Gangsters In Time [Part III] Veni, Vidi, Vici

by Stanimir Mirov

  The eldest brother understood nothing but drank the wine in a single gulp.

  “No more demonstrations. I believe you! If you convince me more, I’ll remain without an army!”

  Dead horse. Ten minutes earlier.

  Galloping with the ultimate strength of his horse, with an arrow stuck in his ass, the messenger slipped from the saddle, and you know what happened after ten minutes.

  The Khan had been watching like mad for quite some time. The envoy gathered his last strength, and with an inhuman cry and tears pulled the arrow from his buttocks. He looked around, and after realizing that he was in the wrong city and there were no Japanese around, he comited seppuku in front of everyone.

  After a while, the scouts of the ruler brought him bad news, “Great Khan, we bring news from Asia. Disobedience, rebellion, and invasion. Large forces rise against thee in the West.”

  “Who dares?” Asked the eldest son of Attila.

  “Oh, Suvigi Khan,” the soldier coughed slightly and started to list, “Akatiri, Saraguri, Persians, Armenians, Massagethes, Alans, Gepids, Langobards, Burgundians, Franks, Vandals, Ostrogoths, Visigoths, Romans, Slavs, Hindus, Chinese, Japanese, Choson, some nomads, and various other tribes.”

  “Send news to the Bulgarians to slaughter them in Asia. All loot is for them. And I’ll take care of the West...”

  The messenger bowed and left. The next day, thirty thousand troops headed for Rome.

  Chapter III

  The year was 453. The Roman emperor Valentinian III received notice that the armies of the Huns come from the east and seek revenge. Although the capital was moved from Ravenna back to Rome, the emperor could not wait for the providence. Seeing the danger hanging over the empire, the Valentinian with Roman devious political maneuvering managed to squeeze the wealthy Romans enough to pay for a large mercenary troops. His personal army comprised seven legions composed almost entirely of German warriors, mainly Franks and Goths, trained in the empire. The Roman army consisted mostly of barbarians. With the price of a lot of gold, he managed to attract Burgundians, Gepids, Ostrogoths and even a little ironic, Vandals, to his side. Its aim was to completely crush the Huns and take Pannonia and the rest of the territory bordering with the Eastern Roman Empire. He intended to meet them north of Ravenna...

  * * *

  The great vast plain was covered in forests and hills. On one was the emperor with his personal guards and entourage. Down on the plain, the Roman legions were taking positions in regular combat formations deployed in a large width. This well-trained and disciplined army showed the last notes of the power of the Empire. Behind them were lined catapults and ballistae. About 500 archers stood before the legions. Cavalry of 200 riders waited lurking on the left flank.

  In front of all this army were the mercenaries. There, the painting was cruel and dreadful. Divided into various clans and tribes, they represented the cruelty of the wild warrior, ready for a fee to eat the warm heart of the opponent. There were all kinds of weapons and armor mainly made of leather. Some shaven, others with tousled heads, thirds with braids, according to their customs, but all with big beards. Vandals' faces were smeared with animal blood. Their armament consisted mainly of swords, maces, and large knives. Their chieftain consisted of massive and agile men who looked like demons. Throaty shouts and movements filled the valleys with an incredible fearsome roar. Different types of drums and other musical instruments sounded in the ghostly reality.

  Both armies had been lined up in battle formation for four days in a row but did not dare to attack because of their strategic positions. On the fifth, however, arrived the last reinforcements of the Valentinian. The sun rose, and the armies regrouped again.

  Dengizich, the largest among the sons of Attila, was looking once more "the show", but knew from his scouts about the reinforcements and that the time had come. Even before the first day, it was discussed how to act under Ernak’s initiative and commands were given. Hun commanders were waiting ready to fulfill the orders. The army of The Khan spread width as a crescent on several hills. The two wings were composed of five thousand light horsemen each, armed with bows and swords. In the center were twenty thousand infantry. The core, however, was represented by a thousand Bulgarians heavily armed with spears, swords, and shields, ready to stop the strongest momentum of the enemy.

