Darkness Before Dawn

by Contreras, Claire

  "No, baby, she's not going to wake up," he replies sadly, as he, too, begins to cry while holding on to me.

  "Get her out of here!!" another man screams as he walks in, taking in the scene. His chest heaves rapidly as he looks between Mommy and me. "GET OUT!" he says louder.

  Mark carries me in his arms, my blood-soaked pajamas hanging heavily from my body and sticking to his, as he takes me to the black van.

  "Why my mommy?" I wail.

  I look up at Mark, his face suddenly becoming Benny's. "That wasn't your mommy," he says with a harsh laugh before pinning me with his crazed eyes. "That was you."

  I gasp, trying and failing to sit up. I cringe from the pain that runs from the tip of my head all the way down my body. I blink at the bright lights around me and blink some more until I can focus and see that I'm in a hospital. The last thing I remember is Dean holding my hand and telling me everything was going to be fine. A sudden shift in the bed fills my stomach with apprehension.

  "Oh, thank God," he says hoarsely and pulls my face into his hard chest. I squeeze my eyes shut and will my heart to slow because I know that my sick imagination is playing tricks on me again. I miss that voice so much it hurts. When I sniffle my tears, I'm consumed with his unmistakable fresh scent, and I know this has to be real…unless I'm dead.

  "Blake, look at me," he says quietly as he touches the side of my face and backs away from me a little. My breath starts coming out quickly, in gasps as I tilt my head and open my eyes slowly to meet the most brilliant green eyes I've ever seen. We stare at each other for a long moment with tears in our eyes, before his arms swallow my body in his, shielding me from everything—the light, the dark, and everything in between. For the first time in a very long time, I feel safe. Truly safe. My body begins to shake from my muffled sobs and I cling on to him tighter, not daring to let him go. I pour all of my angst out, trying to let go of the bad and really just grateful that I have something good. Finally.

  "Please don't leave me," I whisper against his chest once our sobbing calms. "Please, please don't let them take me away from you again."

  "Oh God, baby, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry I wasn't there. I'm so sorry they took you and I wasn't there to protect you. I'm sorry you had to go through that by yourself," he whispers hoarsely. I nod against him, inhaling his scent, that scent I missed so damn much and was beginning to forget.

  We separate and wipe our faces as we study each other. He lightly caresses my face with his thumb. "You have some bruising...and stitches on your head," he says with furrowed eyebrows.

  As I move away, I feel a heavy, gooey pool in between my legs. My eyes widen and I look at Cole, completely horrified. "What about-" I stop myself before I can continue because I already know the answer, but for some reason I need to hear somebody say it. I'm not even sure if he would have heard about it though.

  "What about what?" he asks, his hand stilling on my cheek when he registers the scared look in my eyes.

  "The baby," I whisper, dropping my gaze from his and holding my stomach with my hands.

  "I'm sorry," he replies huskily. I bury my face in my hands and let out a strangled, tearless sob before I take a couple of breaths, struggling for air. When I'm able to look at him again, I place my hand on top of his and we give each other a squeeze.

  "Me too," I reply quietly. "I should've tried harder."

  "No, Blake. You had nothing to do with losing the baby, please don't think that," he says, looking at me with loving eyes as he strokes my cheek softly.

  I nod, blinking away the tears pooling in my eyes again. He carefully adjusts my body to face his and we lay there for a long time cataloging every inch of each other's faces.

  He presses a kiss on my lips and for a moment I forget everything. I grab both sides of his face and plunge my tongue into his mouth. He groans deeply and grabs me by the back of the neck, pulling us as close together as we can be. I hear one of the monitors behind me start beeping uncontrollably, but I don't care to check it. Somebody clearing their throat causes us to break apart, but we don't look away from each other's eyes. In this moment I realize that I'm not sure how long I was kidnapped, but nothing, nobody, can hold me hostage like Cole's eyes can. "Welcome back, Blake. I'm glad to see you're feeling better. We got notified about the increase in heart rate so I came to check up on you. Now I know why it happened, though," she says with a smile and a raised eyebrow. "You should rest."

