizing she shouldn’t have even gone into details, Macy sank back against the couch cushions. Might as well get comfortable because she had a feeling this was going to be a long conversation.

  “I was nauseous and he carefully took me upstairs.” No way was she about to admit she’d found herself in his bed. “He wouldn’t let me drive, so after I took my medicine I ended up falling asleep. When I woke up, he was already gone for work.”

  Sophie’s eyes narrowed as she pursed her lips. “This may explain why he’s so irritable, then. He wants you, you want him, and nothing has been done. Or has it?”

  “No,” Macy exclaimed, throwing her arms in the air. “We kissed once. That’s all.”

  “A kiss?” Cora perked up. “When did this happen?”

  “Wait.” Sophie held up a hand. “Why don’t you start from the day he moved in above Knobs and Knockers and give us a detailed timeline. I’m going to need more buffalo chicken dip and wine first. Can I get you guys anything?”

  Macy groaned. “Maybe I should have another glass after all.”

  Why not? At this point she wasn’t going to get out of this girls’ night without spilling her Liam secrets and she might as well finish off the bottle Cora had brought. Who knows, maybe the girls could offer some insight as to what move to make next, because she was at a loss when it came to Liam. He had her so confused and the only consolation she had was that he was just as messed up as she was when it came to what was going on.

  “When you’re done grilling me I’d like to talk to you about a surprise party I want to throw for my dad,” Macy said when Sophie came back with a plate and full glass. “I need some quickie invitations printed and help spreading the word.”

  Sophie eased back into her spot on the sofa and smiled. “Happy to help. Now, start at the beginning of life with Liam and leave nothing out. Be sure to use plenty of adjectives during the kissing part of the story.”

  * * *

  Five o’clock. Macy nearly wept as she checked the clock. Just as she rounded the counter to lock up, the bell over the door chimed and Tanner Roark stepped inside.

  “Hey, Macy.”

  Tanner’s smile spread across his face. The man was drop dead gorgeous in that southern boy charmer type of way. They’d gone out once, kissed twice, and that had been the beginning and end of their story. While Tanner was a great guy, she just didn’t feel anything toward him. Although she’d seen him in his uniform, since he was a new member of the police force, she still didn’t get any fluttering when she was with him.

  “What brings you by, Tanner?” she asked, returning his smile.

  “Hadn’t heard from you and was curious if you wanted to grab dinner this evening. I’m off and I know it’s short notice, but I thought I’d see if you were busy.”

  Why couldn’t she like him in that way? Tanner had everything going for him—a great job, looks, his own home. Still, there was no spark. They were good friends, nothing more. He and his cousins were as close as brothers, all bachelors. Seriously, why couldn’t she be drawn to one of them?

  “I actually already have plans tonight,” she told him. Not a complete lie.

  With a tip of his head, he narrowed his eyes. “Everything okay?”

  “Fine. Just busy.”

  “Why don’t you let me know when you’re free? I still owe you a payback for that last poker hand when you cheated me out of fifty bucks.”

  Macy couldn’t help but laugh. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

  Tanner flashed that high wattage smile. “I’ll text you and give you more of a heads-up next time,” he joked as he turned toward the door. “And be sure to bring your wallet.”

  Once he was gone, Macy locked the door and clicked the OPEN sign off. She smoothed the stray wisps back from her face. Her ponytail was sliding, but she didn’t care at this point. She was ready to get her closing chores done and go home.

  Today had been one for the record books. With spring in full swing, people were shopping for yard items to get their lawns and flower beds ready. She’d nearly sold out of topsoil, and would have to remember to get an order in tonight so it would be here by Monday. She’d also sold a record number of hedge trimmers. Fine by her, but she was exhausted.

  And a load of bright colored pots in various sizes was due in tomorrow. That was a display she’d have to come in early and make room for. She’d also have to save one of the largest ones to use just outside her shop door to entice people with how beautiful the new items were. She’d definitely have to put her seed packets by the pots somewhere just inside the front door.

  How had her dad done it by himself at times? There were always slow seasons and slammed seasons, but everything balanced in the end. Right now, though, Macy was ready to keel over. Her feet were killing her and she just wanted to take her bra off and relax.

  There was no way she could coach and run the store. It wasn’t realistically possible, even if she wanted to step back onto the field again, which she wasn’t sure she had the mental capacity to handle.

  Macy pulled out all the credit receipts for the people who kept running accounts with the store. In a small town, where everybody knew everybody, in-house accounts were common.

