by Lisa Hobman
‘Glasgow. The submissions were made to an address in Glasgow and then forwarded to the HQ in Inverness.’
He stepped back and scratched his head. ‘Yeah, I meant Glasgow obviously. I sent it to Glasgow and they told me they’d forward it.’ He scrunched his face and rolled his eyes, insinuating she was stupid.
‘Wrong again. It was Inverness. You lied about submitting my… what did you call it? Oh, yeah, my stupid book. It was Lachy. He sent the book and he put my agent in touch with me. So whatever claim you think you have it’s all bullshit. Now piss off back to whatever rock you crawled out from because, looking at you, that’s exactly what happened. Go back to your beloved Katie and see how long that lasts, eh? She can have you because I certainly don’t want you, you lying, cheating bastard.’ She slammed the door in his face, turned round and slid down the door until her bottom hit the floor.
Once she had calmed her racing heart and her breathing was back to normal, she checked her phone.
Still nothing.
A text came through from Shelley.
Down in reception. Coming for a drink? Just seen your ex!
Zara grabbed her cases and headed down to the reception area where Marco, Shelley, Jake and Toby were waiting.
‘Hey, honey. Are you okay?’ Marco asked when she arrived. ‘We’ve just seen Josh storming out of the hotel. He looked like shit. Still wearing last night’s clothes too. Has he been up to see you?’
‘He has. I gave him a very unpleasant piece of my mind and now, hopefully, he’s skulking back to London.’
‘Brilliant, well done you! He deserved that,’ Marco said.
‘Hey, has Lachy replied to your message yet?’
‘No, Shells, he hasn’t. But I can’t just let things go. If something is worth having it’s worth going to the ends of the earth for, right? I need to look into his eyes and know that it’s over. I mean, I can’t be in Scotland only a couple of hours away from his home and not go to see him, can I? He may reject me and I may get hurt, but at least I’ll know for sure and won’t spend my life wondering what if, will I?’
‘So you’re going to see him?’ Marco asked.
Zara nodded. ‘I’m going to hire a car and I’m going up there,’ she said decisively. ‘In Ruby Oates’ books it’s always the hero that goes to the heroine but I’m a modern woman. There’s no rule to say I can’t go to him and make things right, is there? I mean, men don’t always have to be the go-getters, do they?’ She looked to her friends for a response but they were both staring at her with a look of bewilderment. ‘Oh, shit. Am I bonkers? Is this a stupid idea?’ She slipped her hands into her hair and tugged at the strands.
Shelley huffed. ‘If you want me to be honest – and I’m pretty sure you do – then, yes, I think you’re bonkers.’
‘Oh.’ Deflated, Zara sat on the chair by the fireplace.
‘But,’ Shelley continued, ‘people thought the bloke who invented the aeroplane was bonkers and the woman who discovered penicillin, people probably thought she was bonkers—’
‘He. It was Alexander Fleming. He was a man,’ Marco interjected with a smug expression.
Shelley scowled at him. ‘I thought it was Marie Curie or someone.’
‘Nope. She was radioactivity. Fleming was penicillin.’ His grin got wider and Zara had to chew her lip so as not to laugh.
‘Well, whatever. As I was saying, people do things all the time that other people think are bonkers. Take those bright yellow boots that Marco bought. Actually, that’s a really bad example because absolutely nothing good came from that purchase but, anyway, if it gets you some closure or, best-case scenario, you get the man of your dreams, who gives a shit if it’s bonkers? You get my point… hopefully.’
Zara widened her eyes. ‘So I should go?’
Marco and Shelley glanced at each other and then shouted in unison, ‘YOU SHOULD GO!’
40
After the completion of what felt like a gazillion documents, Zara stood in the reception area of the car-rental place waiting for a set of keys. Her stomach was swooshing like a washing machine and she wasn’t sure if it was the over-indulgence on pastries or the fear for what she was about to do. It could all go drastically wrong. He could turn her away. Maybe she should call first? But then she ran the risk of him hanging up. At least if she turned up unannounced on his doorstep he was somewhat of a captive audience.
