Her Last Breath

by Tracy Buchanan

  ‘What did your parents think?’ she asked.

  ‘They weren’t impressed. Mum hated her actually. But then Mum didn’t see her best side. It’s tough coming here, trying to integrate yourself into the Lillysands community. You know how it is.’ He looked out to sea, eyes narrowing. ‘Even I feel like an outsider sometimes and I’ve been here most of my life.’

  She looked out of the window. They were in the centre of town now; happy tourists were wandering in and out of shops on the cobbled streets. In the distance, the sails of the various boats docked up on Lillysands’ marina fluttered in the breeze.

  ‘You said you tried to have kids?’ Estelle asked.

  Aiden nodded. ‘Clarissa – that’s her name – she had some fertility issues. I’m sure we would’ve got there in the end. But we just didn’t give it enough of a chance.’

  ‘Do you miss Clarissa?’ Estelle asked.

  ‘A little. She’s back in the States now.’

  ‘I’m sorry.’

  His face tensed. ‘Don’t be. It wasn’t meant to be. I kind of suck at relationships.’

  ‘Me too.’ She thought of Seb. He still hadn’t contacted her … and she hadn’t contacted him. Did that mean it was over between them as easily as that?

  He quickly looked at her and away again. ‘So Darren Kemp was chatting you up last night, was he?’ he asked.

  ‘You know what he’s like.’ She thought again of the drunken fumble she’d shared with Darren. It had been just after the first kiss with Aiden. There had been a party on the beach and her tummy had tingled with anticipation, the way it does when you’re just thirteen and you’re naïve enough to think one kiss can be something bigger and better. But Aiden had ignored her all night. She’d grown angry. When Darren had sidled up to her, offering her some wine from a bottle, she’d taken it. Two hours later, she was lying in the sand with him, his fingers crawling up her thigh. She’d pushed his hand away – she’d only meant to make Aiden jealous. Darren had been grumpy with her after, unused to rejection.

  ‘Darren really is an idiot, you know,’ Aiden said now. ‘He’s had it all handed to him by his dad.’

  ‘That doesn’t make him an idiot.’ Estelle looked out of the window. They were in the busier part of town now. Children sat on the walls by the marina, licking ice creams and kicking legs with light tans against the bricks. Estelle unwittingly imagined being there with Aiden and Poppy and felt her eyes brim with tears.

  They eventually entered a maze of small streets, leaving the pretty scenes behind. This was the rougher part of Lillysands, packed in with terraced houses, small shops and garages. They arrived outside a small building sitting next to a grotty-looking garage. It probably offered sea views from the back, but that was its only redeeming feature; the paint on its red door peeling, its bricks overgrown with moss. Outside was a wheelless Peugeot.

  Not every part of Lillysands was pristine.

  Aiden parked his car outside and they both sat quietly, looking up at the house.

  ‘Right,’ she said eventually. ‘Let’s do this then.’

  They both got out, but Estelle hesitated before she walked down the broken path. What was she going to say? She let out a breath. She’d just wing it. That was what she was doing by impulsively coming here, after all. Why break a new habit?

  She walked up to the door and knocked.

  Chapter Fourteen

  Look at you, being so brave. Taking charge. Trying to get answers.

  I don’t quite know what you’re trying to achieve. But I can tell from the look on your face, you’re determined.

  Then again, you always have been.

  Me too in my way. Though it’s only now I’ve really started to feel some true passion and ambition for something.

  The past two days, I’ve woken with a thrill of excitement and expectation.

  What will today bring?

  How can I ram the message home this time?

  I like watching you. I like tracking the slowly creeping fear and confusion.

  The unravelling. That’s what I want, to make you unravel so you can’t harm us.

  I still have some reservations. Sometimes, the excitement is overtaken by worry.

  Am I doing things right?

  Am I right to be doing this?

  To you. Someone I once loved.

  But there’s no room for guilt.

  So I swallow it down and plan my next move.

  Chapter Fifteen

  They heard a man shout from inside. ‘Connor! Door!’

  Footsteps thundered down some stairs then the door opened, revealing a short red-haired man a couple of years younger than Estelle, arms bulging with muscles and filled with tattoos, spilling from a dirty white vest top.

