The Winter of Regrets

by Needa Warrant

  She felt a chill as she thought about last night and hoped like hell that man stayed far, far away.

  Veiko slipped up the back steps to Thrash’s apartment over the tattoo shop. He had keys to all the apartments but didn’t need to use them. He heard Thrash yelling and opened the door to the studio apartment Penny had rented, finding the door unlocked.

  Thrash was moaning and yelling in his sleep. Veiko could see his face was busted up badly. He went to the sink and got a glass of water, brought it back to the bed, and dumped half on Thrash’s head.

  His brother groaned and opened his eyes. “Veiko? The fuck! Gimme that water, I feel like shit.”

  Veiko handed him the rest, watching as Thrash painfully sat up. “What the hell happened to you?”

  Thrash handed him the glass back empty. “You’d never believe me if I told you, bro.”

  “Try me, because you got a lot of brothers looking for you. Calling Elena and getting wasted almost put us in a fight with Satan’s Attitude and Nefarious, asshole.” Veiko looked at his brother’s bloody shirt.

  “I was minding my own business. I forget what bar parking lot, but this fucking … shadow … attacked me. It wasn’t human. Told me Hunter sent him, I swear to God, Veiko. I don’t even remember what I said to Elena. How would that cause any problems?”

  Veiko looked at his older brother and became pissed off. “You were warned to leave Elena alone, weren’t you?”

  “Yeah, but you know how I feel about her, V.” Thrash pulled off his shirt. The bruises from last night were ugly and huge.

  “Whiskey is moving up numbers here in our area. He’s Satan’s Jersey president and he doesn’t want you bothering Elena anymore. Nefarious is backing him. I suggest you forget about her. Tramp is pissed off at you, bro. You’re going lose your colors if you don’t leave Elena alone.”

  Wincing as he moved, Thrash got up to go to the bathroom. Veiko wondered who in hell had been able to beat his brother so viciously. He didn’t want to be there when Bullet or Tramp finally found Thrash.

  “I suggest you lock the door and turn the TV on,” he told his brother through the door. “I’d avoid Tramp and Bullet, too. Don’t think you could take anymore bruising. Call me when you’re up to it.” He walked out then, making sure the door was locked behind him as he left.

  Elena never felt Whiskey come to bed during the night but she was in his arms when she woke up. She was wearing just a t-shirt and panties and remembered waking up and pulling her jeans and bra off. Whiskey hadn’t been in bed with her, but she was damn glad he was now.

  She pushed back into his warm body and wiggled her ass against him. She owed him for coming to her rescue and was ready to do whatever he wanted.

  “Elena, stop, you’re making me hard.” Whiskey sounded wide awake.

  “You don’t want me? I owe you for coming to help me,” she whispered.

  Whiskey moved away from her body. He sat up and looked at her. “Is that so? You think you owe me? I’m not like the scumbags you’ve had in your life, darlin’.”

  Elena didn’t know what to say.

  “We need to talk, Elena, so sit up and listen to what I gotta say.” He faced her. “I never want you to feel like you owe me anything. Not now, not ever. You’ve made me see there is more to life than partying and fucking. I did a lot of that after Shannon died. I left Deidra alone. I fucked up with Margo. I want a real relationship, now. I want to build something lasting with you.” He looked deeply into her eyes.

  “Whiskey, I haven’t been with a man since Hunter,” she whispered.

  “When it’s the right time, we’ll both know. You aren’t just a fuck, you’re so much more to me, darlin’. Waiting will be worth it, trust me.” He pulled her to him and kissed her passionately.

  A hard knock to the door ended their kiss. Whiskey got up and Elena admired his shirtless chest. His back was tatted and his arms were as thick as her thighs. He opened the door and stepped out, leaving her wet and wanting. Sighing, she got up and got dressed wondering why Rhiannon hadn’t woken her. Whiskey was on the phone and a biker was giving her daughter a bottle.

  “Oh my God, you should have woken me, I’m so sorry.” She reached out to take the baby.

  “Just call me Zero,” said the man. “I don’t mind babies, Elena. Whiskey wanted you to get your rest. I’m fine feeding Rhiannon.” He moved the baby so she could burp as he patted her back.

