The Motherhood Mix-Up

by Taylor, Jennifer

  ‘Oh, that was scary,’ she said, giving him another cuddle. She smiled at him. ‘But Harry’s fine now. Your daddy got him out of the water and he’s promised not to go near it ever again.’

  ‘It was my fault he fell in,’ Noah said in a rush. ‘I didn’t catch the ball and it landed in the water and Harry had to get it.’

  ‘It wasn’t your fault,’ she said firmly. ‘Harry knew he shouldn’t go near the river.’

  Noah considered that for a second. ‘It was my fault that Mummy crashed her car.’

  Mia managed to hide her surprise, although she had a feeling that this was the real root of the problem. ‘I’m sure that isn’t true, darling. It was an accident.’

  ‘No, it was my fault. I started crying and Mummy got angry and didn’t see the bus coming.’ Tears filled his eyes. ‘I don’t want a new daddy. You won’t let Mummy make me live with her and my new daddy, will you, Mia? She said that my old daddy doesn’t want me any more so can I live with you and Harry?’

  Mia didn’t know what to say. It was worse than she had imagined, far, far worse, and not just because of what Noah must have been going through for all these months. All of a sudden she was overwhelmed by doubts, by thoughts so dark that she felt sick. Had Leo known that his ex-wife had been planning to take Noah away from him? Was that why once he’d discovered that Noah wasn’t his real son, he had set out to find the child who was? Was Harry to be some sort of trade-off, offered in Noah’s place?

  She didn’t want to believe that Leo would do such a terrible thing but she knew how much he loved Noah and how desperate he was to keep him. He had been so ambiguous about his ex-wife’s involvement, too. She had put it down to the fact that he had little time for Amanda after the way she had abandoned Noah as a baby, but maybe there was another explanation. Had he deliberately played down Amanda’s involvement so that she wouldn’t become suspicious?

  Mia’s head reeled as thoughts rushed this way and that. It was only the fact that Noah needed reassuring that helped her hold it together. She tilted his face and looked into his eyes so that he would see that she meant every word.

  ‘No one is going to take you away from your daddy, my love. Mummy was wrong when she said that Daddy doesn’t want you any more because he does. He loves you an awful lot and he’ll do everything he can to make sure you stay with him. Do you understand?’

  Noah nodded, his face relaxing into a smile as he put his arms around her and hugged her. Mia hugged him back, although her heart felt like lead. Was she right to suspect that Leo had had an ulterior motive all along? Had he been lulling her into a false sense of security, playing on her emotions to get what he wanted, which was Noah living with him? Even sleeping with her could have been part of his plan and that was the worst thought of all, to wonder if he had used her that way too.

  Mia took a deep breath, forcing back the tears that threatened to overwhelm her. She didn’t want to believe that Leo could have done such a thing but after everything that had happened to her as a child, she couldn’t rule it out. The fact that she might have put Harry at risk by her gullibility was very hard to accept but she had to face it. Even if Leo hadn’t planned this, there was still Amanda to consider.

  Although Amanda hadn’t wanted Noah initially, people changed and she could have changed too. Maybe she had found it difficult to bond with him, somehow sensing that he wasn’t hers.

  Mia’s heart filled with dread. It would definitely explain Amanda’s past behaviour. She’d always found it hard to believe that any woman could reject her own child but there may have been a reason for it, a good one too. Now, if Amanda was so desperate for a child, she could very well try to claim Harry, her real son. And Leo might help her if it meant he could retain custody of Noah.

  * * *

  Leo could barely contain his anxiety. Mia seemed to be taking an inordinately long time, he thought as he made Harry a mug of hot chocolate. He added cold milk to cool it down then placed it on the table, forcing himself to smile. He didn’t want Harry to know how worried he felt.

  ‘Here you go. Drink this up and then we’ll see if Noah is feeling better.’

  Harry buried his face in the mug, gulping down the treat with obvious pleasure. When he asked if he could have a biscuit, Leo nodded. He found the tin and let the child choose what he wanted, glancing at the clock while Harry debated. How much longer was Mia going to be?

