Andre the Giant

by Michael Krugman

After a time, he walks over to where Studd and Perry are brawling and takes Studd’s arms from behind, holding him for the Refrigerator’s attack. André soon grabs hold of both big men for a noggin knocker. Perry falls and immediately heads to the next corner, where the Hart Foundation is waiting. André and Studd continue, with André squashing and butt-blocking his nemesis against the buckles. He tries to put Studd over the top, but Big John wraps his legs around the ropes. From behind, Hart and Francis attack André, though Bruno quickly yanks the Hitman away. Iron Sheik comes over and works on André’s back. Bruno comes back and removes the Sheik as Studd comes off the ropes, back into the ring.

  André stalks Francis and throttles him in the corner. To his credit, Francis keeps attacking, with shoulderblocks to André’s midsection actually doubling the Giant over against the turnbuckles. A big headbutt sends Francis flying, but he comes back for more. He wraps his arms around André as Studd runs over and hits André with a double ax-handle. Studd kicks Francis in the gut and goes to work on André. The Giant falls, taking a seat in the corner. Studd is distracted as Perry tackles the Hart Foundation, though both avoid elimination. Studd and Perry face off. Perry tackles Studd, and then tries it again. Studd gets his elbow up and tosses the Refrigerator over.

  Meanwhile, Francis and Hart battle, while André rests on one knee. Perry reaches up to shake Studd’s hand but pulls him over when he agrees. Francis rests in one corner while the Hart Foundation works on André. They move over to Francis, but André tosses them off and headbutts Francis himself. The Harts hit a double dropkick on André and he gets tied up in the ropes. With André trapped, they go to work on Francis, pitching him up and over.

  André is loose, and the Hart Foundation pounds at him in the corner. Hart shoots the Anvil into a tackle on André, doubling him over. They each grab a leg, but he kicks them both off. Neidhart whips Hart into André, but the Giant gets a boot up and Bret goes down. André, now enraged, takes Anvil by the beard, lifts up the Hitman, and hits a noggin knocker. He lifts Neidhart by the goatee and

  The Hart Foundation tries a double dropkick, WrestleMania 2.

  shoots him into the ropes for a big boot, which bounces the Anvil over. Hitman goes up top, but André catches him and presses him over onto his partner to win the Battle Royal at 9:13.

  “André the Giant, the winner of more Battle Royals than any man in the history of professional wrestling,” notes Gorilla Monsoon upon the match’s conclusion.

  Later that same month, André returned to Japan for a series of tours that would keep him in action for the next three months. Among the highlights of his itinerary was a match with New Japan Pro Wrestling’s Akira Maeda in Tsu, Japan. Maeda had been one of the top names in Japan’s renegade UWF promotion, known for their stiff, full-contact style and their condemnation of other styles of professional wrestling. When UWF went under, he returned to his first home, New Japan, and pioneered a blend of submission and pro spots that made him a Superstar.

  Maeda never lost to anyone but Yoshiaki Fujiwara, whom he considered a real competitor. As a result of that, and his vocal disdain for pro wrestling, Maeda received minimal cooperation from visiting Western wrestlers such as André.

  When the two iron-willed wrestlers met in the ring, it was clear from the bell that there was going to be trouble. The Giant refused to sell for Maeda, shrugging off his shooter gimmick by no-selling submission holds and even going for his opponent’s eyes. It wasn’t long before the match spiraled out of control, with neither man willing to lose.

  Maeda attempted to take out André’s increasingly weak knee, shoot-kicking, then immediately backing away. After fifteen minutes, he finally toppled the Giant with a single-leg takedown. Even down, André remained the power. He challenged Maeda to pin him, knowing that his opponent understood one of the cardinal rules of wrestling: no one pins André. Still, Maeda made a point of asking another wrestler at ringside if he could cover the Giant, but was told no.

  In the midst of this chaos, NJPW promoter Antonio Inoki ran down the ring and called for the bell, not even bothering to explain why. The abrupt ending infuriated André, who complained that he wanted to go back to the ring and continue the match. However, Inoki was not about to let that happen—even an angry André was less dangerous than allowing such a strange and revealing match continue.