  Whiskey laughed and muttered, “Uncle Zero,” as he hung the phone up. “Elena, come sit at the table. The baby’s fine, and we need to talk.”

  Elena sat down and saw the cup of tea he must have made her. She wondered what he was going to say to her as she sipped it.

  “I noticed you have a trailer for your farm hands,” he pointed out. “Are you allowed more on the property?” He sipped his coffee.

  “Yes. We took the other two away because they’re in such bad shape. Why?” Elena wondered what Whiskey was getting at.

  “Zero was looking around and he said he thought there was a hookup for one close to the house. I was thinking, I can put a single wide trailer there. When we decide if we want to move in together, I’ll put two of my guys in it.” Whiskey watched her face closely.

  “Why wouldn’t you just stay in the house when you come up here?” Elena looked at him in confusion.

  “Well, things have changed and I’m moving to Jersey,” he explained. “I’ll be the state president and I need to have a few guys around me. I’d like to stay in the house when I bring Shanna over though.” His eyes hadn’t left her face.

  “Of course. I love Shanna and we can set up a crib for her, but you can move in with me. I think we’re sure this is what we want, Whiskey.” Elena was blushing.

  “I’m going to make sure this is what you want, Elena. I know you’ve been with a president, but Hunter was nothing like I am. Life is going to change but it will be for the better. I’ll help you with the bills and I’m opening a go-go bar. Zero will help run it so I can be home most nights.” He got up for more coffee.

  “It sounds like you’ve been planning this for a while,” she remarked, unsure what else to say.

  “Pretty much since the day I met you,” he confessed with a light smile. “Jack’s father told me about this bar, The Drop Inn, that’s going under. I had it checked out. I can afford it, so I’m buying it. I got a good deal on it and you can supply me with the dancers I need, right?”

  “Of course. I’ve got plenty of dancers.”

  “Good.” He took another sip, watching her over the rim of his mug.

  “I had no idea it was even for sale,” she admitted, trying to hide her shock. “I used to dance there. It’s a decent place, has good lunch business.”

  “I had a feeling you’d know the place. Anyway, I found a nice trailer and I can have it moved within days. I promised you we’d take this slow, and I keep my word.” Whiskey got up and put his cup in the sink. He turned and smiled at her. “You going to make me Thanksgiving dinner? Or would you like to go out to eat?”

  “I’d rather cook and have the babies home. I like leftover Thanksgiving Day sandwiches. I can ask Dee and Jack, but we need to talk about Lacy-Jane. I know Thorn and Tears will come, and maybe Kima and Veiko?”

  “Lacy-Jane will be doing a double at Dirty Deeds, I took care of that. I know she thinks Shanna should be hers, but that isn’t happening. I want to be close to all my girls. Invite anyone you’d like; I want to know your friends.” He cupped Elena’s face in his hand. “You happy, or am I moving too fast for you?”

  Elena took a deep breath. “I’m really, truly happy Whiskey.”

  “Good. You deserve to be. Now I’ve got to go out for a bit, but two of my guys are outside. They’ll come running if you need them, Roper and Rev are their names. Give me a kiss and don’t go anywhere without one of them, promise?”

  “I promise. I won’t even answer the phone until I know who it is. I do need to have Joy come down here, though. We’ve got bills to go over.
”

  “I’ll let them know to expect Joy. She lives over at the other house with Jersey, right?”

  “Yes, she does. I’ll see you when you get back.” Elena tilted her head for the expected kiss and felt tingles when his tongue met hers. She didn’t want him to leave, but knew better than to say so. Once he was gone, she twirled around the living room. Looking at Rhiannon, she picked her up and whispered into her hair, “We found the one, baby. I know he’s the one, and you’ll have a sister.”

  Putting Rhiannon back into the playpen, she looked out the window to make sure Joy was still home. She called her and asked her to come over. Only a moment later, Joy walked into the house and slammed the door. She had a frown on her face as she looked around the house.

  “Are any of them inside? I saw the two outside.”

  Elena raised a brow at her. “Do you have a problem? Nobody is inside and those two bikers outside are protecting my baby and me.”

  “From what? Elena, have you lost your mind? I don’t want Satan’s Attitude on this farm! You’re supposed to be with Thrash!”

