Since Forever Ago

by Olivia Besse

  Just as their breathing grew a tad heavier and their kisses became a bit more probing, Max pulled away from her mouth. Wait, what are you doing, motherfucker? Riley couldn’t help but think as she opened her eyes in confusion. Hurry the hell up and come back.

  Shooting her a shy smile, Max gently traced her cheekbone with his thumb. “Is this... okay?” he cautiously asked, biting his lip like a nervous little boy.

  Unable to come up with any intelligible response, Riley merely nodded her head, her gaze drifting in the direction of his lips. Taking a deep breath, she slowly reached for the hem of Max’s tee shirt, helping him rip it off before working on the buckle of his belt.

  “I don’t want to force you to do anything if you’re uncomfortable,” he blurted out once his pants had fallen to the ground. “You can tell me to—”

  “Does it look like I’m uncomfortable?” Riley breathed out, reaching up to loop her arms around his neck and pull his face closer.

  What the hell are you doing? Oh my God, what are you doing? Did you really just do that? You did not just do that. Except that you did. Oh my—

  Once Max’s lips hit her own again, Riley felt as though her brain had shut off. Even though she was still aware that it was Max she was kissing, she couldn’t help but notice that everything just felt right. It had never felt like this with Noah, not even when the two of them were deep in the throes of their puberty-induced passionate romance.

  This must be the feeling that movies are based on, Riley mused to herself, thinking back on that scene with the couple making out in the backseat of a car. She hadn’t understood it then, but she could definitely understand it now. In fact, someone could probably shove the two of them into a cardboard box and she wouldn’t have noticed. All she knew was that she couldn’t get enough of Max, even when he was closer to her than he’d ever been before.

  Max’s kisses were gentle but firm, slow but urgent, passionate but loving. Riley felt her head buzz with delight as they began clumsily making their way towards his bed, neither of them moving their lips away from the other’s. His hands were all over her, running up and down her back and through her hair as his arms held her close to his body. As the backs of her calves hit his mattress, the two tumbled onto his unmade bed together, their hands groping for the other’s body before Max rolled over and hovered over her.

  Starting with a light kiss on her forehead, he began making his way down, planting a trail of kisses in his wake. As he placed one final kiss on the soft skin of her inner thigh and began slinking off her underwear, however, Riley froze uncomfortably.

  “Wait!” she called out, instinctively drawing her legs up. “What are you doing?”

  “What do you think I’m doing?” Max asked with a laugh, looking up at her with an amused smirk.

  “That! Don’t do that.”

  “What?” he asked, frowning in confusion. “Why?”

  “That’s gross,” Riley simply replied, as if the reason was glaringly obvious.

  “Well, I mean, yea, but...”

  When Max attempted to continue what he had been doing before she had interrupted him, Riley tensed up and grabbed at the hem of her underwear. “Why do you keep trying to do that?”

  “Why wouldn’t I? I just want you to feel good.”

  “I don’t... I don’t need that to feel good,” she protested, her cheeks burning in mortification. Were they really having this conversation right now?

  “Have you ever had this done to you?” Max suddenly asked, a tired look on his face.

  “I pee from there!” Riley hissed, glancing around the room in embarrassment. “That’s super disgusting!”

  “I pee from my dick,” Max replied matter-of-factly. “Do you think blow jobs are gross too?”

  “Well, no, but...”

  “Noah really is an asshole,” Max muttered under his breath, shaking his head in annoyance. “Lucky for you, I’m disgusting and gross, so let me just do this, okay?”

  Had it been anyone else demanding buffet access to her nether regions, Riley would have vehemently denied him entry. But seeing as how it was Max who was sitting at the end of the bed, looking up at her with an earnest smile, she reluctantly released the death grip on her panties.

  With a bright grin plastered on his face, he leaned in towards her mouth and gave her another lingering kiss, laying her head back onto the pillow as he made his way down once again. As she felt him slip off her underwear and gently part her legs, Riley let out a quivering breath and shut her eyes tightly.