  As she divided the slips out, she thought about the softball game she’d gone to. She’d only stayed for twenty minutes. That had been long enough for her to realize the sport had never left her. She loved every bit of it. The smells, the calls from the dugout, the teammates cheering each other on, the coaches giving silent hand gestures as to the next play. Everything came rushing back to her and Macy had felt a tug on her heart. This was what she’d been missing, but she honestly didn’t know if moving into thi
s position was a possibility. Not only that, but shouldn’t she move on? Shouldn’t she put all of that dark night behind her?

  Even the demons from her past blanketed the happiest time of her life.

  Pushing beyond the obvious reason to say no, she had another glaring reason . . . an even better one and definitely more positive. She hoped to be fostering soon. Not that she wanted any child to have to enter the system, but Macy was eager to fill her home, her heart with a child who needed nurturing.

  “Just grabbing some packaging tape.”

  Macy jerked around, holding a hand to her chest. “Liam. You scared me.”

  He stood at the base of the steps, not moving any closer. “Just put it on my tab and I’ll settle up when I give Zach my check. I didn’t mean to bother you.”

  Without waiting on her reply, he moved to the aisle where the tape was located. Macy kept her eyes on him, wondering what he needed with tape, but it was none of her business. They weren’t anything more than landlord/tenant at this point . . . except in her dreams, where he kept showing up and monopolizing every moment of her restless nights.

  Wait. Was he boxing things up? Was he moving again? That would be her business if it were the case. He hadn’t actually unpacked, if all those stacked boxes she’d seen were any indicator.

  “Are you moving?” she asked.

  His shoulders stiffened as he threw her a glance. “Are you asking me to?”

  Swallowing, Macy stepped closer. She was just going to the counter to start closing out the register. That’s all. She certainly wasn’t closing this gap between them so she could look into his eyes while they spoke or so she could inhale that woodsy, masculine scent she associated with him.

  “No, I’m not.”

  “I’m not having Sophie find another place for me.”

  Stunned, Macy jerked. “Why?”

  “I’m working on something else.”

  Wow. A man of many words. What did that mean? He was working on finding a place all on his own? He was working on moving to California? Alaska? Or he was working on driving her out of her ever-loving mind?

  Liam stared for another moment before turning his attention back to the selection. He grabbed a roll of tape off the hook and started back toward the steps. Macy’s gut clenched in disappointment. What had she expected? He’d made it clear they were to have nothing more than a business relationship, but that wasn’t working for her and she was tired of living like this, uncomfortable in her own element.

  “Are you going to ignore me the entire time you live here?” she called to his retreating back.

  Liam glanced toward the ceiling before spinning around. “Are you going to make this difficult the entire time I live here?”

  Oh, he had a smart mouth. Macy crossed the old checkered linoleum, keeping her eyes on his the entire time. That dark, intense stare could have anyone stopping in their tracks, but she refused to back down. This was her territory, damn it. He had come back and infiltrated her life. Not the other way around.

  “I’m not the one being difficult,” she countered. “You’re the one giving mixed signals. Being standoffish, kissing me, pushing me away.”

  The muscle in his jaw clenched as his eyes narrowed on her. “I’m doing this for you. Trust me, it’s not easy.”

  A kernel of information she could use. “I can take care of myself, you know. If there were no consequences, what would you do?”

  “Don’t ask me that,” he commanded, his lips thinning.

  “Too late. Answer the question.”

  Liam took the tape, placed it on a shelf beside him, and took two steps forward to come within a breath of her. Macy instantly tipped her head up to keep her eyes locked onto his. Her heart pounded in her chest as silence settled heavy around them.

  “What would I do?” he repeated in that low, throaty tone that sent shivers down her spine. “I’d forget the fact that we want completely different things. I’d take what you’re offering with that look in your eyes. And I damn well wouldn’t stand by and listen as yet another man asks you out on a date.”

  So, he’d heard Tanner earlier and jealousy was now rearing its ugly head. Finally, they were getting somewhere. Now probably wasn’t the time to state that she and Tanner were just good friends. That murderous look in Liam’s eye told her he wouldn’t believe her.

  “Maybe you should ignore the what-ifs and do what you want,” she suggested, feeling bolder than usual. Swallowing, she added, “What we both want.”

  His gaze dropped to her mouth, then back up to her eyes. “Is that why you turned down a date for tonight? You waiting on me to let my guard down with you?”

  Something about that ego of his was so damn sexy. Probably because she rarely saw him show that side.

  “Maybe,” she replied. In a risky move, she ran her palms up over his chest, pleased when he sucked in a breath and froze. “Maybe I’m tired of playing games, of dancing around the tension. Maybe I want to know what would happen if we pretended nothing else mattered, nothing existed but what we’re feeling.”