  I smile back at her, and just as I'm about to thank her, the door opens behind her and our heads turn to watch Aubry step in. He looks at me for what seems like an eternity before he buries his face in his hands and starts to cry. Cole shifts off the bed and walks over to him and hugs him, telling him that I'm okay before they walk over to me.

  "Cowboy," Aubry says, his voice wavering. "I can't..." he pauses to swallow, but doesn't say anything else, just sits where Cole was previously laying and pulls me into a hug.

  "I'm fine, Aub. You can't get rid of me or my laundry," I say, muffled into his chest.

  He laughs and pulls away from me as tears roll down his cheeks. "I missed you so fucking much, Cowboy. You don't even know."

  "Is she okay to walk?" Cole asks Dyann as she fixes my IV.

  "Sure, if she's up for it," she replies, looking at me with a smile before she leaves the room.

  "I missed you too, Aub," I mutter leaning the side of my head into his chest. He rests his chin on top of my head, and Cole moves to the other side of the bed to sit by my feet.

  For the next hour, we alternate between just staring at each other and verbalizing how much we missed each other. I ask them about Aimee, Greg and Becky and they ask me about where I was being kept and what was going on there.

  "You want me to get you some real food?" Aubry asks suddenly.

  "I would kill for a pizza right now," I respond, making them both chuckle.

  "Becky has been calling me non-stop since she heard, has she called you?" Aubry asks, looking at Cole.

  "My reception sucks in here. I wanted to let Blake rest anyway, and you know Becky-"

  "It's fine, I'll call her," I say.

  "I'm going to get you your pizza. Want something, Cole?" Aubry asks as he heads out.

  "Nah, thanks. I have everything I need right here," Cole replies, looking at me as he grabs my feet. When Aubry leaves, Cole moves back to his original spot beside me.

  "I was pregnant and now I'm not," I say quietly as I touch my flat stomach.

  "Shh, it's okay," he says as he strokes my hair softly. "Right now, the important thing is that you're here and you're okay."

  "But I lost our baby, Cole," I say before I start to sob again. "I lost your baby. I'm so sorry."

  "No, baby, no," he coos. "You didn't lose our baby. It just wasn't his time to come into our lives. He'll come back to us, you'll see."

  I wipe my tears away to look at him. I can tell it's taking a lot for him to say those words. "Do you really believe that?" I ask hopefully.

  "I do. I think everybody comes into our lives at the perfect time, and it just wasn't his time," he replies quietly before kissing the tip of my nose.

  "Thank you." I lean back on his chest.

  "I met my parents," he says suddenly, making me shift my body as much as it lets me.

  "What?" I gasp. "How? What happened?"

  "I went to their house with Aimee," he says with a shrug as if it's no big deal.

  "Cole! What happened? What made you finally do it?"

  "The same thing that makes me do all the crazy shit I do," he replies, shaking his head. "You."

  "Me?" I ask in confusion.

  "Baby, you'd been missing for over two weeks, I was desperate to find you. The cops had stopped searching, Mark was being an asshole. God, I have so much to tell you, but I want to make sure you're up for it, so I'll wait until we get out of here, okay?"

  I groan and throw my head back. "Just tell me about your parents."

  "So I went to their house...I saw the Home Alone house,
by the way."

  "Cole! Focus!" I interrupt impatiently.

  He leans in and grabs me by the nape of my neck before he pulls me in and ravishes my mouth, making the heart monitor beep wildly again. "God, I fucking missed you."

  "Cole," I plead.

  He groans. "I went to their house-" he pauses and puts up his hands to air quote, "my mom fainted, my dad couldn't believe it, we got into an argument, and we talked about how to keep your story in the public eye. Yada yada yada, big fucking welcoming. I've been in touch with them since. I'm sure they'll be around when Aimee tells them you're here. Only if you're up for it, though."

  I look at him and sigh. "I guess." I know I can't escape the press for too long, but if the mayor comes to visit me, it's going to be all over the papers and news and then they'll know where I am.

  "Not today. Nobody comes in here today. Today, you're mine and mine alone," he says as he presses his lips to my forehead. We wrap our arms around each other, exhaling tranquil breaths, until Aubry comes back into the room with the pizza. "And Aubry," Cole grumbles. "Of course, I have to share you with fucking Aubry."

