Damaged - Jacinta's Story (Destiny Series Book 3)

by J. L. Perry

  Cass and I glance at each other and giggle. Again, poor Connor. The actual act of sex is something we’ve never discussed with each other. I know he sleeps around, but it’s not something I dwell on. I really don’t want to think about what he’s actually doing in bed. Ewww! That’s just gross.

  ****

  Cass waltzes into my bedroom later in the evening. She’s already dressed and ready to go. I’m still putting the finishing touches on my makeup.

  “Oh hell no.” She glares, first at what I’m wearing, and then at my face.

  “What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?”

  “You’re dressed like you’re going to fucking church,” she snaps.

  “I like this outfit.” I protest.

  “It’s fine if you want a peck on the cheek at the end of the night. If you want to get ravaged by a man and experience multiple orgasms, you’re going to need to wear something different. You have to wear something sexy. Show off your curves.”

  I burst out laughing. I can’t stay mad. I stomp to my wardrobe and fling back the door. “What do you suggest I wear?”

  “I’m not going to waste my time going through that. I’ll be right back. I have the perfect dress for you to wear.”

  “What’s wrong with my clothes?”

  “Nothing if you’re having brunch with the Queen.”

  I giggle at her comment. She’s such a bitch sometimes.

  ****

  “No way!” I screech as I peer at the slutty stranger in the mirror. “My tits are hanging out everywhere.”

  “If you want to get fucked tonight, you’re going to have to tramp it up a bit.”

  “I don’t want to look like a tramp.” Tears burn my eyes. “I really don’t want to get laid either. The thought of being alone with a strange man terrifies me.” Cass pulls me into her arms.

  “Oh honey, you don’t look like a tramp.” She strokes my hair soothingly. “You look sexy as hell. You have a killer body, and tits I’d die for. I want you to show off a bit of what mumma gave ya for once.”

  I take another glance in the mirror. The white dress is skin tight. It has a deep, plunging neckline and it’s short—really short. I’ve never worn a dress this short before. I don’t feel comfortable in it and there’s no way I’ll be able to bend over. I sigh loudly. I know she’s going to convince me to wear it.

  “I hate you sometimes.” I slide my feet into my sky high, white designer heels.

  “Get over it, bitch. You look smokin’ hot! If I was into women, I’d do ya.”

  ****

  I keep sneaking a glance at Connor on the drive to the club. I feel guilty about ditching him. I’m glad his friend Mason called and invited him to go to the pub for a few beers.

  He slows the car to a stop at the front of the club and I kiss his cheek before reaching for the door handle.

  “Be careful tonight Jaz,” he whispers.

  As I slide from the car, I promise him, I will be. As pushy as Cass is, I trust her to never lead me into a dangerous situation.

  “Call me if you need me.” I know he worries about me.

  There’s a short line outside Lush. That’s the name of the club. Cass and I join the end of the queue. The place is wall to wall with bodies when we finally make it inside. It’s so crowded. I hate crowded. It’s dim and loud, but the atmosphere is amazing. Lush is a fitting name. It could describe both the décor and the people that frequent it. This is obviously the local hangout for all the beautiful people. I’m beginning to understand why Connor loves this place.

  Cass grasps my hand and pulls me towards the bar. Guys grab my arse as we thread our way through the crowd. They are actually groping my ass! I hate being groped, I whip my head around and snarl. Cass, on the other hand, is smiling and winking at every squeeze. This is what she’d refer to as a smorgasbord or hot guy heaven. Shit, I wish she hadn’t talked me into wearing this dress.

  Cass orders our drinks while I lean against the bar and evaluate the interior. The décor is beautiful; black, silver and white, with splashes of colour here and there. It’s very tastefully decorated. The bar stretches the entire length of one wall. There are more than enough bar staff, so it doesn’t take long for our drinks to be served.

  Cass purchases a bottle of expensive wine and four shots of tequila. I carry the bottle of wine and the glasses while she balances the tray of shots. We are lucky enough to secure a vacant table. After setting the wine, glasses and shots down, we plonk ourselves in a chair.

