New Beginnings

by Megan Keith

  Seth

  She doesn’t look upset in the slightest about this Dean fellow. I want to ask her where Matt fits into all of this but I don’t. I don’t know where our boundaries lie. If we’re just friends do I have any right to know about her love life? Navigating this friends thing is more complicated than I thought.

  “Sometimes I just wish I could just go back to being a kid again. Life was just so easy then, hey?” I voice my thoughts.

  “We can.” She leans forward with her eyebrows raised. “I’ve got an idea. You ready to go?”

  “Sure.” I stand and pull my wallet from my pocket.

  B scrunches her nose on a mischievous smile before I go inside to pay. Just what is she planning?

  ***

  “Let’s go back another way. I want to show you something,” she says excitedly, pulling on my arm and then looping hers through it, as we reach the edges of a lush green park. I don’t care which way we go as long as it takes longer for me to drop her home. I’m enjoying her company too much.

  She doesn’t let go of my arm as we stroll down the meandering path through the large shady trees. The dappled sunlight highlights the golden hues of her hair and I find my fingers longing to touch it. I put my free hand in my jeans pocket to stop myself from doing just that. She stops when we round a bend and the path gives way to soft green grass. The trees open up to a playground, which is surprisingly empty considering the pleasant Sunday afternoon weather.

  “You said you wanted to be a kid again so…” she pulls her arm from mine, kicks off her thongs and runs away, yelling, “YOU’RE IT!”

  It takes me a moment of head shaking to realise she’s for real and already on the other side of the playground. I run after her but I don't even get close before she’s heading off in a different direction. After a couple of minutes of running back and forth I finally get a hold of her. My arms wrap around her waist and I pull her to me. We’re both breathing heavily and our bodies are pressed against one another so I can feel her every inhale and exhale, her warmth, smell her light flowery perfume … I suddenly realise how inappropriate it is for her to still be in my arms when the game is already finished and I let go. She turns to me with an unreadable expression that slowly morphs into a huge grin.

  “I can’t believe I got some head honcho business techy nerd to run through the park and play tiggy with me.”

  “Today I’m not some ‘head honcho business techy nerd’ I’m a kid, remember? I’ll race you to the slide!” I call over my shoulder as I break into a run. She gasps loudly and then bolts after me. I get there first though.

  “No fair! You cheated. You had a head start,” she grumbles breathlessly.

  “You’re such a sore loser!” I reply just as breathlessly before climbing the ladder and taking a seat at the top.

  “Am not!” She huffs and crosses her arms over her chest, in a false angry tone. All that really achieves is offering me up a perfect view of her ample cleavage from where I’m sitting. I swallow hard and avert my eyes. Inappropriate.

  “You coming?” I ask. Again with the inappropriate.

  She returns my smile with a breathtaking one of her own before she moves to the back of the slide and begins to climb the ladder. I slide down. It doesn’t take long; I guess I’ve grown a little since I was last in a playground. When she reaches the top I peek back up at her. She tries to sit gracefully which is near impossible in a dress so short. She adjusts her small bag so that it sits on her lap before pushing off down the slide. I can’t help but stare as her dress rides up her thighs as she goes. White cotton knickers. Who would’ve thought playing around like a couple of kids could be so thrilling?

  “Have a good perv, did ya?” she asks with a smile so wide it does things to my insides. Her cheeks are red when she rights herself in front of me and tugs her dress back into place then adjusts the thin strap of the bag on her shoulder.

  “Yep.” I laugh sheepishly.

  “Just for that, you owe me a push on the swing.”

  “Do I?”

  “Yep.” She shoves my chest and walks away and I follow. Of course I follow.

  She seats herself and waits for me to stand behind her. I put my hand on the centre of her back and push gently, stepping further back as the swing gains momentum.

  “Higher!” she calls.

  I push her harder and revel in every single touch of my hand to her warm back. I push her for a solid five minutes without a sound but the birds and the soft whooshing as Bianca flies through the air, both of us lost to our thoughts. Eventually I get tired of pushing and I take a seat in the swing beside her. I watch her gliding up and down, her almost-golden hair flying behind her.

  “Did you play here when you were little?” I ask, pushing my feet against the dirt as Bianca’s swing comes to a slow stop.

  “Not often.”

  “You said you wanted to show me something-”

  “Oh, I forgot!” She turns her head this way and that as if to get her bearings. “Over there.” She points to a bench seat and starts walking towards it. When we come to a stop in front of it she searches the ground. “Here. This is my little stamp on history right here. I haven’t looked at this for years.” She taps her foot on the pavers under her. I step closer and look down to her feet. There are a heap of bricks that have been cemented around the bench seat, each of them decorated. In the centre is a plaque commemorating the opening of the playground in 1996. “This is me.”

  Bianca bends slightly and points to a red brick that’s engraved with ‘Bianca Summers, age 7’. Underneath the name is an engraved picture of a sun, a flower and a stick figure girl wearing the typical triangle shaped dress that kids draw. I smile as I think of what Bianca would have been like as a little girl. I bet she was adorable.

  “I can see the resemblance.”