  I laugh but stop when I get a pain in my side as I sit up slowly. Thankfully, my soreness is getting better, which I'm sure has to do with the last dose of morphine Dyann gave me.

  "There are a shit load of news trucks outside," Aubry announces as he puts the pizza box down.

  "Yeah, I figured," Cole replies. They both look at me for a while. I know they're dying to ask questions but are trying to give me time, and I appreciate it because I'm not ready to talk about everything I've been through.

  A loud knock on the door makes us pause mid-chew and put our slices of pie down. Cole calls out for them to come in, and when the door opens, we're greeted by police officers. My body instantly goes rigid. I haven't had time to think of what I'm going to tell the authorities. I didn't even have time to discuss it with Cole! As if he senses my discomfort, Cole places his hands over my fidgety fingers and holds them firmly.

  "How can we help you?" Cole asks, getting up from the bed to greet them.

  They introduce themselves as Detective Ginsburg and Officer Emmanuel, and ask to speak with me privately. Aubry steps out of the room, and after going back and forth with Cole, he sits down beside me and tells the officers to carry on with their visit because he's not leaving. They start off by asking me how I'm feeling and making small talk before drilling me with the more difficult questions, the ones I cannot answer.

  "Do you remember what happened the day they took you? What were you doing? Who had you spoken to? Where did they take you? Who took you? Did you catch any names? Did you see their faces?"

  They're all completely valid questions, but I cannot answer them truthfully, so I do the only thing I can do. I lie. A lot.

  "I was getting ready to leave the park and head home, they knocked me unconscious so I couldn't see my kidnapper. I was kept in a dark room by myself and only saw them when they brought me food. They had their faces covered the entire time we interacted. I didn't catch any names. I'm sorry I can't help any more than that."

  The older gentleman, Detective Ginsburg, looks at me with disbelieving eyes and continues to ask more questions. At this point, his questions are in the form of demands, not leaving me much room to answer anything. He says I know who took me, I know where they kept me, and I did interact with them more than I say I did. His accusations make me angrier than they should. He's right, after all—I do know the answer to those questions. Still, the fact that he's trying to push me for answers bothers me.

  "Miss Brennan, we can provide you with security and put you in our protective plans so that you may live your life under the radar. Just help us find the people who did this to you. Don't you want to put this past you?" the detective asks in a softer voice than he's been using. Put it past me, that's one thing I wish I had learned to do years ago.

  "Baby," Cole says softly as he squeezes my hand so I will look at him. When I do, his eyes are pleading with me to tell them what they ask, but I can't. I convey that back to him with my own eyes, speaking our own silent language, and he stops squeezing my hand.

  "I'm sorry, detective, but I really don't remember anything. I was drugged the entire time I was there."

  As they excuse themselves, they hand me a card with their information on it and let me know they'll be in touch. I look at the card until it's blurry through my eyes and snap out of it when Cole caresses my back and brings me back to reality.

  "I don't trust them," I whisper.

  "I don't blame you," he whispers back while placing a kiss on my head.

  "What's up with your beard?" she asks, tugging the short hair on my face.

  "You like?" I ask, smiling and wagging my eyebrows for effect.

  "I hate," she replies, twisting her lips in disgust, making me laugh.

  "Why don't you go home to shower...and shave?" Blake crinkles her nose as she plucks my beard with her fingers. I smile in response. I was already thinking of doing that, but I'm waiting for Aubry and Aimee to get here. There's no way in hell I'm leaving her alone. Connor has been in the waiting room every day, and Mark comes around to check on her after work, but I need someone she feels completely safe with and that means Aubry. Bruce is back and watching her, along with a new guy, Spencer, but I only trust Aubry to watch her right now.

  "I will, baby, just relax," I respond, holding her close. The door opens and Dyann comes in wheeling in the blood pressure machine. She's the only nurse I can stand in this place, the other ones are nice enough, but they give me shit for sleeping next to Blake on the bed.

  "Hey, Blake, Cole, I'll be out of your hair in a minute," Dyann says as she stops next to Blake.