  He put the tin away, looking round in relief when he heard her footsteps. She smiled as she came into the kitchen but Leo could see the strain in her eyes and his heart turned over. It was obvious that something had happened. However, with Harry there he couldn’t ask her what it was. It was another ten minutes before Mia took Harry back to bed. Leo waited with mounting impatience for her to return. He needed to know what was going on and needed to know it soon! She came in and sat down, her face set as she looked at him.

  ‘I expect you’re anxious to know what was wrong with Noah,’ she said in a cold little voice he had never heard her use before. It struck fear into his heart so that he had to sit down as well.

  ‘Obviously,’ he replied equally coldly, because he didn’t want her to know how scared he felt.

  ‘It appears that Noah believed he was responsible for that accident he and his mother had.’

  She didn’t try to dress it up and Leo realised that there was more to it than that. It was an effort to reply calmly when it felt as though his insides were churning.

  ‘That’s ridiculous. It wasn’t Noah’s fault and I’ll make sure he understands that.’

  ‘Good. And while you’re doing that, I suggest you make sure he understands that you still want him.’ She shrugged, ignoring his stunned gasp. ‘It appears that your ex-wife told him he was going to live with her and his new daddy because you no longer wanted him. When he started crying, she got angry and crashed into the bus.’

  ‘I don’t believe it!’ Leo leapt to his feet, unable to sit there and listen to such rubbish. ‘Amanda actually told him that I didn’t want him?’

  ‘So it seems.’ She shrugged again. ‘Are you saying you didn’t know?’

  ‘Of course I didn’t know!’ he exploded, stunned that she would think he’d had any inkling. ‘If I’d known Amanda had told him that, I’d have done something about it.’

  ‘Maybe you did.’ Her expression was glacial. It matched her tone and Leo felt his blood run cold.

  ‘And what’s that supposed to mean? Come on, spit it out. Something is obviously bothering you.’

  ‘You’re right. It is.’

  She stood up as well and he realised that she was trembling. It was hard to stand there and not go to her, but he knew that it wasn’t what she wanted. Leo steeled himself because he also knew that whatever she said was going to hurt. A lot.

  ‘You found out what your ex-wife was planning and took steps to avoid it. That’s why you were so keen to find Harry, Amanda’s real son.’ She gave a broken laugh. ‘What was the plan, Leo? Was Harry to be a trade-off—you’d get to keep Noah while she had Harry, and both of you would be happy?

  ‘Maybe you two planned it together—who knows? Well, even if you did, I’m sorry to have to tell you that it isn’t going to happen. I shall fight you through every court in the land if either of you tries to take Harry away from me. He’s my son and he always will be mine!’

  She spun round but Leo didn’t move. He couldn’t. He was so stunned by the accusation that he couldn’t move a muscle. Did Mia honestly believe he would do that? Sink so low as to take her child so he could give him to another woman? He couldn’t begin to explain how it made him feel to know that she thought him capable of that kind of deception.

  He sank down onto a chair and put his head in his hands. Last night he had reached previously unknown heights of pleasure, of happiness, of joy. And tonight he had sunk to the very depths of despair.r />
  * * *

  It was raining again the following morning. Mia carried her case downstairs and placed it by the door. The taxi was due shortly and she wanted to be ready to leave as soon as it arrived. Harry trailed after her, looking mutinous as he placed his bag next to hers.

  ‘Why do we have to go, Mummy? Noah’s staying so why can’t I stay with him?’

  ‘It’s just not possible, sweetie.’ Mia tried to smile but her lips refused to obey her. ‘Noah and his daddy want to spend some time on their own.’

  ‘Don’t they want me to stay with them?’ Harry asked, looking puzzled.

  ‘Yes, we’d love you to stay, Harry. But your mummy has things to do and that’s why you have to go home.’

  Mia glanced round when Leo came to join them. His face was set and it was impossible to guess how he was feeling. He smiled at Harry and her heart filled with pain when she realised what a good actor he was. Nobody could tell from looking at him how devastated he must feel that his plans had been scuppered. It made her wonder if his so-called delight in their lovemaking had been an act too. If it had, it had certainly convinced her.

