Leap of Faith (Iris Boys Book 3)

by Lucy Smoke

  "What's wrong?"

  I laughed. "Nothing's wrong. I just miss you guys. And Knix said you went and saw my mom?"

  "She's doing fine," Bellamy said. I could tell he was smiling too, and it only made mine grow. I felt so silly and foolish, grinning and smiling while talking to boys. Like I was back at the start of high school again. When all the other girls had gone boy crazy, I had gone job hunting. This was a strange feeling.

  "Did her doctors say anything about her medication?" I asked. “How did she act?" The last time I had been there and talked to the doctors, just before we left for Alex's, they had told me that her mood swings might increase with the new medication they were giving her. I hadn't noticed anything, but from a lifetime of living with her, I knew changes in medications sometimes took weeks and months to get used to.

  "She was a little tired during my visit, but all in all, she was good," Bellamy promised. "I didn't get a chance to talk to the doctors, though. I'll see if I can the next time I go. She asked how you were; I told her you were checking out colleges. She seemed pretty excited about that."

  "Thank you." Bellamy’s breath puffed through the phone, but I stopped him from whatever he was going to say. “…and before you tell me that a thank you isn’t necessary—like Knix—I’m going to tell you, too bad. I’m thankful and you’re gonna know it.”

  Bellamy laughed, and it sounded like coming home. My own breath caught, and Marv’s words slid back through my mind. If you choose him, I’m sure you’ll be just fine.

  Our conversation turned to Cleo—Clarissa was really enjoying her, apparently. Knix and Bellamy were too busy to take care of her still. I wondered if I’d have a cat to come home to. When I finally hung up the phone I decided that Marv and I needed to talk. I found him in the kitchen, where he said he would be, but when I arrived, I wasn’t quite sure what I was seeing. At first, I thought I had accidentally walked in on something embarrassing, then I realized what I was actually seeing. Marv's firm backside faced outward as he bent over and rummaged through the pantry.

  “What are you doing?” I asked.

  Marv straightened and looked over his shoulder. “We don't have anything to make for dinner tonight,” he said. “I thought I might find something to set out, but no such luck. How was your talk with Knix?”

  “It was fine,” I said absently, peeking over his shoulder. Wow, he was right. Their pantry was even more barren than the duplex. “Do you need to go to the grocery store?”

  He grimaced but nodded. “Yeah, I think so. I’m certainly not planning to eat at that cafeteria for every meal.” The pasta had been good, but I could understand not wanting to walk across campus every time I got hungry.

  “Okay, then let’s go.” I spotted his keys on the counter and swiped them before he could. “I’m driving.”

  “Oh no,” he said, “you don’t even have your license yet!” Marv rushed out after me as I hightailed it to the front door.

  “I have my permit and you’re 21, so it’ll be fine.” I opened the door and skipped out, pausing when I realized the BMW was nowhere in sight.

  Marv closed the front door and smirked. “What’s wrong?” he asked. “I thought you said you were driving?”

  “Very funny.” I looked down the street—nothing. “Where’s the car?”

  “It’s right there.” Marv moved closer, so close I could feel his breath on the back of my neck as he reached around me and pointed to the nondescript, dark green sedan sitting in the driveway. Blinking away the haze of confusing attraction that Marv had unwittingly brought about, I stared at the car as he slid around me and descended the front steps. One second we were joking and the next, I couldn’t breathe for fear my heart would leap out of my chest over how close he was, how his body just barely brushed against mine. “Knix didn’t want us to stand out.”

  He walked to the driver’s side door and popped it open. “Hope you can drive a stick.” My eyes rounded, and I shook my head. “Oh, no?” His smirk grew into a full-fledged grin. “Guess you’re not driving, then.”

  I narrowed my gaze on him and when I passed to head around to the passenger side door, I smacked him in the chest with his keys. Marv’s laughter followed me as I got into the car.

  “Awww, don’t pout, Sunshine,” Marv cajoled as he clipped his seatbelt on and started the car. There was a short bulbous looking stick shift in the console and he adjusted it as he pulled out of the driveway and headed for the end of the street.

  “I’m not pouting,” I said, “just drive.”