  "No worries, you know you're our favorite nurse," I reply with a smile, making her blush slightly.

  "Well, you're my favorite non-patient, Cole," Dyann says with a small smile. "Are you ready to go home, Blake? The doctor should be in here soon. I think you'll be getting discharged today."

  Blake shrugs slightly. "I guess," she says, her voice barely a whisper. I know she's scared of facing the real world again, even though she won't admit it to me. I give her hand a squeeze and she turns her face to give me a slightly reassuring smile. I frown at her and her smile gets a little bigger. I know it's going to take a little while for her to come to terms with the loss of our baby; it's going to take me some time too, but I have to be strong for her—for us.

  As Dyann is leaving, Aubry and Aimee are walking in with balloons and flowers. I shoot them a confused look as I get up to stretch.

  "Hey, guys," Blake says in her fake happy voice. Aubry and I look at each other, relaying the same message through our eyes, even though I know it's going to take a while to get our normal Blake back. It's only been three days, and although most of her bruises are fading, that's only in the exterior.

  "Hey, Cowboy," Aubry says as Aimee walks over and sits at the foot of her bed. "Cole, you going home then?"

  "Yeah, I'll be back soon. Don't leave this room. If you have to pee, grab the bedpan from under her bed and pee in that. And Dean isn't allowed in this room—period," I say, looking at Aubry and Aimee for emphasis. Dean has been here every day, but I refuse to let him see Blake. She knows he's been around and asked to see him once, but I put a stop to that shit real quick. I don't want him anywhere near her, and I'm pretty sure she won't fight me on this for now.

  "Eww, Cole, what the hell?" Blake says, sitting up and cringing as she raises her knees. "He can go to the bathroom when he wants."

  "Dude, I got it. I'm not an idiot," Aubry says before I reply to Blake. I walk over to her and lean down to give her a long kiss before leaving.

  When I walk by the waiting area, I see Connor talking to Dean, looking like they're plotting something. As I walk over to them, they stop talking and look at me expectantly. I look around and see Bruce sitting on one side glaring at Dean, and Spencer standing near the elevators. At least some people are taking this seriously.
/>   "You heading out?" Connor asks as he stands.

  "Going to take a shower and get Blake some stuff, I'll be right back," I reply, taking my eyes off his and narrowing them at Dean, who I can tell is trying to not smile at the news that I'm leaving. Between the smirk, the leather jacket that he doesn't need in this weather, and his perfect hair...I can't fucking stand his ass. The only thing I can stand seeing on him is the black eye on his face.

  "All right, well, I'll be here," Connor replies as he eyes his watch. "Fuck, five o'clock already."

  "Like I said, I'll be right back," I call out over my shoulder as I walk away.

  On my way home I call Greg and Becky to see if their flight landed. I can't make it to the airport to pick them up, but I want to leave them a key to my place so they can be there when Blake gets home. As happy as I am for Becky to be here, I'm also nervous about Blake seeing her pregnant so soon after she just lost our baby. They've been speaking every day, so Blake knows and says she's really happy about it. I guess we'll see.

  When I get to our place, I go straight to the fridge and make sure we have everything we need, but, of course, we don't. I take my phone out and dial Becky's number.

  "Didn't you just speak to Greg?" she greets.

  "Hello to you too, Becky. I did, but I need a favor. Can you guys go to the grocery store for me? I don't wanna leave Blake for too long and that shit takes me forever."

  She laughs. "Yeah, we'll go. Are you taking the key to the hotel?"

  "Yeah, I'll leave it at the front desk, though. I'm sorry I don't have time to wait for you, but you know."

  "Yeah, I know. Don't worry about it, we got you."

  Once that's settled, I shower and shave. I splash water on my face once I'm done and smile at my hairless face, a reminder that I finally got my girl back I start sorting through Blake's drawers, trying to pick something out for her, which is a bitch to do. I'm a good dresser; I know what looks good with what, but she has so many clothes. I end up choosing some loose, ripped jeans and a gray Foo Fighters T-shirt. I figure she'll want to be comfortable. Becky better not say shit about it, either.