  Thankfully, the table we choose is away from the dance floor and music, but we can still barely hear each other when we speak. To our left, people are making out on some comfy looking black, leather sofas. There’s a couple practically doing it right in front of us. Gross.

  I pour us both a glass of wine and Cass places two shots and two lime wedges in front of me. After licking our hands, she sprinkles on salt. She holds up the first shot to make a toast, a mischievous expression crosses her face. “To a wild night of fun and steamy hot sex.” I quickly down my tequila and suck on the lime wedge. Shit, why did she have to mention the sex bit?

  The thought of going home with a strange man makes me feel sick to the stomach. Why do I let her talk me into these things? I know it’s time to let go of my virginity, but I’m not sure if I can go through with it tonight.

  Or ever, actually.

  “I don’t know if I can go through with it,” I admit, as dread washes over me.

  “Jaz,” she growls.

  Crap, I know there’s a lecture coming.

  “Of course you can. The first time is the worst but it gets soooo much better after that. I reckon, the first time should be with someone you don’t know, and will never see again. Don’t even tell him your real name, and whatever you do don’t give him your phone number. I won’t let you go home with just anyone, I promise. So, drink up bitch and let’s go find us some studs.”

  I giggle at her last remark, but I still feel sick inside. I cross my fingers under the table so she can’t see them. I hope and pray, no man comes along that meets with her approval. As the seconds become minutes, I’m becoming more and more frightened.

  The shots are gone and we are onto our second glass of wine. We’re laughing and having fun. As the effects of the alcohol begin to take hold, I become calmer. After gulping our wine, we make a decision to hit the dance floor. This is my favourite part of clubbing.

  The dance floor is massive and crowded. There isn’t much room but I let the rhythm of the music take over as I dance. I love the feeling that flows through me when I dance. It makes me feel free and alive. Before long, a couple of guys join us on the dance floor. They’re cute, but not my type. Do I even have a type? Cassie is flirting with them. She is always so confident around men, my bestie has no shame.

  We dance for a few more songs, before breaking for more drinks. The dancing is killing my buzz. I need to keep the buzz going if I have any chance of going through with my one night stand. Fuck, just thinking about it again is making me ill.

  ****

  Mason

  One of Blake’s friends from school has invited him to spend the night. It’s his very first sleepover. I didn’t think he’d want to go, but he was very excited when I dropped him off. I reassure him, if he changes his mind and wants to come home, he only has to call me.

  “Okay dad,” he says as I accompany him to the door.

  I know the father a little. I’ve spoken to him a number of times at the school and he seems like a nice guy. He’s also a single parent. Having this in common has helped us click. His wife died a few years ago. Blake confided he was looking forward to sleeping over, because there is no mum living there. It breaks my heart to know that’s how he feels. I wish my mother or Betty were still alive. They would have helped him to understand that not all females are bad.

  It’s hard leaving him in someone else’s care. Fucking hard. I’ve become fiercely protective. I’ve grown so used to having him around I love the little guy so
much. He’s part of me now and I feel lost without him.

  When we get to the door I squat down to his level. “I love ya buddy.” I hug him and ruffle his hair.

  “Love you too dad.” He looks into my eyes and smiles and it warms my heart. I never thought I’d like being called dad, let alone being one. But, I love it.

  I feel sick to the stomach as I drive away. I’ve been riding a rollercoaster of emotions since becoming a parent. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy that Blake seems to be moving forward with his life, but I worry about him constantly. He’s adjusting to his new life well. I’m so proud of him, he’s making friends and seems happy enough.

  I didn’t want to go home, I would only sit and fret about Blake, so I call Connor to find out what he’s got planned. It’s been a while since I’ve had a night out with the boys. Blake’s arrival ensured the nights out and partying stopped. I haven’t even had a fuck. It’s the longest I’ve been without sex. Ever.

  Two days without a fuck was considered a dry spell for me. Now, here I am, three months later. Fuck I need to get laid. One way or another, tonight I plan on getting some action.