  He laughed again, pulling out into light traffic. “As you wish.”

  The car in front of us slowed to a near stop as it turned and so did we, unintentionally following. "So..." I began, leaning back in the passenger seat, eyeing the precarious license plate. Before I could continue though, a cell phone buzzed, drawing my attention away from both the license plate and what I was about to say. Since mine was in my bag and my bag was by my feet and I certainly didn't feel the vibrations against my ankle, I knew it wasn't mine. Marv shifted to the side, pulling his out of the back pocket of his white-washed jeans. He hadn’t even glanced at the screen before he noted me staring at him. He handed the phone over without commentary.

  “Thanks,” Marv mumbled as I flicked the screen to unlock it.

  Texas: Got G, heading out.

  I relayed the message to Marv. "What do you want me to say?"

  "Tell him okay and let me know when he gets there."

  Marv: Okay. Let me know when you get there.

  I pressed the side button to turn the screen off and set it in the console between us. "How is it?" I finally asked, turning sideways in the seat to face him. The seatbelt cut across my chest and over my shoulder, pulling tighter until it slipped over my arm.

  "How is what?" Marv clicked the blinker and repositioned the gearshift as he slowed down.

  "Living with Grayson," I said. "I was a little worried that you two would be at each other's throats since you don't like each other all that much." If my admission surprised him, he didn't show it.

  Marv waited until he had made the turn before his eyes slid my way. "We're fine," he said sharply before turning back to focus on the road.

  I tilted my head and watched him, narrowing my eyes as I did. "You sure about that?”

  Marv’s hands tightened on the steering wheel. “We’ll work together and get through this and then he can be on his way.”

  “Why can’t he stay?” I asked. Then in a smaller voice, I whispered to myself, “Maybe I want him to.”

  “No.”

  There was no explanation. No outburst. Just a sudden and quiet “no” as my answer. I stared at him in surprise, then narrowed my eyes. “Why does Grayson bother you so much?” I persisted. “It's obvious there's history there. He's here, he's with us—why can't you just let whatever happened between you two go?"

  Marv clenched his jaw so hard I thought he was going to crack a few teeth. "Caruso is not with us," he practically growled. “The only reason he's on this case is because of his brother. Don't forget that. Caruso isn't here to help us, or to help you. He's here to look out for the only thing he cares about, himself."

  I shook my head. "I don't understand your animosity. Grayson doesn't seem as bad as you make him out to be. What did he do to you that was so bad?"

  Marv shifted the gears angrily, snapping his wrist to the side as we slowed down and turned into the parking lot of the grocery store. He pulled into a spot and then jerked the car to a stop, yanking up the emergency brake before turning to me. "You want to know what he did?" he asked, his eyes dark, his expression furious.

  "Yes," I snapped, "maybe then I'll understand why you're being such an asshole."

  "He was in Iris, Harlow." Then, quieter, he said, “Well, almost. He was in training for a brief period. He was never fully inducted. But that doesn’t matter, you can’t trust him.”

  I listened with a quiet stillness as my lips pinched down in frustration. Marv’s gaze wa
s filled with volatile emotions and it was that expression that kept me from lashing out in anger and irritation. He technically still hadn’t answered my question, though he had given me a hint as to why whatever Grayson did was being treated like a betrayal. Because it was. To Iris as much as Marv.

  They both had their own thoughts about each other, and I wondered if either of them was right. Grayson obviously didn’t feel as though Iris was safe. Marv obviously didn’t feel as though Grayson was safe—for others. I sighed and shook my head.

  When my phone buzzed, I pulled it out but didn’t recognize the number, so I slipped it in my pants pocket and turned back to the man next to me. “Marv—”

  “Let’s go.” He cut me off and I jerked towards him, reaching out to snag his shirt as he turned the car off and unlatched his seatbelt, quickly stepping out and away from me. My hand closed around air, and I released a subtle growl of frustration.

  I frowned even harder as, instead of walking around to open my door for me as he normally would, he strode purposefully towards the front of the grocery store. One way or another, he would have to get over his dislike of Grayson because I had a feeling—despite what Marv or Grayson believed—that Grayson would be sticking around for quite a while.

