Staying True (Gay Romance)
Page 9
"I never did that before," Spencer told Troy as they left Donna's house. The music was fading behind them as they walked home in the glow of the streetlights.
"Suck a guy off in a closet?" Troy asked.
"Sixty-nine."
Troy looked at him and grinned. "OK. You're welcome."
"I wasn't thanking you," Spencer said and backhanded his arm. "And don't you get arrogant."
"It is nice to do something that's new to you too."
"It's all new," Spencer said under his breath and looked up at the sky. The streetlights were behind them now and only the moon lit their way home.
Having half heard him, Troy looked at him questioningly. Spencer didn't want to say any more. Even as he enjoyed Troy putting his arm around his shoulders, Spencer couldn't admit the truth. Being with Troy was like nothing he had ever felt before. Telling him that would be a mistake. Feeling that way was an even bigger mistake that was going to cost him in the end.
Knowing that, Spencer still reached for Troy's hand on his shoulder and pulled it over to his chest. That brought them even closer, and Spencer liked it too much to let go. He liked the casual way Troy's big arm draped over him. While Spencer put his own arm around his waist, he watched Troy's face light up with a smile while his brown eyes reflected the light of the moon.
Chapter 15
The next day, Spencer was visiting Marlene at work to report on Donna's party. He walked to the strip mall where brown roofs and brown lettering identified the nondescript storefronts. Among them was the fabric store where Marlene worked.
Spencer went in to the accompaniment of the old fashioned bell above the door. Spools of colorful fabrics hung in rows while others were stacked on top of each other and leaning in corners. There was always a group of older women by the cutting table. Spencer wasn't sure if they were the same ones or a different bunch each time. Marlene ignored them as she waved him over to her register. While telling her about the party, he couldn't avoid mentioning Troy.
"You rank amateur. What did you get yourself into?" she practically yelled at him.
"What are you talking about?" Spencer said as the old ladies all turned their heads to stare at him.
"Your moony face as soon as you mentioned his name," she said and jabbed her finger in his face. With her extremely long nails, she might as well have pulled a knife on him.
"It's just sex. Good sex. That's all," Spencer claimed. Then he slouched miserably and admitted the truth. "Maybe I'm into him more than I should be, but that's not the deal we made."
"Deals are made to be broken. You two should sit down and have a talk." As soon as she said the words, Marlene made a disgusted face.
Spencer called her on it. "You hate your own advice and you expect me to follow it?"
Marlene shrugged. "Not really. You two are destined to implode from internal tension and general fuck-upedness."
"Are you sure you're my friend? You seem bent on destroying my confidence and my winning spirit," Spencer accused her. He might be pitiful, but she had no pity for him at all.
"You have friend confused with cheerleader."
"You have friend confused with hired assassin," Spencer told her.
She was totally up for that. "In that case let me fulfill my assassin duties. Whatever you might feel for Troy, there is no way in hell he feels the same way about you." She paused for a beat while Spencer died inside. "But just in case he does, you need to fish or cut bait."
"What?"
"It's something my grandfather says to indecisive, wishy-washy pussies."
"Fuck you and fuck your grandfather. How is Greg more sympathetic than you? He's my landlord you're my alleged..."
"Assassin," she finished for him. "Quit whining and go get your man from whatever slut factory he's holed up in, drag him home and fuck his brains out."
"What do I look like to you? None of this is muscle," Spencer said while motioning down his body.
"You don't need muscle. You need balls."
"Which you have plenty of. So where is your boyfriend, oh wise and ballsy one?" Spencer stared at her then leaned in over her register. "I can't wait for you to fall hard and get your cold, dead heart pulverized."
Marlene smiled at him with approval. "See, now you're getting into the spirit of things. There might be hope for you yet."
Spencer left with his mind clouded by thoughts of Troy. Talk to him? Such a simple suggestion and so stupid. There was no way he was doing that.