  What she had not expected was such an exciting sensation to hit her once she felt Max’s tongue. Overwhelmed by the cool wetness, Riley let out a tiny gasp of surprise, clenching her teeth lightly as she felt his exhaled breaths tickling the sensitive surface of her skin. He moved at an almost glacial pace, taking his time in making long licking motions all across the length of her, gracing her clit with the occasional flick of his tongue.

  Riley could feel her body relax and tense up at the same time, her breathing growing shallow as she became more and more turned on. Her thighs tightened around Max’s head and she began running her fingers through his hair, his own fingertips moving up and down the lengths of her inner thighs, driving her wild. Max took cues from each of her shivers and moans, focusing on the sensitive spots that translated to the most thrashing and crying out on her part.

  She could hardly contain her thoughts as something inside of her just clicked, causing everything to seem to be moving in slow motion as a ringing filled her ears. Rolling waves of warmth and tingling flooded her body, seemingly originating from the heaviness of her chest to the slightly numb tips of her fingers and toes.

  “Oh fuck,” she grunted out, letting out a snort of incredulous laughter as the surge of pleasure overwhelmed her. “Oh my FUCK.”

  A proud smile on his face, Max lifted his head and began leaving kisses everywhere on his way up to her neck. “I really, really like you,” he whispered into her ear before turning his head to face her.

  Riley looked into his eyes as a tiny smile played on her lips. She could feel his dick on her thigh, and slowly moved her hand onto it, causing him to let out a groan of approval. She was still throbbing like crazy, and all she knew was that she wanted him inside of her.

  Not breaking eye contact for even one second, Riley slowly guided Max into herself, letting out a quiet gasp as she felt him inside. Every small movement that he made caused what felt like an earthquake to erupt inside of her, and the surface of her skin prickled in joy as his own rubbed against it.

  I can’t believe I’m having sex with Max, she couldn’t help but think as he intently held her gaze. And he likes me? Like, in what way? Platonically? Romantically? Oh God, that felt good. I wonder if it felt good for him. Oh yea, that. OH GOD.

  I wonder what he thinks of my boobs, she pondered as she felt his chest rub against them. Is Max a boob guy? Ugh, what are you talking about? Every guy is a boob guy.

  I bet April has bigger boobs than me. I wish my boobs were bigger. I hope my stomach looks okay. Can he notice that I’m sucking in? I wonder what I look like from that angle. I probably look gross. Nobody should be allowed to see me from that angle. Aw, fuck, that felt good. RIGHT THERE, RIGHT THERE, HOLY SHIT.

  Max held the side of Riley’s face as her eyelids fluttered closed, another wave of euphoria coursing through her body as she came again. As he also felt himself being on the verge of finishing, he buried his head into the crook of Riley’s neck, inhaling her scent and holding her close. Panting hard, she dug her fingernails into surface of his back, bracing herself for the next surge of pleasure that overcame her.

  At this point, she was unable to form any coherent thoughts, let alone words, succumbing to the incomparable feeling of having her brains properly fucked out. Max let out a heavy gasp before collapsing onto her, and she was comforted by the weight of his body on top of her own. Max eventually rolled off of her and pulled her body close to his, neither of them saying a word as their
lids grew heavy with fatigue. And, after Max planted a lazy kiss on her cheek and snuggled her more tightly, Riley fell asleep in the arms of her best friend, neither of them realizing the consequences of their actions in that sleepy, blissful moment.

  Seventeen

  Oh fuck, Riley slowly thought to herself as she pried her eyes open, bringing a hand to her pounding forehead. That was literally the weirdest dream ever. I can’t believe I actually dreamt that—

  Oh. My. God, she panicked, her eyes widening in horror as she stared directly at Max’s peacefully slumbering face that sat only a few inches away on the same pillow. It wasn’t a fucking dream? That actually happened? No way. There’s no fucking way.

  Whimpering to herself, she carefully lifted up the blanket at an almost excruciating pace, silently pleading that her fears wouldn’t be confirmed upon glancing at what was underneath. Much to her dismay, however, she was met with the vision of her naked body, along with Max’s own.