  Back in the United States, André became embroiled in an altogether different controversy, one that ultimately led to his storyline suspension from World Wrestling Federation. The Giant was to resume his long-running program with Bobby Heenan and the Heenan Family with a Tag Team match pitting him and the partner of his choice against Big John Studd & King Kong Bundy on an April installment of Prime Time Wrestling. However, when André missed the match, an infuriated Heenan began calling for the Giant’s suspension. It took weeks of on-air campaigning, but the Brain eventually got his wish.

  May 12, 1986: Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, NY

  Greg Valentine & Brutus Beefcake are squashing George Wells & Mike Saxon when Bobby Heenan interrupts Vince McMahon at the announce table.

  “I’ve got some big news for you and everybody in professional wrestling and everybody out there,” declared the Brain. “As of this week, that mess with André the Giant, where he walked . . . he didn’t even show up for the match with Studd, in that Tag match. He didn’t even represent himself. Well, I had a meeting with the president of World Wrestling Federation, Jack Tunney. I told ya I was gonna get something done and something has been done. As of this week, André the Giant has been, listen to this, suspended from professional wrestling.”

  “I have some difficulty believing that one,” says Vince.

  “Well, I’m gonna make a formal announcement later on, but right as of now, André the Giant is formally suspended from professional wrestling. He didn’t even have the courtesy, the class, or the dignity to show up at the hearing, or to be represented. I told you what happens when you mess with me. I told ya I was gonna rid wrestling of André the Giant, and I did it!”

  “We thank you, Mr. Heenan, for that bit of, uh . . .”

  “Anytime I can deliver news like this, it’s my pleasure.”

  There was, of course, a legitimate reason for André’s “suspension” and diminished presence on World Wrestling Federation television. First and foremost was his deteriorating health. His acromegaly was affecting his back and spine at a rapid pace, causing him to walk slowly and with a significant stoop. The pain was so debilitating that André began wearing a back brace under his singlet, just to keep himself standing upright. Though his brute physical strength and indefatigable charisma were still unmatched, the mighty Giant was breaking down. However, this consummate professional was careful to keep his weakened condition from the fans. André became more and more detached from the real world, spending much of his time with the trusted fellow wrestlers with whom he didn’t need to fake better health.

  TIM WHITE “His health was getting worse. It was getting harder and harder for him to move. And he would never say how bad things were.”

  Some two months after André’s suspension, World Wrestling Federation began heralding the impending arrival of Japan’s hottest tag team. The masked Machines—Giant Machine & Super Machine—were coming to America to establish themselves as the number-one team in wrestling.

  One look at the seven-foot-four, 500-pound Giant Machine was enough for any fan to know who was hiding behind the black mask. The Machines gimmick had been originated the previous summer in New Japan Pro Wrestling. Under the aegis of manager Ichimasa Wakamatsu, André had teamed with “Super Machine” Bill Eadie (the name was a play on his “Masked Superstar” character) and “Super Strong Machine” Junji Hirata as the Machine Gun Army.

  In May, André went to perform in his final tour with New Japan Pro Wrestling. The tour’s historical highlight was a June 17 battle in Nagoya that saw André tapping out to an armlock by Antonio Inoki, said to be the Giant’s only career loss by submission. While in Japan,
André—that is, Giant Machine—also found time to sit down in a Tokyo teahouse to introduce himself and Super Machine to the fans.

  June 24, 1985: Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, NY

  “Mean” Gene Okerlund interviews the Machines in Japan.

  Okerlund—wearing his tuxedo, natch—enters a Tokyo teahouse. “I have finally found them,” he says, dropping to his knees at the table. “I cannot believe it, the Giant Machine and the Big Machine.”

  “No, no, Super Machine.”

  “The Super Machine, I beg your pardon, from Sapporo, Japan, weighing 130 kilo. And you of course, are the Giant Machine, at 220 centimeters tall and 230 kilo, is that correct?”

  “Hai.”

  “Yes, that is, that’s very high.”

  “Hai.”

  “Gentlemen, I cannot believe it, educated in English schools,

  The Machines.

  you’re very articulate apparently in the English language, I can’t believe it.”

  “Yes,” says Super Machine, “educated right here, the University of Tokyo. Master’s degree in education. Also, master’s degree in business administration.”

