After Me

by Joyce Scarbrough

  The apartment was completely dark except for a light I saw coming from under a door to my right. I knew the room at the end of the hall belonged to Annalee’s mom, and I remembered that the other door in the hall had been a bathroom, so the one with the light must be Annalee’s.

  I started to turn the knob as quietly as possible and stopped when I heard muffled voices. At first I thought they were coming from down the hall, then I realized they were inside Annalee’s room. Maybe her mom had seen that she was upset when she got home and was in there talking to her, trying to soothe her daughter’s broken heart. I put my ear against the door and heard sobs, but they weren’t the kind caused by heartache.

  They were the kind caused by abject terror.

  The door was locked, but one shove with my shoulder banged it open. In the dim light made even dimmer by the red filter over my vision, I could barely make out Annalee on the bed with Rufus on top of her, his scrawny ass grinding obscenely between her legs and one of his hands covering her mouth. She saw me and her terrified eyes pleaded for help as her muffled scream filled the room.

  I grabbed Rufus by his greasy ponytail and threw him against the far wall where he slid to the floor in a crumpled heap. I was both furious and terrified at the same time, but I had to see how bad Annalee was hurt before I finished with him. Her shirt was bunched up around her neck and her jeans were off, but her underwear was only partly pulled down from her hips, making me hope I’d stopped him in time. She was sobbing uncontrollably, and I wrapped my arms around her.

  “Shh… it’s okay, you’re safe now. Did he—”

  “Hey, I got something for you, bitch!” Rufus yelled behind me. “You fucked with the wrong dude this time!”

  I straightened up and turned to see him pointing a small pistol at me, his pants still puddled comically around his ankles.

  “What little old lady did you mug to get that thing?” I said. “Or is it a cigarette lighter?”

  “It’s big enough to blow your ass away,” he said. “Big enough to put you on your knees in front of me like your little friend was before you got here!”

  My vision went blood red.

  I tackled him and got both hands around his throat, vaguely registering the sound of the gun going off as we fell to the floor. The astonished look on his face when the shot had no effect on me almost made me laugh while I choked the life out of him, especially with the way his eyes were bugging out in his reddening face. But just before I tightened my grip to finish him off, I felt Annalee pulling on my shoulder.

  “Don’t kill him, Gwen! We need to make it look like suicide.”

  Her words penetrated my fury and made the red filter recede enough to let me think rationally a moment and realize she was making sense. The gun was pressed into my stomach between Rufus and me, and as soon as I released his throat, he pulled the trigger again, probably thinking he must’ve missed the first time. I sneered at him and grabbed his wrist, then I forced his arm up so the gun was pointed at his temple.

  “Annalee, don’t look,” I said. “I’m about to make this maggot blow his brains out.”

  “No, not here.” Her voice sounded eerily calm. “I don’t want his disgusting blood in my room. There’s a vacant lot across the street behind the gas station. Let’s take him there.”

  I took the gun from Rufus then turned to look at her in amazed admiration. “You were right, girlfriend. We were destined for each other.”

  Rufus began babbling incoherently, so I clocked him upside the head with the gun to shut him up. I couldn’t stand his sniveling, plus he’d be easier to transport that way. Annalee got a trash bag from the kitchen and we stuffed him into it, then I hoisted the bag over my shoulder.

  “You need to stay here,” I told her. “It’s not gonna be pretty, and we shouldn’t take a chance on connecting you to any of this.”

  “No way,” she said. “After what he did to me and the things he’s done to my mom for so long, I can’t wait to watch him die.”

  I couldn’t really blame her.

  “Speaking of your mom, where is she?”

  “Passed out in her room.” She looked at the floor. “She’s been drinking and doing drugs with him all day while I thought she was at work.”

  “You sure you can handle this?” I asked, although I felt certain she could. She was pretty freaking awesome.

  “Positive.”

  “Okay, let’s get it over with.”

  She went outside to make sure the coast was clear, then we sprinted across the street and ducked into the shadows behind the closed Chevron station. The vacant lot was littered with trash and abandoned items, so I picked a dark spot in the middle between the rusted shell of a washing machine and a pile of old tires. Rufus groaned inside the bag when I dropped him on the ground.

  “Make him pull the trigger himself so there won’t be any gunpowder residue on your hands,” Annalee said while I was opening the bag. “And make sure you wipe your fingerprints off the gun before you give it to him.”

  “Wow, you really pay attention to those forensic shows.” I laughed, then something occurred to me. “Be sure to stand behind me so he can’t shoot you after I give him the gun. You’re not bulletproof like me.” I kicked Rufus in the side. “Pull up your pants then get on your feet.”