  What the fuck, Riley silently screamed, frantically looking around the room as she thought of her next move. Had she really just seen Max naked? She hadn’t seen him naked since they were six years old! How was this possible? Surely this wasn’t legal?

  Biting her lower lip so fiercely that she thought her front teeth might break off, Riley turned her body around as carefully as she could, trying her best not to wake Max. Scanning the room with her eyes, she spotted her dress on the floor and proceeded to slink off of the bed and crawl in its direction.

  After pulling it on and grabbing one of Max’s hoodies, she sprinted towards the door in hopes to escape from the situation without having to face Max. Tiptoeing out of his room as quietly as she could, Riley pulled the door shut at a painfully slow pace, grimacing uncomfortably until it clicked shut. Letting out a relieved sigh, she swiftly turned around, only to let out a tiny shriek as she locked eyes with someone who had been observing her from the other end of the hallway.

  Riley shot a frustrated glare at Evan, who was grinning at her in an irritatingly knowing manner. “Evan!” she hissed out in annoyance. “What the fuck! Are you trying to give someone a heart attack?”

  “Good morning, sleepyhead,” he obnoxiously cooed out, his smile broadening as he glanced at Max’s door before returning his gaze to Riley. “Fancy running into you here.”

  Riley merely continued to glare at him, self-consciously zipping up Max’s sweatshirt as she did. “Don’t start with me.”

  “Off so soon?”

  “Shut the fuck up,” she grumbled out, shifting her bag onto her shoulder. “I don’t want to hear it.”

  “Hear what?” Evan innocently asked, pretending to be offended by her comment. “Someone’s a little moody, hm?”

  “One more word and I swear—”

  Before she could finish, the sound of a door creaking shut in the distance caused both of them to turn their heads. “Eek!” April screeched when she caught them staring at her, a nervous smile on her face. Her hair was a disheveled mess, and her impeccably applied eyeliner was now smudged all along her lower lids. “I, um... I didn’t know anyone would be up! I was just... um, like, grabbing something really quick—”

  “From Jeremy’s room?” Evan cut her off, letting out a snort of laughter. “What? Herpes?”

  “Oh my God, Evan,” she huffily replied. “Anyway, let’s just pretend we didn’t see each other, okay? And can you, like, not tell Max about this?”

  “Not like he’d care, but sure,” Evan mumbled before turning to Riley again with that annoying grin of his.

  “Awesome,” April gushed out before flipping her hair over her shoulder and smoothing down her dress, obviously not catching on to the sarcasm in his voice. In stark contrast to Riley’s oversized “morning after” disguise, April seemed to have no qualms about walking down frat row in just her skimpy dress from the night before. “Okay, then. I really need to get going. My sisters have been, like, texting me all morning. We’re having a cupcake auction! Make sure to stop by, okay?”

  “You’re auctioning off... cupcakes?” Evan asked with a frown.

  “Ugh, no,” April scoffed in response. “That’s, like, the stupidest idea ever. We’re auctioning off dates with the girl holding the cupcake, duh!”

  “Can I just bid on the cupcake instead?” Evan quipped, prompting Riley to hold back a snort of laughter.

  “God, Evan, you’re so annoying!” the clueless girl squealed out before slapping him on the arm. “Love your sweatshirt! So cute!” she added to Riley with a big smile before proceeding to sashay down the hallway in the direction of the staircase.

  “Is she for real?” Riley asked with a laugh, glancing down at the hot sauce-stained hoodie once April’s footsteps could no longer be heard.

  “Sadly, yes.”

  “And she doesn’t even care about doing the walk of shame in her dress and heels?”

  “For her,” Evan began with a pensive look on his face. “It’s more of a stride of pride.”

  Riley shook her head in disapproval. “I can’t believe she slept with him after trying to get into Max’s pants all night.”

  “Well, Max’s pants were kind of preoccupied...”

  “Stop talking,” Riley cut him off, her cheeks turning pink at his words. “Anyway, I didn’t drive last night, so give me your car keys.”

  “What? No way!”

  “Then give me a ride home,” Riley groaned. “I’m not a ‘stride of pride’ kind of girl.”

