Heart of the Music (Saints & Sinners #1)

by Kaithlin Shepherd

  “Yes, do you like it?” He couldn’t remember a time in the past five years when he had been so nervous, as he waited to hear what she thought about the space he’d created for her. He felt ready to pass out.

  Taking his hands in hers, she answered. “Like it? I love it! Why did you do this and when?” she asked him, the excitement in her voice easing some of the pressure in her chest.

  “The contractors have been working on the house for two weeks. I wanted to surprise you. There’s more. I had work done on the closet in the master bedroom to make it bigger, and they worked on the outdoor patio.” This was one of the most important decisions he had ever made. He had dug deep in his memories to remember what she had told him in the past about what she would have done in his house if it was hers.

  “Jarrod, why did you do all of this?”

  With his hands in her hair, he kissed her, swallowing her little moans before pulling back and looking her straight in the eyes. “Because I want you to feel like this is your home, baby.”

  “Are you asking me to move in with you?” she asked, awe and surprise registering across her features.

  “I am. What do you say?”

  Patricia

  When she saw the hope flash in his eyes, she knew she was right where she wanted to be. “You did all of this for me? Oh, baby, you didn’t have to do that. I would have said yes without all of the changes.”

  “I want you to have everything, Trish. Everything I have, it’s yours.” He wrapped his hands around her waist, spun her around, and pulled her into him, her back to his chest, as they looked outside. “I love you, baby.”

  “I love you so much, Jarrod.” She took his hands and lifted them up to her lips, kissing his knuckles as she leaned into his body. When she caught their reflection in the mirror and noticed how sexy they looked, she lowered his hands to her breasts. “I want you to fuck me up against the windows.” Her heart beating wildly, jolts of pleasure rocked through her in anticipation.

  “You know you’re getting to be quite the sex addict, Miss Monroe,” he whispered against her ear.

  “You’ve corrupted me,” she told him, biting his forearm. He moved them forward, put her palms against the window, and squeezed her breasts at the same time as he kicked her legs apart.

  “Do you want it hard and fast or slow and dirty, baby?” He pulled down his jeans, waiting for her to answer him.

  “Hard and fast.” When his fingers slipped under her skirt and pushed her panties to the side to rub her clit, she moaned his name as she shivered around the sensation of his hands on her. Then he gave her exactly what they both needed.

  Having a week off was fantastic, but spending three of those days in bed sick was not.

  “Baby, I’m taking you to the hospital. This is getting out of control. You’ve been throwing up for three days straight, you’ve barely eaten anything, and you’re pale as hell.”

  “All right,” she conceded. “I don’t know how much more of this I can take.” She put her hair up in a bun on the top of her head, wishing she was strong enough to take a shower, but that wasn’t happening.

  With one arm, Jarrod held her sitting upright while helping her change into a clean tee. He laid her back down on the bed and helped her into a clean pair of underwear and sweatpants.

  “I’m carrying you to the car, baby.” He slipped one arm under her knees and wrapped the other around her waist.

  After carrying her to the car, he helped her settled in, making sure she had a plastic bag with her in case the nausea came back. He took the time to message the guys and let them what was going on before he broke speed limits driving her to the hospital, but he didn’t seem to care when she mentioned it. Jarrod carried her inside the hospital and headed straight for the triage nurse, who took one look at Patricia and rushed them to a private room.

  “How long has she been like this?”

  “She’s been throwing up for the past three days. I thought it was the flu or something, but she’s so weak and she’s not eating much.”

  “All right, we’ll run some bloodwork and hook her on up to an IV to get her rehydrated.” The nurse tucked Patricia into a bed before taking some blood and assured her, “Honey, we’re going to take good care of you. The doctor should be in soon.”

  When she left the room, Jarrod climbed into bed with her, cradling her against him. “I’ve got you, baby.”

  “I’m scared,” she admitted as her whole body shook against his warmth.