A man appeared and dangled a key chain in front of her. ‘There you go, madam. Car’s ready. It’s the little silver compact round the corner and on the left.’
Another silver dickhead, eh? Is this a sign? She thanked the man and took the keys before walking round the outside of the building to the car.
It was tiny.
‘God, it might as well be a bloody pushbike,’ she grumbled to no one in particular. But reminded herself this had all been very last minute and it couldn’t be helped that the matchbox car was the only one they had left.
She folded herself behind the steering wheel and grabbed her phone from her bag. She programmed the details into the satnav app to find the fastest route. She should be at the croft in just under two and a half hours. She plugged in her little portable speaker and rifled through her music to find the one song that would give her the courage to go. And as Florence and the Machine sang about Delilah, she pushed the button to start the engine and it purred to life like a little, feisty, silver-haired kitty.
Driving through the scenery in the afternoon sunlight was strange but wonderful. Just as she had anticipated the colours of autumn were visible and the leaves still remaining on the trees were every conceivable shade of burnt umber, sienna and ochre with a little crimson thrown in for good measure. Every so often a draught caused by her car whipped up the leaves in a kind of Mexican wave of colour, only for them to float gently down to the ground again.
The sun was beginning its descent and she was desperate to get to the croft before nightfall. The last thing she needed was to be stranded again. Especially if her arrival was unwelcome.
By the time she arrived at the croft the moon was up and the sky was a combination of light grey and orange. There was no sign of Lachy’s car or the quad. She climbed out of Silver Dickhead Mark Two and walked to the door. With a little trepidation she knocked and waited but no one came. She could try the door and no doubt find it open, but that would be overstepping a mark. She wondered if perhaps Lachy had stayed in Inverness or something. She knew he had friends there from his law-firm days. Or maybe he was with Saskia, trying to calm her down. Her mood descended rapidly at that thought and her lip trembled as she tried to eradicate the awful images of the two of them that her mind had conjured up.
She climbed back into the car and tugged up the collar of her thin jacket and wrapped it round herself as best she could as the temperature plummeted further. She would have to leave soon or she ran the risk of dying of hypothermia. And that wouldn’t be the best thing for Lachy to come home to. She began to sing to keep herself awake and focused in case he returned, but she must have dozed off as bright lights startled her awake and she twisted round in her seat to see headlights. She squinted and shielded her eyes but couldn’t see who it was. Remembering how isolated she was, she gingerly climbed from the car, her limbs numb with cold, and hoped that whoever the driver of the car was he would take pity on her.
‘Zara? Zara Bailey?’ a confused voice asked.
‘L-Lachy? Yes, it’s m-me,’ she said through chattering teeth as her body juddered.
Bess leapt from the car and ran towards her, making delighted little yipping noises. Zara bent to sink her face into the dog’s fur. ‘Hey, Bess, hey, girl. Hello… hello,’ she repeated as the dog tried to get closer.
Lachy stomped towards her, breaking the beams of light with his silhouette. ‘What on earth are you doing out here in the freezing cold in bloody stiletto shoes and a flimsy jacket, for goodness’ sake?’
She stood and her lip trembled as she saw his face in the shafts of white light
; his expression was one creased with anger.
She stammered, ‘I h-had to come. I couldn’t just l-leave things. I’m so s-sorry. If you let me get a warm or m-maybe lend me a jumper I’ll leave again. I shouldn’t have come, sorry.’
‘Your bloody face is blue. Jeez, woman, this is the Highlands, not one of your damned beach resorts. Come on inside.’
Tears escaped but thankfully he had gone to turn off the lights and engine, meaning he couldn’t see her sadness. He shoved the front door open and she was reminded again that he never locked it. Considering his reaction, she should have waited inside all along.
He grabbed a hoody from the hook by the door and tugged her arm. ‘Here, put this on. Go sit by the fire and I’ll light it.’ His tone was sharp and terse. There was no forgiveness there. More tears came.
