by Shelly Jones
“Why? Is this your way for making up for lost time? I don’t want your pity,” Katie snaps at me and takes her face out of my hands.
“It’s not pity or me kissing ass Katie. If I had known what he’d done to you, I would have been back! But no one told me anything, not even Brady. He and I still have some unfinished business to take care of but that’s between us.”
“I had no idea everyone was protecting me. I tried to ask about you and they all claimed they hadn’t talked to you.”
“That’s such bull shit too,” I snap. “When did all of that bull shit happen?”
“What do you mean?”
“Month and year?”
“End of May, early June of 2009. Why?”
Son of a bitch! I clinch my fist. “I was talking to Steve around that time and I asked about you. I was supposed to come home June tenth, but Steve told me not to because you didn’t want to see me anymore!”
“Why were you going to come home?”
“Because I knew something was wrong, but again, no one told me anything and they told me to leave you alone. Even your dad told me to stay away.” Not really the whole truth there, I was actually going to move back and beg her to forgive me and start our lives together, but I won’t tell her that, not right now at least. Katie is sitting there just staring at me. I’m numb. I can’t believe this shit. She was in trouble and I wasn’t allowed to be around her. Mother fuckers. I’m going to kill Brady. I swear to god I’m going to.
“I’m sorry Eric,” she whispers.
I slide over by her and slide off the couch and get on my knees in front of her.
“Don’t, if I didn’t leave the way I did, they wouldn’t have had to protect you, I could have. I’m so sorry.”
“You know I always knew Steve was keeping something from me, but I could never really pin point what, now it all makes sense.” She’s shaking her head. “You want a beer,” she asks as she cracks a smile.
“I thought you would never ask.”
I stand up and give her my hands and help her up. She leans into my chest and stays there just long enough for me to inhale her sent. She smells like Vanilla, like she always used to.
She breaks away from me and we walk into the kitchen where she opens the refrigerator and hands me a beer and gets one for herself. She hops up on the counter. “So do you really think if there’s anything bad in those letters we can keep him locked up?”
“I know we can. It will show he’s still a threat.” She takes a long drink of her beer.
We stand a talk for a little bit. “As much as I would love to hang out all night, I should let you go and get to bed,” I tell her finishing my beer.
“Yeah I guess,” she says in almost a whine.
“Do you want me to take these letters and go through them?”
She takes a deep breath. “Sure, I’m not even sure I want to know what’s in them.”
“Well if there’s anything bad in them, I will have to tell you, and we’ll need to get a hold of the District Attorney right way.”
“Fuck! Ok...” She blows out a breath. “Should we let the District attorney know either way?”
“Not sure, I’ll let my dad know and go from there, deal?”
“Sounds good.”
She hands me the box. Our hands graze each other and I honestly felt like I had just been electrocuted.
“Hey, do you even have my number,” she asks me.
“Nope, I don’t.”
She grabs a piece of paper, “Well then here, it’s my cell phone. Please don’t let anyone know you have it, especially Reagan or Heidi.”
“I won’t. I don’t ever let my phone out of my sight. So no worries, I promise.”
“Thank you,” she says letting out a breath.
“Alright, well I guess I’ll see you at the wedding, unless there’s something in these letters.”
“Ok, have a good night.”
“You too Katie.”
She smiles at me and walks me to the door.
“Thanks for letting me come over and hang out.”
“Thanks for coming over. It’s been fun and informative.” She gives me a weak smile.
“Well good night,” I say and I lean down and kiss her on the forehead.
“Night Eric,” she says as she stands on her tip toes and kisses me on the cheek.
I’m walking to my truck and I hear, “Eric!” I turn and look at her, “Save me a dance?”
“I’ll save you a dance or two.” She smiles and closes the door.
I rush home hoping my dad is still awake. I get inside and notice the lights still on.
“You’re still up. Good!”
“What’s up Eric?” my dad says looking at me weird.
“Want to help me go through these letters to see if there’s anything to keep that bastard locked up?”
“I’ll grab us both a beer,” he says patting me on the back. “Holy shit, There’s a lot here. Let’s hope there’s something in one of these to keep him locked up.”
“Let’s hope so dad. I’m going to do whatever I can to protect her.” My dad’s eyes about popped out of his head.
“Good! Well let’s get to reading shall we?”
I nod my head, take a drink of my beer, and open the first of many letters.
Chapter 9
Katie
I lock up the house and head to my room. Those couple of beers really made me tired.
I slip into my normal boxers and tank top and crawl into bed. It doesn’t take long and I’m passed out, but my dream isn’t a dream, it’s a nightmare.
“Hey Rach, I’m just pulling up to Dean’s house. I’ll call you in a few minutes. Still wanna meet at the bar?”
“Yes, but be careful Katie. He’s going to flip out when you break up with him.”
“Nah, I think it’ll be fine. Neither one of us has been happy for a while.”
“Yes but his temper. I know he’s been hitting you.”
“Rach stop worrying. It’s fine. He just gets a little excited. I don’t think he would ever really hurt me. Ok I just saw him look out his window so I’m going in. Call you in a few and see you soon.”
