by DC Renee
That got me thinking about how not only was I ruining my life, but I was ruining his because he had to take care of me when I was too far gone. And then when I thought back to how sad Mason had looked, I realized I had ruined his life, not once, but now twice. Finally, I thought about you and how I had been jealous all my life because I thought you had it all, but I was wrong. And when you finally did, I was taking it all away from you too. Call me sentimental or some shit, but you are my family after all. And what I saw in Mason’s eyes was pure love and pure despair, all for you.
I wasn’t sure if I really wanted to kill myself or if I wanted one last hoorah before I decided to do something good for a change, but let’s just say I knew what I was doing. And clearly, if I survived, you wouldn’t be reading this, and let’s just hope I hadn’t reconsidered and was strong enough to right some wrongs for once. I’d like to think I was better than mom and would have done that, but I guess we’ll never know.
Anyway, I told Eddie everything. I told him what I did to Mason and told him I needed to help you guys somehow. The kid’s real smart. He told me I needed to confess and get it notarized. So, you’ll find my confession that I lied and falsely accused Mason Tredwell of rape all notarized and shit in here too. And since Eddie knows it all, I guess he can be a witness. I hope you can use this to clear your man and live happily ever after.
Before you think I’m some saint in hiding or something, I have to say that even though Mason’s love for you got me thinking about this, I really did it for selfish reasons. And my selfish reason is Eddie. I don’t want this life for him. I don’t want him to wake up one day and turn to drugs because he thinks he can’t handle it anymore like I did. And I’m betting that you and Mason are good enough people to take care of him. I need you to watch over him, make sure he stays out of trouble, gets good grades, goes to a good college and makes something of himself. And in case you haven’t read between the lines, that involves money, and that’s something neither I nor Samantha have. Obviously, I’m not asking you to take him away from his mom, but maybe you can help her a little too, but really, I only care about Eddie, and if Samantha is taken care of, then Eddie is free to take care of himself. He’s a good kid, a great kid, and he deserves a better life.
So use this information to clear Mason and live your life happily. Think of me often, and watch Eddie grow.
I’ll end this saying the one thing I wished someone would tell me.
I love you.
Hope I earned a little love back too,
Katherine
Kat had been holding back tears while reading the letter, but when she looked at the attached confession, detailing everything Katherine had done and lied about, she knew it was real. And then she sobbed. She clutched the letter to her chest and cried. After a few moments, she felt a hand on her shoulder and looked at Eddie sitting beside her. There were tears in his eyes and when she looked at him, he nodded, as if he knew what she was asking. Was this real?
This moment was bittersweet for Kat. She got what she wanted, but at the cost of the sister whom she finally realized could have been saved. Katherine had earned a little love back; in fact, she earned a lot of love back. Thanks to one letter, Kat understood her better than she thought and loved her more than she could have imagined. And as she pulled Eddie into a hug, she kept whispering over and over, “Thank you Katherine, I do love you.”
Chapter 44
Kat wasn’t sure how long it would take to get Mason cleared once she filed the appropriate paperwork and went through the right channels. Trent helped her the entire time, and she was forever grateful to him. Until everything was in writing and Mason’s name was officially cleared, she still didn’t want to see him or even speak to him. It was too painful for her because even though she was sure he would be cleared now, she still looked like the woman that had taken his life from him. Even though Katherine had redeemed herself and then some, it still didn’t change the past. It still didn’t change what Mason had to go through; the pain, violation, and humiliation he suffered. She knew she’d have to get over that because deep down she knew Mason did truly love her, but until she could clear him, she felt like she had nothing to offer.
So when he tried to reach out to her, she pushed him away. He called and stopped by and wrote her emails and texts, but she couldn’t even tell him to give her time because she didn’t want to give either of them false hope. She had learned her lesson. The last time she asked him to wait, something bad happened.
She told Mason she needed to get herself in order and that she was working on something, but that was as much as she would tell him. She always kept her voice flat and her emotions in check even though she was dying inside every time she heard his voice.
Kat kept telling herself that it would just be a little bit more and she could finally have her happily ever after.
*****
The month after Katherine’s funeral was hell for Mason. He tried to stay away from Kat for the first few days, tried to give her some space and time, but then he couldn’t take it anymore. He became somewhat of a stalker. He called her, went over to her apartment, contacted her, tried everything he could to get her to at least speak to him, but it was like she was made of stone. Every time he spoke to her, she sounded distant, but he could hear the underlying hurt and it killed him to know it was all because of him. If he hadn’t mistaken her for her sister, she wouldn’t be in this situation in the first place. And as much as he loved her and wanted to be with her and was secretly grateful for his own stupid mistaken identity error, he wanted her to be happy above all. And she sounded anything but happy. But he couldn’t give up. He didn’t want to.
He lifted his phone to dial her number to try to talk some sense into her yet again when it lit up. It was his lawyer. Mason only spoke to his lawyer when they had business to settle, like when he needed to set up an account for Kat to access. So when his lawyer called him, he was tempted to ignore it and get back to him later so he could call Kat. But then he was afraid it might have something to do with Kat, so he picked up, and his life changed.