  First sounded the Roman trumpets and all the legions took their positions. The mercenaries also moved. Between the lines, before all this riffraff and the army went 2-3 meter tall giant half-dressed in bearskin, whose teeth hang over his forehead in order to frighten his enemies, rather than anything else. Suddenly became deadly silence. The beast that was brought to him, a huge male specimen was a rare giant bear shackled with chains. Eyes of the brown animal and the chief met. The bear stood on its hindpaws and let out a terrible roar, catching the attention even of the most cold-blooded killer. The chieftain bounced left after her stroke and with incredible speed stuck his enormous sword into her chest. Quickly pulled out his weapon and only after he cut off the head off the beast, the bear collapsed. The giant reached with his hand and took the beating heart. The chief bit it with malice and blood spurted all over his face and body. After he ate it, looked to the sky, and let out a roar that chilled the blood of the whole army. Nearly fifteen thousand relentless as savage warriors followed the cry of the chief and started to hit their shields with weapons. The earth shook from the thunder. A large flock of birds rose above the trees and flew away. No one had seen such barbarism for centuries. Romanization had abolished most of these traits of the tribes, but apparently, there were still followers of old ways.

  The leader of the Huns, who watched it all across with his hordes continued to chew dried horse meat with indifference, typical for Bulgarian shaman in a trance in the afternoon. He spun his horse against the army and saw fear in the eyes in some of his warriors. The Khan whispered something in the ear of his favorite horse, and the animal fiddled nervously and started to neigh. The stallion stood up on its hind legs to attract the attention of the troops, and The Khan shouted in a hoarse voice, “Warriors of Attila, Khan of Khans and chief of chiefs!” Commanders in distant places were repeating his words so everybody could hear them. “Dozens of times we faced more numerous enemy. Today, it’s an enemy which is trying to show that it is more ferocious than you! There is no greater Empire than ours!” Dengizich heated, and his eyes turned red from the crying. The army became agitated and started the move. “And when down there in the plane swords start breaking, shields collapse and you decrepit from fatigue can see that the end is near, remember how the Roman rabble infamously poisoned your great Khan and father, Attila. And when the blood rises again in your veins, let them see what’s ferocity. KILL THEM ALL!” Enraged in turn The Khan held up the sword of his father.

  After his signal had sounded horns, drums, bagpipes were inflated, and there was a bloodthirsty howl that went like a Mexican wave in the long rows without subsiding. The death meant nothing anymore for these people. Just mentioning the name of Attila was enough to get them to kill every enemy. Twenty thousand soldiers shoved with swords on their shields and the Romans knew that their enemy was as big and hard. It was going to be a deadly battle.

  The gangsters watched this frightening picture from the first row.

  “I’ll hardly ever see a historical movie again!” Leo looked like he has being shot.

  “Aha,” Galfonino agreed without even watching him.

  In the distance was heard the command, “Vata Binu Hun!”

  Hordes of mercenaries with a slow and steady pace moved towards the Huns. The army stopped at two throws of an arrow.

  “Now what are they up to?” Macony asked.

  Germanic tribes regrouped. In front in four long lines soldiers stood with shields, swords, and spears. The other half behind them split into two and passing both flanks entered the forest. Ernak had anticipated such a move upon arrival. In the woods were made traps, dug holes, driven stakes... Two thousand selec
ted warriors in each forest kept the back of the Huns and were ready to push the enemy and turn it into rout.

  The Khan waved and from the left-wing, three thousand horsemen raced headlong into the savages. Mercenaries pointed spears, strung bows and waited. The Hun cavalry stretched lengthwise and galloped. Towards the people of the Bear hissed thousands of arrows. The wounded were not many, but the clash was great. The cavalry slammed into the enemy lines with force. The Man-bear turned and broke the backbone of the galloping horse in one fell swoop and its rider flew into the crowd. Began a bloody carnage. Whinnied injured and dying horses. Dying cries from the crowd mingled with universal noise. The Huns were furiously chopping heads, but their momentum was stopped. Very soon, the horsemen became weary as the hoop around them was tightening. Luring in pursuit, the tribes increasingly got further away from the Roman army.