Like Troy would want to settle for the first guy he slept with, a skinny, nerdy guy, who only lucked into being his first because he lived in the room next door. Spencer might be pissed at Marlene for being so viciously blunt, but she was right. His feelings for Troy spelled doom, and he only had total wretchedness to look forward to.
When he jumped into this, Spencer didn't care what the terms were. He ignored the warning signals going off in his head. In most ways nothing had changed. He still craved Troy, his kiss and his touch. Getting what he wanted only made him want more. His whole body ached with the need to be wrapped in Troy's big, strong arms.
*
That day at work, Troy had a flashback to the way things used to be. A new girl asked him out on a date. It was her first day, and she had flirted with him whenever she got a chance.
Troy wasn't surprised when she asked him out, but his reply was something new. "I'm gay," he told her and he couldn't keep a smile off his face.
She frowned for a second then she said, "I bet you're seeing someone. The way you smiled is a total giveaway."
"Me? Kind of," he said. He wasn't sure if that was true or not. But what could he say about Spencer? That he was a guy he thought about all the time? That quitting time was like a starter's pistol going off, bringing him almost within reach of him? That Troy wanted to sprint home and tackle Spencer to the floor as soon as he walked in the door? He was kind of seeing him, and he was kind of obsessed with him. One day soon, he would be seeing lots of guys. Any day now.
On his way home from work, Troy couldn't wait to get his hands on Spencer. He was walking on the wide sidewalks under the big trees. The shade was speckled with patches of sunshine that reminded Troy of the sunbeam he had seen on Spencer's naked back right above the perfect and irresistible curve of his ass. The line of his back was like an invitation, rising toward his shoulders, dipping before rising again to lead his eye to his ass.
Maybe the way he wanted Spencer was a little bit out of control. Every time he thought of him, Troy felt a rush of excitement. But there was another feeling lurking right behind the fiery need for Spencer's body. There was the desire to fuck him and to hold him tight. Those two things together made him want to tell Spencer to forget every other guy who might be out there.
Troy knew that he was having stupid urges like those because he never got to learn to deal with the rush of feelings that sex ignited. Since he got started late, Troy was now in too much of a hurry to experience it all at once – his first fuck with a man and his first love were getting all mixed up in his head.
If he asked Spencer for advice, he could set him straight. He could already see Spencer looking at him with pity as he tried to let him down easy. Nope. That was an experience he could do without.
Troy was in no hurry to get his heart crushed. He would be in love one day and probably regret it. What he cared about right now was sex and only sex, preferably with a really hot guy. For tonight that guy was Spencer, but that was only to start with since he was obsessed with his ass. Any day now, Troy would move on and a whole world of amazing sex would open up to him.
That pep talk was all well and good, but after Troy bounded up the stairs and saw that Spencer wasn't home, he was crushed. At first only because he couldn't get his hands on him after pining for him all day. Then he started to wonder where Spencer might be.
He might be with another man right now. Troy panicked at the thought. Why the hell did he let him go? It was all his fault if Spencer was with someone else. He shoul
d have locked him down. Fuck experience, he wanted Spencer and he wanted him now.
Troy looked at his phone then put it away. He wasn't going to text him. What he should do is go out and see who else was out there. It was too early for that, but when time was right, Troy would be living his life, not pining for Spencer.
Chapter 16
Early on a Saturday, Spencer was loitering in the hall outside of the apartment, texting and waiting for some laundry to get done. Leaning against the railing, he listened for the buzz of the dryer. What he heard instead was the squeak of the front door and running footsteps coming up the stairway. That was Troy coming up the stairs. Sweaty and out of breath, he was wearing a t-shirt and shorts. Both were stuck to him a little, making him look extra hot.
"I was wondering where you ran off to," Spencer punned.
"I have to keep in shape for all the sex I plan on having," Troy told him and grinned. "Want to take a shower with me?"
Spencer shook his head. "Already took one."
Troy's face fell.
"But I will wait for you in my room," Spencer said and watched Troy's face light up.
