Saving Grace

by Denise Hunter

  “Oh,” Keith said. “Hi.”

  “Hello, Keith.”

  “I tried to call, but it was busy.”

  “We’re kind of in the middle of something …”

  Keith glanced toward the dining room, where the boys were starting to eat despite her request to wait for Linn to return.

  “I didn’t miss a birthday, did I?” Keith asked, referring to the balloons and crepe paper.

  “No, it’s something else.” The boys would no doubt spill the beans about the adoption tomorrow. That was OK. She wondered briefly how he’d react. “What are you doing here? We didn’t get our arrangements mixed up, did we?”

  “I was wondering if I could pick the boys up a couple hours early tomorrow. I was thinking of taking them up to Jenny Lake.”

  “Sure, that’s fine.” She just wanted him gone. “We’ll see you then.”

  “Found it!” Linn called from the top of the stairs. Natalie could hear her bounding down the steps behind her. She was about to turn and tell Linn to slow down, but she saw Keith’s eyes widen, his jaw go slack. Natalie turned in the direction of his gaze.

  Linn. She’d stopped three steps up from the foyer, a look of pure shock on her face. Her body frozen as if it were in a cryonic deep-freeze. All the blood had drained from her pink cheeks, leaving them pasty white. Her eyes looked as if they’d just spied a semi-truck getting ready to barrel her over. The journal slipped from her hand, clanking against the sofa table before hitting the floor.

  “Lindsey … ,” Keith rasped.

  Natalie heard the word from over her shoulder.

  Then the name registered. Lindsey?

  Lindsey. Lindsey. She looked from Keith, then back to Linn. Inside her, fingers of dread curled in a tight fist. Why was he calling her that awful name? The name that had ripped their marriage in two? Why were they staring at each other as if they’d seen ghosts?

  The horrible heaviness in her gut spread to every part of her body. It was Linn, not Lindsey. Right?

  They didn’t hear the question. It only bounced around her mind like a super ball gone wild. This was Linn. Her Linn. She looked back to Keith. His eyes had narrowed as he looked at Linn.

  “What are you doing here?”

  She looked at Linn. The girl’s eyes swung crazily from Keith to Natalie. What was it on her face? Shock? Terror? Yes.

  And guilt.

  Oh, God. Oh, God, no.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

  Paula was floating on a cloud. She’d hardly been able to make it through the evening broadcast without spilling the news to all her viewers: she was almost finished with this pokey little town. Donald had told her this afternoon that their Chicago affiliate had called while she was at lunch. They wanted to set up a time for her to come to Chicago for an interview.

  She’d called immediately and set it up. Miles, the station manager, was eager to have her there; she could tell it in his voice. Next week they were flying her to the big windy city, and she could hardly wait. She looked at the little two-story wooden stores as she drove down Broadway on her way home. Next week she would be driving through downtown Chicago with its majestic skyline along the lake.

  She needed to make plane reservations. She needed to get her hair trimmed and the highlights retouched. She needed a new outfit! Something classy and hip. Would they put her up in a fancy, towering hotel?

  She wondered briefly what David would say. He’d been nothing but cold since their argument about her supposed affair. They had polite conversations and nothing more. He hugged his side of the bed as if her side were infested with the Black Plague.

  She shrugged. His loss, not hers. Despite his righteous attitude, he was the one who owed her an apology. She’d done nothing wrong.

  She pulled into the drive, her heart still flying high, as though it were filled with helium. She was so close to her dream. All her efforts were paying off. Chicago. She could hardly believe it. The temporary job would lead to a permanent one, she just knew it.

  She walked in the door and followed the sounds coming from the kitchen. She didn’t know how David would react to her news. She hoped he could put their differences aside long enough to be excited for her. It would be pure selfishness to do anything else.

  When she walked into the kitchen, David was putting a plate into the dishwasher.

  “Hi,” she said, testing the waters.

  He smiled at her for what seemed like the first time in weeks. “Hi, there.”

