Heart of the Music (Saints & Sinners #1)

by Kaithlin Shepherd

  “Just call him, you idiot,” she told herself, sipping on some more wine, but instead of doing what she really wanted, she opened her laptop, checked emails, and finalized a few interview bookings for the next string of tour dates.

  When she turned around to take in the beautiful view of the lake, her eyes landed on a picture of her and Jarrod taken two summers back while they hung out on the lake. Jarrod had a beer in one hand and held her close to him with his other arm. He had planted a big kiss on her cheek and Sam had snapped a picture. Her hair was everywhere, and she was make-up free, but that didn’t matter because she loved that picture. It showed the essence of who they were better than she could ever put into words. There was no fuss about their relationship. Spending time with him was as natural as breathing. She never had to pretend she was someone else when they were together, not only because he liked her just the way she was, but because he wouldn’t accept anything that wasn’t genuine from her.

  Trying to step out of her head, she opened her fridge to see what she could make for dinner and realized she was either going to have to order in or go to the store if she wanted to eat. She had been so caught up with Jarrod that she had completely forgotten to call her housekeeper to ask her to fill up her fridge for the weekend. She could worry about food later; right now, all she cared about was unwinding and freeing herself from the stress of the last couple of days.

  With her glass of wine in hand, Patricia headed toward the living room. It was one of her favorite rooms in the house. It was a large open space with a beautiful fireplace. This room always made her feel Zen. It was the room where she and Jarrod had watched movie after movie, where she and the guys had celebrated birthdays and holidays. This room had so many memories already, but she couldn’t wait to make some new ones.

  Jarrod

  While Jarrod did the rounds at the grocery store, he couldn’t help but think of Trish’s face when he showed up on her doorstep. When their plane had landed in Nashville, he had simply told her he would see her later. He wanted to surprise her and do something special. He knew her fridge would be empty since they had been running around like crazy lately and he knew she hadn’t had the chance to call her housekeeper, which she probably only realized when she opened her fridge. So after he went home and took a shower, he headed to the grocery store near her house to buy enough food to feed them for the next two days because he had no intention of letting her out of that house. He wanted to be selfish and keep her for himself, and nothing anyone said would change his mind. When he pulled into the parking lot of the local grocery store, his phone rang with his mom’s face flashing on the screen.

  “Hi, Mom.” Jarrod loved his mother more than he could ever express. Every good thing he knew about loving someone right came from her. He remembered how supportive she had been when he told her he was dropping out of school to pursue a music career. Not once had she made him feel like he was a disappointment, or that what he was doing was a mistake. She was still his biggest fan.

  “Hey, baby, just wanted to make sure you got home okay.” It didn’t matter that he was a grown man nearing thirty; she worried about him just as much now as she did when he was sixteen—a fact she always said he would understand when he had children of his own.

  “I landed a couple of hours ago. I just pulled into Gracie’s to grab some groceries before I head out to Trish’s for the weekend.” His mother absolutely loved Trish, and he understood the feeling all too well. He could practically hear his mother smiling. For years, she’d been pushing him to make a move, to stop being such a coward, and now that it was finally happening, he could hear the ‘I told you so’ in her voice.

  “Oh, that’s nice. She’s going to love having some company. I should give her a call soon to invite her to dinner next time you guys are in town.” His mom’s voice was filled with joy whenever she talked about him coming home to the house Patricia had helped him pick for his mom. The first things he had done after getting his first big pay check was buy himself and his mom new houses.

  “I’m sure she would love that, Mom.” That was the truth. Trish loved his mom just as much as they loved her. She had no family, and they always made an extra effort to make her feel welcomed. He knew they couldn’t imagine not having her around for Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner.

  “Well, now, you just be careful not to break her heart, you hear me, son? That girl has been through enough.” He knew that better than anyone. Everything she’d given up to ensure their dream became a reality weighed on his mind daily. But he had a plan now, and that plan consisted of making her happy for as long as she allowed him. He didn’t care what he had to do to make it happen. He would give her the moon if she asked him. But, he knew that with Trish, the things that made her happy, were the little things. It was one of the things he cherished about her. They could be stuck in the middle of nowhere, and she would happily sit in the grass, watching the stars.

  “Don’t worry, Mom. I don’t intend to hurt her.” I intend to love her until the day I fucking die, crossed his thoughts. God, the images of her in a white wedding dress and then pregnant with their child crossed his mind as well, and he never wanted to let go of that picture. He loved his mom, and he wanted to have a family of his own, one where he could love his children as much as she had loved him growing up. And he couldn’t imagine doing that with anybody other than Trish.

  “Good! Well, you two kids have fun,” his mom said on the other line.

  “I love you, Mom.” He missed her. He would make sure he visited her the next time he had a few days off.

  “I love you, too, honey.”

  He made his way into the store, making sure to grab all of Trish’s favorites. He wanted to do something for her for a change, give her the chance to relax. When he got to the register, he smiled at the woman behind the counter. “Well, won’t you look at what the cat dragged in?” Norma had been working at this store for over twenty years, and it seemed that every time he came by, she was there.

