Julie Seedorf - Fuchsia Minnesota 02 - Granny Skewers a Scoundrel

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Julie Seedorf - Fuchsia Minnesota 02 - Granny Skewers a Scoundrel Page 10

by Julie Seedorf


  At the word pretty, Granny grabbed her pocketbook and headed for her bedroom. “It’s late, it’s been a long day. I need my beauty sleep. You can let yourself out, Franklin.” As Granny got to the bedroom door, she remembered her new strategy. “Oh, and Franklin, thank you for your concern.” Granny walked back into the living room and up to Franklin, who was now standing by the door. Because he was such a large man it took all she could do to stretch high enough, getting as high on her tiptoes as she could to reach his cheek with her lips, giving his cheek a quick brush of a light kiss. Before Franklin could say anything, Granny sprinted back into her bedroom and shut the door.

  Once Granny heard the door close, and was sure Franklin had departed, she quietly walked back into the living room and grabbed her binoculars, training them on Sally’s house. Again, she could see two silhouettes in the window. Just as she was about to put down her binoculars, she saw the heads of the two silhouettes meet face to face. Soon she saw the blinds being drawn and the lights go out in Sally’s house. Granny put down the binoculars and slowly made her way to bed, a thoughtful frown on her face.

  Granny was in the middle of a dream or rather a nightmare. In it, Thor was kidding Elena, the floozy across the street. Granny was about to raise her giant knitting needle with the rubber tip missing from its body and save Thor from the clutches of the dangerous woman, when the phone ringing brought her out of the dream. “What?”

  “Have you seen Baskerville?” Franklin’s voice through the phone showed concern.

  “Not since last night. He is probably out with the shysters. They should be at your house shortly after doing their rounds.”

  “Itsy and Bitsy, Fish and Little White Poodle are here but there is no Baskerville. He’s always with them now.”

  Granny sat up in bed abruptly. “I’ll take care of this. That hussy stole my son and now she’s stolen my dog.” Granny slammed the phone down, jumped into her flip flops, forgetting that it was almost winter, threw on her purple workout clothes that she had worn yesterday and dashed out of her house. She forgot to look both ways before crossing the street and was reminded that perhaps she should have when she heard the screech of tires right next to her ear. Mavis and George jumped out of their car that had almost hit Granny.

  “Granny, what are you doing? We could have killed you––smash, splat, right on the ground, like a pancake!” Mavis declared.

  “We went out for early morning pancakes; we didn’t think we’d almost make a human one on our way home,” George scolded.

  “No time right now,” Granny answered. “Your neighbor has kidnapped Baskerville and Thor.” Granny continued on her way across the street, reaching the door of Sally’s house––it was still Sally’s house if Granny had anything to say about it. Granny started pounding hard and loud. George and Mavis followed Granny. They had seen Granny in this mode of operation before and it never ended well.

  The door opened. “Why, Granny, what can I do for you? I am so sorry about last night. Thor explained about your accident; Didn’t he say it was an accident? I can’t remember. Anyway, I am so sorry about Gottlieb bothering you. Would you like some coffee? We should get to know one another since perhaps I might be your daughter-in-law someday.” Elena said sweetly.

  George and Mavis got to Granny just as it looked as if she was going to attack Elena. They grabbed her arms and lifted her away from the door.

  “Unhand me. I was just going to give her a bear hug. You know the kind where the bear squeezes the person to death? Is Thor here? And where did you hide Baskerville?”

  “Thor is not here, Granny. He is probably home in bed. I haven’t seen that huge hound of yours. What makes you think he’s here? And I am so sorry about yelling at you before about your critters. Thor explained and if Thor can love those little hole diggers, so can I,” Elena apologized in a meek tone.

  “We have to go now,” George explained to Elena as Mavis grabbed Granny’s arm and started leading her back across the street.

  Granny yelled back to George. “Ask her where her goat is. GetLeave or Gottlieb or whatever!”

  “Perhaps we should call Franklin,” Mavis suggested. “Or Thor. It seems you aren’t over last night yet.”