  I’ve managed to pack up most of our stuff in the house, ready for our big move next week. I’m looking forward to moving but I hope and pray, the change won’t be too much for Blake. I’ve talked with him about it, numerous times. He’s been through so much in his short life and I don’t want to add to his stress. I was stoked the other day when he hugged me and said, “As long as we are together dad, I don’t care where we live.”

  He’s such a sweet kid. He’s the best! I assured him, he’ll always be with me. No matter where we live, we’ll always be together. I was rewarded with a heart melting smile.

  Connor had no plans for tonight, so we arranged to meet at the pub down the road from his apartment. He’s was there when I arrived. It’s great to catch up and spend time with him.

  While we play a few games of pool and drink a few beers, we organise a card night for the end of the following week. He invited me to bring Blake along and said his sister would amuse him while we play. I express my concern about Blake’s nervousness around women.

  “Jaz is the sweetest person you could ever meet. I promise he’ll be fine and you’ll be there if he feels insecure. She had a really tough childhood which is the reason she studied to become a Child Psychologist. She wants to help other kids who went through what she did growing up. I’m sure he’ll love her. They can watch a movie or play the X-box.”

  Connor has me looking forward to meeting his sister. It’s obvious he idolizes her, he never stops talking about her. I’m happy that Connor and his dad found happiness after his mother’s death.

  We hung out at the pub for a few hours. I wanted him to come clubbing with me, there’s no way I’m going to pick up a chick here. The place is full of loud, drunk men, shouting at sports on the big screen.

  “I’m going to head home. I’ve had enough,” Connor said. I offer to give him a ride on my way to the club. He’d taken his sister and her friend to a club earlier and dropped his car home. As usual he’d caught a cab to the pub.

  I dropped Connor outside his apartment and sent texts to a few mates. Hopefully, they’ll agree to join me somewhere, I’m not ready to go home yet. My phone pings as their texts are sent back. They’re already at the club we frequent so I head over there.

  I don’t even get as far as the bar and I’m approached by some girl. She’s hot but after checkin’ her over, I figure she’s mostly plastic. I’m not gonna be fussy, a fuck’s a fuck after all. She rubs her fake tits against me and gives me a seductive smile.

  Yep, she’ll do for a little fun later.

  “Haven’t seen you around in a while handsome,” she whispers as she pushes against me and rubs her hand over my cock.

  Fuck, am I supposed to know you? I suppose in the past I’ve been fucked up on alcohol but I’m only just realising how bad I’ve been. I can’t even remember being with the mother of my kid, for fuck’s sake. I was never one to drink through the week but I certainly made up for it on weekends. That’s all in the past, now I’m trying to be a responsible father figure for Blake.

  “Been busy sweetheart.” I take a step back from her. “I have some mates I need to catch up with, come find me later.”

  Her face lit up. I noticed the sparkle in her eyes. In the past, chicks like her were who I liked. Out for a bit of fun, nothing more. No different to the old me actually. I’m surprised to find it’s a bit of a turn off now.

  Fatherhood is turning me into a pussy. I shake my head.

  After grabbing a beer from the bar, I head to where my mates said they’d be drinking. They are sharing their table with a couple of chicks. Shit! I’m up for a bit of action tonight, but first I want to hang out with my mates. Girls can come later.

  I can see the one with dark hair clearly, she’s hot. There’s a blonde there too but she has her back to me.

  My mates cheer as I approach the table. Arseholes! I guess they’re happy I’m out. I have to concede, it’s been a while since they’ve seen me. Before Blake arrived, this was our weekend routine. We went out, got drunk and picked up.

  The dark haired girl winks and graces me with a beautiful smile. I smile back. She’s even prettier up close, but is draped over two of my mates. I won’t make a move, she’s obviously taken.

  I take a gulp of beer and turn to check out the blonde. The minute her face registers, I nearly fucking choke. Blondie is fucking Red. The surprise in her eyes tells me she’s just as shocked to see me. Mark’s arm is draped over her shoulder. My body stiffens. For some reason it makes my blood boil to see his hands on her. Fucking hell no!

