‘Shut up and eat, you two are distracting me from the best pancakes in the world.' I frown at them both, picking up my milkshake to start washing away the food, trying to not feel uncomfortable with two pairs of adoring eyes aimed my way as they bond over their love of me. I never thought this would ever be a scenario I would be in the middle of. Especially not when we are in a plane two days ago.
‘I want yours.' Christian sulks, looking down at his own standard pancakes and maple and eyeing mine up woefully.
I will hurt you.' I warn with lowered brows, leaning over my plate with a poised fork in the stabbing motion, I catch Arrick smiling in the corner of my eye.
‘She will. I won’t help you either, I know what she can be like.' He laughs as Christian’s face drops more, his hand going to his brow dramatically.
‘Look, if you wanted same as me then you should have ordered the same as me. No one touches my food, not even him.’ I thumb Arricks way, which is only met with a smug smile from him as I am clearly pointing out that he’s special to me.
Stop grinning asshole. We all clearly know it.
‘True story dude… I on the other hand have no choice but to let her eat my food, cos she’s equally scary about that, and my life is worth more.’ Arrick winks my way, giving Christian a mock look of sympathy.
‘Some best friend you turned out to be, even Jenny gives me hers.’ He sulks a little, still adopting his drama queen pose of unfairness and getting lower in his seat as he slumps.
‘Ehh, I do not! A woman’s food is a sacred thing. Men have died for less.’ Jenny leans forward eyeing him up with a dead pan expression, scarily serious too. Having to stretch past Nate to see him as he leans back and slides an arm casually around her back.
‘I agree. Never touch a girl’s food, it’s pretty much like fucking her mom.’ Nate shrugs, looking in and all eyes dart to him.
‘That’s not even a comparison.’ I point out, brows almost touching my nose with the way his brain works and shaking my head at him, I catch Arry in the corner of my eye stifling a laugh at his best mates’ humour and elbow him in the ribs.
‘It kinda is.’ Arrick agrees, and both men do that whole agreeing with one another facial nod and solidarity bullshit. A reminder of why this is his actual best friend, even if at times I sometimes do not get it.
Arrick stretches his arms up and out before bringing them down, encircling my shoulder with one and squeezing me tight. Fly move for a player and I just sigh at his obviousness, yet leave his arm be. I’m feeling deflated and tired as hell and my appetite has nosedived as the intense fatigue takes over. I push my plate at Christian with a defeated pout.
‘Here, you can have them, I’m not hungry anymore.’ I sigh and rest my elbows on the table with a complete exhale of deflation, sad that I just did turn down my favourite thing to eat. Christian is delighted and dives straight in, pushing his own plate aside with relish and looking like he just won the lottery.
‘You okay?’ Arricks concerned tone in my ear has me turning to his worried expression and I just nod. He knows I rarely turn down food, especially not favourite foods.
‘Hungover, feeling like hell and badly needing sleep. I think I am going to go home and leave you all to it for a while.’ I lift my shake and take one last mouthful before tapping his thigh gently to tell him to let me out of the booth, he slides out obediently, never taking his eyes from me and I can see the utter disappointment in his face.
‘You want me to call you in a bit?’ He sounds wary, looks at me with an attempt of a smile but it doesn’t reach his eyes. I guess he hates the fact I am leaving, and I really hate the fact that he hates it. Part of me wants the space, but a huge part of me wants him alone with me. But I don’t want to stay here, I really need to lay down.
‘You could always come too, you said you needed sleep.’ I say softly, coyly and push past him to get out of the booth. I turn as I get free and notice he still has half a plate of food left too.
‘It’s okay, maybe you could come when you’re done eating.’ I add hastily, nodding at his plate and realising how stupid I must look right now. How sad and clingy.
‘I’m done… I’m coming now.’ He doesn’t hesitate, doesn’t attempt to get back in the booth either, just eyes fixed on me and then he turns to the others. Mind made up and maybe needing to be alone with me too. I know he probably isn’t done eating but I guess I should just accept the fact that he meant every word about being with me and he is trying so hard to convince me.