He was cleared; his name was cleared. He got a formal apology and a huge settlement. But as much as he had wanted to celebrate that moment, he couldn’t because all he could think of was Kat. He wanted to hug her and kiss her and tell her he was a free man. But she wasn’t there. It didn’t stop him from wanting the details so he could go find her and share.
“Who? What? Where? How? I don’t understand.” The standard questions were out of his mouth in an instant.
“Apparently, the accuser confessed her crimes in a letter to her sister. There was even a witness. The name on the account I set up before sounded awfully familiar. And a match for the sister’s name. I have a feeling this will be a good story. You’ll have to share with me one day. But for now, I’ll let you go celebrate this wonderful news.”
They discussed the fact that he would have to sign a bunch of paperwork and meet with some officials, but he was basically free.
He thanked him profusely and hung up. He knew exactly where he was headed.
*****
Kat could breathe. Finally, after months, it felt like she could finally breathe. Trent had just informed her that Mason was a free man. She fell into her chair, relieved and scared and nervous, but mostly, she was happy. She wasn’t even happy for herself, she was happy for Mason. He deserved this. He deserved to be cleared, to be able to choose his life without a stain on his record or reputation. He deserved to be happy, and she hoped he was.
It felt like only minutes when someone knocked, no, pounded on her door. She jumped, startled, and then went to open it and there he was. He was beaming, but he didn’t move. He just stared at her, a smile on his lips, but caution in his eyes.
Finally, the corners of her mouth lifted in a smile of their own and he pounced. He lifted her in his arms and spun her around. Then he put her back down. “Thank you,” he said softly, but seriously.
“I take it you’re clear
ed?”
“I am!” he shouted, throwing his head back and laughing. “And it’s all thanks to you.”
“Actually, it was thanks to Katherine.”
“I heard, but it was also because of you. You didn’t give up and you pushed, and then God knows what you went through this past month to get this all to add up. That’s why you pushed me away, wasn’t it? So you could do this for me?”
She nodded slowly.
“Oh God, Kat. I love you so much. I am the luckiest man alive to have someone like you looking out for me.” And then he kissed her and she felt every one of his words come to life in that kiss. He kissed her like he was dying and only her lips could save him. She didn’t want the kiss to end. They pulled apart after minutes, panting.
“So now what?”
“Well, first we are going to celebrate. Then I’m going to show you just how grateful I am to have you in my life and how much I love you and worship you.”
She giggled and slapped his arm playfully, but then changed her tone and spoke seriously. “As awesome as that sounds, you know what I mean. You can do anything now. You don’t have to work handyman jobs anymore. You don’t have to hide out from the world and feel like an imposter. You can go back to being a doctor, going to charity events, everything you used to do.”
He appeared to be in thought for a moment, “Honestly, I don’t know. I didn’t think that far ahead. I just heard and came here as soon as I found out. But maybe I’ll try to refresh my medical knowledge and get back to doing what I love. Who knows? Right now, all I care about is you and how much I missed you. God, these past few months have been torture.” He leaned down to kiss her again, but she couldn’t. She pushed him away lightly and he looked confused.
Just when she thought things would turn out differently, just when she thought she’d finally get to be with Mason, she had to go and get a damn conscience. She couldn’t let him dive into a relationship with her. He had the opportunity to get his old life back, and she didn’t belong in it. She would either hold him back because he wouldn’t want to hurt her or he’d plunge headfirst into his old life, and she would be the one left behind. He would resent her for that and then maybe he would see her as her sister, even though deep down she knew the latter was ridiculous, and only something she made herself believe to feel better about being away from Mason. But either way, she couldn’t keep him to herself. What if the only reason he loved her was because of the life he was living now? He wasn’t a prestigious doctor anymore; he didn’t have the riches and the posh lifestyle, so her meager one fit right in. But, what if when he went back to it all, he would realize he was better suited with someone that came from a higher class? He’d either leave Kat and she wouldn’t be able to handle that, or he’d be too loyal and stick with her at the expense of his own happiness. No, she couldn’t do that to him or her. She had to let him go; she had to free him so he could find himself and figure out his future without her dragging him down. So she did the hardest thing she’d ever had to do; she let him go.
“Mason, I’m so happy for you. I really am. This is everything I’ve worked for, and it’s paid off. But, I’m sorry, there is no you and me. I can celebrate with you, but only as a friend.”
“What are you talking about?” Mason asked.
“I’m sorry; I just don’t want to be with you.”
“You don’t mean that. I know you don’t. Whatever you’re afraid of, we’ll work through it all. I love you. And I know you love me.”
She shook her head. He was right; she did love him, with all her heart. That’s why she knew what she was doing was the best thing for him. As long as he believed she loved him, he wouldn’t let her go.
“I’m so sorry, Mason, but I don’t”
“You don’t what?”