  “Oh yes, as you can see I still rock the triangle dress,” she says, lifting the corners of her dress out sideways and doing a curtsy.

  Oh, yes you do. When her eyes widen and her cheeks darken I realise that I actually said that out loud. “Sorry,” I mumble as my cheeks get hot.

  “Don’t apologise. It’s the truth.” She quickly recovers with a giggle that makes me like her even more.

  When we get back to her house she invites me in for a drink. I wait in her lounge room while she heads down the hall to the kitchen. Her house is one of those terraced brick homes that are attached to one another, a really long hallway runs the length of it and all the rooms are off to the right. It could do with a repaint but it’s full of character with high ceilings and decorative cornicing. The front room is massive, with a chandelier light and ceiling rose, the fireplace is the centre focus of the white walled room with its dark wood that’s carved.

  “Your house is amazing. I love all the space you have. You know, I reckon my whole apartment could fit in this room alone,” I tell Bianca when she returns to the lounge room. She hands me a can of Coke and sits on the couch.

  “Really?”

  I sit beside her. “I think so, yeah.”

  “Huh.” She repositions herself on the couch so she’s angled towards me. “So let’s play a game. A friendly round of questions.”

  “Okay.”

  “We’ll take it in turns but we can’t ask the same question twice.”

  “Sure. So, um, what-”

  “Hey! I didn’t say you could go first!” She smacks me on the arm.

  “So?” I laugh. I love how playful she is.

  “What’s your favourite colour?” she asks.

  “Blue,” I answer automatically as I stare into her blue eyes. Their hue is spectacular, so unusually bright and mesmerising. Yep, right now blue is my absolute favourite colour.

  “Your turn,” she prompts after a moment of silence and I realise I’m still staring at her.

  “Right, um … Favourite food?”

  “Easy. Pizza.” She grins. “Favourite movie?”

  “Garden State.”

  “Ooh, good on
e.”

  “Favourite book?” I ask.

  “Hmm, that’s tough. I have like fifty favourites, I couldn’t possibly choose.” She catches my eye. “What? I read a lot! Only a compulsive reader would understand.”

  “I read. I get it. Don’t answer.”

  “Good. I won’t.” She pokes her tongue out at me. “My turn. Pet peeve?”

  It takes me a moment to recover from the sight of her tongue before I think of an answer. “You know what I find really annoying? Labels.”

  “Labels?” She frowns and leans forward to place her can of soft drink on the table.

  “Yes, labels. When you buy something, like a new mug or cd, and you can’t get the sticky label off.”

  “I know what you mean! I hate that.”

  “You have to scrub and scrub, or pick them off with your fingernails. I feel like writing to these companies to inform them there’s such a thing as ‘removable labels’ and that they should try them!”

  She starts giggling.

  “What?”

  “Wow! You take your hate of labels seriously!”

  “I don’t hate them, I just hate that manufacturers…” She starts laughing harder and I lose concentration.

  “Go on! This is riveting stuff,” she says through her laughter.

  “Now you’re just making fun of me. At least I don’t have a movie ticket book.”

  “Hey! That reminds me! You still owe me an embarrassing fact.”

  “Nope. My turn to ask a question. How long have you known Ben and Scar?”

  “A little over a year. Since Scar hired me. I met Ben maybe a week after that.” I open my mouth to speak but she cuts me off. “So now, tell me something embarrassing about yourself.”

  “That’s not a question.” She only raises her eyebrow at me. I guess she’s not going to let that go. “Something embarrassing. Right. Um … I’m embarrassed to admit that when I put Johnno in that head lock the other night I was shit-scared. I’ve never even been in a punch up before and they’re a bunch of scary looking blokes. I had no idea what I was doing.”

  “Huh! I never would have guessed that. You looked so confident.”

  “I definitely didn’t feel it at that moment.”

  Bianca

  “I’m impressed. I admire when a man can admit to not being so tough.” It was kind of hot actually, the sudden thought surprises me.

  “So if I told you that I sometimes cry when I watch a sad movie, that would impress you?”

  “No, that’s super embarrassing!” Not. Wow! I’m liking this guy more and more.

  “Ha ha, then I won’t admit to that.”

  “Too late.” I give him a wink. “Next question. Have you ever been in lo-”

  “My turn.” Seth cuts me off. “Have you ever been in love?”

  “What? I can’t believe you stole my question!”

  “It wasn’t your turn.” He smirks at me.

  “But-”

  “Just answer the question, Bianca.” He kicks that smirk up a notch and I give in.

  “Fine,” I say with a huff and an eye roll. “No. Tried to convince myself that I was on a couple of occasions. But no, I haven’t ever been in love … love the idea of it though. I want to be swept off my feet. I want to be taken by surprise with romantic gestures. I want to find my soul mate.” I want to find a muzzle for my mouth. Again. My face is red with embarrassment and I find it hard to look at him, though I’m not sure of my exact reasons. “How about you?” I ask, focusing on the condensation dripping down my can of soft drink where it sits on the table.

  “You can’t ask me that.”

  My eyes whip in his direction. “But-”

  “That question has already been asked.” He winks at me and when I move forward to shove him, or slap him I’m not too sure, he puts his hands up in surrender. “Hey, don’t blame me! I’m not the one that made up the rules.”