  Her eyes swam with tears so it was a relief when the taxi sounded its horn. Picking up her case, she shooed Harry out of the door. Leo followed her out, laying a detaining hand on her shoulder.

  ‘I’ll be in touch as soon as I get back, Mia.’

  Mia didn’t say a word as she shook him off. She helped Harry into the cab and fastened his seat belt then fastened her own. She didn’t look back as the driver pulled away and had no idea if Leo was waiting to wave them off. Whatever they’d had...whatever she’d thought they’d had...was over.

  * * *

  Mia was relieved when the half-term holiday ended and Harry went back to school. He’d been sulky and out of sorts ever since they’d got back from the cottage, obviously blaming her for cutting short the treat. He cheered up on the Monday morning, though, waving happily as she saw him into his classroom, and she breathed a sigh of relief. Although the worst certainly wasn’t over, at least Harry was back to his old self and that was something to be grateful for.

  She went into work to find that Penny had put her down for the cardiology unit again. Sister Thomas had booked a week’s leave and Penny wanted her to cover. Mia shook her head.

  ‘No, I’m sorry. You’ll have to find someone else.’

  ‘There isn’t anyone else, or at least no one who can handle the redoubtable Leo Forester,’ Penny told her with a grin. ‘All the staff agree that he’s a changed person when you’re on the unit, Mia. Obviously, you know how to bring him to heel!’

  It was just too much on top of all the sleepless nights she’d spent worrying about what Leo intended to do about Harry. Tears poured down her face and Penny leapt up in alarm.

  ‘Hey, what’s the matter, love? If it was what I said, then I’m sorry. I was only teasing.’

  ‘It isn’t that. It’s everything. Leo and Noah and Harry and me.’

  Mia knew she wasn’t making sense but there was nothing she could do. When Penny sat her down, she didn’t protest. What if Leo used his vast resources to take Harry from her; what would she do?

  ‘Come on, tell me what’s wrong.’ Penny patted her shoulder. ‘I’m the soul of discretion and I won’t repeat a word of what you say.’

  It was too tempting. Mia let it all pour out, all her fears, her hopes and her devastation. It was good to be able to tell someone and she felt much better afterwards, although Penny was open-mouthed with shock.

  ‘I don’t know what to say. I had no idea...’ Penny stopped and gulped. ‘What a mess, Mia. But are you sure that Leo was planning to take Harry off you so he could trade him for Noah?’

  ‘No. But it’s possible and that’s enough.’ Mia dried her eyes. ‘I won’t risk anything happening to Harry.’

  ‘I understand, really I do. But I can’t see any judge countenancing such an action.’

  ‘Not even if he was to be handed over to his real mother?’

  ‘With her track record?’ Penny shook her head. ‘No, I honestly can’t see it happening.’

  ‘But what if Leo and Amanda got back together? They might do, even on a temporary basis if it meant they would get what they wanted.’

  ‘Highly unlikely.’ Penny dismissed the idea. ‘Anyway, the papers are always banging on about the fact that courts try to keep a child with its mother even when they should be removed for their own safety.’

  ‘But that’s just it. I’m not Harry’s mother. Harry is Leo and Amanda’s son. Noah is mine and Chris’s.’

  ‘Then you’d have equal rights, I imagine, to sue for custody of Noah.’ Penny held up her hand when Mia went to speak. ‘I’m not saying you should do it, merely pointing out that you’re in the same position as Leo.’

  ‘Except I don’t have his money so I can’t hire a fancy lawyer to fight my case.’

  ‘There’s help available. Anyway, it’s not all down to money. Harry loves you. You’re his mum. Noah loves Leo. He’s his dad. There has to be a way to work this out and the only way to do that is by talking to Leo.’

  Mia summoned a watery smile. ‘Which is your very clever way of getting me to cover Cardiology.’

  ‘Yep!’ Penny gave her a hug. ‘You can do this, Mia. You can sort it out. I’m sure of that.’