‘Right guys…. Breakfast was on me and I guess we will both see you all later.’ Arry looks at them with a smile, getting a round of grins in response from the best friends ever. He drops money on the table that covers the full breakfast and pushes Nate in the head who seems to have his eyes on Jenny’s cleavage.
‘Make sure everyone gets back, try not to lose them.’ He smirks and Nate only grins right back.
‘Pretty sure I can manage that.’
Chapter 10
The walk back is odd, we’re walking apart, my arms across my body as I just feel like being myself right now and not having the contact. I’m tired and feeling emotional and edgy. He’s trying to make idle chit chat, intent on keeping us talking about any topic he comes up with and I am responding, but I am fully aware of his constant fixed gaze on my profile as we walk and it’s starting to make me nervy. I can’t relax with the way he seems honed into my every movement and mannerism.
‘You can stop staring at me for like maybe five minutes.’ I point out and smile when his eyebrows dip in that cute way he has. He looks away for a minute and then back again.
‘You noticed huh?’ He acts coyly and shrugs my way. Not him at all, he’s always been super confident in every way and this just seems weird.
‘Just a little, you know…penetrating gaze latched onto my skull.’ I giggle at him, even more so with how sheepish he has become since I pointed it out and feel myself let go of the tension a little.
‘I can’t help it. ….. I spent months missing this view, dreaming about you, and I’m worried that if I look away you might disappear again.’ His tone immediately turns serious and his eyes, although still facing my way seem less zoned in on me and I relax a little.
‘I guess I know what you mean.’ I agree, knowing that I too am getting used to his sudden presence again and it still feels unreal and dreamlike. That the last months are some sort of alternate dimension now. He was in my head so many times in his absence that his real presence isn’t quite normal to me yet either.
‘I missed you……. I know it was my fault, but it doesn’t take away how much it sucked. You’re like a sunset to me, or a pretty view of a shoreline. Some people like art, they like watching the sea….. I have always liked looking at you. You have a unique kind of beautiful, the most breath-taking view on the planet.’ The seriousness of his statement makes my heart ache suddenly and tears prick my eyes, knowing fine well he means every word and I don’t know how to react. There’s a silent moment as we both look away, he clears his throat and I mess with my own fingers awkwardly. Affected by how sweet he can be and so genuine, still afraid to let him see that he gets to me though.
‘You’re so lame.’ I breathe out through intense emotional reaction, swallowing down tears and his laugh breaks the tension.
‘I missed that the most.’ He reaches out and pulls me to him by the upper arm and finds no resistance. Bending in cautiously and slowly moving in towards my mouth. I see it coming a mile off, the way his eyes focus on mine as though seeking permission before he kisses me softly. His nose rubs mine, his lips part slightly and I surrender to it, to him. Letting him feel me out as my eyes close of their own accord and Arry kisses me passionately.
My hands somehow end up cupping his sexy jaw, our bodies inching together so we touch in every way and his own hands are buried in the under the layers of my hair, angling so he can kiss me properly. It reminds me of the night Emma had Ava, only so much more intense and he doesn’t pull
away. He kisses me until a passing honk of a horn makes us break apart, giggling awkwardly when we realise we have probably been standing making out in full view for minutes. Oblivious to everything and the fact we are only a street away from our homes.
I am more than aware that the guy who never seemed to do any sort of public displays of lovey dovey’ness, just pretty much made love to my mouth in broad daylight.
‘You were made to kiss me, you know that right?’ He keeps me close, still nose to nose and tone low, still caught in the tender moment even if we are no longer lip to lip. I just nod, unable to formulate a reply while he looks at me exactly this way. Heart bounding crazily in my chest and knowing this look right here is what I have been aching for all along. A look that says, ‘I’m hopelessly yours.’ A look I never imagined I would see on his face, given so freely and so honestly.
‘I wish I could undo the past, but I can’t. I do not however, plan on making the same mistake ever again and losing this. You’re my everything Sophie. I finally know how it feels to kiss the girl you will only ever kiss again from here until eternity.’ He whispers breathily, and my insides fall apart, the last ounces of doubt that I don’t want this with him fall around me and my heart bleeds a little.
