Starting Over: The Broken Hearts Club

by Michele Barlow

  Elena: I know, you like to say it, all of it.

  Cambry: He doesn’t say anything about it. He just does it.

  Waverly: Does what?

  Cambry: He just is there, like really there. He wants to know about my day. He listens when I bitch about my underage bosses. He rubs my feet after work!

  Luna: Bitch.

  Elena: Yeah, what she said.

  Cambry: Seriously, it’s like six month stuff, not two week stuff. We should still be pretending not to fart in front of each other.

  Waverly: Please tell me you haven’t farted in front of him.

  Cambry: No, but we are bad hair, morning breath comfortable already. It’s too soon, right?

  Luna: What’s too soon?

  Cambry: All of it, the closeness, the… intimacy.

  Waverly: Okay, intimacy is a good thing. It’s the thing that every woman complains she doesn’t get and here is a man offering it up to you. Shut up and take it.

  Evie: I’m going to have to second that. Believe me, if it feels real, it is.

  Cambry: Just go along with it?

  Waverly: Yes, hot guy, good with kids, and gives you on demand sex. You deserve some happiness, why not grab it?

  Cambry: And what about when he finds out I’m part of a criminal cartel?

  Luna: I’m not even that dramatic.

  Waverly: I’m sure you’ve already won him over. And you didn’t commit any crimes, you were just an unwilling participant and maybe guilty of being oblivious?

  Cambry: Oh yeah, so much better.

  Elena: Keep doing what you’ve been doing. He clearly likes you, so why rock the boat?

  Me: Great, continue to lie by omission, got it.

  Luna: Seriously dramatic.

  Cambry put her phone down and sighed. She had been happy the last few weeks. She’d been setting up her apartment, with Evan’s unexpected help. She’d found a couch for free that didn’t look too scary online, then purchased a nice cover for it so she wouldn’t be touching anyone else’s… whatever. She’d found some returned dishes that someone had returned with a broken plate so she got them for a steal after her employee discount. Evan had a friend with a truck that seemed happy to help her transport large items. His name was Ollie and he was almost as handsome as Evan, almost.

  He pulled her aside after he helped deliver her mattresses. “You’re good for him.” Was all he whispered in her ear before he left.

  She didn’t know what to make of all that and wasn’t sure if she should tell Evan, so she didn’t. He seemed like a nice friend since he smiled all the time and was willing to give up his free time to help out a friend’s… girlfriend? Lover?

  They were too soon into whatever they were doing to put labels on anything. Cambry was sure that it was all going to come crashing down at any moment. It was always better to expect the worst and not be surprised.

  Sure, that was a dismal thought, but Cambry felt like her recent troubles had shown her a new level of reality that she hadn’t ever known before.

  “Okay, pseudo-girlfriend, time for work,” she muttered to herself.

  “Cambry, stop wiggling.”

  Evan had just fallen asleep when his girl’s ass started rubbing against him. It wasn’t a bad feeling, he wasn’t an idiot.

  “Can’t. I’m all… twitchy.”

  “I’ve noticed. Didn’t I just do you good? You usually pass out.”

  “Good to know I have a pattern. I’m nervous.”

  “Babe, this is good they want to talk to you. It can’t be bad. You’re a model employee.”

  “Then why did they want me to meet with HR? Landon is an idiot; I’m making him look good. I need this job, Evan. I sadly need both of my jobs.”

  “You could always move in here with me.”

  Evan had to let go of her as she turned around on him.

  “Have you lost your mind?”

  Evan didn’t say he wanted Cambry to move in with him flippantly. He’d been thinking about it. He hated the nights she spent at her place. It didn’t feel right when they were apart. He knew she was trying to keep something from him and he was giving her the time to tell him when she was ready.

  “No, I’m not one to say things I don’t mean. You know that by now.”