  He tried to crawl away, but I stopped him with a kick to the middle of his back.

  “I’m gonna give you a choice here, asshole. You can do what I tell you and die quickly, or I can rip off little pieces of you one by one and let you bleed out. And guess which part I’m gonna tear off first.”

  He started blubbering but stopped when I rolled him over with my foot and kicked him in the gut.

  “Which is it gonna be, maggot? Quick or slow?”

  “No, please! I’ll do it—gimme the gun!”

  I made sure Annalee got safely behind me while I wiped off the gun with my shirt before I tossed it to him. Predictably, he pointed it at me.

  “You stupid bitch! I’m gonna blow you away!”

  “Go ahead and shoot, dumbass. Here, I’ll give you a target.” I pulled down the neck of my shirt and patted a spot over my heart. “Aim for here.”

  He looked unsure for a second, but he pulled the trigger and hit a spot between my collarbone and my bra. The tiny bullet made a bigger hole than I expected but began closing up immediately. I watched until it was gone, then I looked up at Rufus with a smile.

  “Nice shot, shithead. Now put the gun in your mouth and point it where your brain would be if you had one.”

  “No, please…” He dropped the gun and crawled over to clutch at my feet. “I swear I’ll leave and never come back if you let me go! Please…”

  “Shut up!” I shook him off my foot like something I’d stepped in. “I don’t believe anything you say.”

  He rolled over and got to his knees, sobbing into his steepled hands. “No, I swear it! I’ll never come around her or her old lady again. Please don’t kill me!”

  “Why should I have any pity for you, you pathetic waste of oxygen?” The red filter was returning rapidly to my vision. “You sure as hell didn’t have any for Annalee when she was crying and begging you not to rape her. You thought you were some kinda badass, didn’t you? I bet it even got you off to hear how terrified she was. Well, look who’s on their knees now!”

  “I’m sorry, plea—”

  I kicked him in the head and sent him sprawling onto his back, then I went to stand over him with my foot on his throat. It took all my self control to keep from decapitating him.

  “I’m sick of your bawling! You’re a worthless piece of shit who made the mistake of hurting my best friend, and I’m gonna make sure you never hurt any other girls.” I kicked his legs apart and moved my foot to his crotch. “Pick up that gun and blow your brains out, or I’m gonna stomp your balls into the pavement and start ripping off pieces of you to go in that garbage bag.”

  He might’ve been a moron dangling from the bottom rung of the intellectual
ladder, but he understood enough to know when he was totally screwed. His hand searched the ground beside him until it touched the gun, then he grabbed it and put it in his mouth, tears and snot running down his arm.

  I pressed down with my foot. “Pull the trigger, asshole.”

  For all her earlier tough talk, Annalee ended up hiding her face against my back and didn’t see his head implode.

  “Wow,” I said. “That cute little gun had more kick to it than I thought.”

  Chapter Twenty-five

  When we were safely back in Annalee’s room, she fell apart. I held her until she stopped shaking and her sobs had become sniffles.

  “It’s okay if you don’t want to talk about what happened,” I said. “But I’ll listen if you want to tell me. It’s up to you.”

  She told me how Rufus and her mother had arrived shortly after she got home, before she’d had a chance to wash off her makeup or change clothes. Rufus had never given her a second glance before except to mock her or tell her how ugly she was, but she said she could tell immediately that he noticed the change in her looks. After he went to the bedroom with her mother, Annalee had locked her own bedroom door, but it was a flimsy lock that anyone could easily pick. Rufus came into her room sometime later and started talking about how good she looked and saying filthy things to her. When she threatened to scream if he didn’t get out, he showed her the gun he said he’d gotten to take care of her “psycho friend” and told her he’d shoot her if she didn’t do what he told her.

  “He made me kneel in front of him, then he made me…” She started to sob again and buried her face in her pillow.

  I put my arms around her and cried with her. “You don’t have to talk about that. He can’t hurt you anymore.”

  When she could speak coherently again, she said, “It was bad, but not as bad as it would’ve been if you hadn’t got here when you did. How did you know I was in trouble?”

  “I didn’t. I came to talk to you about what happened with Lew tonight. I was afraid you were mad at me.”

  She looked totally confused. “Mad at you for what?”

  Considering what we’d just been through together, it all seemed pretty stupid now and made me wish I’d pretended I was there because I’d had some kind of premonition like she had thought.

  “I was afraid your feelings were hurt because Lew paid all that attention to you tonight and then told you he wanted to be alone with me.”

  “You really thought that?” When I nodded, she said, “I knew he was just being nice to me. And anybody could see how he feels about you from the way he kept looking at you all night.”

  “What are you—?”