  “Whatever it is, baby, we’ll handle it together.” As he tucked her closer against him, she closed her eyes and let sleep take over.

  They were both sound asleep when the doctor came in a few hours later, and woke them up. “I’m Dr. Reynolds. How are you feeling, Patricia?”

  “A little better actually. I don’t feel like throwing up, so that’s an improvement,” she replied, trying to make the situation a little lighter. She knew Jarrod was having a hard time seeing her like this, and not being able to do anything about it.

  “We administered some anti-nausea medicine and some fluids to keep you hydrated. I have the results from the blood work we ordered when you came in. You’re pregnant, Patricia.”

  She felt like she was in a movie where the world stopped turning. How could this happen? They had been careful about using protection. Oh, God, she had no idea how Jarrod was going to react to something like this.

  “I’m sorry, what did you just say?” Jarrod asked the doctor. She squeezed his hand, trying to reassure him.

  Jarrod

  “She's pregnant. I’d like to carry out a sonogram to check on the baby’s vitals, and we’ll be keeping you overnight to rehydrate you. I’ll be back later to check up on you.”

  Jarrod watched the doctor leave the room, still in shock about the news they had just received. Trish was pregnant. He was going to be a dad.

  He should be panicked about the news, but he wasn’t. He glanced over at her and said the words, making it all more real. “We’re going to have a baby. You’re carrying my baby.”

  “I know this wasn’t planned, Jar, and it’s a lot to handle—” He interrupted by caressing her lips with his, holding her body close against his chest.

  He placed his hand on her stomach, settling his forehead on hers. “Baby, this is one of the best moments of my life. The woman I love more than anything in this world is carrying my child. I’m so fucking happy right now.”

  In the best moment of his life, he saw a flash of fear slide across Patricia’s face, and for a brief second, he worried maybe she wasn’t ready for this.

  “Oh, God, Jarrod, what are we going to do? Oh, God, there’s a world tour starting, and I’m pregnant and you’re going to be gone. I don’t know anything about being a mother. What if I’m not cut out for this?”

  He had to laugh at how ridiculous her concerns were. He had no doubt in his mind that she was going to be a great mother, and the fact that she was worried about the band right then, just made him laugh harder. He knew the guys would be more than thrilled about this.

  “Baby, take a deep breath. You are going to be a great mother, are you kidding me? This child is going to have the most loving mother in the world. We’ll travel as long as we can, but when this baby is ready to come into our lives, I am telling you this right now, I’m not leaving you. I’m going to stay right here with you until we can travel as a family. The guys are all going to support me on this. We’ll find a way to make it work.” He kissed her hair just as the door opened and the four guys who were like brothers to him walked into the room.

  “Support you on what?” Jarrod glanced at the door to where Sam, Austin, Mike, and Tyler stood, looking confused and scared as hell at the sight of Trish in a hospital bed.

  “Are you okay, Trish?” Mike asked her, scanning her body, checking to see if there were any visible injuries. To think about how far Mike and Patricia had come in their relationship blew Jarrod’s mind sometimes. The man had gone from making her life miserable to
being there for her in a heartbeat, and he knew Mike would be there for them now.

  “I’m fine, Mike. I’m not injured. I’m… I mean, we’re having a baby. I’m pregnant.”

  The shouts of joy and congratulations coming from their room were loud enough to wake the dead, but when Sam gazed Patricia’s way, he coughed to get their attention, and the room went silent.

  “We’re missing something here. What were you guys talking about before we came barging in?” Sam asked.

  As the tears slid down her cheeks, Jarrod held her tighter against his body.

  “When the day comes that Trish can’t travel with us anymore, I’m going to be staying put with her, and when the baby is born, I’m not leaving my family to go out on the road until they’re ready to come with us. We’ll get our own bus, but I will not leave my family.”