  “Norma, you just get more beautiful every time I see you.” He turned on the charm, and with a smirk, he leaned over the counter and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. As Norma, scanned his items, they made small talk about the tour and Jarrod asked about her grandkids.

  When she scanned the box of condoms, she looked up at him and smiled. “You two finally decided to stop being idiots, I see.” The old woman smiled at him.

  “We’re trying, that’s for sure.” Norma seemed to know everything that happened in this neighborhood.

  “Well, it’s about damn time. That girl has been in love with you for years, and you, boy, have been in love with her for just as long. I don’t know why you two waited so damn long!”

  “We’re stubborn,” he told her.

  Norma took hold of his hand, squeezing it. “Love is a scary thing because it means opening yourself up to the chance of being hurt, but it also means allowing yourself to be truly and wonderfully happy.”

  He gave her another quick kiss before heading out, smiling like a kid in a candy store. After the grocery store, he made a quick stop at a little bakery that made Trish’s favorite chocolate cake, then made another stop at the liquor store. He was then all set.

  Over the last few weeks, his life had completely changed. He was the happiest he’d ever been. Patricia had a way of bringing the best out in him. It didn’t matter what was going on in his life, the minute he saw her, or heard her voice, all of his worries disappeared. He was in love with her, and he would bet his life that she felt the same way. He wanted to take these two days away from the bus, the fans, the shows, the interviews, and all the craziness of being on the road, and just focus on the two of them.

  When he pulled into her driveway, he couldn’t help but feel at home. He’d always loved her house because it felt like a home where you could raise a family in, and he knew that was partly why she had fallen in love with the house the minute she saw it four years earlier. As the car came to a stop, he smiled at the memories
of that day when she had asked him to come house shopping with her. Signing those papers had been one of the most important moments of her life, and he’d felt like a lucky bastard that he witnessed it.

  He collected the bags from the trunk and made his way to the front door. He could hear music and Trish singing from inside the house. The woman couldn’t sing to save her life, but listening to her destroy songs always made him smile. He knocked and rang the doorbell, and when she answered the door, he almost dropped all of the bags on the ground. She was wearing her yoga pants that gave him a hard-on every time she wore them with a tank top that didn’t leave much to the imagination.

  “Jarrod, what are you doing here?”

  “Well, I figured since you probably didn’t have food, I would stock up on some provisions, hence the bags, and then I thought to myself that all of this food was more than enough for two people. So I thought I would crash your party.”

  Not giving her time to object, he took a step forward, gave her a quick kiss, tasting the wine on her lips, and made his way into the kitchen. “So I got enough food to last us for two days.”

  “Us?” Her dipped brows and head tilting to the side made him smile. God, he loved how she never expected him to be there for her, because it allowed him to surprise her over and over again.

  “Yeah, us… me and you,” he told her with a smirk, while putting the food away.

  She was feeling unbalanced, and that was exactly what he wanted. He needed her to understand that this thing between them was for the long haul. It wasn’t something that would stay only while they were on the road.

  She walked behind the counter and helped him put the food away until she found the chocolate. Then he was on his own. The woman had three weaknesses: shoes, coffee and chocolate. The instant she saw the wrapped bar, she took it in her hands, unwrapped it, and, had a piece in her mouth within seconds, before dropping the chocolate back on the counter. She moaned softly… and he was just a man. With every moan she made, his cock grew harder behind the fly of his jeans. He leaned back against the counter and watched her almost have an orgasm on the spot.

  “Enjoying that over there?” he asked, thinking about her making those sounds while he was buried deep inside her, feeling nothing else but her around him.

  “It’s almost orgasmic. You want to try it?” she whispered, her voice sounding raspier than he’d ever heard it.

  This had to be hell. He had planned on making her dinner and romancing her before he fucked her senseless again, but seeing her eat that chocolate and hearing her sweet moans had him thinking about fucking her on the kitchen counter. He’d be damned if watching her play with him wasn’t the sexiest thing ever.

  “Oh, I’d love a taste of something all right.” He didn’t make a move toward her, though. He was hell-bent on waiting for her to come to him.

  He didn’t have to wait long. Trish slowly moved toward him, grabbing a piece of chocolate off the counter, and he couldn’t wait to see where she was going with this. She stood inches away from him as she took a bite out of the chocolate and moaned softly again, the sound bouncing off his body, waking up every cell in him. She didn’t move and she didn’t touch him; she just stood there, looking gorgeous as hell. And then she almost drove him to the edge.

  She leaned forward, ran her tongue over her lips, and after what seemed like forever, she finally pressed her mouth to his. He forced himself to take the kiss slow at first, but with her biting his lower lip every chance she got, his control wouldn’t last long. Pulling away from her, he looked into her eyes to see if she was feeling the same things he was. When he saw passion and need in those big brown eyes, that was all he needed to know.

  He pushed her back against the counter with his hips, with one hand on the back of her neck, the other one holding on her hip. “I wanted to take my time and romance you, but the way you look right now makes me want to fuck you right here, right now.” When he heard her sigh, he knew she needed this as much as he did. It fueled his need for her.