  “I see.”

  “He is also educated in the University of Tokyo.”

  “Tell me, the anticipation of the fans in the United States for the Machines, the Giant Machine and the Super Machine, your thoughts?”

  “We are. Very, very happy,” says Super Machine, selling the language gap. “About going to. Your country. It is an honor. A great honor for us. Because we have been told by our mentor, our stable-master, Wakamatsu-san . . .”

  “Ah,” nods Mean Gene.

  “... in order to be, not only good in your country, in order to be good in the world, you must go to United States.”

  “Number one,” agrees Okerlund, holding up a finger.

  “Number one,” translates Super Machine. “Ichiban.”

  “Ichiban. Right now, the two of you are number one in Japan, hopefully to be number one in the United States and the world.”

  “And the world, that is correct. We are also told, in order to be number one in the world, we must fight in World Wrestling Federation.”

  “In World Wrestling Federation. That too, gentlemen, ichiban. Very curious, any talk of a manager in the World Wrestling Federation?”

  “We have an adviser now, Wakamatsu-san, here in Japan. He has been in contact with one Lou Albano. . . .”

  Mean Gene pays rapt attention, a finger to his lips as he listens. “Oh, Captain Lou Albano! Yes! He’s very popular, very famous manager in World Wrestling Federation.”

  “Wakamatsu-san says Mr. Albano-san will take care of us, guide us, give advice....”

  “Oh, he’ll take care of you,” agrees Mean Gene. “Listen, I’m very curious, competition, in the United States, in World Wrestling Federation, have you heard about any of the competition there? It’s second to none.”

  “We challenge everybody,” says the Giant Machine.

  “Everybody.”

  “Including Hulk Hogan?”

  “Hogan-san,” nods the Giant.

  “Hulk Hogan-san, number one in world now,” says Super Machine.

  “Yes he is, ichiban. How about the Magnificent Muraco? I’ve got a couple for you, Big John Studd and King Kong Bundy, you’ve heard of them?”

  “Yes,” says Giant Machine. “Anytime. Anytime.”

  “Anytime . . . say, you know something? Your voice sounds familiar, and I get the distinct impression that I’ve met you someplace before.”

  “Never. Never. First time I see you.”

  “Perhaps you are mistaken,” says Super Machine. “We are very popular here in Japan, I’m sure you have seen us....”

  “Maybe in wrestling magazine,” suggests the Giant . . . erm, Machine. “. . . In magazine or on television.

  “Maybe I’ve seen you on TV or in a magazine here in Japan....”

  “Hai.”

  “It makes sense. That’s a good point, gentlemen, I thank you. We’re looking forward to seeing you in the United States as part of World Wrestling Federation, the Giant Machine and the Super Machine.”

  The Machines bow respectfully.

  “From Sapporo, Japan, and the island of Fu Yu Tu.”

  “Hai,” says the Giant.

  HOWARD FINKEL “Obviously you’re not going to hide who it was under a mask. But it was a novelty. It was hilarious. Everybody knew who it was. It was all designed to keep André in the mix. When you have a guy who is as tall as he was, you have to be innovative. You have to be creative. You have to try and keep this guy in the mix, because André was ours exclusively. We were national now, we weren’t regional anymore, so we had to come up with ways to keep him fresh.”

  Program 138, Summer 1986

  “GIANT MACHINE/SUPER MACHINE: NEW ENTRIES FROM JAPAN”

  Giant Machine is a mammoth piece of work. He stands about 7 feet 5 inches and weighs over 500 pounds. In his size, he resembles the... grappler from France, André the Giant, who has left the ring since he was suspended by the company for failing to show up for a match [with King Kong Bundy and Big John Studd]. This resemblance has not gone unnoticed. In fact, Bobby “The Brain” Heenan, manager of Stud and Bundy, has charged that if the Giant Machine were unmasked, he would be revealed as André.

  The Giant Machine denies the charge. He claims to be a graduate of Tokyo University and gives his home as the small northern island of Fu Yu Tu, once part of Japan but occupied by the Soviet Union since the end of World War II.