  She set her purse on the countertop and studied his face. “Have a good day?”

  “You could say that. Want something to eat? I made a meatloaf. There’s a plate for you in the fridge.”

  She blinked. It was usually self-service around here. Especially lately. She pulled the plate from the fridge and heated it in the microwave. “Thanks. I have some great news, too. But tell me about your day first.” If it had made him this happy, she’d be glad to let him go first. She was just glad to see him back to his old self. And this good mood definitely boded well for his reaction to her news.

  When her food was hot, she placed it on the bar and sat down on a stool while David leaned against the counter.

  “So spill it, what happened?” Paula asked. It had to be something great to get David this excited. She hadn’t seen him like this since her pregnancy. She pushed the thought away and forced a smile on her face.

  “You know how Stewart has been talking about retiring the past few years,” David said.

  “Sure.” The owner of Jackson Hole Realty was way past retirement age and had a dozen realtors working for him, but Stewart had always been a workaholic.

  “You’re not going to believe this. He took me to lunch today and told me he’s decided to sell. He wants to move out to Colorado to be close to his kids.”

  He paused long enough to draw her complete attention. “Paula, he offered me ownership. Full ownership. He said he thought I could take the company to the next level.”

  Paula let her fork down slowly. Ownership in JH Realty? It was a wonderful opportunity. But that meant—David would have permanent roots in Jackson if he owned it.

  David was watching her expectantly. Her mind worked for something to say. She had to handle this just right. “David, that’s so wonderful. He must trust you enormously to leave his baby to you.”

  “No kidding. Stan’s going to be so jealous. He thinks he’s the best thing to hit JH since the low interest rate.”

  “Did you discuss any details?” How was she going to turn this around? She couldn’t stay here. She’d suffocate if she had to live here another year, much less the rest of her life.

  “He’s not in a huge hurry, but he’d like to have everything done by the beginning of winter.”

  “That’s three months away.”

  He pushed his glasses up. “You sound upset.”

  She collected herself. “It’s just sooner than I expected. You have so much to get in order, so much to think about.”

  “What’s to think about? This is my dream.”

  His dream? What about her dream? She’d sacrificed so much for it. She’d sacrificed her baby … Her breath felt as if it had caught in her lungs. She pushed the stool back and walked to the window facing the backyard.

  “What about my dream?” she asked, trying to rein in her temper. “I’m happy for you, David, really, but I don’t want to be stuck here forever.”

  The dishwasher whirred into a different cycle. “You’re happy for me, but you want me to pass it up.” His voice was flat. “Isn’t that thoughtful.”

  She clenched her jaw and turned around. “You’re not the only one who got an offer today, David.”

  That gave him pause for thought. She could almost see the wheels turning before his eyes narrowed. “Who was it? That Dante creep you’ve been fawning all over?”

  Dante … ? What did the job offer have to do with him? She replayed her words in her mind. Got an offer. He thought she’d gotten an offer from a man? Her blood r
aged. “What?”

  “Or was it someone else?”

  “A man? You think I’m talking about an offer from a man?”

  He began to look a little uncomfortable. But not enough. “Is that all you ever think about anymore? That stupid affair I supposedly had? I told you it wasn’t true!”

  His face went hard.

  So did her heart. “You’re never going to believe me. I’m wasting my breath.”

  “I knew there was something going on after you had the miscarriage. You acted so strange. I just couldn’t figure it out. You were relieved, weren’t you?” His voice rose. “Relieved because you wouldn’t have to pretend it was my child anymore.”

  Her insides coiled like a snake getting ready to strike. She had acted strange. She had been hiding something. But not an affair. She couldn’t tell him then, and she couldn’t tell him now.

  “I can see the guilt all over your face.”

  What could she say? She’d dug herself an awful hole, and there was no easy way out. It was better for him to believe the affair than to know the truth. He’d never forgive her for aborting her pregnancy. He wouldn’t understand that it had been her choice, not his.

  She walked out of the kitchen. Behind her she heard him have the last word.

  “That’s what I thought.”

