Who Moved My Blackberry?
Page 1
Who Moved
My Blackberry™?
Lucy Kellaway
with
Martin Lukes
To my dearest mum,
my #1 fan
Table of Contents
Cover
Title Page
Prologue: DECEMBER
1 JANUARY: Myself—The Basics
2 FEBRUARY: My DNA
3 MARCH: My Dream
4 APRIL: My Negative Energy
5 MAY: My Heart and My Head
6 JUNE: My Body
7 JULY: My Funeral
8 AUGUST: My Work/Life Balance
9 SEPTEMBER: My Development Opportunities
10 OCTOBER: My Money
11 NOVEMBER: My Relationships
12 DECEMBER: Welcome Home
Authors’ Acknowledgments
Pandora’s Acknowledgments
About the Author
Praise for WHO MOVED MY BLACKBERRY?
Copyright
Prologue
DECEMBER
DECEMBER 4
From: Martin Lukes
To: Sylvia Woods
Hi Sylvia
What’s this message to call Sebastian Fforbes Hever? Did he say what it was about? I’m going out now for a spot of lunch. If he calls back, I’ve got my mobile, pager and BlackBerry with me.
Martin
From: Martin Lukes
To: Jenny Lukes
Darling—
Sorry about last night … had a few too many. Will try to get back early tonite to make amends.
btw one of the top headhunters at Heidrick Ferry has been trying to get hold of me(!) … dunno what it’s about.
Love you, M xx
From: Martin Lukes
To: SebastianFforbesHever@HeidrickFerry
Hi Sebastian
Thanks for your most intriguing e-mail. Yes, indeed, I could find a window to meet up with you tomorrow. I’ll have to juggle a couple of meetings, but should be doable—could see you at your offices in Buckingham Palace Road at around 3ish.
Bestest
Martin Lukes
Marketing Director, A&B (UK)
From: Martin Lukes
To: Jenny Lukes
Darling—
Guess what?? I’ve been approached to be director of marketing and strategy at a major retailer!! All very hush hush … the headhunter wouldn’t say which one over the phone, but I’m going to meet him tomorrow.
I know you’re really up against it this pm but wld be v grateful if you’d pick up my gray Hugo Boss suit from the cleaners.
Love you M xx
DECEMBER 6
From: Martin Lukes
To: Sylvia Woods
Hi Sylvia, I’m popping out now. If anyone wants to know where I am, say I’m at a forward planning meeting with Tim at Boogie Gargle Fink.
Will be back 5ish.
Martin
From: Martin Lukes
To: Jenny Lukes
Darling—FANTASTIC meeting with Sebastian just now. The job is marketing director of Sainsburys!! The role’s heaven made for yours truly—I’d be in charge of 350 people globally, $1bn annual budget. Very high profile.
Sebastian didn’t mention the package at this stage, but said it wouldn’t be an obstacle to finding the right person. I assume at least twice what I’m on now … It’s got my name all over it—what they want are unrivaled communications skills, out of the box thinking, results driven mentality and an outstanding track record in driving performance … I’ve got ticks in all the boxes. Coming straight home now.
Love you M xx
Sent from my BlackBerry Wireless Handheld
DECEMBER 7
From: Martin Lukes
To: Sebastian Fforbes Hever
Hi Sebastian
Great to meet with you yesterday—I felt we were very much singing from the same hymn sheet. I just wanted to reiterate how positive I am about this position, and how much I have to bring to the party.
Just to recap: I’m very can-do, very get-up-go—I operate very well within a large company—but have a pronounced entrepreneurial streak that keeps me thinking outside the box.
Look forward to hearing from you.
All my very bestest
Martin
From: Martin Lukes
To: Jenny Lukes
Darling—
I’m on the short list!!! I’m going to meet all the top bods at Sainsburys on Monday. I’ve got to prepare a presentation on how I would transition the marketing strategy onto a higher plane. Should be no problem, though I’m a bit out of the loop on food shopping—you’ve deskilled me on that one. As a shopper, have you got any pointers on supermarkets—from the consumer’s perspective? Debrief tonite?
Love you, M xx
PS I’ll be working flat out all weekend … so don’t think I’ll be able to make it to yr parents on Sunday.
From: Martin Lukes
To: Jenny Lukes
Darling—don’t think you understand this is the biggest inflexion point in my career to date. I’m sure your parents won’t mind—they don’t like me anyway …
DECEMBER 12
From: Martin Lukes
To: Jenny Lukes
Darling—total triumph!! The chief executive of Sainsburys has the IDENTICAL take on the future of marketing to yours truly. I gave them my spiel on how we have gone beyond traditional marketing into a new age of synchronicity across functionalities. The interview was meant to last an hour, but I got the feeling they had made up their mind after 15 minutes, and after that it was more like a relaxed friendly chat than your bog-standard interview.