  It took two nights of having Cambry in his bed to make him realize he wasn’t going to be giving her up. She was just the level of spicy and submissive that he needed in his life. She was enthusiastic and open in the bed while still allowing him to tease and please her as he saw fit.

  He liked being with her. Their conversations were the kind that you lost hours of time and didn’t mind. Evan had tried to introduce her to his family but she’d had a panic attack that had him backing off and giving her more time to come to terms with the fact that they were together, and he had no plans on changing that anytime in the future.

  She was the one. The one he didn’t even know he had been looking for. She fit him and his life as though they had always been together. Evan didn’t feel like he had to show off for her. She didn’t seem to care about money or the fact he didn’t own a big house. He liked renting, he didn’t want to mow lawns and clean out gutters. If the sun was out, he wanted to be on his bike. And hopefully soon, he could go riding with Cambry on the back.

  “I know you don’t say things you don’t mean. I also know you are ridiculously optimistic and it’s sometimes annoying.”

  “Babe, I have to get up tomorrow and take twenty three kindergarteners to the zoo. I need some sleep to face the hyped up minions tomorrow. If I have to do you good again, I may not be so nice.”

  “Is that a threat? Do me good?”

  “No threat, you know what I mean by that. I’ll tie you to the bed and make you come until you pass out, and then maybe I’ll get some sleep too.”

  “You should know me by now that I may just push you to get that.”

  “I know, I like that game, don’t get me wrong. Still, we both need sleep. You need to rest your mind and I need to build up my tolerances for tomorrow.”

  “Tolerances?”

  “To noise, screaming, crying, to stickiness, and inevitably vomit. Somebody always throws up.”

  “Charming.”

  Evan ran his thumb over her jaw. Her soft skin was pale from spending so much time indoors. She needed to ride with him so she could turn that porcelain skin warm with the touch of a little sun. Her blond hair was lying over the pillow like a cloud. He often took it down for her the moment she came into his house from work. He’d massage her scalp and enjoy her moans as he started her post work relaxation process. She looked up at him, her eyes a soft dark shade of green that had so much more sparkle in them now than when he had first met her. That sparkle was still shadowed by something she kept buried deep down.

  She was so beautiful, and somehow the last few weeks she’d grown even lovelier. It was something about the way she looked at him. No matter what she was hiding, she couldn’t hide how she was feeling about him. He could see her feelings growing every day, and to him, that brought her beauty to a peak.

  “You are an amazing, talented woman. It doesn’t matter where you work now or where you live. You will be successful because you want to be. You are hard working and you don’t mind getting your hands dirty. That is an admirable trait these days. I’m proud of you working so hard. It makes my job look easy. I’m confident about your meeting tomorrow. If you can’t be, just borrow some from me.”

  “You’re too good to me. I don’t deserve it you know.” She tried to pull her eyes away from him.

  “Look at me,” he ordered and waited for her gaze to come back to him.

  “You deserve more than I can ever give you. I know that. I know you deserve the best in life. I may not be able to give you diamonds and fancy vacations, but I can give you everything else that matters.”

  Evan had already started thinking long term. If he couldn’t get her to move in, his plan was going to take longer. He wanted Cambry with his ring on her fi
nger and her curvy ass in his bed.

  “I’ve had diamonds and fancy vacations. They didn’t make me happy.”

  “Then give me a chance to give you something else.”

  Evan tucked her against his chest and started rubbing her back. He felt her relax and not too long after she fell asleep.

  He didn’t want to ever leave his bed as long as she was in it.

  Chapter 15

  “Ms. Sinclair, I’m a little embarrassed. I was on vacation when my back-up hired you. I’m sorry she didn’t read over your resume better.”

  Cambry was sitting in the office of the Human Resources manager and she could feel the sweat starting to gather on her lower back.

  “I know I don’t have a lot of work history, but I really like this job. To be honest, I need this job. I’ve been doing well, I think. I hope Landon hasn’t said anything to imply I wasn’t doing what I was supposed to? If there is something I can do to keep my job, I’ll do it. Really, I’ll stay in the stockroom; I’ll tag clothes, whatever it takes.”