  Suddenly, the mercenary troops who broke away earlier today left the confines of the forest and completely surrounded the cavalry. At the same time, under the sign of The Khan, another horde of ten thousand people broke away from the center toward the enemy. All escape route was impossible.

  Two legions departed to help the bear, who was still roaring fiercely, killing horses and Huns. Aid was welcomed, as another three thousand horsemen galloped from Dengizich’s right wing. Romans joined the battle, and The Khan, sensing their chance, signaled the troops in the forests to get ahead and bypass the fight.

  Valentinian spies reported the enemy plans. Catapults started to work and bring turmoil to the forces in the woods.

  But the Huns were many and quickly recovered. The fallen one regrouped and continued the fight on foot. The slaughter was great and cruel. No leader stood out, however.

  Sounded Roman pipes, and the rest of the legions started to walk towards the battle. The fight took on a new dimension. The Huns, who fought with the blood-thirsty mercenaries, already weary and under the significant number of the enemy, slowly began to retreat. The great horde was about to be broken as never before. Retreat, however, wasn’t an option. The Khan, seeing the development of the battle, sent his personal guard to call Ernak along with his closest men, who fought on the left wing led by the gangster himself. He came and bowed.

  “Ernak, my brother, the battle comes to an end, and with it comes the end of the Huns. We have nothing to do but to gather the remnants of the Horde and with one last rush perpetuate the name of the great Khan Attila. The greatest among Huns and Romans,” here Dengizich shook his head at his advisor and the battle horns sounded.

  The Hun army slowly began to pull back under the pressure of the joined legions. But the Romans suddenly stopped to regroup because fresh troops that had not yet entered the battle were waiting on the hill. The rested Bulgarian Guard was arousing fear. For fear of a trap, the new formation that the legions took was hard to break. No chance for people from that time.

  The silence was distracted by the cries from hundreds of meters in front of them, where the Germanic tribes and retreating Huns were still fiercely killing each other. The battle was being led by the middle brother, who in every twenty minutes sends people to ask for reinforcements, but such didn’t come. However, when pulled at a safe distance from the Romans, the whole horde raced headlong to help Elak.

  The look of the bear froze. Towards him was coming large force to help the Huns. In his head passed a bunch of violent thoughts, which would envy even Stalin. He made a pile of corpses, climbed above and with legs apart raised his hands and bellowed, “GULLU, MORATE, ZUMPARA, UICHACHA!”

  Assembled before the pile of bodies his tribesmen having banished the surviving Huns at a narrow distance,answeredthroatilyto the Bear, “Ti taelliw ew!”

  The chieftain replied to the call, “Su deyarteb snamor eht. Kcid ym kcus!”

  “Srou uoy dna!” excited shouted his warriors.

  The bear scratched its ass, pointed at the incoming horsemen and roared again, “Oot srieht tae lliw ew, gnimoc era sedroh eht!”

  The chief of the tribes had already seen that end is near, he decided on one last move before his death overtakes him. He threw most of his fur and remained almost naked. Pulled a knife from one of the corpses beneath him and cut off a head. The giant began to smear all over with his body, mixing bear and human blood. Apparently, attracting the attention of everyone again, the chieftain picked up two swords and roared with his remaining strength so that everyone can hear him. Then he descended from the pile accelerating towards the regrouped Huns.

  Several arrows flew past the face of the fierce man, and one hit him in the head. But it could not stop him, for the adrenaline in his body was in surplus by a few buckets and that kept him alive. With terrible force, the bear tore into the horde alone, cutting everything and making his way to the brother of The Khan. Seconds later, his army reached the enemy too, inspired by their leader, killing Huns as no one had before them. Soon his tribes overtook him, and Huns still continued to fall. Elak sent his two best warriors to kill the nonhuman leading this latest attack. An attack prompted by despair, reaching a scale of massacre of his people.

  Both riders have to accelerate rapidly to the chief, but cautiously in order to surprise him. The moment of truth came, and a sword pierced the bear in the back. Demonic sounds were heard at the hill. The chieftain turned to the attackers and with the last of his strength smashed their heads with his hands. Then he knelt and pulled out the sword from his back. The demon fell to his knees, slowly looked up the sky, said something and smiling fell on his face. It took nearly an hour to finish the tribes. The Roman legions were still waiting calmly on the plane.