My presentation on their marketing strategy was 110 percent on the button. I decided not to pull my punches, and I was pretty critical—though obviously in a very positive sort of way. Basically I said that in the past they’ve relied too heavily on Jamie Oliver—they need to have a more flexible approach to winning hearts and minds of today’s shoppers.
See you later
M xx
From: Martin Lukes
To: Sebastian Fforbes Hever
Hi Sebastian
Just wanted to touch base to find out how you think that went? Have you had any feedback from your client? From my point of view it was very positive indeed …
Bestest
Martin
From: Martin Lukes
To: Jenny Lukes
Darling—Just had a brief chat with Sebastian—and he says they are “very interested” in me. Re package, we’re talking of something in the region of 350k, plus bonus which could be same again. Obviously share options, pension, health insurance, gym club membership. Car allowance would be double so that we could trade in the Mitsubishi Shogun and get a Porsche Cayenne V8 Turbo S.
We could also think of moving. I could see us in one of those 8-bed detached jobs on the common itself—near where George and Stacey live. I just called the estate agent, and there’s one on the market for 3.2mil, which would be do-able.
Love you M xx
From: Martin Lukes
To: Jenny Lukes
Darling—Yes, I know I shouldn’t count my chickens. And I’m not. I’m simply repeating what I’ve been told. In any case in this market milieu if you don’t have a positive headset you don’t get anywhere.
M
DECEMBER 13
From: Martin Lukes
To: Graham Wallace
Hi Graham
Did you notice that I wasn’t firing on all cylinders in the board meeting just now? Between you and me and the gatepost, that could be the last one I’m ever going to attend. I’m up for a big job. It’s as good as in the bag, though can’t tell you what at this juncture. But put it this way. Think superma
rket. Think Jamie Oliver. Think Chief Marketing Officer …
Mart
From: Martin Lukes
To: Graham Wallace
Cheers, Graham. Yes obviously I am totally over the moon. I had started feeling very stuck here—but I suppose I’ve been in denial about it. At the end of the day, being marketing director has been a load of fun, but I’ve outgrown it.
Mart
PS Keep this under your hat till it’s greenlighted. Then monster drinks in order.
From: Martin Lukes
To: Sylvia Woods
Hi Sylvia
I think I should let you into a little secret. I’m afraid our ways are about to part. I’ve been headhunted for a very senior job, so looks like this might be my last week here. If anyone from Sainsbury or Heidrick Struggles calls in the next hour when I’m in the budget meeting come and get me out.
M
From: Martin Lukes
To: Sylvia Woods
Anyone called?
DECEMBER 14
From: Martin Lukes
To: Sebastian Fforbes Hever
Hi Sebastian
I don’t want to hassle you, but I just wondered if there was any news?
Bestest, Martin
From: Martin Lukes
To: Sebastian Fforbes Hever
I don’t understand. That wasn’t what you implied earlier. I thought the Sainsburys board loved me. Is this a joke, or what?
From: Martin Lukes
To: Jenny Lukes
I don’t fucking believe it. They’ve gone and fucking given it to someone fucking else. Sebastian is a fucking lying sod. He said they LOVED my presentation—practically said the job was in the bag. And now he’s saying I didn’t have the right skillsets, fit not quite right, better qualified candidates … blah blah. I think the guy who got it is head of marketing at Tesco or Asda, so I suppose that means the idiots have gone for the safe candidate rather than the best candidate. I still just can’t fucking believe it. It’s so unfair. My dream job.
M
From: Martin Lukes
To: Sylvia Woods
Sylvia I’m feeling very unwell. I think I’m coming down with the flu. I’m going home now.
DECEMBER 15
From: Martin Lukes
To: Graham Wallace
Just to check—you haven’t told anyone about that job, have you? As it happens I’ve decided against.
Basically, I’ve always believed that work is all about the people. And although it was very flattering to be offered such a mega job at Sainsburys, at the end of the day I didn’t want to work with them. Apart from anything else fun wasn’t part of their DNA at all.
Feeling a bit rough this am. Hair of the dog later?
M
1
JANUARY
Myself—The Basics
JANUARY 1
From: Martin Lukes
To: Pandora@CoachworX!
Hi Pandora
I’m jotting down a few key facts re myself, so that we’ll be able to hit the ground running when we have our first Coachworx! session on Wednesday.
But first I’m going to be up front about the key learnings I want to take out from the coaching experience. For me, it’s about achieving peak performance. At the end of the day, it’s about winning. And that’s what I want to do—to win.
So, with that out of the way, who am I ?
Basically, I’m a board director of A&B (UK). Our parent company is based in Atlanta—and I’m Director of Marketing here in London. It’s an exciting and challenging leadership role, and I feel I play a critical role in shaping the business going forward. I have always seen myself as a high-octane player. I’m very results driven, very can-do.