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN

  Natalie looked from Keith to Linn in shock. Denial. Linn couldn’t be Lindsey. She just couldn’t. Lindsey was an awful woman. A hateful witch who’d stolen her husband, her life, her marriage. Lindsey was not a nineteen-year-old girl who’d become a dear friend.

  “What is she doing here?” Keith asked, looking at Natalie.

  “I don’t understand.” The words choked Natalie’s throat. She was all too afraid she understood perfectly. Please, tell me it’s not true. She silently begged it of Keith, of God, of anyone who would say it.

  “I can explain,” said Linn, whose face looked like terror etched in stone.

  “Daddy!” Taylor called. As he got up from his chair, the balloon came loose and floated up to the chandelier.

  “Dad, I thought you were coming tomorrow,” Alex said, coming toward them.

  The boys hugged their father.

  It was too much. Natalie couldn’t assimilate it all. She felt as if she were in someone else’s body, as if this whole thing were happening to someone else. She wished it were.

  Keith was explaining that he would be back for them in the morning.

  “Boys, you can go eat,” Natalie said. Alex complained briefly before obeying. The sudden silence shook the room.

  Linn’s hand gripped the stair railing, the bones of her knuckles standing out like white bony beads. Keith stood in the doorway, still gripping the door handle.

  And Natalie stood in the middle, her heart still searching for another reason Keith may have called Linn by that awful name.

  “What are you doing here?” Keith asked Linn. His jaw had gone hard, and Natalie knew he was angry.

  “It … it’s not what you think,” Linn said, looking at Natalie instead of Keith.

  Natalie read the fear in Linn’s eyes but felt detached from it. “What is it then, Linn?” Natalie asked.

  “You’re pregnant,” Keith said.

  The words seemed out of place. Her heart froze. The baby. Keith and Linn. How long ago had Keith and Linn broken up? Her thoughts flashed back to all the conversations she’d had with Linn about the baby’s father. Facts. She needed to remember facts. Linn had dated the father for almost two years. He didn’t care about the baby. But did he know about the baby? She looked at Keith, whose eyes had gone wider. Her thoughts spun dizzily as a chill worked its way up her spine. Oh, please.

  Keith swore. “You’re pregnant.” This time the word held revulsion. “Will someone tell me what the—what she’s doing here? Is this some kind of a sick joke?”

  If it was a joke, it was on Natalie, but it wasn’t funny.

  “I didn’t mean for any of this to happen.” Linn’s eyes clouded with tears.

  Natalie couldn’t bring herself to care about Linn’s pain. It was obvious by the guilt on the girl’s face. She was Lindsey. She wasn’t the sweet young girl Natalie had thought her to be. She wasn’t the naive girl or the self-conscious teenager. She was Lindsey. The Other Woman.

  The flashbacks started. She remembered the condom falling from the pocket of Keith’s pants, she remembered how she sank to the floor when he admitted to the affair, she remembered him telling her the marriage was over.

  It was starting to soak in now, to feel more real, but with the reality came an ugly feeling. Just the tip of it, like the first drop of rain from gathering storm clouds. She felt the enormity of what was coming and was helpless to stop it.

  “Is it mine?” Keith asked.

  Natalie looked at Linn in time to see her slight nod.

  Oh, God, no. How could this happen?

  “How could you let this happen?” Keith said. He cursed again, slamming his hand on the door. It bounced against the wall. “I don’t want it.”

  “I know,” Linn whispered. “I was going to put it up for—”

  She looked at Natalie. Adoption. Yes, well. That was all going to change, wasn’t it? It was Keith’s baby. Linn and Keith’s baby. She wanted that baby now like she wanted a tumor.

  A thought occurred to Natalie that sent suspicion careening into the wall of her stomach. Had Linn known all along who she was? Hadn’t Natalie talked about Keith? She had to know. And Linn had kept it from her.

  “How long have you known?” Natalie asked Linn, anger bubbling in her gut.