Looking happy, he jogged into the apartment. "Meet you there," he said over his shoulder.
An armful of his clothes fresh from the dryer and still warm got dumped on Spencer's bed. The pile of laundry kept him busy until Troy showed up at his bedroom door. His hair was wet from the shower but he had put on a fresh change of clothes. Spencer didn't know why he bothered.
"I was picturing you posed sexy and butt-naked on the bed, not fully dressed and folding laundry," Troy complained finding him bent over a stack of t-shirts.
Spencer finished folding the last t-shirt then straightened to face him. "I'm only your practice. I don't need to seduce you."
Troy confirmed it. "No, you don't. You're doing fine even without trying." He locked the door and tackled Spencer to the bed.
"Hey! Respect my hard work," Spencer said and pointed out his neatly folded t-shirts. Troy didn't look properly chastised so Spencer had to get serious. "Behave yourself. I'm ready to wrestle you into submission, you know."
Lifting himself up on his arms, Troy looked down at him and managed not to laugh in his face. Spencer took the opportunity to squirm out from under him so he could put away the t-shirts before they got dumped on the floor. Troy growled and reached for him to pull him back into bed. As he closed the t-shirt drawer, Spencer evaded him playfully. Troy went along with it then made a sudden grab for Spencer and had him pinned in an instant.
"I'm at your mercy now," Spencer said with a gleam of challenge in his eyes.
Troy smiled down at him then swooped in for a hard kiss. As he kissed him, Troy reached under his shirt and up over his abs. With Troy's hot palms on his chest, Spencer shivered. His hands were on the back of Troy's neck as his tongue explored his mouth. Spencer reached up and his fingers got lost in the short strands of his wet hair.
Troy's muscular weight felt so right on top of him. Then Troy rubbed up against him, his hard cock distinct as it jabbed his thigh. Spencer was ready for Troy to take him right now. Troy reached down, lifted Spencer's legs up and grabbed his ass. He slid his palm around, between Spencer's legs, driving him wild. Spencer moaned in his ear and breathed hard.
"Are we going to fuck?" Troy asked hopefully.
To answer his question, Spencer reached into his nightstand drawer and tossed him condoms and lube. Troy grunted in appreciation then kissed him even harder than before.
Getting each other stripped was not a smooth operation. They grappled with each other's shirts and zippers, neither willing to back down and miss out on the chance to feel some naked skin.
Spencer didn't want to stop kissing and groping Troy, but he needed him inside. He rolled over so he was face down on the mattress, leaning on his elbows, ass up. Breathing hard, he writhed as Troy ran his hands up and down the back of his thighs and fondled his ass. He couldn't wait for Troy to fuck him again. Spencer shifted so his ass was even higher in the air and Troy groaned at this unspoken invitation.
His strong hands pushed Spencer's knees further apart so he could make room for himself between them. Taking his position, Troy started lubing him. Spencer gasped feeling Troy's finger twisting inside him. That was new. Troy paused.
"Oh, God don't stop," Spencer begged him.
Carefully, Troy worked in one more finger. Twisting his fingers gently, he made Spencer buck and moan desperately. When Troy removed his fingers and shifted on the bed, Spencer shuddered and begged mindlessly. "Please, please, please."
Troy didn't disappoint him. The head of his cock was soon at Spencer's hole, pressing in. So big, it opened him up like nothing ever had before. A steady push of Troy's powerful body drove his cock deep inside. With a final grunt, Troy filled him up.
Spencer cursed and panted. It was too much, but it felt so good.
"You're a drug," Troy whispered in his ear breathlessly. "I think I'm addicted."
Troy pulled back slowly and Spencer clawed at the sheets. He rocked back and moaned. His head dropped to the bad as he took it all in one more time. Another slow thrust followed, but Spencer just couldn't wait. He pushed back, eager for more.
"If that's what you want," Troy said and gave it to him.