  “We wouldn’t ask you to, man. Is that why you’re upset, Trish? Because you think we would leave you alone to raise this child? No fucking way. The minute you can’t travel with us, we’ll find a way to make it work. We can postpone the tour. We can do whatever we need to do. We’re not going back out on the road until every single one of us is ready.” Sam spoke the exact words Jarrod and Trish needed to hear in that moment.

  As they nodded in agreement, the nurse came in asking them to step out so she could assist Trish in freshening up. Jarrod kissed her before leaving the room, making sure she didn’t need anything.

  Sitting in the hospital cafeteria, Jarrod still couldn’t believe it was true. “I’m going to be a dad. How crazy is that?”

  “You guys do have five years of catching up to do, man.” Sam nudged him.

  “I think it’s about damn time,” Mike confessed, rubbing his face.

  “It’s the best fucking feeling in the world, Mike. I mean, she has my baby inside her. You can’t even imagine what that knowledge feels like. It’s like a high or something.” That was the best way he could describe what he was feeling right then. Nothing compared to the high that came with finding out he was going to be a parent, not even the high from 20,000 screaming fans.

  The next couple of days flew by. Patricia had gotten discharged from the hospital the day after finding out about the baby, and he was pretty sure he was driving everyone insane. He bought every pregnancy book available to man and drilled the doctor with more questions than he probably should have, but he didn’t care. He was going to be the best dad possible, and nothing was going to stop him from making sure he got everything right.

  They were on their way to his mom’s place to tell her the news, because he had refused to tell her over the phone. He couldn’t wait to see the look on his mom’s face when they told her she was going to be a grandmother. He wished his dad was still alive to see this.

  “Do you think she knows?” Patricia asked him while sitting in the passenger seat of his truck. He was going to have to look into changing his car because there was no way his truck would be safe enough for their baby. Damn, he really needed to get a handle on his shit before it got out of control.

  “I don’t know. She might though since we’ve been so secretive about why you ended up in the hospital.”

  “I can’t wait to tell her.” She was probably more excited about telling his mom than he was. He just smiled and took her hand in his as they pulled up to his mom’s house. As usual, his mom was outside working in her garden, something she had started enjoying doing after Jarrod’s dad passed away. They should probably start doing something like that, right? When his mom heard the truck, she wiped her hands on her jeans, and started walking toward them.

  “Jarrod, you need to calm down. I can almost hear your brain racing right now.”

  He turned off the truck and looked at her. “I just want to make sure we’re ready and we do this right.”

  “We’re going to make mistakes, babe. There’s no manual on how to be a parent, but we’re going to learn together.” He lowered his head to kiss her stomach before kissing her lips.

  He helped her out of the truck, and when they reached the front porch, his mom looked between the two of them and he could tell she was worried about the woman who was carrying his child.

  “Are you okay, sweetheart? What happened?” his mom asked her as she hugged them.

  “I’m fine, Christine. He took really good care of me when I was sick.” Patricia tucked herself under his arm, and he held her tight as his mom watched them, no doubt trying to figure out what was going on.

  “We have something to tell you, Mom. You’re going to be a grandma.”

  He smiled when his mom’s face changed from concern to shock. “What?”

  “We’re pregnant, Mom.” He placed a hand on Patricia’s stomach, and with his other hand, he wiped the happy tears from Trish’s face.

  His mom pulled Patricia away from his embrace to hug her, and when she looked at him, her eyes shined with happiness. “Oh, dear Lord, this is the greatest news. You two are going to be wonderful parents.”

  Yes, they were. He knew they would both do anything in their power to make sure their child was loved unconditionally.

  Patricia

  Being pregnant was definitely life-changing for her, and the last couple of months had been challenging, to say the least. The excitement of carrying a child, of carrying a life, had been so overwhelming that she didn’t think she could ever be happier. After moving in with Jarrod, they had spent their time learning about what being a parent meant. Jarrod had been beyond amazing. Every baby book in the world was spread out on their kitchen table and every baby website was bookmarked in their web browser. As much as she had pictured raising a family in her house, she had to admit that with all the changes they were making to Jarrod’s house, this was the perfect place for them.