She did as instructed and suddenly felt a blanket wrapped round her. He then lowered himself to his knees and built a fire in the grate. ‘Now stay there and I’ll make some coffee,’ he said before wandering over to the range.
Bess snuggled up to her and she buried her face in the dog’s fur again. ‘I’ve missed you, Bess. I’ve really missed you.’ The dog licked the tears from her face and put her paw on her arm. Such a sensitive soul.
A few moments later Lachy returned and handed her a steaming mug. He sat down beside her as she wrapped her icy-cold fingers round the cup and felt the warmth seeping into her skin.
‘Now, are you going to tell me what the hell you’re doing here?’ Lachy asked. Remembering their last encounter at the awards ceremony, she thought there was no wonder he was being so cold.
‘I… I just wanted to see you. To talk to you. To explain. When you didn’t respond to my text I decided I needed to come and demand that you listen to me.’ Her voice trembled and more tears spilled over.
Lachy sighed and rubbed his hands over his face. ‘Text? What text? When did you text me?’
‘Earlier today, I texted to apologise for my awful behaviour.’
He heaved a heavy sigh. ‘Right… I see. The thing is my phone got… erm… killed by Saskia after the awards ceremony. I delivered some unwelcome news to her and she snatched it from me and proceeded to stamp on it with her designer stiletto. It’s wrecked. I’ve never seen your text, Zara. I’m sorry.’
Relief flooded her veins. ‘So you don’t know what happened, then?’ He shook his head, his eyes now filled with sadness. With renewed hope she pointed at the entrance. ‘Could you pass me my bag? I think I dropped it just inside the door. I’ll show you the messages. I don’t think I’m capable of saying it all out loud just now.’
He walked over to where she had dropped her bag and retrieved it. With one hand she fumbled around and pulled out her phone. She flicked through the messages and handed it to him.
He took it and stared at the screen. He smiled as he read the first line and glanced up at her with a shake of his head. But as he continued to read the long string of texts his eyes became glassy and he wiped at them, twisting away a little so she couldn’t see.
41
When Lachy had finished reading the string of text messages he handed the phone back.
‘So now you know,’ she whispered.
‘So now I know,’ he agreed. A silence fell upon them and Zara’s eyes gave way to more tears.
‘Hey… come on… don’t cry. It’s fine. You weren’t to know.’
She sniffed and wiped at her eyes. ‘But it’s all ruined.’
He tilted her chin and gazed into her eyes. ‘It’s only ruined if we let it be.’
She gasped. ‘What… what do you mean?’
‘I honestly have no idea how all this works, Zara. It’s all completely new and ridiculously fast. But all I do know is how I felt when I kissed you that first time. Even before that, in fact, the first time I met you. No one has ever taken up space in my mind and my heart like you have. When you rejected me that night I arrived at your hotel, I was so confused. It broke my heart a little, I think. It’s the only explanation I can come up with because I’ve been walking round like a bloody zombie ever since. Then I thought I would try again at the awards. But you were so cold towards me. And you were with him. Now, that really hurt. But then tonight, you show up here telling me that you regret what happened and… If I’d received your text message I can assure you I would have been straight back to Inverness. I would have come right to you. I didn’t want to let you go the day you left for London and I still don’t. And to clarify, I was single and still am. Saskia has her own issues and she won’t be dragging me into them any more. I can promise you that. I was yours back then when we made love and I’ll happily be yours now if you still want me?’ His voice cracked as he rested his forehead on hers.
She nodded and laughed through her tears. ‘I still want you.’
He pulled her into his lap and stroked her cheek but hesitated before his lips met hers. It seemed he was waiting for her to change her mind; his breath was short and staggered, his eyes pleading and filled with fear. It was her fault he was so reluctant, so she reached up and kissed him instead. Her hands slipped into his hair as she relished the feeling of his mouth on hers once again.
When the kiss ended she whispered, ‘Lachy, take me to bed.’
He scooped her into his arms and carried her, effortlessly, up the stairs to his room. He placed her gently down and kissed her again, his desire for her almost palpable. Feeling a little warmer now her blood was rushing through her veins, she began to undress. She dropped the blanket and the other layers from her body until she was able to slip out of the shift dress and kick it aside.