‘Don’t hurt me.’ I respond shakily, parts of me on show that I have been too afraid to let him near again.
‘I won’t…. I swear. Hurting you just hurts me too. I just want to make you happy.’
* * *
'Better lock my door, otherwise my friends may come crashing in on top of us when they finally show face.' I smile, stifling a yawn, very glad of the suggestion of some sleep. The sudden awakening this morning was bright and early and my body is crashing as much as his is, neither of us can stop yawning.
'On it.' Arrick lets me go and turns, walking across the plush carpet as he kicks off his sneakers. Getting to the door he locks it and heads back to my bed, taking a mini run and jump so he lands in the middle, star shaped. Looking like a child while doing so and beaming at me from his new position.
I giggle and walk a little more demurely, sliding off my own pumps, getting on my bed a little more gently, climbing onto my knees until I scoot closer to him. Arrick reaches out, catching my hand and tugs me over so I fall on top off him with a shocked yelp, followed by giggles as he catches me and rolls over on top of me, flattening me to the bed, pinning me down so he comes nose to nose with me, nestled against my body like a perfect fit. His eyes scan my face, the hint of a smile at the corner of his mouth and one dimple shining through, I can’t help but gaze right back into the depths of his eyes. Feeling completely, finally at ease and glimpses of mutual adoration shining through.
'I'm going home tonight on Jakes jet, I guess you three are too?' He rests his chin on my chest, so he can gaze up at me, shuffling his body down the bed a little. I nod, letting my fingers tail that perfect set of eyebrows, down that chiselled face to the perfect jawline slowly, following my progress and feeling his eyes watching mine.
'Come home with me Soph's, stay with me tonight at my apartment.' He watches me, frowning a little as I break into a smile, pushing him off so I can slide to my side to face him instead, his arms come around me, pulling me close so he can bring his nose back to mine. I guess letting him make out with me has brought back the hands on, ‘she’s never off limits to me’ side of him once more. I am not complaining, I missed this as much as I missed him, and it feels as right as it always did.
'I'll think about it.' I can’t help but smile as he begins rubbing his nose against mine, the way I have seen Jake do to Emma a million times and for a moment it’s weird to see what exactly is a Carrero trait, rather than a Jake or an Arry trait.
‘You’re going to leave me hanging and work for it?’ Arricks face turns serious, pushing his forehead against mine a little more. I push him away playfully and give him that knowing nod. Giggling at his crushed expression.
‘I don’t want to leave your side…. I spent months trying to imagine you beside me and now you’re here, I’m not ready to let you go home without me. I don’t want to be parted just yet.’ He loosens his hold a little and starts fiddling with a strand of my hair, twirling it between his fingers while watching me intensely.
'Who are you and what have you done with Arry?' I laugh, pushing him playfully and feeling more than a little smug when he hauls me back to him and wraps his legs around mine, so I can’t get away. Trapping me with sheer hunky muscle and that hard, perfect body, wrapping around mine.
‘He died of a broken heart. Lack of Sophie’belle.’ He pouts dramatically, fake sad eyes and the cutest frown.
‘Shut up you weirdo.’ I poke him in the dimple absentmindedly, aware that I am falling back into old habits a little too easily, some of our rapport coming back slowly. Repairing some bridges that only yesterday felt un-mendable.
‘See…This is exactly what I missed more than anything baby. Your sassy come backs when you like to make out you don’t even like me. It feeds my weird side and is becoming a borderline fetish.’ He leans into me closely and hits me with a chaste kiss on the corner of my mouth. A few more butterflies to add to my growing stomach full of them,
‘I don’t like you, I just feel sorry for you because you have no friends. I tolerate you because I am nice.’ I burst into giggles when he hauls me under him in a flash and starts torturing me with tickles. Crawling on top of me to straddle me and pin my arms down beside my head as I try to fight him off. He renders me immobile and ducks down to plant a kiss on my mouth, a little less safe and full on this time.