  Mia hoped her friend was right, although she doubted it. She couldn’t imagine that Leo would want to invest too much time talking after the way they’d parted. She made her way to the cardio unit and started work, checking the theatre list to see who was scheduled for surgery that day. Leo’s name wasn’t on the list as one of the attending surgeons and she breathed a sigh of relief. At least she wouldn’t have to face him just yet.

  * * *

  Leo had spent the remainder of the week trying to get in contact with Amanda. She had changed her mobile number and he had to phone everyone he knew to find out where she was. In the end he tracked her down to a villa in the south of France where she was staying with friends. He kept it brief, explaining that Noah had told him about her plans and that if she thought she was going to take Noah from him, she could think again.

  He didn’t mention Mia or Harry; he couldn’t bear to. He simply made it clear that Amanda would regret it if she attempted to put her plan into action. Although it might not be the last he heard from her, at least she knew that she’d have a fight on her hands, and if there was one thing Amanda loathed it was doing anything that would upset her pampered life.

  With one problem if not solved at least addressed, he realised that he had to deal with an even bigger one. He still hadn’t got over his hurt and anger at Mia’s accusations but he knew he couldn’t leave it as it was. He was going to have to speak to her, assuming she would speak to him, of course.

  He drove to her house first thing on Monday morning, wanting to talk to her without Harry being there, but there was no reply when he knocked on the door. She must have gone into work, he decided, turning the car round. Although it wasn’t ideal to have an in-depth discussion in working time, he needed to get this sorted out. He couldn’t bear it if they were at loggerheads, couldn’t bear to imagine how worried she must be. He had to reassure her that he didn’t intend to take Harry away from her, no matter what happened.

  Maybe it was the fact that he was so distracted but he didn’t notice the van that suddenly pulled out of a side road until it was right in front of him. He slammed on the brakes but there was no way he could avoid it. There was a horrible crunching sound of metal striking metal and a roar as the airbag deployed and then silence, broken by the anxious voices of passers-by.

  Leo sat in the driving seat, feeling breathless and disorientated from the force of the airbag hitting his chest. He knew the car was quite badly damaged but that didn’t matter. What mattered more was that it would delay him spea
king to Mia.

  * * *

  Mia was getting into the lift after accompanying a patient to Theatre when she heard a couple of nurses talking. They were saying something about one of the consultants being brought into ED following an RTA but it was only when she heard Leo’s name that she started listening.

  ‘Excuse me, but did you say that Mr Forester was in ED?’ she asked, feeling a trickle of fear run down her spine.

  ‘Yes. Seems he crashed into a van,’ one of the nurses explained. Both women got out at the next floor so she didn’t have time to question them further but she knew that she couldn’t leave it at that. If Leo was injured she needed to know how bad he was.

  Her heart contracted as she pressed the button again, bypassing the cardio unit and heading to ED. There was a queue at the reception desk and she waited with mounting impatience for her turn. ‘I believe you have Mr Forester here?’ she said, trying to sound as cool and composed as possible, no mean feat when her heart was hammering away.

  ‘That’s right.’ The receptionist took note of her badge and grinned. ‘Checking to see if we’ll be keeping him here so you can have an easy ride today?’

  ‘Something like that,’ Mia agreed, dredging up a smile.

  ‘I don’t blame you. Anyway, Rob’s looking after him—he’s over there, the tall guy with the bald head.’

  Mia nodded her thanks and hurried over to the registrar. He shrugged when she asked him if Leo was badly injured.

  ‘We’re still running tests—CT scan, X-rays, bloods—so I can’t give you a definite answer. However, from the fuss he’s making, I doubt he’s on his way to meet the Grim Reaper today.’

  ‘Oh, right. Thank you,’ Mia murmured, feeling faint with relief. She went and sat down on a chair, wondering what to do.

  Despite the registrar’s assurances, she would have liked to see for herself that Leo was all right but would that be wise? She could be playing into his hands by showing her vulnerability, couldn’t she? For all she knew, he could have been plotting away, working with his ex-wife to take Harry off her...only she didn’t really believe that, did she? Not in her heart. Not where it truly mattered.