“Yeah, if I don’t hear from you in fifteen minutes I’m coming over. I love you!”
“Love you too Rach,” I say hanging up the phone. I look in the rear view mirror. “You can do this,” I say to myself. He’s getting too rough with me and it’s time to move on. I don’t even have to knock because he’s standing there waiting for me when I get out of the car.
He looks different tonight. His blue eyes are red, blonde hair messier then normal, and his face flushed. He’s wearing jeans and a red t-shirt. I think to myself, he’s a nice looking guy; 6’1” weighing about 190 pounds with a nice body too.
“Hi,” I say and smile at him.
“What the fuck took you so long?” he snaps at me as I’m walking into his house. He slams the door behind me and I jump. He’s pissed about something but I don’t know what.
“Sorry, I was talking to my dad about dinner tomorrow night,” I lie.
“Oh.”
“Dean, you ok?”
“Nope, I’m not.”
“Want to talk about it?”
“Why did you come over here tonight Katie?”
“To see you, I thought that’s what boyfriend and girlfriends do,” I say smiling.
“A little birdy told me you were coming here to break up with me,” he snaps. Fuck, my stomach does a nose dive and I all of a sudden feel sick.
I swallow hard. “Who told you?”
“Does it matter,” he says stalking over to me, like an animal stalking his prey. I’m scared.
“Yes it does matter.”
“I have friends who talk to yours. So why don’t you have the balls to tell me face to face that we’re breaking up.” He has me up against the wall, his face inches from mine. I can feel his breath on my face.
“I only talked to two people.”
“
Well cunt, are we or aren’t we breaking up?”
“Dean, I can’t do this anymore... We fight all the time, we’re just not happy anymore. I think we both know this and well, you’re hurting me.”
He grabs a hold of my arms, “Awe am I hurting you, bitch?”
“Dean let go of me please...”
“Fuck you,” he spits in my face.
I can’t move my arms; he’s got me pinned up against the wall tightly. Fuck. I try and move my arms and his grip gets tighter. I’ve never seen this look in his eyes before. It’s almost as if he’s getting pleasure from hurting me. When he suddenly lets go, I think I can get away when I feel a hand across the side of my face. “YOU BITCH,” he shouts at me.
“FUCK YOU DEAN,” I grab the side of my face and shout.
This time I’m moving when he grabs my arm and pulls me into him with his other arm, I push him hard enough to where he loses his grip on my arm. I start to head for the front door when he grabs the back of my shirt and pulls hard. I fall back into his chest and he spins me, slamming me up against the wall, then I feel his hands around my throat and he’s pushing and squeezing and I can’t fucking breath. I pound on his chest and he just grips tighter. I finally get my thoughts together and my knee goes up into his groin and he falls over in pain.
I get ready to run and he grabs me again, this time throwing me down on the ground. He sits on top of me and starts hitting me everywhere. Punch after punch after punch. I can feel my face bleeding, I’m pretty sure he’s broken my nose and my jaw.
“I hate you, you fucking bitch,” he spits in my face.
He gets up and I have no idea where he is, I roll over, trying to crawl my way out when I feel his boot in my ribs. I scream out in pain and he kicks me again.
I just lay there crying. The more I fight the worse it gets. This is it; this is the end of my life.
With one last ditch effort, I try and roll over again and crawl my way out. I can’t breathe, I feel like I’m being suffocated. He towers over the top of me and all I see is his boots. I feel him grabbing my hair, and when my head slams into the floor and I hear the words, “It’s all your fault,” and that’s all I remember until I hear a girl’s voice screaming my name.
“Oh MY GOD Katie, wake up. Wake up Katie,” she’s shouting.
I open my eyes slightly.
“Katie,” Rachel says with tears rolling down her face.
She is pushed back and I see these brown eyes staring into mine.
“Katie, do you know where you are?” the man asks.
“No,” I whisper.
“Do you know who this is,” he says with Rachel over me.
“Rachel...” I whisper hoarsely. “Mr. Reed? Help me,” I ask.
“Yes Katie, I am Mr. Reed. Honey you’re going to be fine. You need to stay with me though ok? You have to fight. I won’t leave your side,” he’s saying to me, while grabbing my hand. I start to close my eyes and he starts talking to me again.
I wake up shaking. “Oh my fucking god,” I shout. I look over at the clock its two am. I get up to go check on Ava who is sound asleep and head to the kitchen to grab a drink of water. Damn, I haven’t had that nightmare in a long ass time.
I try and get back to sleep, but it’s not easy. I toss and turn. The morning is going to suck! I think I’m going to see if Steve’s mom will watch Ava for a few hours.
Later that morning, Ava and I get up, we make breakfast and I go outside to get the newspaper when I notice there’s an envelope taped to my door.
I grab the envelope and the newspaper and go back inside. I put them both on the counter. I just stare at the envelope. Screw it, I decide to read the letter and sit at the counter.
Dear Katie,
Well baby if you’re reading this, then that means I didn’t make it back to you and the baby. I told my mom to give you this letter either right away or when the time was right. Before I get into why I’m writing to you, I want you to know that I love you. I’ve loved you since the day I met you when we were juniors in high school. I know your heart wasn’t mine back then, and baby to this day, I don’t think I’ve ever had your heart completely, but you had mine. I wanted nothing more than to be the man who took care of you and made your dreams come true. Even after we got married and found out we were pregnant, I knew your heart was never mine. It belongs to Eric Reed.