  Cambry was starting to panic. She couldn’t lose this job. The restaurant was wearing on her and she was hoping that she could move to getting more hours at the department store to be able to quit some day.

  “Ms. Sinclair, I didn’t call you in here to fire you.”

  “You didn’t?”

  “No, if I had seen your resume I wouldn’t have put you in as a salesperson. I hire people like Landon for those jobs. Your resume was fine, your degree and internship impressive. We don’t currently have an opening in our purchasing department, but I’m not going to let your talents be wasted out on the floor. I want to give you a promotion. Junior Apparel Purchaser. It’s not really what someone with your qualifications should be doing, but I want to get you in without stepping on too many toes. Our Senior Purchaser should have retired a number of years ago and although I love her to death, I think she’s not quite in touch with what people want nowadays.”

  Cambry was letting it soak in. She wasn’t getting fired, she was getting promoted. To a job she wanted. Buying clothes. Why hadn’t she listened to Evan? He always seemed to be right about things, damn him.

  “I’m flattered,” she managed to choke out.

  “Now, I know you work another job, but this position is full-time with benefits. You will also be expected to travel a few times a year to help the department at shows to look for new products. Is this going to be a problem with your other job?”

  Cambry held back the hysterical laughter that was trying to bubble up in her throat. “No, no problem. I really don’t like working in the food service industry. I like clothes and I love fashion. I will happily put in my notice at my other job. Could I possibly keep working part-time as I learn the new job? I don’t want to abandon my other employer.”

  “That is exactly the kind of request I would expect. I don’t want you to ever leave us in the lurch. Please feel free to take the two weeks and we will use that time to acclimate you to the new group and for them to realize I’m making this change whether they like it or not. I hope you have a thick skin, they aren’t mean; don’t get me wrong, they just have been the same for too long. A little new blood will do them good.”

  “I have a tough skin, believe me.” Cambry wasn’t about to explain how titanium strong your skin got when you were publicly shamed on every newspaper, news station, and internet page.

  “Good, I know that you will have a great future here at Monroe’s as long as you step over any bumps in the road and keep your eye on the future. In case I forget, there is a small pay increase. I’ll re-evaluate you in six months and see if we can give you another bump.”

  Full time, a raise, and benefits. Cambry wanted to jump up and down and clap like a maniac. But she didn’t. She maintained her composure like a mature woman would. She’d saved the screeching and celebration for private when she could call her friends.

  “Thank you, Ms. Miller, I will happily accept the position. I really appreciate the chance to use my skills. I won’t let you down.”

  “I can see your drive. I know what that looks like in someone who really doesn’t like where they are but do the work the best they can. It’s a rarity and I like to nurture it when I see it in people. Here are the new contracts for your position. You just need to sign.”

  Cambry signed and was proud her hand wasn’t shaking. She wanted to call her girls in the hallway, but there was someone else she wanted to tell first. Evan was right, he’d had faith in her the entire time and she had been the one that doubted herself.

  He cared. He barely knew her but he had decided that somehow she was going to meet with Human Resources and come out golden. More than that, he knew that she had a meeting. In fact, he knew everything about her schedule. He wanted to know when she went to the grocery store and what she bought. Her ex would have felt that was information overload and non-beneficial to his life so he didn’t want to hear it. There were dinners where she would try to tell him about her day and she knew he had tuned her out, but she kept talking just to push the feeling of being alone away.

  Evan talked, all the time. He watched her when she spoke, even if he was busy, he made eye contact to let her know he was still there. That seemed like a minor miracle to her.

  The major miracle was that he made her laugh. Silent giggles, to horrible, unflattering belly laughs. He lightened her heart when she hadn’t known how heavy it had been.