  Alice’s brother. Estelle remembered him being a spotty, skinny little kid who had the bad luck of staying with his father. He’d sometimes turn up at their beach parties, watching from the distance. Estelle had wound him up once, flirting with him as he blushed furiously. Alice had jokily reprimanded her, telling her how sensitive her brother was.

  She felt sadness swell up inside as she thought about the fact Alice never got the chance to watch her brother grow up.

  ‘Yeah?’ Connor said, looking them up and down. He didn’t seem to recognise Estelle with her short blonde hair.

  ‘Is your dad in?’ Aiden asked.

  ‘Who’s asking?’ a voice shouted from inside.

  ‘Aiden Garland,’ Connor sneered. ‘He’s got some bird with him too.’

  There was silence then a sigh. ‘Let ’em in.’

  The man opened the door wide and Estelle and Aiden walked inside, getting a strong smell of body odour as they did. Estelle wrinkled her nose, pulling her hoodie around her as she entered the dingy living room. The curtains were drawn, the table dominating its centre full of rubbish and discarded food. It reminded her of her parents’ house.

  In one of the darker corners sat a sunken-looking man, and Estelle was surprised to see an oxygen tank next to him.

  Was this man really capable of hotfooting it up to London, luring a teenage girl from her home and planting Polaroid photos for Estelle?

  She looked at Connor. Maybe with the help of a strapping young man, he could.

  ‘What are you doing here?’ the old man said, squinting his eyes as he peered at Aiden.

  ‘Just want to ask some questions about Alice,’ Estelle said.

  Alice’s father glared at her. ‘Who are you?’

  ‘I lived with the Garlands,’ Estelle said. ‘I was fostered by them at the same time as Alice.’

  Alice’s father scrunched up his face in anger. ‘Those fuckers,’ he said, looking directly at Aiden. Then he turned to Estelle. ‘And so are you if you lived with them, so both of you fuck the fuck off. The Garlands aren’t welcome here.’

  Estelle stood her ground, as did Aiden.

  ‘You want me to get rid, Dad?’ Connor asked, squaring up to Aiden. Aiden looked at him, curling his fists.

  ‘Please, we loved Alice as much as you,’ Estelle said. ‘Give us a few moments.’

  Connor frowned at her, clearly trying to remember who she was.

  His dad started coughing. Connor came over and patted his back, glaring at Aiden.

  ‘Spit it out then,’ Alice’s father asked between coughs.

  ‘Did you see Alice much before she died?’ Estelle asked.

  He shrugged. ‘A bit, here and there.’

  ‘You had visitation sessions with her, right?’ Aiden asked.

  He nodded. ‘Until they poisoned her mind against me. Bloody accused me of sending her those threatening notes.’

  Estelle froze.

  ‘What notes?’ Aiden asked.

  ‘She got threatening notes slipped in her bag a few times,’ Connor said.

  ‘But that copper didn’t give a damn about them,’ his father added. ‘And to think he’s in charge now, Inspector Colin Campbell. Inspector!’ he said, laughing as he shook his head. ‘Bloody
hoiked up the ranks for doing eff-all.’

  ‘What do you mean by “threatening”?’ Aiden asked. ‘Can you remember what the notes said?’

  ‘Stuff about her not being as perfect as people thought,’ Connor replied, brow creased. ‘Threats to “expose her” for who she really was – it was all ridiculous.’

  Estelle and Aiden exchanged a look. They sounded just like the notes Estelle had been receiving.

  She peered at Alice’s father. He seemed genuinely upset about the threats, about Alice’s death. She just couldn’t see him being behind them.

  But what about the notes to Estelle? What if he was looking to blackmail her? She looked around the small house, on the table beside her was a pile of unopened bills marked urgent, a sight she remembered from when she lived with her parents. Alice’s father clearly needed the money.

  ‘Do you recognise me?’ she asked, turning back to him.

  He narrowed his eyes at her. ‘No, should I?’

  ‘I’m Stel.’

  He frowned slightly as Connor examined her face.

  ‘Oh yeah, I thought I recognised you,’ Connor said. ‘You look different.’

  ‘Do you know what I do now?’ she asked.

  The two men looked confused. They clearly didn’t.

  ‘No, why?’ the old man asked.