  The one thing she could do without was the morning sickness—although, she really didn’t know why they called the damn thing morning sickness when it lasted all day. She had decided to travel a little less because the exhaustion just wasn’t worth it. Now, as she watched Jarrod pack for his business trip to L.A., she was reconsidering her decision. She hated being away from him, but she knew he just couldn’t give up on everything. She knew he didn’t want to leave, but this trip to L.A. had been on the books for months, and it was one of those trips that couldn’t be blown off.

  “I hate leaving you like this, baby, but I have to go to this meeting.” He had tried to cancel, but the label wasn’t having it, and she understood better than anyone the pressure he and the rest of the band were under to get this new album together.

  “It’s okay, Jarrod. You’ll only be gone for a day. I think we can handle being by ourselves for twenty-four hours. This meeting is important. This new endorsement is a good deal.” She hated that he had to leave, but he would be back before she knew it. That was what she kept telling herself.

  “Are you sure you’re going to be okay? My mom can stay with you while I’m gone.” Jarrod had put everyone on high alert—from his mom, his sister, their new publicist, the band, and the other band members’ parents. He was taking no chances; if she needed someone while he was gone, he was making damn sure someone would be there in the flash of an eye to take care of her.

  “Baby, I’m pregnant, not dying. We are going to be just fine,” she told him, rubbing her belly.

  He kissed her softly. “Okay, but if you need me for any reason at all, I’ll be on the first flight out.”

  “I know, baby. Now go before you miss your flight.” She ran her hands under his shirt, loving the feel of his bare skin. Pregnancy had made her extra hormonal horny, and she had been like a sex machine, for the past few months, not that Jarrod ever complained.

  “I love you,” he kissed her and then he kissed her belly, “and I love you, baby girl.”

  “It could be a boy, you know,” she told him laughing, “and we love you. Now go.”

  Chapter Twelve

  1 year ago

  Jarrod

  He was deep in the middle of a dream when his phone
started ringing and took him out of Trish’s bed in his mind and put back in his own bedroom. He grabbed his phone from the bedside table, swearing at whoever was calling him this early on his day off.

  “Yeah?” He rolled to the side of the bed to look at the clock. Who the hell was calling him at 2 a.m.?

  “I’m looking for Mr. Jarrod Banks.”

  He shook his head, trying to get rid of the fog in his brain. He didn’t recognize the man’s voice, but obviously he had some sort of connection to him if he had his number.

  “Speaking.”

  “Mr. Banks, my name is Dr. Smith. I’m calling from Saint Thomas Hospital. We have you as an emergency contact for Patricia Monroe.” At the mention of the words hospital and Trish, he jerked upright in his bed, alert and awake.

  “What happened?” He picked up his jeans from the floor, grabbed a clean T-shirt, and headed for the garage.

  “She was in a car accident and was brought in about an hour ago. She was unconscious when she arrived. She’s stable now, but we’ll be keeping her for a few days. She has a broken leg and a few bruised ribs. She’ll need to take it easy for a few weeks.”

  “I’ll be there in ten minutes.” He didn’t even let the man say anything else. He ended the call, snatched his keys off the table, and climbed into his car.

  Jarrod made it to the hospital in record time, surprised he hadn’t gotten a speeding ticket. After waiting around for someone to finally give him Patricia’s room number, he took a few minutes to get himself under control. The last thing he wanted to do was walk into her room with his emotions all over the place.

  When he entered the room and saw her bruised and asleep on the hospital bed, he felt his heart break. He pulled up a chair beside her bed and took her hand in his. Eyes never leaving her face, he needed the reassurance she was okay. The doctor came into the room and gave him as much information as he was legally allowed to give. Jarrod texted the guys to let them know what was happening before texting their booking agent to reschedule their shows for the next few days.