  “But everything does exist.”

  She was breaking him down. She could tell by his tone, by the way he stared at her mouth.

  “For two minutes, let’s pretend it doesn’t,” she challenged. “For the next two minutes we’re going to be honest with each other. Nothing leaves this place. Deal?”

  He dropped his forehead to hers. “You make a man want to forget everything except tasting you, pleasing you.”

  Arousal swirled around in her stomach. She’d asked for honesty and he delivered. His lips slid back and forth across hers.

  “I shouldn’t want you like this,” he muttered, as if reprimanding himself. “But I can’t focus on anything else when you’re right here.”

  Macy slid her hands up around his neck and threaded her fingers through his hair. She closed her eyes, silently begging him to kiss her, to touch her. Why was he constantly pushing her away when he was so transparent about what he wanted?

  “You want two minutes of honesty?” he asked, skimming those lips along her jawline. “If I thought for a second I could have you and there would be no consequences or feelings involved, I’d have you laid out on that counter before you could draw your next breath.”

  The image his words construed were gloriously beautiful. Although the large windows on the front doors would provide outsiders with quite a different view of her family’s small-town hardware store and bring a whole new meaning to the name Knobs and Knockers.

  Liam’s hand spanned her waist, gliding up her sides as his thumbs teased the undersides of her breasts. Macy arched into him, craving so much more than these light touches.

  “You’re the only one holding us back,” she whispered.

  “I am,” he agreed. “Neither one of us is in a place for this. Just . . . give me one more minute.”

  She’d give him all the minutes he wanted if he’d just keep caressing her. Macy couldn’t handle his mouth being so close, teasing her so intensely. She turned her head, catching his heavy-lidded gaze before he slammed his lips onto hers. Wrapping his arms around her, he flattened his hands on her backside and pulled her body flush with his.

  Yes. This is exactly what she was talking about. They were finally getting somewhere.

  His tongue tangled with hers as he walked her back toward the stairwell. For privacy? How far was he taking this? She silently pleaded for him not to put on the brakes, to take her upstairs where they could continue to explore. And why had she said two minutes? Why didn’t she say an hour? The entire evening?

  When her back hit the wall, Liam’s mouth traveled down her jaw, over her neck, and toward her ear. Macy shifted her head and sighed as wave after wave of arousal pummeled her.

  Macy slid her fingers through his hair as his breath tickled the side of her neck. When his hands slid around her waist, jerking her tank from her jeans, Macy’s belly clenched with both shock and anticipation.

  The jerk on the snap of he
r jeans had her moaning, then biting her lip to keep from begging. The zipper slowly eased down and a half second later Liam’s large palm settled across her lower abdomen.

  “I can’t stop myself.” His tortured tone growled into her ear. “I need to touch you.”

  Then they were definitely on the same page because she was about one breath away from pleading with him. The second his hand started roaming lower, she stepped wider, cursing her jeans and the restriction.

  Macy wanted to feel him, too. Needed to have his taut skin beneath her hands. She slid her fingertips beneath his shirt, pulling the material up as she explored.

  But then Liam touched her exactly where she ached for him and Macy suddenly forgot about everything else as she dug her nails into his back. Dropping her head back against the wall, she let out another moan, not even caring what she sounded like.

  “You’re so damn sexy,” he muttered as he used his lips on her collarbone. “Don’t hold back.”

  As if that was an option?

  Macy jerked her hips, needing more. She couldn’t believe this was happening, but she wasn’t about to question it, either. Liam was touching her, torturing her in the most satisfying of ways, and she’d never felt so turned on, so disoriented and caught up in the moment.

  His finger slid over her, into her, and Macy rocked her hips harder. Still digging her nails into his back, she let the emotions wash over her, let Liam give her pleasure.

  When he pumped faster, Macy couldn’t hold back another second. Her entire body seemed to let go, shattering in his arms as the climax slammed into her. She heard him muttering something, but she couldn’t focus on anything other than how amazing her body felt, how perfect this moment was, and how she couldn’t wait to go upstairs and finish.

  When her body stopped trembling, Liam slowly pulled his hand away and eased back. His eyes remained on hers, but suddenly he wasn’t touching any part of her. A burst of cold air swept over her heated skin.

  Macy didn’t like that look she saw on his face. Didn’t like the fact he seemed to be sliding up some invisible wall between them.

  Something between torture, pain, and sorrow all mixed in and stared back at her as the cold, harsh reality came crashing back.