  Granny was about to protest Mavis’ suggestion, when Franklin drove up in his ‘57 black Corvette convertible. “What’s going on?” Franklin asked Mavis as George came across the street and joined the group.

  “Granny had a little run in with our nice, pretty little new neighbor Elena,” George explained.

  Both Mavis and Granny looked at George and said at the same time, “Nice? Pretty?”

  Mavis walked over and grabbed George’s arm. “Perhaps we should go home and work on a new reality show. It’s called ‘Pretty Little Neighbor Moves out of Town’.”

  Granny and Franklin watched George and Mavis walk home before continuing on into Granny’s house. Granny was about to explain to Franklin what the problem was when they were greeted in Granny’s living room by Baskerville and Elena’s goat Gottlieb.

  “Baskerville, why are you with that goat?” Granny asked, about ready to grab the goat when Baskerville jumped in front of Gottlieb to stop Granny. Every time Granny moved one way to get the goat, Baskerville moved right along with her to block her. Granny looked at Franklin. “It’s your turn. Gottlieb needs to go home.”

  Franklin moved to grab Gottlieb when Baskerville howled, jumped up and knocked Franklin off kilter, not knocking him down but disturbing his balance enough so that Baskerville and Gottlieb could run out the window door that had popped open when Baskerville howled.

  Franklin and Granny ran and threw the front door open to catch them but all they caught was a glimpse of them running down the street.

  “What do we do now?” Franklin asked Granny. At that moment Franklin’s cell phone rang. Granny listened in as he answered the call.

  “What? Keep them there. I’ll be right there. I’ve got to go, Granny. My daughter needs me. I will get Baskerville and that mangy goat. You stay put and get some rest.” Franklin hustled down the steps, got into his car and disappeared down the street.

  Granny turned to go back into her house when she heard another car start up. It was the hussy backing out of her garage at the back of her yard. Granny watched as she too drove down the street in the same direction Franklin’s car had gone. Granny turned to see if there was life at Thor’s house. How did he miss all this ruckus? Granny checked Mavis and George’s house and she could see them having an animated conversation in their living room. Granny turned to look at Sally’s house. She turned, stepped into her house long enough to find her cell phone and her knitting needle cane, stepped out and closed the door. Nonchalantly she started strolling toward Sally’s house, carefully checking to make sure no one was looking.

  CHAPTER SEVENTEEN

  Granny made sure she looked in both directions before crossing the street since she almost ended up as flat as a pancake the last time she decided to visit Sally’s house. She still wanted to make sure that the coast was clear.

  She decided to see if possibly the hussy had left the door open in her haste to leave. Granny walked up to the door, looked around, checking to see that no one was watching and turned the knob. The knob turned and Granny heard the latch of the door open. She gently pushed slowly on the door to open it a crack and peered in through the crack to make sure no one was there. Then she gave a little “ha hoo” to see if anyone answered. They didn’t. Granny quickly moved her body all the way inside the house and shut the door.

  Granny looked around the kitchen. It was the same as when Sally lived there. She moved further into the house. Everything was the same. When she checked the room that had been Sally’s bedroom everything was the same there too including Sally’s stuff still in the closets and drawers. Why was everything the same?

  Granny continued on to what had been the guest bedroom. It looked like a whirlwind had hit this room. There were clothes strewn all over. Makeup littered the nightstand a
nd the bed was still unmade.

  Granny wondered why, if Elena had moved into the house and had been here at least for a few weeks, she had she not changed things if she was planning to stay.

  Granny moved on to the basement. It looked like it had been in the remodel phase. Tools were set up but it looked like the construction had not gone very far. Was Sally remodeling her basement? Part of the wall had started to be cut out but the cut stopped halfway down from the ceiling. But hadn’t the basement been empty when Granny had peered through the basement windows on her earlier snoop trip?