  Chapter 5

  So, how were classes?” Lizzie laid sprawled across her twin sized mattress in nothing more than skimpy, cotton pajama bottoms and a tank top. Little fluffy poodles danced across the fabric. I shrugged, doodling in the margins of a class syllabus, trying to tie my mind to something—anything but my worry over Erika and my frustration with Marv. “That bad, huh?” She rolled over, propping herself up on her hands.

  “It was fine,” I said absently. “It’s just different is all.”

  “Or…there could be something else bugging you.” Lizzie watched the movement of my hand as I drew a giant leaf coming out of the corner of the page. “Like…maybe…the guys you were sitting in the cafeteria with, hmmm?” she suggested with a perfectly elegant, arched brow.

  I paused, slowly raising my head to meet her gaze from across the room. “What?” My eyes slid to the side, to where my phone lay on the desk, but the screen remained black. They still hadn’t called or texted with updates on what Grayson and Texas may have found.

  “You know who I’m talking about. I saw you with those two guys during lunch in the cafeteria.” Lizzie kicked her legs up and smiled. “So, tell me, which one are you dating?”

  A blush stole across my cheeks and my brain fizzled out. Which one was I dating? Um, both? And a little more? I couldn’t say that. I grimaced.

  “You know the lady who helped you move in—Clarissa, right? Well, she did say something about a bunch of guys. Are you all like friends from the same hometown or something?” Lizzie pushed, curious enough that she was either blatantly ignoring my discomfort or she was taking it as a challenge.

  “Or something,” I mumbled, before speaking up. “Yeah, we’re from the same hometown. Some of the guys are going to school here too.”

  “That’s lucky, isn’t it?” she commented.

  A knock on the door saved me from further answering her. Lizzie eyed me as I scrambled off the side of the bed, opened the door, and nearly shut it again.

  “Oh, who is that?” Lizzie teased from behind me.

  Ignoring her, I slid out into the hall and slammed the door closed behind me, pressing my back against it as though I could keep it shut—even though the door swung inward not outward—with just my body. “What are you doing here?” I hissed at Grayson.

  He blinked down at me, nonplussed. “I came to pick you up,” he replied as if it were the most natural thing in the world for him to just show up on my doorstep. Which… now that I thought about it, wasn’t exactly abnormal for him.

  I shook my head, dispelling my errant thoughts. “Why?”

  “Didn’t you get Texas’ message?”

  Crap. My phone was back in the room. I thought I’d been checking it regularly, but it never lit up. I must have missed it. I shook my head.

  “Well, we’re meeting back at the house,” he said. “I came to pick you up.”

  The door behind me jerked open, and I nearly tripped over Lizzie as she grinned wickedly up at Grayson. “Who’s this?” she said, slanting a teasing glance my way.

  A slow smile crawled over Grayson’s mouth as he reached forward, snagging Lizzie’s hand and pressing a kiss to her knuckles. “Enchanté,” he said.

  “Sleaze ball,” I muttered as I moved back into the room, grabbing my phone and keys before scooting back into the hall. “Let’s go, lady killer.”

  Lizzie's mouth curled downward as she took her hand from Grayson's and wiped it down her side. "Sorry, buddy," she said, "you're barking up the wrong tree."

  "Ahh, well," Grayson shrugged, "always worth a try on a pretty girl."

  "Why don't you focus on your pretty girl?" Lizzie suggested with a quirked brow. "After all, it seems like you've got some competition."

  "Oh, my God." I slid past her quickly, both mortified and exasperated. Grabbing Grayson's hand, I started off down the hallway, dragging him with me. "We're not dating," I defended. "We're just friends."

  Lizzie pursed her lips and glanced down at our hands. "Uh huh."

  I sighed, shooting a glare at Grayson. God, sometimes, he just made me want to give him a high five...in that damn smug face of his...with a chair. "Okay, yeah, well, um...don't wait up." I didn't stop to hear a reply, instead continued to drag Grayson away, my face flaming.

  The hot southern twilight air slid over my skin as I pushed through the building's side door. "Can you not?" I snapped, looking over my shoulder.