However, over the last year I feel I have hit a plateau careerwise. Last month I was headhunted for the position of Marketing Director at Sainsburys. I was way out in front of the field in terms of skillsets, but at the end of the end they went for the safe choice—someone less talented but who had retail experience.
Frankly, following this setback, I am faced with a choice. Do I hunker down here, or do I play the field? I’ve thought deeply about this and have decided to stay at A&B for now, as my values are well aligned with the company—and at 43 I feel I still have a huge amount to contribute.
I think you wanted to know a few key facts re my home life? I’ve been married for 17 years to Jenny and we have two smashing boys. Jake is 15, and Max is 12. Jake is highly creative, though has some issues around behavior—which makes him typical for a youngster of his age. Max is a highflyer across the board—a chip off the old block, if you will. He’s doing Common Entrance this year—we’ve put him down for Eton, and according to his head teacher, he’s expected to walk it.
I’d say the marriage is definitely a happy one, albeit with the usual ups and downs. The only thing I’d flag up is that in the last couple of years Jens has been getting stressed about her career—she works part-time for a pr agency. Frankly I sometimes wonder if there are time of life issues at play too—I mentioned it to her the other day, but she didn’t see the funny side! She’s a year older than me, but she takes good care of herself, and is still a perfect size 4!
Home is in Wimbledon in a six bed villa we bought back in 1993 for £250,000, and has just been valued (conservatively for insurance purposes) at £1.9 mil!
You ask about my personal health and fitness, exercise regime, diet and alcohol levels. Basically I’m in reasonable health—if you push yourself as hard as I do, your immune system has to work 24/7! I try to get to the gym as often as possible—I’m in between personal trainers at the moment, but obviously would like to start again asap, time permitting. I’ve put on a bit of weight recently, and for Christmas Jens gave me Atkins Made Easy—The First Two Weeks. I’ve tried Atkins before but not stuck to it. This year it’s going to be different, and today is Day One!
Drink? I’m a great believer in the value of alcohol as a stress buster, but I don’t drink to excess. Probably in the region of 14–17 units a week, or thereabouts.
Smoking—no way. I’m very anti smoking. In fact this is something I’m totally passionate about. I’ve told both my boys that if they get to 18 without smoking I’ll give them both £1,000 cash in hand. At the end of the day, getting the incentive right is key. What do I get up to in my spare time? I don’t have any! Joking aside, I’d say it’s divided in three.
Golf—though I don’t get to play nearly as much as I’d like. Currently got a handicap of 14, which I’m not at all happy about.
My family. Of course they are mission critical in every sense of the word.
The culture scene. Theatre, opera, cinema, reading. Words mean a lot to me. I sometimes think I would have liked to be a writer, and have got lots of book ideas. But at the end of the day there are only so many hours available.
Hope that’s enough for now. I’m eagerly anticipating speaking with you on Monday at 3:30.
All my very bestest
Martin Lukes
JANUARY 2
From: Pandora@CoachworX!
To: Martin Lukes
Thank you for that Martin! It is always good to know as much about my clients as possible! We are embarking on an exciting life-changing journey together and I have the highest expectations of you. I’ll be your number one fan and I believe in your phenomenal potential to do, to have and to be whatever and whoever you want. Look forward to talking to you on Monday.
Strive and thrive!
Pandora
From: Martin Lukes
To: Sylvia Woods
WHERE THE HELL IS MY TIGER WOODS MUG? IT’S BLOODY TYPICAL—YOU GO ON HOLIDAY FOR A COUPLE OF DAYS, AND COME BACK TO FIND SOMEONE HAS TAKEN YOUR SODDING MUG.
From: Martin Lukes
To: Sylvia Woods
Hi Sylvia
False alarm—mug found. Happy New Year, hope you had a good one.
Would appreciate if you could get my expenses done this am, as Christmas cost me an arm and a leg. T
here’s a pile of receipts on your desk—some of which are blank—please make sure the total comes out slightly higher than this time last year, though not out of the ballpark.
Ta muchly, M
PS When you’ve got a mo, could you get me a latte and a bar of Green and Blacks white chocolate. Alas, no more almond croissants for me, as this is day two of Atkins!
From: Barry Malone, CEO
To: All Staff
Howdy!
First up, Happy New Year! This is a particularly joyous occasion as it is my first at the helm of this fine company.
New Year is a time for a new beginnning, not just for us as individual leaders but for us together, as a global family.
Over the festive holiday I met up with Chuck P. Stallone, the best coach basketball has ever seen. We got talking about what he had done to keep his team at the top for nearly two decades. Chuck said something to me that made a whole lot of sense. He said it wasn’t about getting to the top—but staying at the top. The name of his game is not “peak performance,” but Peak Performance—Permanently. And that is my dream for us. That we will peak perform not just this year, but every year going forward.
I want to share with you the image of stonemasons building a cathedral. Their task is no different to ours here at A and B. Why did they chisel that stone? Because their bodies and their souls bought into the idea.