  Elena rarely lost her temper with Joy. “Says who? I’m able to decide who I want in my life, Joy, and you need to keep your nose out of my business. I don’t want Thrash. I have a man. Get used to him.”

  The door opened and in came Jersey. He paid no attention to Elena, but looked at Joy. “I told you not to stick your nose in Elena’s life, Joy! Sorry, Elena. Seems my ol’ lady doesn’t know when to leave things alone.” He glared at Joy. “I told you when you left not to interfere, but damn it, I knew you would.”

  Elena felt her temper boiling over. “Both of you, sit down. I want you to hear this.” She went to the answering machine and turned up the messages Thrash left. She waited until every last message played before facing the pair of them again. “I don’t want a man like that. If you have a problem with Whiskey being here, move or ask Jersey to put in a road so you don’t need to come past my house. Thrash is never allowed on this farm again.”

  Joy twisted her face as she spat out, “Whiskey put you up to this, didn’t he?”

  Elena looked at her like she was out of her mind. “You’ve pushed and pushed, Joy. I’ll sell Moon Glow. Neither you nor Jersey ever made an attempt to give me any money for him or to make a date with the lawyer. Remember, I own most of this farm. You put down very little and you haven’t paid a feed bill here in months. You’re always at the track with the horses. I pay that bill too! I can get Whiskey to buy you out.”

  She was bluffing but it worked.

  “I work the horses there so we can win,” Joy fought back, her face turning red. “How can you expect us to live on this farm now with them?”

  Jersey grabbed Joy’s arm. “Shut the fuck up, Joy. Elena, I had no idea Thrash was calling you. I wish you’d told me. I didn’t know about the feed bills, either. I warned her to stay out of your business.”

  Joy pulled away from Jersey and yelled at Elena. “Thrash was drunk, Elena! We all do stupid things when we’re drunk! How can you be with a man like Whiskey?? You’re being very stupid.”

  Elena cheeks were flaming. “I know Whiskey’s past, Joy. We talked, and whatever he did in Maryland isn’t going to haunt me. Not like all the dancers I know Thrash fucked. If you want Thrash so bad, leave Jersey and go be with him.” She turned and looked Jersey in the face. “Sorry, but your ol’ lady seems to have a thing for Thrash. As of today, no Bound for Hell members are allowed here. I don’t want to see them except for you, Jerz.” She faced Joy again. “When you pay some of the feed store bills, come talk to me. Start deciding which track horses we’re selling. I’m done paying for them. Now get out of my house, and I mean it.”

  Jersey hated this chick shit. “Joy, go home.”

  Joy gave one harsh look at Elena, then stormed out of the house, purposely slamming the door and making the house shake.

  When she was gone, Jersey sighed. “Elena, please let me talk to you.”

  “Veiko and Nailz can come here,” said Elena at once, “but I don’t want the others. I’m sorry, Jersey. I think you need to put a road that goes directly to your house.” She looked him square in the face. “I mean it about the track horses. Joy hardly dances and I do all the real work here.”

  Jersey nodded, upset about Joy yet trying hard to appease Elena. “I’ve offered to pay for things here,” he said. “I’ll get a road in. I can use the beginning of the lane and branch off of it without taking any pasture. There’s already a trail there. Will that work for you?”

  “I can’t believe Joy would jump on me like she did,” Elena said, clearly bothered still, even with Joy not in the room. “Here I am, finally happy, and then she is trying guilt me into being with Thrash. I don’t want a member of Bound for Hell! I’ve hated your club ever since Rabid forced Kima.”

  “Elena, I understand,” he said, “and I still feel like shit over that. Joy thinks she knows what’s best for you. You know she loves you like a sister. We’ll work this out.”

  Whiskey had come in quietly, neither of them knowing he’d come in. “Work what out?” he asked, startling them. “Elena?” He looked Jersey up and down with a mean look on his face.

  Elena looked at the man she was falling in love with and refused to lie for Joy or Jersey. “Joy’s mad that I don’t want Thrash. Whiskey, this is Jersey, he’s a good friend and Joy’s ol’ man.” She wasn’t sure what all that Whiskey might have overheard. “He’s trying to make things right.”