Now Spencer trembled under the power of his thrusts. He was being hammered and his bed was taking a serious punishment too. The headboard was slamming into the wall. His sheets were ripped off the mattress. Spencer couldn't hang on for much longer either.
His moaning intensified and he was coming. Troy was pounding him right through the most intense orgasm of his life. Then he was coming too and his groans turned into contented sighs as he breathed against Spencer's neck.
They both turned a little as they fell to the bed and Troy wrapped his arms around Spencer.
"Let's just stay like this," Troy murmured into his ear, but Spencer knew he would change his mind as soon as he recovered his senses. Until then, Spencer enjoyed the feel of Troy wrapped around him.
"You're like... a door to heaven," Troy told him after a little while.
For a moment Spencer was speechless. "You weren't bad yourself," he finally said.
"I'll do even better next time," Troy said and kissed his shoulder.
That's when Spencer noticed the state of his sheets. "You made me mess up my sheets," he complained.
"You had nothing to do with that?" Troy said pointing to the stain Spencer had made.
"You'll be helping me get these sheets off so I can wash them," Spencer told him though he wouldn't be ready to get up any time soon.
"More laundry?" Troy groused.
"You have no right to complain. We already established it was your fault."
Troy looked like he was going to deny it so Spencer kissed him. He really didn't need much of an excuse.
They were half on top of each other on the narrow bed when Spencer heard raindrops hitting the window. He looked up and saw rivulets running down the windowpane. In the distance he could see lightning flash. The sound of thunder was faint and far away.
Troy already had one leg over him and an arm over his chest, but he still pulled him closer. "Sorry, I'm crushing you," he said, but Spencer didn't mind. Troy felt good to him. Being held through a rainstorm made him feel warm and drowsy.
They snoozed through lunchtime on a lazy Saturday with rain falling nonstop. Afterward they ordered some Chinese food. While they were waiting, Troy went to his room to get his phone.
As he loitered in the doorway of Troy's bedroom, Spencer noticed the sketches he hung up on the day he moved in.
"You promised to tell me about those, you liar," Spencer scolded him.
At first Troy didn't know what he was talking about. "Oh, those. A guy at my old college gave them to me as a parting gift at the end of the term. I didn't know him that well, but he heard that I came out. He told me they were my ideal man," Troy explained.
Spencer went over to take a closer look. He tilted his
head this way and that, then said the obvious, "Your ideal man is very sketchy."
Troy laughed. "He said that I had to figure out the rest, fill in the blanks."
"After sampling a couple of dozen guys," Spencer said.
"Or more," Troy threw in.
Spencer laughed, but inside he was dying to keep Troy all to himself. He knew that wasn't going to happen. He could see how eager Troy was to get out there and experience the sweet gay life he had missed out on.
When the food arrived, they sat on the couch, stole food from each other's plates and otherwise goofed off. Greg didn't want any. He and Joao were meeting some friends so he disappeared to get ready. Then it was almost like Spencer and Troy had the place to themselves.
It made Spencer daydream about what it would be like if it was only him and Troy. No, that would be no good. Without Greg, it would be too easy for Spencer to get confused, to mistake what they had for a relationship instead of an arrangement.
Their arrangement was simple. It should be easy enough for Spencer's stupid brain to understand. But his brain wasn't the problem. Troy made his heart ache and beat like crazy. His heart was an idiot.
Chapter 17
Once again Troy came home from work and found himself alone until night fell. He didn't know Spencer would be out. He shouldn't have been surprised though. Spencer had plenty of friends and he didn't need to inform Troy where he was spending his time.
Troy wasn't supposed to care this much anyway. That's why he didn't text Spencer to find out if or when he was coming home. That was something a boyfriend might do.
As he wandered around the empty apartment, Troy poked his head into Spencer's bedroom then took a step inside. He saw Spencer's t-shirt thrown over his chair and he put his hand on it, imagining he was touching Spencer. Closing his eyes he lost himself in the feeling. He went over and sat on his bed. Lying down, he placed his head on Spencer's beloved pillow and inhaled his scent.