  “Ernak, I saw your people with what malice were killing our enemy. Probably they love you much for that is worthy of the greatest warriors. But if they do that thing that caused the death of my best men, I will personally give them one town and bathe them in gold!”

  The chief approached his leader and took his hand, “Big Brother, do not worry. Just be ready…”

  The Khan didn’t need more than that. He hugged his brother, got back on the horse, drew his sword and went in front of the lines.

  Leo waved to his personal assistant and the servant drove the cart.

  “Ernak, you should know that we are low on munition,” spoke Capone. “There is a bag with Kalashnikov cartridges, several grenades, our personal weapons, and Leo took his sniper rifle.”

  The chief thought for a moment and an idea struck him, “Give me one AK-47, and Leo will shoot down the entourage of the Emperor up on the hill, then the Roman leaders. This will bring great confusion. In the meantime, we will open fire, and when panic falls upon the enemy, my brother will slay them in the back.”

  All the gangsters armed themselves, hugged each other, and Mac added, “God before us and we behind him!”

  “Since when did you become so religious?

  “Since I met you!” laughed Macony followed by the rest.

  While they were discussing the plan, a nondescript, staggering, stumbling limping figure belonging to the drunken Arnold, attracted their attention by firing at the enemy. After another burst of Kalashnikovs, from the recoil, Arnie finally lost his balance, and he fell on his back continuing to shoot. The battle for him was over because he fell asleep.

  The consequences of his shooting had created confusion in the troops. By any chance, he had hit several Romans. Some of the hits made them groan wounded, and one with a gaping hole in his skull attracted attention. The other soldiers began to examine, searching for an arrow or another object that might have killed him. There were witnesses to the shooting who were discussing what kind of magic was that. The rumor spread through the legions and brought confusion among the warriors.

  At this point, Leo calmly took aim with an optical sight at the man who stood closest to the Emperor.

  Ten seconds before the shot, at some distance behind the ruler, well-disguised Japanese was preparing a deadly arrow designed for Valentinian.

  The horse of the Roman taken on target in front whinn
ied nervously. The owner leaned over his ear to reassure him with endearments.

  At this moment, the bullet left the barrel, passed over the head of the Emperor assistant and the Japanese fell bathed in blood trickling from his skull.

  The Sock took aim again and this time did not miss.

  Against the Roman legions stood Ernak, Macony, and Capone. The Italian lit a cigarette, “For those unaware, the sun rises from the east!” Galfonino reloaded, and the shooting began.

  The field was covered with corpses. Their shields could not stop the bullets of Kalashnikov. From the hill were coming rumors of the death. The great rumble submitted fear in the souls of the soldiers. The Romans threw away their weapons and fled in an unknown direction.

  Part of the horde headed after them.

  The loss of the entourage of the Emperor was unforeseen. He had made a flawless scheme, like the Bulgarian Socialist Party before elections. But, alas...

  * * *

  An hour later, the battle was over. The Great Horde was only reduced by half, but the enemy was completely broken.

  Very little part of the Romans managed to escape, but enough to prevent The Khan from attacking Rome. And ours decided that it would change history too much if this happened. They have kept their promise to Ernak.

  Rome was forced to pay tribute to the great Khan. The Horde returned east to fix its problems with some other tribes.

  Naturally, the historical scene somehow found a way to remain unchanged, and even the battle was hushed up by the sources to cover the shame of the Romans. Perhaps the survivors weren’t that much.

  Before the gangsters went home, Galfonino had the "brilliant" idea to teleport the machine into the basement of the "safe house" as he liked to call the house at the beach, for which only they knew. Capone wanted to study it more carefully. And it was more convenient regarding teleportation. The gangsters made an agreement with Ernak. If, at some point in his life, he needs their help, he should write it in ancient Bulgarian runic language on some rock, so the time will preserve it. That way ours will know and teleport back.