  Granny decided she would ponder the thought of what was happening in this basement, but she knew she was running out of time before the hussy would come back and she still wanted to check out the garage. Granny headed back upstairs to the door off the kitchen. She opened it a crack and peered out to make sure no one was watching. The coast was clear so she stepped outside shutting the door behind her making sure the door was all the way shut. She started to walk to the back yard, checking to see that Mavis and George were not watching, but then on second thought she turned back and wiped off the handle of the door with her top to make sure she didn’t leave any fingerprints.

  As she stood in the backyard surveying the now dying weeds because of the fall weather, Granny decided to check out the garage. She walked to the back of the yard along the driveway and touched the handle on the door on the side of the garage. It moved and so she twisted it a little more and opened the door. Checking to make sure no one was watching, she moved all the way inside.

  There didn’t seem much to see inside. The garage was empty except for a pen where Gottlieb must be kept. His bowls were filled with food and water and there was a place for him to sleep. Since Granny didn’t know much about goats, she didn’t know if this was a good way to keep a goat or not. Granny did notice a heater that would keep the garage warm in the cold weather so Gottlieb would have warmth. Granny made a note in her mind, to check out the care of goats. Maybe she could report the floozy/hussy to the Humane Society so she didn’t have to deal with Mr. Bleaty.

  As Granny was considering the thought of the Humane Society, she heard a car drive up the driveway and the garage door start to lift. She quickly ran to the side door, ran out and decided to hide on the other side of the garage. As she was running past what looked to be an old water pump, Granny tripped over something large hidden in the weeds and fell flat on her face. She turned her head to the right and saw a small, round stone structure sticking out of the ground. Her eyes went wide realizing that had she fallen mere inches to her right, that stone might have actually closed her eyes forever. She was ready to lift herself off of the ground when she heard the side door of the garage open. Granny stayed still, hidden by the tall dying weeds.

  Granny peered through the weeds and listened for the opening and closing of the house door. When she was sure the coast was clear, she sat up first checking to make sure no one was watching.

  Granny examined the round stone structure that poked out of the ground. It appeared to be an old cistern. Sally’s house had been built on land that had been cleared when the original home on the property had burned many years ago. Apparently the old property still had the old cistern that had held rainwater. Granny hadn’t noticed it before because she had never been this far back in Sally’s yard or on this side of the garage. Not too far from the cistern was an old pump from an old well. Apparently it had never been sealed but that was not so surprising since Fuchsia pretty much let homeowners do what they wanted with their property, following the old motto Your Home Is Your Castle.

  Lifting herself off the ground cautiously, Granny decided it was time to wind her way home. Gottlieb was not in the garage but where was Baskerville?. Since she was on the side of Sally’s that led into the trees because no more houses had been built on that edition, Granny decided the trees were her best bet for getting back into her yard unseen. Her yard also sat next to the trees but her yard was big and sat empty across from Sally’s house. Granny, after all of these years, was still trying to decide what to do with that piece of empty property.

  As she walked back farther into the trees so it looked like she would have been taking a fall stroll in nature, she came out on her side and decided to sit down on an old stump to rest. Sitting there among the trees reminded Granny of the farm where she had grown up that was still outside of Fuchsia. She hadn’t been back there for many years. It must now look like an abandoned farm. Her kids didn’t know that she still owned that piece of property. Her parents had left it to her. She didn’t think about it often. Her past was in the past. She didn’t go there often in her mind.

  Granny heard a rustle in the grass a few yards away. It was a skunk. Granny decided that it was time to head home. “Mr. Skunk, I know you stunk, but if you try and spray me,” Granny lifted a big rock ready to heave, “I’m going to give you a big thunk.” The skunk looked at Granny; Granny looked at the skunk. It was a stare down and then they both retreated, slowly walking backwards. never taking their eyes off of each other.

  As Granny came out of the woods, she saw Franklin’s car parked in front of her house. As she got close to the door, she heard the sound of laughter. Granny opened the door to her house and found the source of the laughter that she had heard while she was coming up the steps of the porch. It was Angel, the little girl who lived in Mrs. Shrill’s house. She was playing ball with Tank and Little White Poodle while Baskerville was sitting next to her and Fish and Furball were sitting on the back of the couch trying to bat the ball as it sailed past them in the air on its way to its destination on the floor.