  Grayson's big blue eyes blinked at me, all fake innocence. "What?"

  "Oh, never mind." I dropped his hand and strode down the side steps until we reached the small courtyard opening alongside the dorm. "What did you and Texas find?"

  Shoving a hand through his thick hair, he pulled on a chunk and sighed. "As much as I want to tell you, I promised Tex that I'd wait until we got back before we started in on what we found."

  I frowned, narrowing my gaze on his face. "Tex?" Since when did he call Texas by his nickname?

  Grayson shook his head and retook my hand in his. "Come on."

  I followed him down another set of steps, around the side of the building and towards a student walkway leading towards the other side of campus. For a second, I let myself look around and take in the college. Tall brick buildings. Rich green grass. Dozens of trees lining the pathways. Students on bikes, students in workout clothes—jogging past. If things had been different, maybe I would have been here under different circumstances. I wonder, briefly, if this is what my brother experienced when he went to college in New York. I haven't spoken to him in so long, sometimes I think back and feel as though I dreamed our entire childhood. Sometimes he's just a shadow in my memories.

  "Hey," Grayson's fingers appeared in front of my face, "you okay there, Babydoll?"

  "Huh?" I blinked, reaching up to shove his fingers away. I stopped when I realized that our hands were still connected. Dropping my hand, Grayson's fingers squeezed mine. "Yeah," I answered. "Just thinking."

  "'Bout what?" he asked as we started into a crosswalk.

  I stared down at our twined hands. Grayson would get it, wouldn't he? He had a brother just as distant as mine. Maybe not geographically, but...I wonder how he coped.

  We reached the corner and I opened my mouth. "My brother doesn't call me," I admitted. Grayson froze, one foot on the edge of the concrete and the other on the pavement. When he turned, I scrambled to explain. "I mean, he used to—call me, that is, but I haven't seen him in four years. My mom kind of threw him out and he left, and he used to call to check up on me, but he doesn't anymore."

  "Okay..." Grayson's brows were drawn down, darkening the shadows over his eyes. "And that bugs you?"

  I bit my lip. Did it? I wouldn't be thinking about it so hard if it didn't, right? I nodded. "Yeah," I finally sa
id. I looked up at him. "Doesn't it bother you that your brother doesn't come to you for help? Mine barely talks to me. It's like he doesn't even want to admit that we're family, or he only called out of obligation."

  Grayson stiffened when I mentioned his brother but didn't let that stop him. "Does he know about you joining Iris?"

  I shook my head. "No way," I scoffed. "My mom doesn't even know—not really. I told Michael that I’m working now, and things are better, and since then, it's been harder to reach him."

  "And you're just now realizing this?" Grayson snapped. "If he's your brother, why don't you call him?"

  Shock ricocheted through me. I dropped his hand and stepped back, both feet on the pavement. "I-I—"

  "It sounds to me like all this bullshit with my brother is reminding you about the shitty relationship you have with your brother. Don't use me to fucking constitute your family relationships."

  I clenched my teeth. "I wasn't," I snapped back.

  A car turned down the street a block or so up, the headlights crossing over Grayson's face as the sun sunk below the horizon. His eyes were on fire, blazing with an anger that I didn't understand. Once again, Grayson had completely turned—flipping on some unknown switch. Trying to navigate his damn emotions was like trying to walk through a minefield.

  "If you're so worried about your brother's distance, why don't you call him?" he asked. "At least you can."

  "I—" The sound of my voice was cut off by the sound of an engine revving. Just as I turned towards the noise, the headlights from the car came crashing towards me.

  "Shit!" Grayson's hands latched onto my wrists, yanking me towards him. My feet collided with the edge of the pavement, sending tingles of pain up my tendons. Air shot over my back and the heat from the car's front end was so close that I could feel it through the fabric of my clothes. My heart thudded against my ribcage—a trapped bird, terrified but unable to take flight.

  Grayson cursed again and flung himself backward as my legs crumpled against his and I landed, my face smacking into his chest as the car raced away. I blinked into the smooth cotton, my limbs trembling as I slowly came down from what almost happened.