Broken Dreams

by Rissa Blakeley

  “Elaina...Elaina, love, please put the gun down. It’s me. Henry,” he pleaded with me, quietly.

  “I can’t,” I whispered.

  “Love, can you tell me what’s wrong?”

  I swallowed hard. “You were one of them,” I whispered in a shaky voice.

  “I was who?” Could he really be that dumb, or was he just lacking in the common sense department?

  “Them! The undeads!” I shouted.

  “Shhh! Quiet down!” He whispered through his teeth. “It was just a nightmare, love. I’m as normal as can be.” He started to get out of the bed.

  “Stop.”

  He held his hands up. “Okay, love. Okay. What do you want me to do?”

  “Prove to me you are real.” My arm started to shake from the weight of the cool, heavy steel in my hand.

  “I’m real. Right here, right now. I don’t know how you want me to prove it to you. Tell me how.”

  “Get up slowly.” He did as he was told. He stood before me, naked, completely vulnerable, still with his hands raised in front of his chest, while I continued to aim the Sig at his head.

  “I’m here. Now, what do you need me to do?” He swallowed hard.

  “Show me your eyes.”

  “Okay.” He looked around the moonlit room. “There’s a flashlight over on the night stand. Is it all right if I get it?” I nodded, still aiming the Sig at him, following him as he moved about. He picked it up and turned it on. The light was dim, but it was functioning enough. He walked over to me and shined the light toward his eyes.

  They were gray, but not the gray, glazed eyes of the boy. I felt relief run through my body. I lowered the Sig to my side.

  “Here.” He held out his hand. “Give me the gun,” he demanded with a gentle voice. I handed it to him, and he set it back down on the dresser. I stood in front of him, embarrassed.

  “I’m sorry.” I looked down at my feet.

  “What happened?” He escorted me back to the bed.

  “I had a nightmare. You were you, but you were partially them.” My voice was shaky. “Your eyes were glazed over like the undead boy’s.” He pulled me close to him and held me, his cool, naked body pressed against mine.

  “It’s all right, love. It was just a dream,” he whispered over and over again, while he cradled me in his arms. He kissed the top of my head.

  “I was so scared.” We sat in silence for a few minutes.

  “Love, let’s not think about it anymore tonight. It scared you too much. Let’s try to get some more rest.” He pulled the blanket up and helped me get comfortable. “I’ll stay awake until you fall asleep.”

  For some reason, that made me feel better. I felt like he was protecting me. I drifted off again, hoping that I didn’t have another nightmare.

  ***

  I woke up, and Henry seemed to be sleeping peacefully for a change. I grabbed a bottle of water that was on the nightstand and headed to the master bathroom to clean up. I stood in the tub and poured the water all over me, slow and steady until the bottle was empty. It was so fucking cold that it woke me up instantly, standing every nerve at attention. Who needs caffeine when you can pour cold water all over your body? I was reminded of Henry’s chilly body against mine.

  My mind went to the previous night’s love making. I closed my eyes, seeing him, feeling his loving touch, and remembering how emotional he was. I sighed, envisioning him moving deep inside me. I ran my hand down my chest to my hip.

  Noises outside the bathroom window snapped me out of my slight erotic trance. While I towel dried myself, I looked out the window, trying to find the source. There were a few undeads staggering around in the street. I dressed in a flash and stormed out of the bathroom.

  “Henry?” He was no longer in bed. “Henry?” I said louder as I headed down the hallway. Claire was standing in the kitchen, trying to ration food for all of us. “Claire, where’s Henry?” Claire looked at Sophie, who was helping Nick and Nate fold up their blankets. “Hello? I;m asking a fucking question here!” My patience had worn thin. “Answer me, damn it!” Everyone was staring at me. I wanted to throat punch everyone until they started talking.

  “Um, he…he went...um…” Claire looked down at the food in front of her.

  “Somebody say something before I flip the fuck out!” I screamed so loud, my voice reverberated off the walls. My fists were clenched at my sides. My throat was burning.

  Sophie walked over to me. “He went out.” Those three simple words turned me into a cornered honey badger.