  Franklin and Angel’s mother Heather were talking by the window while keeping an eye on the goings on in the living room. They both turned when Granny walked into the room. Angel, seeing Granny, ran up to her and said, “Hi, Granny. I am playing with Itsy and Bitsy and Fish and Little White Poodle. Baskerville is helping me.”

  Granny looked at Franklin with a questioning look in her eye before bending down to Angel’s level to talk to her. “I see that. I didn’t know you knew where I lived. And how do you know Tank and Furball––uh Itsy and Bitsy to you?”

  ‘“Cause my Grandpa came and picked up Baskerville from my house. That’s how I know where you live. Grandpa said we could come along and bring Baskerville home and Itsy and Bitsy are my Grandpa’s pets,” Angel rattled on. “My Grandpa said that it was time we meet you since you are going to be my Grandma so I can call you Granny now. When I told you my other Granny is far away, I meant heaven and now I am going to have a real live Granny again.” Angel stopped the rambling and threw her arms around Granny and gave her a big hug.”

  Granny put her arms around Angel and turned her around while she was doing it so she could look Franklin straight in the eyes. Franklin answered that questioning and piercing look by winking at Granny.

  Granny stood up while still holding on to Angel. “Why don’t you go and continue playing with the shysters in the back yard while I talk to your Grandpa. I think you should be safe back there. Baskerville will protect you. If it’s ok with your mom, that is.”

  Heather nodded her head and all the furry creatures followed Angel out the door, winding their way to the back of the house on the path along the side the house.

  As Granny turned and eyed Franklin, Franklin stepped forward. “Granny, I would like you to meet my daughter Heather. She just moved here recently.”

  Heather put out her hand to shake Granny’s. “Nice to meet you again Granny. I wanted to tell you sooner who I was but my dad thought it would be better, considering everything you have been through, to wait until the time was right. Baskerville seemed to provide that time.”

  “Um, nice to meet you, Heather.”

  “I better check on Angel. I’ll leave you two to talk.” Heather winked at her dad as she walked out the door to find Angel.

  “You didn’t think to tell me this, Franklin Jester Gatsby, and would you mind telling me why that sweet child thinks I’m go
ing to be her Grandma?” Granny picked up her cane and stomped it back down on the floor. Then she went over to her umbrella that was sitting in the corner, picked it up and pointed it at Franklin. “I’m not hearing you answer fast enough.”

  “Now, Hermiony, we’re engaged. Don’t you think it’s time we told my kids? Your children know,” Franklin said with a twinkle in his eye.

  “Don’t give me that, Franklin Gatsby. You know we’re not engaged. You know that was just to keep my kids from harassing me about moving. Thor, Thor, my son, lives right across the street. Do you know how difficult it is doing my investigative work with these murders with Thor living right across the street and now, and now….” Granny started poking him with her umbrella tip, “…your daughter thinks we are engaged and that sweet child will be very disappointed when she finds out that she isn’t going to have a live Granny again, that it was all pretend. This is on you when it falls apart. Do you hear me, Franklin Jester Gatsby? Do you hear me?” Granny stomped the umbrella on the floor and immediately retreated to her room in frustration. She didn’t see the wide grin on Franklin’s face as he left through the door because that was the exact reaction he was expecting and hoped for from Granny. She did drive him crazy but it was a good crazy and so much fun. He had never felt so alive.

  Granny heard the door close. She reached in her pocket for her cell phone so she could see what time it was. When she didn’t find it in her pocket, she walked into her living room and checked the sofa before continuing on into the kitchen. Where had she put that cell phone? Granny paused to look out the window and then she remembered. She had the cell phone in her pocket before she went to Sally’s. She must have dropped it. It wouldn’t be good for her to go over there right now and look for it. The hussy might get suspicious and know Granny was on to her. Granny looked at Mavis’ house and she got an idea. She walked over and picked up her landline phone and dialed Mavis.

 

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