Please don’t hate me for what I’m about to say. Eric has tried many times to get a hold of you. Even when you were in the hospital and the doctors told us to get a hold of him because that’s who you kept asking for. I knew I couldn’t and I wouldn’t allow it. Your dad did and agreed with me, so we kept him away. Brady and Rachel were never apart of this so please don’t hate them. They knew nothing.
That night Eric broke your heart after graduation, I made a promise to myself that I would never let anything or anyone hurt you ever again. I kept close to you, but baby I failed so badly with Dean.
When Dean hurt you the way he did, I couldn’t live with myself anymore. I actually thought about killing myself because I failed to keep you safe. I let you down. I wasn’t there to protect you. Dean was supposed to show you that I was the man for you, but was never supposed to do what he did to you. Never did I think he would go that far with you. So when you woke up asking for Eric, I died a little inside. We all got together and decided to keep Eric away from you and that I was going to protect you.
Katie I’ve been living with this for a long time and there were so many times I wanted to tell you and I was going to, but then I decided to ask you to marry me and then, I was going to tell you after that but we found out we were pregnant and I just decided I couldn’t tell you. I didn’t want to risk losing you or the baby for that matter. I was prepared to go to my grave with this secret and then I would let you know the truth after I was gone.
Katie, I am SO sorry, I never meant to hurt you or anyone else. I was just doing this to keep you safe, but I’ve realized you were never really mine to keep safe. You were always Eric’s, never mine. I don’t know where Eric is or anything, but if you see him, will you tell him I’m sorry? You’re probably cussing me right now and will probably end up hating me and that’s ok. I’ll always love you and will always be watching you from heaven. Katie, I want you to be happy and safe. Please keep our baby safe. I hope you find happiness and I honestly hope you and Eric find your way back to each other.
It will always be you for me Katie, even if I wasn’t always for you.
Always your soldier.... Steven David Tanner
“Are you fucking kidding me? Really Steve?! What the hell,” I shout and it makes Ava jump, “Oh mama’s sorry baby.” I walk over and hug her. Do I want to bother Rachel with this right before the wedding? No cause this isn’t Rachel’s issue. This is between Me, Steve and Eric and the fact Steve kept Eric from me!
I grab my phone and hit call...
“Katie? Is everything ok?”
“It’s fine. Can I see you?”
“Sure, when?”
“Now. Where are you?”
“At my parents.”
“I’ll be there in fifteen minutes.”
I grab Ava and get her in her car seat and head out.
I pull into the driveway of the house I love coming over too. It’s a two story farm house on three acres of land. It hasn’t changed one bit since we were kids.
Ava and I get out and start walking up the driveway to the front porch.
“Hey...”
“Hey Eric,” I say, walking right up to him and wrap my arm around his waist
“You ok?”
The tears start to roll down my face. “No.”
He cradles my face in his hands, “Here give me Ava and tell me what’s wrong?”
“I had the nightmare again. I was reliving that night all over again. But this time, I wasn’t in my body. I was just over the top watching it happen like a horror movie. I should have fought harder.”
“Shit Katie, I wish I could take the pain awa
y. I wish I would have been there that night to protect you.”
I reach into my purse, “Well I think I figured out why you weren’t,” I whisper and hand him the letter, taking Ava back.
“What’s this?”
“Read it Eric,” I say walking away from him and I take a seat on the swing.
He opens up the letter and reads it.
“What the fuck?” he says.
“That’s what I said.”
“All those times I called your phone, your dad, Steve, they all kept me away from you. Oh my god,” he says again, pacing back and forth.
I watch Ava play with the flowers on the front porch. She has no idea what’s going on and thank god for that right now.
“What’s even more fucked up, in this letter is the whole Dean shit. Did he set you two up?”
I start to laugh, “Yep he did.”
“Jesus, was Steve that messed in the head to do something like that?” Eric says now more in a whisper so Ava doesn’t hear.
“I don’t know Eric, I haven’t a fucking clue!” I shrug my shoulders.
Eric and I sit out front for a while when his dad pulls in. “Shit,” I whisper.
“What?”
“Your dad’s eyes were the last eyes I remember seeing until I woke up a few days later.”
“Do you want to leave?”
“No, I’ll be fine. I’ve seen your dad since that night. Just with the nightmare, it’s just weird.”
“Katie, sweetie it’s good to see you and oh my you brought my Ava with you,” Mr. Reed says.
“Hi Mr. Reed,” I say standing up to greet him and I’m surprised by the big hug he gives me.
“What brings you here? Not that I’m complaining.”
“A letter was dropped off and it’s got her shaken up a little,” Eric tells him.
“Is it from Dean?”
“No,” I shake my head.
“Then who is it from,” Mr. Reed asks.
“Steve.”
“From Steve?” he almost shouts.
“Yep from Steve,” I start to laugh.
“Do I even want to know what’s in the letter?”