  “What? He went out? What the fuck do you mean he went out?!” I grabbed her arms in a death grip, and she winced in pain. “Tell me! Know what? Fuck you all…every last one of you! I’m going to find him!” I reached for a Sig and headed for the door.

  “No. You’re staying here.” Nick stood between me and the door.

  “Get the fuck out of my way, assface!” I raised the Sig at my brother. Nothing was going to get between Henry and me.

  “Sis, calm down.” With some hesitation, he walked forward and took the Sig out of my grip.

  “Why did you guys let him leave by himself? He said no one was to leave by themselves!”

  “He came out of the bedroom. He said he had something he needed to do, and he would be back. He left so suddenly that none of us had time to grab him. Not that we could have stopped him.” Nick didn’t sound confident about the situation.

  “Are you fucking with me because if you are...”

  “He’s telling the truth. Sophie and Claire hadn’t even came out of their room yet. It was just Nick and me.” I glared at Nate.

  “Nick, please tell me you didn’t let him go out there on his own!” I ran over to the front window that was covered with clear garbage bags, remembering the undeads that were roaming out there. “Oh, my god! He took the truck! He must be going somewhere far away!” I think I would have panicked over a hangnail at that point. I felt warm arms around me.

  “Honey, listen,” Claire said. “There was nothing Nick or Nate could have done. He was out of here in a flash. We just have to wait for him and hope he will come back soon.” She was trying to comfort me, but it only made me angrier.

  I wiggled free, and turned around to face my family. “You bastards! He could die out there! He could turn into an undead! He could be an undead…” I dropped to my knees. Claire tried to catch me. She knelt down and grabbed me by my shoulders.

  “It’ll be okay, Elaina. He will be back. This is Henry we’re talking about here. He knows what he’s doing. You have said so yourself. Try to have faith that he will return to you. Okay?” I shook my head.

  “He will come back,” Sophie said from across the room. “He’s a stubborn son of a bitch.”

  I was scared that the night before was the last time I would ever lock eyes with Henry again. I was fighting my emotions. I wanted to lash out at everyone, but I wanted to curl up in a ball and cry until my eyes swelled shut. My nightmare kept creeping into my thoughts. What if it was some sort of premonition?

  Time went by so fucking slow. I stood in front of the window like a lost puppy, waiting to see his truck reappear. Even Sophie was pacing the floor, whispering to herself. I don’t know if she was praying for him, or cursing at him under her breath. Each hour ticked by slower than the one before…and then it happened.

  Out of the eerie silence, I heard tires squealing in the distance. Everyone looked toward the window. I saw a blacked out Tahoe turn the corner.

  “It’s Henry!” Everyone rushed over to the window. He was slamming into undeads and running them over. He took out every single one on the road in front of him. There were still a few more wandering.

  He parked the truck and jumped out, standing on the side step. Henry pulled his rifle out of the truck. Then he picked them off with remarkable accuracy. The undeads were dropping like flies. He jumped down, slammed the door, and ran to the liftgate of the Tahoe.

  “What the hell is he doing?” I said with confusion.
Henry was grabbing bags of stuff out of the back of the truck, then made a mad dash for the building. “Sophie! He’s coming in!” Sophie pulled her Sig out and ran out the door.

  Within a minute, they both ran back into the apartment, winded. Henry dropped all the bags. I ran over to him and latched on to him. Then I stood back, and punched him in the stomach.

  “Argh!” Henry buckled over. “What the fuck, Elaina?”

  “Why did you leave? You could have been killed! Or worse! It was so stupid of you to leave on your own and not tell anyone where you were going! What if something happened to you? I’m so mad right now I could kick you in the fucking tomatoes!” Henry was still bent over, and had his hands on his knees. He nervously watched my feet, and rightfully so. That’s what he gets for scaring me like that.

  “Please don’t kick me. Jesus Christ.” He was still gripping his stomach.

  “What the fuck is wrong with you?!” I yelled at him as he straightened up.