  October/November 1986

  NEW FROM JAPAN: THE GIANT MACHINE

  by Ed Ricciuti

  Like many other imports that threaten domestic competition, the Giant Machine has sparked a heated controversy. Typical of Japanese products, the Giant Machine seems patterned after an existing model that has long been a success in the ring. The immense frame of the huge masked wrestler bears an astonishing similarity to that of the veteran mat warrior from France, André the Giant, who has been suspended by President Jack Tunney for failing to show up for a match with Big John Studd and King Kong Bundy. Like André, the Giant Machine weighs upwards of 500 pounds. He has the same hamlike hands, massive, sloping shoulders, and legs like columns in front of a courthouse. Star commentator “Mean” Gene Okerlund noticed the similarity when he interviewed the two Machines in Tokyo shortly before they came to this country in August. The Giant Machine got rather testy at Okerlund’s suggestion that he was in any way similar to the Frenchman, and the commentator let it go at that.

  Heenan ... is convinced that under the black-and-silver mask that hides the face of the Giant Machine are features not of a Japanese, but of a Frenchman. Heenan gets livid every time he talks about it. “He’s no more Japanese than I am,” screams Heenan. “The Giant Machine is André. He’s so scared of Studd and Bundy he’s got to hide his ugly puss. We got that Frenchman out of wrestling, and now he’s trying to sneak back in disguise.”

  The Machines and their newly acquired manager, Captain Louis Albano (who, ironically, was André’s manager), have challenged Heenan’s team. “We know of Big John Studd and Bundy,” says Super Machine, who does most of the talking for the two Japanese. “They are huge and very good wrestlers, but we can beat them.”

  Super Machine, attempting to put Heenan’s charge about Giant Machine’s identity to rest, readily provides verbal biographies of the Japanese tag team. Super Machine gives his native city as Sapporo, on the northernmost large Japanese island of Hokkaido.

  Heenan, however, remains adamant. “Japanese?” he yowls. “No way. Jack Tunney should unmask those frauds. And if he won’t, Studd and Bundy will, in the ring. And then we’ll send the Machines to the scrap heap.”

  July 15, 1986: Mid-Hudson Civic Center, Poughkeepsie, NY

  Ken Resnick interviews President Jack Tunney & Bobby Heenan re: André.

  “Mr. Tunney, I understand that you have a clarification on the suspension of André the Giant.”

 
; “Yes, let me just explain something, Kenny,” says Tunney. “Suspending André the Giant was one of the worst things I had to do as president. However, I had no choice. He failed to appear for a couple of matches that he had contracted for. Also, he failed to appear for the hearing, which I really can’t understand, because

  The Machines, clockwise from left: Big Machine, Giant Machine, Super Machine, Capt. Lou Albano.

  André is not that type of man. Very dependable man, and great athlete.”

  “Obviously something unusual on the part of the Giant.”

  “Well, this is what I can’t... it doesn’t make any sense, really, because he’s just not like that.”

  Heenan barges in. “Mr. President, may I congratulate you on your decision. You have made my day. You have made my life. You talk about André the Giant, how he’s an honorable man. I told you about him, you shoulda listened to me! People shoulda listened to me. He chickened out, he backed out, he didn’t even have the gumption to show up for a hearing. And now he’s back, or he’s trying to come back, with somebody else as a partner, calling himself the Giant Machine. The Super Machine’s his partner. You know it, I know it, we all know it. That is André the Giant!”

  “They’re Japanese wrestlers,” replies Tunney, to Heenan’s disbelief. “They have Japanese passports, it’s ... could be Giant Baba.”

  “Mr. President, please. Don’t make yourself look bad in front of the people. That’s André the Giant. I know it. The man speaks like André the Giant. There’s no Japanese wrestlers seven-foot-five. You know that and I know it. Thirty of ’em aren’t seven-feet-five!”

  “Mr. Heenan, if you can prove that that’s André the Giant, I’ll suspend him for life.”

  “You mean if those masks come off, you will suspend him for life?”

  “Absolutely.”

  “Well, those masks’ll come off, I guarantee it. He shows one foot on this soil, he shows one face around this ring or anyplace, those masks are coming off. And I can guarantee that, ’cause I’m the Brain.”