  ‘It doesn’t matter,’ Estelle said with a sigh. So they didn’t know. Sure, they could be lying, but something in their reaction told her they weren’t. So that put the blackmail theory to bed.

  ‘Why are you here really?’ Connor asked her.

  ‘Estelle hasn’t been back to Lillysands for a while,’ Aiden explained. ‘It brought back memories of Alice.’

  ‘So you thought you’d come over and give us the third degree?’ the old man asked. ‘Sticking your nose in like all the other people who walk around this town like they own it. The Garlands. The Kemps.’ The man looked into Estelle’s eyes, his chest rattling as he breathed in and out. ‘It’s not me you need to grill. It’s them that are destroying this town bit by bit. My Alice was only the beginning. They’re rotten to the core, all of ’em, and every little thing they touch turns to shit.’ He glared at Aiden, who was clearly included in his rant.

  Aiden’s face hardened, eyes sparking with anger. Estelle put her hand on his arm to calm him.

  ‘What’s that look for?’ Connor asked. He marched up to them, getting right in their faces. He reeked of booze and stale sweat, just like Estelle’s father had, and suddenly she saw her father standing over her, not Connor: eyes filled with rage, the reek of alcohol on his breath.

  She started shaking, felt the room spin.

  Aiden put his hand on her back. ‘Estelle?’

  ‘I’m fine,’ she said, taking a deep breath to will the memories away. She peered at the two men. ‘Did you ever have any suspicions about who was sending those notes to Alice?’ she asked. ‘Did Alice?’

  ‘No idea,’ the old man said. ‘The girl was just fourteen, for Christ’s sake. Who’d want to scare her like that?’

  Estelle and Aiden exchanged a look. They both knew how mean Alice’s father had been to her. But what was the point of bringing it up now.

  ‘And her death,’ Estelle said softly. ‘I presume you were surprised she committed suicide.’

  She avoided Aiden’s annoyed look.

  ‘Too right I was,’ Alice’s father said. ‘She was driven to it! Everyone thinks the Garlands are perfect,’ he said, sneering at Aiden, ‘but those posh families always have secrets to hide.’

  ‘Did Alice ever say anything to you about Autumn and Max mistreating her in any way?’ Estelle asked.

  Aiden opened his mouth to say something, but she gave him a look.

  ‘No,’ Alice’s father said. ‘But the girl was fine with me.’

  ‘Those bruises I saw her with the first day she arrived didn’t look fine,’ Aiden said, glaring at Alice’s father.

  Estelle noticed Connor didn’t do anything this time. He just watched his father.

  ‘Bruises? Bullshit,’ Alice’s father said. ‘Something the social worker made up to take her off me.’

  Aiden shook his head in disgust. Connor eyeballed him, and the atmosphere in the room sparked.

  ‘Okay,’ Estelle said, steering Aiden towards the front door. ‘I think that’s everything. Thanks for your time.’

  ‘Nice of you to visit!’ Alice’s brother called out in a fake sing-song voice as they left.

  They stepped outside, the door slamming shut behind them. Estelle closed her eyes, breathing in the fresh clean air.

  ‘So Alice was receiving threatening notes too?’ Aiden said. ‘What’s this all about?’

  Estelle sighed. ‘I don’t know.’

  ‘Funny place for you two to be hanging out,’ a voice boomed from beside them.

  They both looked up to see Darren Kemp crawling along in a sleek black Jaguar, the window down, his elbow hanging out of it.

  ‘Funny place for you to be too,’ Aiden said, narrowing his eyes at him.

  Darren turned to Estelle, ignoring Aiden. ‘You coming to the event I mentioned for local investors, Estelle? It starts in a couple of hours.’

  ‘I don’t think so,’ Estelle answered, mind still on her previous conversation. ‘Thanks for inviting me though.’

  ‘Oh come on,’ Darren pleaded, flashing her a smile. ‘You can go with Autumn and Max. I need our bright star there. Someone needs to make me look good alongside all those Chief Inspectors and MPs.’

  Estelle frowned. ‘Chief inspectors? Do you mean Chief Inspector Campbell?’ she asked, thinking of what Alice’s dad had said about the new Chief Inspector.

  ‘You remember him?’ Darren asked. ‘Done well for himself, hasn’t he? Yep, he’ll be there.’