  Cambry would worry she wasn’t giving back enough, but she’d catch him staring at her and he always smiled when she did. It was infectious, she’d smile back and they would have a moment. It might be silent and small to everyone else, but it was monumental to her.

  Handing back the paperwork, she shook the manager’s hand and focused on walking slowly out of her office and down the hallway to the exit door that led to the loading dock. She should head back to the floor, but Landon was just going to have to manage things on his own.

  Pulling her phone from her pocket, she hit the picture of Evan she had taken while he was laying in bed one day. He was sexy and rumpled, smiling up at her. It was a photo that made her heart skip a beat.

  It rang a few times and then he picked up.

  “Babe.”

  He always called her that and she used to think it was a casual way to address a woman. With Evan it was so many things wrapped into one simple word.

  “Let me get this out of the way,” she started.

  “Go ahead.” There was a tick of amusement in his voice.

  “You were right.”

  “I was.” He didn’t say that as a question, he was agreeing, that jerk.

  “I got a promotion, Junior Apparel Purchaser. I start in two weeks after I give notice at Twisty Cup. It’s full-time, a raise, and benefits. I don’t have to work with fried food and sticky ice cream anymore.” Cambry said the last with a sigh. No more sticky.

  “I’m so proud of you, Cambry. I really am. I’m happy that they see they weren’t using your skills and rectified it. It may not be a fashion house in New York, but it’s a start.”

  “No, it’s not, but it doesn’t mean that I can’t use my education to help this company. Monroe’s may not be high fashion, but it is where people shop. Maybe I can help influence a little. Add a little Cambry to the orders.”

  “I’m sure you will make a splash. We should celebrate. What would you like for dinner? Anything your heart desires.”

  When she was in New York, Cambry had ingested some of the most expensive meals available. Small plates of food that cost the same as most people’s rent without batting an eyelash. She was proud to say her tastes had changed.

  “I want pasta. A big bowl of pasta,” she said proudly. Old Cambry would never have eaten pasta. Two weeks with Evan and she wasn’t feeling bad about her body. Her curves had been bothering her, the tightness of her jeans a constant thought. Now with Evan’s constant body positivity, it was starting to wear off on her. He seemed to like how she looked.

  “Good, nee
d to keep that ass round. How about Luigi’s?”

  “Sounds good, I’ll be off at eight tonight.”

  “How about I pick you up and then I’ll stay at your place tonight.”

  “Sounds good. See you soon.”

  “Bye, Baby. Have a good shift.”

  They were still doing the awkward goodbyes. There was so much unsaid between them and Cambry wasn’t about to venture into uncharted territory with that. She had other things she needed to tell him before she started being honest about her feelings.

  Chapter 16

  Cambry was starting to wonder why she even bothered paying rent. It had been two weeks since her promotion and she was spending more time at Evan’s than she was at her own apartment. She was justifying it by saying it was closer to work. But really it was more about the fact that he didn’t want her to be alone.

  Evan had been to her place a number of times, but the space was small and it really was suited for one person. She was still proud of her little space. She felt like she was back in college. Her bed was covered in new bedding with tons of pillows. She found a discounted rug at work that was comfy enough to lie on. She had taken the old TV from her parent’s house that they didn’t use anymore and had sprung for cable because there was no way she could sit around and stare at the walls all day.

  Still, she was just as comfortable at Evan’s condo as she was at home. She made up her little safe space with the intention of hiding away until she felt more human. Funnily enough, she already felt human. She felt alive and it was because of Evan. There was one thing she was keeping from him and she knew that she couldn’t drag it out much longer. Not telling him the truth was weighing on her mind and distracting her from enjoying her time with him.

  She wanted one more night with him without her history ruining everything. They were going to have a nice dinner and she wanted him to come to her place since then when she did tell him the truth, he could storm off and she wouldn’t have to do the walk of shame home.

  For one more night she was going to enjoy basking in the care and attention of Evan. Eat a meal and laugh while talking about the future as though they had one.