  CHAPTE

  R FIVE

  Jacinta

  Cass and I bought more drinks from the bar and made our way back to the table. It wasn’t long before we were pounced on. A group of four guys asked if they could join us. I was about to say no, but Cass cut me off.

  She raked her eyes over each of them, weighing her options no doubt. “Of course, take a seat.” she said. I laughed when I noticed her licking her lips as if she wanted to eat them. The girl is totally shameless! I have to admit, they were pretty hot.

  They introduced themselves with a smile before taking a seat. The guys seemed nice and at first pass, decent enough, but there was no instant attraction to any of them. Cass, having made her decision, was already all over one of them. She certainly doesn’t waste any time.

  One of them stood. He introduced himself a few minutes ago as Mark. He offered his hand and asked me to dance. It wasn’t what I wanted but I gave in and said yes. He’s cute and polite, but I’m just not feeling it.

  While we danced, he insisted on telling me I was hot. A lot. It was nice to hear at first but the way he was drooling over my body, made my skin crawl. No, definitely not feeling it.

  Before long he began to get on my nerves. I took a few deep breaths, and kept telling myself to keep my inner bitch inside. I promised myself, before leaving home tonight, I wasn’t going to let anyone make me uncomfortable.

  I may be on the lookout for a one night stand, but I still want to feel some kind of connection. Mark just doesn’t do it for me. When the music stopped between songs, I told him I wanted to return to the table. I didn’t even wait for his reply. I just turned and walked away.

  My shoes are killing my poor feet and they are begging me to sit down. Regardless of my pain, I don’t want to dance with him anymore.

  As I make my way back to the table, Mark follows close behind. Of course he plonks himself down in the chair next to me. Great! When his arm snakes around my shoulders, every part of me wants his arm removed, but I don’t want to make a scene and embarrass myself.

  He keeps whispering in my ear and it’s creeping me out. He’s had way too much to drink, his breath stinks of alcohol and he’s slurring his words. As the seconds tick by, my patience is being stretched tighter and tighter. If I don’t escape him soon, I’m going to lose it. T
rust me when I say it won’t be pretty.

  I’m about to excuse myself to flee to the bathroom when another one of the guys’ friends arrives. I glance up. There, in front of me, are those huge chocolate eyes I haven’t been able to get off my mind. My heart skips a beat. It’s my Wolf and he is staring straight at me.

  His gaze leaves mine briefly as he glares at Mark’s arm draped over my shoulder. Is that anger I see in his eyes? It quickly disappears when his eyes meet mine again.

  “We meet again Red.” A charming, smug smile graces his perfect face. It’s as if he knew all along, we would meet again. Although I’m thrilled to see him again, that smug, know-it-all smile, has me wanting to slap him again.

  “Wolf,” I squeeze out through gritted teeth. My comment makes him throw his head back and laugh. Smug bastard.

  “Oh my God. You must be the hot guy she crashed into outside the gym. She told me about you.” Cass exclaimed.

  Every muscle in my body stiffens in disbelief. My friend has the biggest mouth. “Remind me why I’m friends with you.” If looks could kill, the one I direct at Cass would have certainly done the job.

  “So you think I’m hot, Red?” His sexy lips curled into a smile.

  I have to admit he’s hot, hotter than I remember, but I don’t grace him with an answer. I have no intention of further stroking his ego.

  He stands close, gazing down at me. I have never seen someone look so smug and I have an overwhelming desire to stomp on his foot.

  I stand quickly, my chair scrapes the floor, almost toppling over. “I’m going to the bathroom,” I snap. I need to get away before I lose control and do or say something I know I’ll regret. Wolf’s eyes rake over my body when I stand up. Lust is written all over his face. Unlike Mark’s wandering eyes, Wolf’s make me feel good. A tremor shoots down my spine. My stomach does a flip-flop but I’m still annoyed with him.

  “I’ll come with you.” Mark starts to stand up.

  “I’m a big girl, I can go by myself.” I don’t mean to be so rude, but I’ve had enough. He’s getting on my nerves. It’s obvious he’s not happy about the way I’ve just spoken. I can tell by the shock on his face. Thankfully, he does sit back down.