  “I wanted to surprise you.” He pointed over at Claire. “Surprise you and Claire. Goddamn, you throw a hell of a punch.” He rubbed his abdomen. I looked back at Claire, and she shrugged her shoulders.

  “Surprise us?” I was blown away, and not in a good way. “You risked your life to surprise us?”

  “Look.” He pointed down at the bags. It was my luggage, and several bags full of clothes. There were bags of food, and medical and beauty supplies, as well. I gasped. Claire came running to us. “There are more bags of food and supplies in the truck.”

  “Oh, my god, Henry,” I whispered with amazement. At the sound of my excitement, he slowly began to smile.

  “Surprise,” he said, warily. I unzipped the luggage and rummaged through everything. I was admiring all the clothes that he had brought me, which I had packed for our honeymoon. It was mostly summer stuff, but I could layer.

  It made me a little bit sad that they were for our honeymoon that never happened, but I was so overjoyed with all of those clean panties and bras. Not to mention the additional clothes that he had grabbed. What can I say? I was easy to please…sometimes.

  “Henry? You went to both of our apartments?” Claire was still stunned.

  “Yes. I figured since they weren’t that far away from each other, I would give it a go. I did run into some areas of congestion, and had to make my own roads a few times.”

  I jumped up, hugged him, and planted a big kiss on his cheek. I looked into his eyes and they were brilliant green again. I stepped back, and confusion was obvious on my face. “What?”

  “Your eyes.”

  “My eyes?”

  “They are green again.” I was baffled. Had I imagined that his eyes were turning gray? He glanced over at Sophie. She cleared her throat and walked to the kitchen, away from the situation. “What’s going on?”

  “Ah yes, well, I’m feeling better today. I feel more rested.” He winked at me.

  Something was off, but I wasn’t sure what it was. I decided to let it go for the moment. I turned to Claire. “Well, let’s go put some clean panties on!” We both grabbed our bags and headed down the hall.

  ***

  Henry looked at Nick and Nate. “Don’t worry. I didn’t forget you guys. There’s more stuff out in the truck. I hit up your flat, Nick. What a fucking sty that was!”

  Nick smirked. “You didn’t happen to grab my guitar by any chance?”

  “Ah…I didn’t. I apologize.”

  “That’s quite all right. Thanks for doing this. Even though you royally pissed off Elaina, I know you did it to make her happy.”

  “That I did. Anything to make her smile. I’d do anything for her.” Nick and Henry nodded at one another. There was a newfound respect between the two of them. “You two want to come out with me to grab the rest?”

  “Sure,” Nick replied. They grabbed their guns and headed out. Nate covered Nick and Henry while they unloaded the truck. Lucky enough, there weren’t any more undeads wandering near them.

  ***

  “Well, look at you two. I’m glad you have clothes that actually look good and not frumpy.” Sophie smiled with delight, seeing us. The men came back in seconds later.

  “It’s not a fashion show, Sophie,” I said. Nate balked as he walked by with some clothes for himself.

  “Honey, it’s always a fashion show!” He yelled as he headed toward the bathroom to change. We all had a good laugh.

  Henry walked up to me. “Well, now, it’s nice to see that fabulous smile of yours.” He rubbed my cheek with his thumb. It was comforting. “Let’s get all this food put in the cupboards.” We unloaded the bags. There was everything from canned goods, to granola bars, to shelf stable milk. Plus, several cases of water.

  And let’s not forget all the alcohol. There were several cases of his favorite whiskey, and several cases of random bottles of wine, champagne, and liquor. I thought I caught a whiff of booze on his breath, but then I figured it was from the previous day’s minor boozy event.

  “Henry, where did you get all of this stuff?” We were in awe.

  “I may have found a store or two that were empty of the living.”

  “Were there undeads in there?”

  “Yeah. I took care of them and went on a spree.”

  “You didn’t take everything. You left some so that other survivors could get supplies if they needed it, didn’t you?”

  “Come on, Elaina. Of course I left some stuff. You know me better than that.” I hoped I did. I smiled at him.

  I grabbed a box of cereal and some of the shelf stable milk. Claire grabbed some canned fruit and we headed to the table. We sat around, eating together as a family. It was a rare moment where everything almost felt normal.