  “Is that so? I’ve made an enemy so soon? I usually do.” He pushed his long hair back and stared at Jersey. “Better straighten your ol’ lady out. I don’t see why we all can’t live here.” He extended his hand to Jersey, who shook it. The tension seemed to cool down a bit.

  Jersey knew who Whiskey was and knew damn well that the man was a killer. He wasn’t going to argue with him and had been informed earlier about Satan’s Attitude moving into the area. He was no fool; he’d find a way to get along with Whiskey.

  “I was explaining to Elena that I can put a road in at the top of the lane so my club doesn’t pass the house. Also, I’ll pick up the feed bills that Joy should have been paying. I don’t normally concern myself with the farm.” He kept eye contact with the man and he meant every word he said.

  Whiskey looked past him at Elena. “You good with that, darlin’? I don’t intend to get into running the farm either, but I will if I’ve gotta. Jersey, you understand that Thrash isn’t welcome on any part of this farm.”

  Elena didn’t want any friction between the two men, but she wanted to make a point. “I’m not good with you paying bills that Joy should’ve been paying. As for the road, yes, that’s good with me. Keep your club away from my barns, my horses, and my house. Tell Joy to get her ass dancing to pay her share, too.”

  Whiskey didn’t blink an eye, but was glad Elena spoke her mind. He watched Jersey for a sign of weakness and didn’t see any.

  “I can live with that. Whiskey, I’m not happy with Thrash either. I’ll get on Joy’s ass. Trust me. Elena, you didn’t really mean you’d sell Moon Glow out from under us, did you?”

  Elena looked at him like he was crazy. “As of now, we have no deal on him. I own most of him. Remind her of that, too. He doesn’t leave my barn. Tell Joy that I mean it, she went too far. I’ll sell this place and she can’t buy me out. I don’t need a meddling bitch in my life.”

  Jersey figured it was time to go. With a nod to Elena, he made up his mind to talk with Joy and left without another word.

  Once the door shut, Whiskey pulled Elena protectively into his arms. His lips claimed hers and she pushed her tongue against his. Kissing Whiskey was something Elena was getting addicted to. His good clean smell of leather turned her on so much.

  Finally, Whiskey broke the kiss and looked into her eyes. “You having any regrets, Elena? I know that this won’t be easy for you with your friends in other clubs. This is why I want to take it slow, for both of us. I need to be a better man for you … a
nd for myself.”

  “No regrets,” she said with a smile. “I don’t like many in Bound for Hell. Joy doesn’t know you and … and how dare she tell me what I can do with my life! You’ve been honest with me. I know who and what you are. Maybe not all of you, but there are parts I don’t ever want to know.” She stared right back at him and let him lead her to the couch.

  “Kima was the chick Rabid was with when he disappeared, wasn’t she?” Whiskey toyed with her hair and Elena knew he wanted the truth as much as she would tell him.

  Elena sighed. “Yes, but how do you know about that?”

  Whiskey kissed the tip of her nose. “It’s my business to find out what the other clubs are doing. We’ve dealt with Rabid. Kima’s Jack’s sister?”

  “Yes. It was so horrible, what happened to her. I was there when Kima and Rabid came. I’ll never know how Kima lasted so long with that monster, but it ended that day.” She didn’t know why she was confiding in Whiskey, but the weight seemed to lift as she spoke those words. “That’s why I hate Bound for Hell so much.”

  “I need to know if there are any bodies buried here, darlin’. I don’t want to go down for a crime I didn’t commit.”

  “Not that I know of,” she admitted. “It didn’t happen here; it was at Hunter’s and there’s no body. None of Bound for Hell could find a way to save her. Hunter called him and, as part of joining Bound for Hell, he offered the Lodge to get Rabid down here.” She wrapped her arms around Whiskey. “I helped Kima, you know. I gave her a gun so she could end that motherfucker herself. Kima has never been the same, either. She pretends everything’s fine, but I know her too well.”

  “Elena, listen to me. If ever there comes a day that the cops ask you about Rabid, you tell them Hunter was the last one to see him. Hunter is dead, you know nothing. You need to tell Kima that, too.”

  From the sound of Whiskey’s dead-serious tone, Elena pushed herself away to look into his face. She was scared now.