  “You shit!” I cross my arms and sigh. “Longest relationship then?” I try for a bored tone that comes out more like disgruntled.

  “Besides my parents?” He laughs.

  “Smart arse!”

  “Two years.”

  “Really? You must have loved her.”

  “I see what you did there. Sneaky.” He crosses his arms, matching my position. Just when I think he’s not going to say anything more his face turns serious and he starts: “At the time I thought I was in love with Rebekah, and looking back I know that I did love her but I wasn’t in love with her, you know what I mean? Beck and I were comfortable with each other, I guess. She’s one of my closest friends. She’s actually marrying my best mate next month.”

  “What?”

  I watch him casually drink his Coke. He takes his time, happy to make me wait, before he says, “Yeah, true story.”

  “And you’re okay with that?”

  “More than okay. I’m really happy for them both.”

  “Wow!” I collect my can from the table and take a sip while I process the information.

  “It is a bit ‘wow’ I suppose. Beck and I were over years ago though. In fact, I’m going to be Kev’s best man.”

  “No way!”

  “Yes way!” he mimics.

  “Wow!” I don’t know what else to say. If I wasn’t already beginning to realise just how special a guy Seth is, that would have been a defining moment. How is it possible he can be so easy-going when I’d thought he was uptight? How can he be so fun and casual, sexy … oh god! I’m distracted by those eyes again! My eyes linger on his chocolate ones and I suddenly feel very self-conscious and quickly look away.

  We settle into an awkward silence, both of us concentrating on our drinks. It’s the most uncomfortable I’ve felt all day, well besides when he walked in here and caught me singing and dancing.

  “You don’t know how good it is to finally have someone to hang out with on the weekend, B. I’ve lived here for months but until now I haven’t known anyone,” he quietly admits.

  “What about the people you work with?”

  “They’re … just the people I work with.” He shrugs. “I’m their boss and they’re a bunch of computer nerds.” I laugh. “Then there’s my boss, Jim, he’s just weird.”

  “You’d fit right in then, with all the nerds and weirdos!” I joke.

  He rolls his eyes at me and after a moment of silence he continues, “Sundays are the worst, I dread them. Sometimes I try to sleep them away so it’ll be Monday already. Sad, isn’t it? I look forward to Mondays. I’m probably, like, the only person on the planet.” He chuckles humourlessly.

  “That is sad. That should have been your embarrassing story.” I nudge him with my hand against his forearm. The heat lingers on my skin long after the touch does. “What about Saturdays? What did you do yesterday?”

  “All the mundane stuff I don’t have time for during the week.”

  “Such as?”

  “Cleaning my apartment, doing laundry, groceries …”

  I can only imagine how hard it must be to move to a new city on your own. It makes me feel terrible for the way I’ve treated him since I’ve met him, when all he wanted was to make connections with new people. It also makes my earlier embarrassment, being caught dancing, seem trivial.

  “Anyway, I suppose I’ve taken up enough of your Sunday arvo. I should probably get going. Let you continue your star performance while you clean,” Seth says, as if he’s read my mind.

  “Ugh, please don’t remind me. That’s twice you’ve caught me now!”

  “It is.” He chuckles and my cheeks heat in embarrassment again. I watch him place his empty can on the coffee table and stand. “Thanks for hanging out with me today. I had fun.”

  “Me too.” I stand beside him and follow him to the front door, feeling reluctant to say goodbye.

  “B, I…” He turns to face me and I can feel the electricity in the air between us while we stand closely in front of my now open front door. He swallows awkwardly. “I’m glad we can be friends.”r />
  “Ah, yeah, me too,” I stutter. Though why the word friends is suddenly so offensive to me I’m not sure.

  “I guess I’ll see you at the café tomorrow then.” He gives me one last smile before turning away and walking down the path. I watch him climb in his car and we wave at each other before he drives away.

  When I close the door I lean my back against it, close my eyes and let out a longwinded sigh. His smile lingers behind my closed lids and my lips curve in response. What am I doing? When I met him I was so determined not to like this guy and now I can’t, for the life of me, remember my reasons why.

  Seth

  I need coffee. Little sleep has had me feeling grumpy all morning. I was late to the office, so I didn’t get a chance to grab a coffee before work. I’ve been busy all day, so I’m relieved to be heading to the café for my much needed caffeine hit and a bite to eat.

  When I open the door the delicious aroma of coffee and food fills my senses but my attention is side-tracked to Bianca. Instead of going to the counter I walk towards her. She’s delivering a couple of plates to a table in the back corner of the room and all thoughts of my much needed caffeine fall away when my desire is to get a fix of her instead.

  She spots me straight away and she gives me that dazzling smile she normally would have withheld from me. Before yesterday. Yesterday changed things. Last night I tossed and turned while thoughts of Bianca swirled in my head. I thought of Emma too, and I wondered how on earth I could be attracted to Bianca so strongly and quickly, when I’d had such a hard time letting Emma go. I don’t want to be attracted to Bianca when she doesn’t want anything more than friendship from me. Been there, done that.