  “You have your sweatshirt to cloak your remorse,” he said with a smirk. “So cute!”

  “I thought the whole point of being in a fraternity was to shape you into a respectable gentleman,” Riley countered, shooting him a sullen glare.

  “Where the hell did you hear that?”

  “Come on, you useless motherfucker, just give me a ride home!” she pleaded in a low grumble.

  “Well since you asked so politely.”

  Once they had made it into his car and had buckled up their seatbelts, Riley slumped down in the seat and pulled the hood of the sweatshirt over her head to shield her eyes from the bright sunlight.

  “Someone’s in a hurry to get out of here, hm?” Evan mused as he pulled out onto the road.

  “Don’t want to hear it,” Riley reminded him, to which he shrugged and began loudly singing along to a pop song that was playing on the radio.

  Are all of them in some sort of in-car acapella group or something? Riley grumpily wondered as she covered her ears and slunk lower in the passenger seat.

  “Wait a minute. Is that who I think it is?” Evan suddenly asked once they had finally pulled up in front of her apartment.

  At this, Riley shifted herself up in her seat and turned her gaze out the window, only to be filled with a feeling of dread mixed with apprehension.

  Oh, fuck, is that who Evan thinks it is? Riley thought to herself, squinting at the figure seated on her doorstep. Why are you even squinting, you idiot? You would’ve been able to tell that it was him from a mile away.

  Why is he even here? What the hell does he want? she wondered, peering over at Noah with a suspicious frown. I already gave that box full of his crap to Max.

  Did he change his mind? Is it possible that he wants me back? Is he trying to get back together with me? Why now? Why today of all days?

  Do I even want to get back together with him? What about Max?

  Oh God, Max. What the hell are you going to do about that, Benson? Good fucking going.

  “Shut up and go home, Evan,” Riley muttered, her head spinning as she unbuckled her seatbelt with slightly shaking hands.

  “That’s no way to talk to your mother,” Evan dramatically replied with a scoff.

  “Thanks for the ride,” she mumbled distractedly as she bit her lip and pushed the door open. “And don’t tell anybody about what you saw. Or anything, for that matter.”

  “So many secrets to keep,” he sarcastically replied with a pout. “So little time to plan out elaborate blackmailing schemes.
”

  “Go and bid on a cupcake or something,” Riley replied with a roll of her eyes once she had stepped out from the car. “BYE.”

  “Honey, don’t forget your lunch!” she could hear him call out as she swung the door shut. “Have a nice day at school!”

  Fuck, fuck, fuck, she frantically repeated in her head as she began trudging up the walkway. What was Noah doing on her doorstep? Did he just assume that it was perfectly fine for him to ambush her like this? What the hell was his problem?

  And how long had he been waiting for her? Why was he even there? What should she start off with? A simple “hi”? No, too awkward. Maybe a “hey”? Hm, would that be too casual? How about a—

  “Riley.”

  Riley had been so preoccupied with formulating the perfect greeting that she hadn’t even noticed that she’d walked right past him. Swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat, Riley spun around and shot him a weak smile. “Er... uh... um... hi-ello.”

  Hi-ello? HI-ELLO? What the fuck was that?!

  Whether out of habit or out of actual emotional attachment, her heart was beating wildly in her chest as she held Noah’s gaze. Say something, idiot! she screamed to herself, staring back at him like a deer caught in a big rig’s headlights. Wait, you just did. It’s his turn! Don’t say anything! Just wait for him to respond!

  Why isn’t he saying something?

  “Can we talk?” Noah asked, an uncomfortable smile on his face.

  “Uh...”

  “I need to talk to you.”

  Be cool, Benson. Cool, calm and collected.

  “What... what is there to talk about?” she cautiously replied.

  “I just... I don’t know,” Noah began, running his hand along the back of his neck. “I... I miss you.”

  “What?”

  “I miss you,” he repeated, staring directly into her eyes. “I guess I finally realized how wrong I was this whole time.”

  He missed me? Riley sounded out in her head. He... misses me?