  After we ate, Henry’s team went out and swept a neighboring building. As soon as his team walked back in the door, I went to Claire. I was still concerned that she would react like the broken mirror incident every time she came back. I took her by the hand and pulled her over to the bookcase that spanned the entire front wall of the apartment, where no one else was standing.

  I whispered, “Are you alright?”

  “Yes. Yes, I think so.” She had some splatter on her cheek and a few speckles on her shirt.

  “Maybe we should rethink wearing our clothes to go out undead hunting. We should ruin Henry’s entire wardrobe first, before ours.” I winked and she chuckled. “Come on, let’s go get you cleaned up.” I took her by the hand, and we headed down to the bathroom.

  When we finished cleaning her up and changing her shirt, we headed back to the living room. Everyone was sitting around, waiting for us. Henry wanted to chat about where he wanted to go next.

  It was getting later in the day and the moon was lurking in the sky. I was hoping Henry decided it was enough for the day. He grabbed a bottle of booze, not wasting any time. He cracked it open and took a long pull from it. Then he opened the map, and I knew he wasn’t done.

  “There are three buildings here, like we discussed before. I want to clear the storefronts on the left, or at least as many as we can before the sun sets.” And there you go. My wish was not Henry’s command. I had to speak up.

  “Henry?”

  “Yeah, love?” Maybe he would be receptive.

  “I’m kind of thinking we should hang here, and we can go out in the morning.”

  “No, we need to clear areas as soon as we can. The less undeads roaming, the better chance of our survival. We have already wasted too much time.” Just as I suspected. Not one iota of receptiveness.

  “Okay. Well, I think our team should go out. You have already been out twice today, and maybe you should get some rest.” Nate was looking at me like I was a crazy woman. I had a feeling he just wanted to be protected and not have to work for it.

  “I think that’s a brilliant idea. Sophie, your team will take the next shift. Clear as many buildings on the left side of the street before the sun sets. We’ll do our best to keep an eye on you through the windows. I have a couple sets of bino
culars in the closet.” I was getting more nervous by the second, and started chewing on my thumbnail. “You okay, Elaina?”

  “Yeah. Yeah, I’m just thinking.” Thinking about death, or undeads, or true death. I shivered. Everyone was staring at me, waiting for me to freak out again.

  “Alright, you three make sure your guns are loaded. I want each of you to a carry an extra mag, and some sort of knife or axe in your packs.”

  Sophie and I got up, grabbed some packs, and loaded them up. Nate didn’t move, which Henry noticed immediately. I hoped “Angry Henry” wasn’t going to make a comeback. I wasn’t a fan of that guy.

  “Is there an issue, Nate?” His voice was curt. Shit.

  “Uh, well…”

  “Yes?” Henry barked. He seemed to be a little impatient. I could feel it coming on. The Henry storm was about to hit, and it was looking bleak.

  “I really don’t want to go out there.” Nate’s voice was quiet. Henry laughed, really laughed. He grabbed the bottle, and had himself another drink. Sophie and I looked at one another, then at Henry. We knew what was about to transpire.

  “I’m sorry. I thought you just said you really didn’t want to go out there.” Henry jumped up and grabbed Nate by the collar. Oh, man, not again. “Listen here, you little prat…”

  Sound the alarms. “Angry Henry” had returned. He was a mere inch from Nate’s face, who looked like he was on the verge of pissing himself. Nick was standing there, giggling.

  “You will go out there, and you will help Sophie and Elaina! None of us want to be doing this! None of us!” I decided it may be time to save Nate from his wrath.

  “Um, Henry?” I nervously grabbed his chilly arm.

  “What?!” he screamed, not even turning around.

  “Henry, I think we need to calm down just a teensy bit.” I pulled on his arm. “Come on. Let’s go chat for a minute.” Finally, he looked at me and then let go of Nate’s shirt, but not without a quick shove first. He shook my hand free from his arm. “Come on. Let’s go down the hall.”

  Everyone watched with apprehension as we walked by. Henry was so angry, he was shaking.