  Linn looked at Keith as if he were going to save her the trouble of answering. Ha! He looked mad enough to tar and feather her.

  “I didn’t know for a long time, I swear!”

  “Will somebody please tell me what’s going on?” Keith grated.

  Natalie held Linn’s gaze for what seemed like minutes. “I’ll tell you what’s going on. Your little tramp has connived her way into my life. She was going to pawn your baby off on me without even telling me whose it was.” Her voice had risen, shaking and out of control.

  She must’ve gotten the boys’ attention because Keith went to the table and said something to them. A moment later, they carried their fine china plates out the patio door.

  Natalie turned and glared at Linn.

  Lindsey.

  Whoever she was.

  The girl’s lips quivered, but not even the tears that chased each other down her face softened Natalie. This was way beyond tears and sympathy and compassion. This was too much.

  “I was afraid to tell you,” Linn whispered. “I didn’t mean for this to happen.”

  “You mean you didn’t mean for me to find out. Were you just going to let me raise your and Keith’s child and never tell me? That’s sick, Linn.”

  Keith returned. “You’re going to adopt Linn’s baby?”

  Absurdly, a gurgle of laughter bubbled up in her throat, but she strangled it. “Of course, I’m not.”

  “Natalie, please …” Linn reached out her hand.

  Natalie batted it away. “Don’t touch me.”

  “I didn’t know in the beginning, I swear!” Linn said.

  “When did you find out, Linn?” Natalie asked. It didn’t matter now, not really. But she had to know how long she’d been played the fool.

  Linn’s wiped her face.

  “How long?” Natalie’s tone demanded an answer.

  “Since that day we met at the park.”

  “Which one?” How many times had she taken Linn to the park with the boys? How many times had she included her in her little family? For heaven’s sake, she’d taken the girl into her own home.

  “That first time,” Linn said. “The first time I came here and saw the house.”

  Natalie thought back to that day. It seemed forever ago, but when was it? It was the day after the bomb had gone off at the clinic. Natalie had been stewing about the news coverage that day.
It had been May. She felt her jaw harden, her teeth squeeze together.

  “That was three months ago,” Natalie said.

  “Please don’t be mad, Natalie. I swear I didn’t mean to—”

  She laughed then. At the absurdity of Linn’s request. At the absurdity of this whole situation. Don’t be mad. I’ve only slept with your husband, broken up your marriage, and tried to pawn off our love child on you. Please don’t be mad.

  She looked at Keith. He had a look on his face she’d never seen before. Did he think she’d gone mad? Maybe she had. Had anyone else on this planet ever been subjected to such a mess? She was entitled to a little madness. What had she done to deserve this? What have I done, God?

  “Why didn’t you tell me about the baby?” Keith drilled Linn with a look.

  Linn sniffed. “You didn’t want it.”

  “That’s right, I didn’t. So why’d you get pregnant to begin with?”

  “I wasn’t trying to!”

  “You should’ve had an abortion then. Look how far along you are! I don’t want another child.” He ran his hand through his hair. “It’s not too late, is it? You can still have an abortion.”

  This wasn’t happening. Her ex-husband and his mistress, standing in front of her, fighting about the child they’d conceived. Natalie put her hands over her ears and closed her eyes. She just wanted them gone. Both of them.

  “Get out,” Natalie said. “Get out.” She pulled her hands away from her ears. The two ex-lovers were still exchanging words, Keith’s heated, Linn’s regretful. They didn’t seem to hear Natalie.

  “Get out! Both of you, just get out!”

  Keith looked at her as if just realizing she still stood there.

  She looked at Lindsey. “Get your things. You’re leaving.” She looked at Keith and pulled the door from his deadened fingers. “Go.” Her tone brooked no argument.

  He looked back at Lindsey. “You figure it out. I don’t want anything to do with this baby.”

  When he left, Natalie closed the door behind him with stunning calm. As she turned, her eyes caught sight of the balloon that had crawled across the dining room ceiling and was now flying out of reach to the highest peak of the vaulted ceiling.