  He used the hand behind her neck to tilt her head back and increase the intensity of the kiss. When he nibbled at her lower lip and then brushed his tongue over the spot, her knees buckled. He used his hold he had on her waist to keep her upright.

  Moving his mouth to her neck, he kissed and nibbled until she whimpered in need.

  “I need you inside me.”

  This wasn’t going to be a slow and tender lovemaking session; this was going to be a hot and fast fuck. “You don’t have to tell me twice.”

  While kissing her neck and nibbling on her ears, which he knew were hypersensitive, he lowered her pants and panties to find her slick with wetness. “You’re so wet for me. Do you know how fucking hot that is?” He moved his hand to her other hip and lifted her off the ground and positioned her on the edge of the counter.

  The minute his fingers found her wet heat, she released a desperate cry of relief. “Jarrod, please…, I need you inside me, now!”

  “Impatient, are we?” he said as he slipped out of his jeans and underwear. He was ready to blow. His erection was painfully hard and all he wanted to do was dive into her tight pussy and make them both come so hard the earth shook beneath them.

  “I don’t need slow right now, Jar. I need you to fuck me hard and fast.” He grabbed a condom from his discarded jeans, and the second he was covered, she lowered her hand to his cock, guiding him forward, and when she was inches away from being filled by him, Jarrod gave them what they both needed. He plunged into her with one thrust.

  “Fuck, you feel so damn good,” he said before putting his mouth on hers in a devastating kiss, as he started moving in and out of her with deep, hard thrusts. He knew he wouldn’t last long; she was so tight and wet. When he felt her muscles squeeze his dick, he knew she was close too. With his free hand, he rubbed her clit and her breathing became erratic.

  “I’m so close…. Don’t stop…. Faster please…right there. Oh, God.” She was so close to coming. Hell, he couldn’t take much more himself. He drove into her as deep as he could go, using his fingers to stimulate her clit, driving her over toward the edge faster.

  When she shut her eyes, he raised his open palm to cup her cheek, “Don’t close your eyes. Let me see you come. I want to watch as you cry out my name and feel you squeeze me dry. Come for me.”

  He knew that was all she needed. When her orgasm hit her, she dug her nails into his arms, and he kept fucking her like a mad man, his finger rubbing circles over her clit. “Jarrod.” His name out of her mouth was the sweetest sound he’d ever heard.

  “Fuck, I’m going to come.” He barely had time to say it before he exploded inside of her. Feeling her squeezing her inner muscles once, he groaned, “Shit, do that again,” and she did.

  Jarrod couldn’t believe the strength of his orgasm. It just kept going on, and when she squeezed his dick, he felt the surge of a second orgasm. Never in his life had he come twice so close together, but that was what she did to him. She drove him out of his mind.

  He didn’t know how long he stayed inside her, with his head on her shoulder. When he finally pulled out, she breathed a sigh of disappointment that almost made him ready for round two on the spot. Being with her made him feel like a horny teenager who couldn’t get enough, not that she seemed to mind.

  Trish looked so damn beautiful laid out on the kitchen counter like his favorite meal. Her lips were swollen from his kisses, and traces of his teeth on her neck and shoulders blades were visible. Her hair was tousled from his hands, and her pussy was swollen and slick.

  “Wow,” she said breathlessly, and yeah, maybe it made him sound like a caveman, but he loved knowing he was the one responsible for making her that way.

  “You can say that again,” he told her before taking off his sweat-dampened shirt. When he looked at her, she lowered her gaze from his. She was hiding something from him, and he hated it.

  “Don’t hide what you’re feeling from me,” he told her, taking her face in h
is hands, tracing her jawline with his thumbs.

  When he saw her biting her bottom lip followed by a light shake of her head, it hit him like a brick wall. “Tell me.” His words came out as a plea, a plea for her to put him out of his misery and tell him what he was desperate to hear.

  Patricia

  For a few minutes, neither of them said a word; they just looked into each other’s eyes, seeking comfort from each other. The connection they shared was stronger than anything Patricia had ever experienced in her life. It shouldn’t surprise her though, because everything about Jarrod was intense. She knew exactly what he wanted her to tell him because she could see the same thing in his eyes. But taking that step, saying those words out loud, would change everything in a heartbeat.

  His leaned in and rested his forehead on hers, not breaking eye contact. Sighing, he made his plea again. “Tell me.” This time, she couldn’t refuse him, because in that moment, nothing else mattered more to her than sharing this with him.

  Patricia let out a soft sigh of resignation. With her hands on his chest and her eyes lost in his, she took the biggest chance of her whole life. “I love you.” The words came out of her with raw honesty and passion, and every cell in her body told her this was the right thing to do.

  “Fuck, baby, I love you, too. I love you so fucking much.” He crushed his mouth on to hers. It was different than from any of their previous kisses.

  The intensity and strength of their connection made every inch of her body cling to him. He was demanding, taking everything she had to give like there was no tomorrow, and she was giving him all she had. His hands were in her hair, holding on to her like he might fall from floating too high.