‘Come home with me…Or I will typewriter you until you agree.’ He warns with a smug look and I only shake my head at him. The inner child bursting out happily, all other thoughts and confusion giving me a break while he’s in boyish mood and I am smiling crazily.
‘You wouldn’t dare… You are trying to make me like you again, remember?’ I narrow my eyes at him, but he just looks back at me with a hint of mischief. Sexily naughty and that square jaw and straight brow makes him look a little sinister so suddenly, tingles pulsing over me instantly.
‘Yeah but we already ascertained that I’m an asshole who does stupid shit, sometimes.’ He grins wickedly, tucking my wrists under his knees as I fight back, with a look in his eye that he intends to carry out his threat.
Chapter 11
I inhale deeply as I wander into the middle of Arricks apartment from the elevator, he is following with our bags and dumps them by the end of the couch as I take in the open plan space. I haven’t been here in months and its sheer familiarity is making me feel at home, like coming home. Instantly still inside, like breathing warm soothing air and I inhale slowly. Welling up at how much I missed this place too. It smells like home cooked food, men’s aftershave, leather, books, and something familiar and clean. It’s a weird combination but it’s how it always smells, bringing back so many mixed memories.
Arricks apartment has always been a place I love to be, as it is so very him; modern mixed with traditional. Open plan and industrial, yet with old battered armchairs and new modern couches; a mix of old bookcases and steel framed shelves holding an array of books, decorative pieces and picture frames. Walls lined with both abstract art and photographic prints in an array of wood, metal and concrete frames. He has very male tastes, yet he is also a little eclectic.
His kitchen is all steel and dark wood, minimal, and usually immaculate, but I notice a box on the bunker and what appears to be a broken picture frame on the surface with a mess of glass spread carelessly across it. I move towards it impulsively, but he stops me with a hand on my shoulder, frowning at the sight of it and steps out in front of me to go towards it.
‘I’ll deal with it.’ He throws me a smile and leaves me to get myself comfy. Left to look around and reacquaint myself with my home away from home.
I pull off my coat and only half watch him picking up the pieces until he pulls the picture free, looks it over and then leans in to look over the box tha
t is sat open. He frowns harder and reaches inside, lifting out a book and dropping it back in.
‘Tasha. She was supposed to pick up what was left of her stuff and leave my key card back with Frank. Guess she was a lot more pissed than I gave her credit for.’ He drops the photo in the box and turns to open a cupboard to retrieve a brush and pan to clear up the mess. I wander over, eyeing up the broken mess and lean up to catch a glimpse inside the box. The picture is face up, a love portrait picture of Arrick and Natasha at a wedding or party, leaning in together to pose. I can’t say it doesn’t affect me, because it does. A horrible sick feeling and a wave of hurt that I try to push away.
Underneath is an assortment of things I recognise as Arricks, a sweater he wears a lot when he trains, and I have even worn on the odd occasion, a book, some DVD’s, a couple of t-shirts and some toiletries. I move away, not wanting to keep coming back to the picture staring up at me. Looking at the broken frame instead.
‘She broke this? Why?’ I lift my hand to touch the picture frame, to wipe away some of the shards scattered across it, but Arrick catches my hand in mid-air.
‘You’ll cut yourself baby, let me clear it up.’ He kisses my hand before moving it back and letting it go, moving to sweep off the pieces quickly. I watch him quietly, keeping my hands out of the way and trying to just let this go, let any talk of her go over my head.
‘My guess is she came here when she landed, and this is her way of telling me to go fuck myself. It wasn’t exactly pleasant this morning.’ He furrows his brow as he opens another cupboard and throws the pan contents in a concealed waste bin. Domestically capable and showcasing his pretty hot physique when doing anything manual, like bending and showing off an ogle worthy tight ass.
‘This was your picture?’ I can tell by the style of the frame that it matches ones he has in his bedroom, grey concrete looking frames, too masculine for the dainty pink and floral tastes of Natasha. I hate that she came here and broke something that belonged to him, even if she was in it too.
The Carrero Heart_The Journey_Arrick and Sophie Page 14