He watched as she removed each piece of clothing, hunger and need visible in his tight jaw. Once she was down to her bra and panties he stood there for a moment devouring her with his gaze. Eventually something spurred him forward and he enveloped her once again, his mouth on hers with a passion that took the breath from her lungs.
‘Oh, God, I’ve missed you, Zara,’ he mumbled as he nibbled at the soft skin of her neck. Her legs weakened and she moaned at the pleasure radiating through her. She tugged on his jacket and swiftly removed it from his body, and then at his sweater and swept that from his torso. She reached out and touched the flawless skin of his stomach and he inhaled sharply as her fingers reached his belt buckle.
Once Lachy was naked she pulled him backwards onto the bed. His fingers traced the outline of her breast under the lace of her bra and he leaned to kiss the mound of flesh it created above. He freed her from her lace panties and kissed her deeply as he reached round to unfasten the clasp that was keeping her breasts from his touch. Before too long they were skin on skin; heavy breaths the only soundtrack this time as he moved slowly inside her; her legs wrapped round him and her hands on every inch of skin she could reach.
He rested himself on his elbows and locked his gaze on her as his mouth tilted up into a heart-stopping smile. ‘This is where I belong,’ he whispered, and she closed her eyes and arched her back, making the connection deeper still.
He moved faster, pulling her closer, and she grasped at him, whispering his name as pleasure heated her blood and she cried out. He followed soon after and peppered her face and neck with gentle kisses as she floated back to earth.
As he held her in his arms she stroked his chest and he smiled. ‘I can’t believe you’re here, Zara. After everything that happened I never thought I’d see you again.’ He tilted her chin and kissed her.
‘Can we just agree it was all a misunderstanding, Lachy? And can we just forget about it?’
He tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. ‘Absolutely. I’m so sorry you didn’t win that award. I felt sure you would.’
‘Did you really?’
He nodded. ‘Really. It’s funny because when I told Saskia I was head over heels in love with someone else I never expected any of this. Although, knowing that you were still in Scotland, I was so tempted to come to you again. I knew that Josh had told so many lies and I wanted to make you see that. B
ut… I suppose there’s only so many times a man can be rejected. So instead I came home and stayed busy to stop myself from coming back to try again.’
‘I wish you had tried again.’ She giggled. ‘Then I wouldn’t have had to drive Silver Dickhead Mark Two all the way up here and wait in the freezing cold.’
He laughed and tugged her on top of him. ‘Would you be okay if I said I want you again? Right now?’ His voice was a husky whisper.
Her heart leapt and her insides jellified. ‘More than okay,’ she breathed as he rolled her beneath him once more.
Zara awoke in Lachy’s arms, their limbs tangled beneath the sheets and his firm naked body wrapped round her. She sighed and snuggled deeper into his embrace. I’m finally home, she thought. Then it dawned on her that she wasn’t; that later the same day she would have to travel back to London. To her real home.
Without Lachy.
*
They sat at the table eating the scrambled egg and toast that Lachy had whipped up as Bess lay on Zara’s feet keeping them toasty warm. He kept looking across the table at her and smiling.
‘What?’ She felt her cheeks flaming.
‘I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone more beautiful.’
‘Hmm. With my messed-up bed hair and lack of make-up. You can’t have a lot to compare me to.’
‘You don’t need to be compared to anyone,’ he said in a gravelly voice that sent a tremble of desire to her core. ‘You’d outshine them all.’
She went silent, placed her fork down and lowered her gaze. A lump of emotion had tightened her throat, making it tricky to swallow.
‘Zara? Are you okay? Did I say the wrong thing?’
She lifted her chin and forced a smile. ‘Not at all. I’ll be fine… it’s just…’
He stood from his chair and walked round to her side, kneeling down before her. ‘Hey, come on, just say it. Are you having second thoughts about us?’
‘Oh, goodness, no. That’s not it at all. It’s the opposite, if anything.’