  Estelle felt her heartbeat quicken. If Colin Campbell had been in charge of Alice’s case, then maybe he knew something that could explain the link between her and Poppy?

  ‘It’ll be at the LS Hotel and Restaurant,’ Darren added. ‘The huge new building across from the marina? I own it.’

  ‘Your dad owns it,’ Aiden said.

  Darren looked him up and down. ‘I own a share, actually.’ He turned to Estelle. ‘So I’ll see you there?’

  ‘I’ll be there,’ she said, ignoring Aiden’s incensed looks.

  As Darren drove off smirking, Aiden turned to Estelle. ‘What the hell are you doing?’

  ‘You heard him. The police officer in charge of Alice’s case will be there! Come along too, we can both speak to him.’

  Aiden looked up at the sky in frustration. ‘Seriously, Stel, I think you’re reading too much into all this. Sure, someone’s clearly trying to mess with your mind. But I think – I hope – Poppy has just run away. And I hope Alice just committed suicide because the alternative—’ He shook his head. ‘It’s too crazy to consider.’

  Estelle stepped away from him. ‘If you can’t see something’s wrong with all this, then you’re the crazy one.’

  Aiden sighed. ‘I wasn’t saying you’re crazy! Look, I understand why you might be suspicious. But it’s all a bit far-fetched, don’t you think? Murder? Kidnap? I just – I don’t want you to go storming in and questioning Chief Inspectors about things you can’t be sure about.’

  Estelle crossed her arms. ‘I’m a grown-up now, Aiden. I think you can trust me to handle things carefully.’ She looked towards the hotel where the luncheon was being held. ‘And I’m going to that lunch, with or without you.’

  ‘I was never able to stop you when we were kids, clearly I can’t now either.’ He smiled slightly then peered at his watch. ‘I have a climb soon so I can’t go anyway. Why not come see what I do for five minutes? Then you can go home and change for Darren’s wankfest.’

  She smiled at the boyishness she remembered. ‘Sure.’

  As they got back into his car, she couldn’t help but continue smiling. This was the way it used to be between her and Aiden: arguments that were forgotten as quickly as t
hey blew up. Despite the circumstances, she couldn’t help but acknowledge it was good to be back in his company again.

  They headed towards the sea. People were taking advantage of the sunshine, stretched out in jeans and T-shirts, reading papers and smiling. Some were eating fish and chips. Estelle and Aiden used to do that, cuddled together under a blanket, watching as the sun set. The smell of vinegar and salt always took her right back to those times, even now.

  ‘There’s a storm coming,’ Aiden said, pointing at the gathering black clouds that were drawing closer. ‘It’ll come quicker than we think. The rain’s been terrible here the past month. Not great for rock climbing: the cliff-face will struggle.’

  ‘You sound like Mr Tate.’

  ‘Ah, good old Mr Tate,’ he said with a nostalgic smile.

  ‘I saw him earlier actually.’

  Aiden frowned. ‘You heard about Mrs Tate?’

  Estelle nodded.

  ‘Why does bad stuff always seem to happen to good people?’ He looked up towards where Alice had jumped. ‘Have you thought about Alice much since you left?’

  She looked at him in surprise. ‘Of course.’

  ‘Me too. I go over scenarios in my mind in which I was here to save her.’ He clutched the steering wheel, his knuckles whitening. ‘If only I was fucking here.’

  ‘You wouldn’t have been able to do anything if she was pushed.’

  He looked at her, frowning. ‘You really believe that, don’t you?’

  ‘I don’t know.’

  He took his eyes from the road briefly to look at her meaningfully. She turned away, sighing.

  Aiden pulled up by the marina and they both got out, heading towards Lady Lillysands. In front of them was a small wooden hut with a hatch that was closed, and a laminated poster declaring a variety of different rock climbing opportunities beneath a banner saying ‘Climb Lady Lillysands with a local expert’. On it was a photo of Aiden climbing the rock, looking over his shoulder and smiling into the camera, his blond hair lifting in the wind, his cheeks and forehead scorched brown by the sun. His green eyes were alarming against his tanned skin, his arms muscled. Anyone walking past would do a double take, just as she’d done the first time she saw him in that cave.