“I’ve had a lot of time to think for myself, and I do care about you, a lot. But I don’t love you. Whatever I felt for you was because of our situation. And now that we’ve spent time apart, I’ve figured that out. I don’t love you, not like that.”
“No Kat, you’re lying. I know you are.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered as she pulled away completely, not lifting her eyes to his. She was sorry for a lot of things, for the mess he was in, the pain she had caused, the lies she was telling.
“No, no, don’t say that. Whatever is going on in that head of yours, we’ll figure it out. Don’t push me away because you’re afraid. I know that’s what this is.”
She pushed back the tears that were trying to break free and lifted her eyes to meet his. She pushed all thoughts to the back of her mind and let only her steely resolve show through her eyes. Yes, it was resolve for what she was doing rather than what she was saying, but she knew Mason wouldn’t tell the difference. He just had to believe she meant what she said.
“I don’t love you, Mason. And I’m not sure what I felt before was real love either. I had hoped maybe we could stay friends, but that’s clearly not a good idea. You should go. You need to leave.” Her voice was flat as she led him toward the door. He followed like a zombie, barely moving, face contorted in pain as if he was suffering from some kind of physical damage.
“Goodbye, Mason. Good luck,” she said as she closed the door in his face. She waited for over half an hour until she heard his footsteps leave. He had stood there, on the other side of the door, face frozen in confusion for over half an hour. Once he left, she allowed herself to feel the pain she was in. She doubled over, the agony in her heart ripping her apart, and the tears began to run freely.
Chapter 45
“Get up!” Benny’s voice made Mason wince.
“Leave me alone,” whined Mason. It had been almost three weeks since Kat broke his heart and ripped it to shreds. She didn’t love him. He spent the first few days calling Trent, Benny, and even Adam, complaining and complaining. But they all just told him that there was no way she didn’t love him, and he must have done something wrong; that he’d better figure it out and fix it. But he knew better. He had seen it in her eyes. She looked at him with conviction when she spoke her words, telling him that not only did she not love him, but she wasn’t sure she ever had.
He couldn’t blame her, really. He had kidnapped her and she didn’t have anyone else. How could she not grow to care for him? How could she not think it was love when it was only a longing to be close to someone, anyone? But, once she was free, the feelings became apparent for what they really were, just some form of Stockholm syndrome. Yet she still went ahead and did everything in her power to clear his name. Why? Because she was genuinely a good person, that’s why. It certainly wasn’t because she loved him.
After he couldn’t stomach listening to his friends accuse him of hurting her, he turned to alcohol and when he couldn’t stay drunk all the time anymore, he just became a moping slob. And that was when Benny clearly thought Mason had enough.
“Goddamn it, Mason! Why the hell do I always have to be the voice of reason? You know, I used to have a reputation as a hard ass. And you know why? Because it was true, I didn’t give a damn about people or things or even myself, but then I had to go and become friends with you. And now, I feel like I’m living in a freaking soap opera and suddenly the bad guy ain’t so bad anymore.” Benny was talking to himself, mostly, Mason knew, but he also knew Benny was talking loud enough for Mason to hear on purpose. Mason was pretty sure Benny was saying these things to get Mason to snap out of it since he should really be the straight-edge one, not the laying on the couch, smelling like day-old pizza one. But he couldn’t bring himself to care.
“Fuck, man. The place is a mess and you stink. What the hell are you doing? You were supposed to go to your lawyer’s office the other day and he called me saying you never showed up and he couldn’t get a hold of you.”
“It doesn’t matter.”
“Like hell it doesn’t. Kat didn’t do all this for you so you could be a lazy-ass loser.”
“You think I care about all that?” Mason snapped, finally sitting
up. “You think I give a shit about having my name cleared or being able to practice medicine again? I don’t give a fucking shit! Why? Because I can’t share it with Kat. I wanted my life back for so long and then I fell for Kat and I didn’t care about it anymore. I wanted a new life with her. Yes, sure, it was wonderful to have my name cleared, but that was so she wouldn’t be ashamed of me. And so I could earn her respect and her love and her trust. And be the man she deserved. But if she doesn’t want me, then what the hell do I need all that other shit for? Myself? No! Fuck that!”
“Did you ever think to, I don’t know, maybe tell her all that?” Benny asked.
“I didn’t get a chance to. She kicked me out and closed the door in my face.”
“And that’s it? You didn’t call her? You didn’t go back over there? You just left and decided that was it?”
“She doesn’t love me. What am I supposed to do? Force her to?”
“Bullshit!” Benny spat. “You are a coward. She loves you. I know she does. You want to tell me she loves you one day and then magically decides she doesn’t the next? It doesn’t work that way and you know it.”
“It was never love.”
“Again, I call bullshit. It was love, plain as day. And deep down, under all that self-pity, you know it. You just let her go with no fight and no challenge. You just decided that she meant what she said. You know, she’s just as miserable as you. Why do you think that is? Hmm? Why would someone who doesn’t love you be miserable without you?”