  “Gwen, he’s crazy about you. Besides, I told you he and I were only friends.”

  I knew better, but I didn’t think I should let on that I knew she loved him. It would only embarrass her.

  “Are you sure you’re okay with it?” I said. “Because our friendship means more to me than any guy.”

  She hugged me. “Thank you, but I know that’s a lie. And like I told Lew, I just want you to be happy. Even more now after everything you’ve done for me.”

  We checked on her mom and knew she hadn’t choked on her own vomit when we heard her snoring. It was hard to do, but I kept my opinion about the woman to myself for Annalee’s sake. We spotted Rufus’s shoes and wallet on the floor, so I put them in the garbage bag to drop in a Dumpster on the way home. Annalee walked outside with me when I left, and we both looked across the street.

  “I guess they’ll find him sometime tomorrow,” I said. “You think they’ll come around asking questions?”

  She shrugged. “Maybe as a formality to see if anybody heard anything. But it’s not like gunshots or dead junkies are anything unusual around here. And since he doesn’t have any ID on him, at least they won’t be asking about him by name in case my mom is functional tomorrow.”

  “You think she’ll just figure he took off again?”

  “Yeah, he did it all the time. Maybe she’ll finally get straight without his influence.”

  I thought that was about as likely as Flo doing standup at God’s next birthday party, but I kept that to myself too.

  “If anything happens, make sure you call me,” I said. “I left Karen and Brad’s number on your nightstand.”

  “Okay, I will.” She hugged me one last time. “Thanks again for saving my life.”

  I returned her hug. “Maybe I could’ve saved my own life if I’d had you for a friend.”

  I took off and was glad to make it home without encountering anybody else. Both Zombie Girl and her alter ego had definitely had enough excitement for one night. All I wanted was a scalding hot shower to wash off every trace of Rufus then to lie on my bed and spend the next couple of hours thinking about nothing but Lew. Not very Superhero-ish, but I was still a rookie after all.

  And the truth was I didn’t want to think about what I’d done to Rufus, because I was afraid to admit how much I had secretly been hoping he would refuse to pull the trigger so I’d get the chance to rip him apart. The thought horrified me now, but while I’d been consumed with the red fury, the prospect had been scarily exciting. I was afraid I was starting to enjoy my job too much. The truth was I liked playing Zombie Girl and getting justice for girls like Annalee and Caitlin.

  And that made me even less eager to find BOSSMAN and have to stop.

  * * *

  At breakfast the next morning, when I told the family I’d invited Lew over for supper, domestic pandemonium reigned.

  “Good Lord, what am I going to serve!” Karen abandoned her omelet and began pulling out cookbooks.

  “You don’t need to impress him,” I said. “He took me to a Cuban sandwich shop in West Flagler. Anything you want to fix will be fine.”

  “Did he say he’d play chess with me?” Nathan asked breathlessly.

  “Yes, Nateman.” I threw a piece of onion from my omelet at him. “Try not to hyperventilate when he gets here, okay?”

  “Did you know his family moved to the Grove from Fisher Island?” Brad asked. “The president of our homeowner’s association told me they paid their dues in advance for the next five years and threw in three grand as a donation.” He shook his head and sighed. “Can’t imagine why anybody would move here from that place.”

  “Well, for God’s sake don’t ask him about it,” Karen said before I had the chance. “In fact, don’t mention money to him at all.”

  “Karen’s right,” I said. “He doesn’t like to talk about that stuff.”

  Brad frowned at both of us over his coffee cup. “Maybe you should give me that list of approved topics so I won’t embarrass you and Gwen with my crass ignorance.”

  “Just talk to him like he lives down the street,” I said. “He’s not a snob. And he’s not slumming either in case you’re wondering why he wants to hang out with me.”

  “That never entered my mind,” Brad said. “He obviously appreciates young ladies who are beautiful and smart.”

  I smiled. “Thanks, Brad. And you’re allowed to say stuff like that as much as you want.”

  * * *

  Karen decided on lasagna for supper since it was one of her specialties. She wouldn’t let me help her cook—as if I would’ve been much help—but she did let me give the already spotless living room and den another cleaning.

  At quarter to six, Nathan yelled up the stairs from his stakeout post at the front window to tell me he saw Lew’s Corvette coming down the street. For all my casual attitude with the family, my stomach felt as if it were hosting the butterfly Olympics as I checked my hair and makeup in the mirror one last time before going downstairs to let him in.

  When I opened the door, Lew greeted me with a bouquet of flowers and a smile that still did a number on my knees.

  “I hope those are for Karen,” I said.

  “Yep.” He winked at me. “Got something else for you, but you can’t have it until later.”

  The butterflies in
my stomach concluded their qualifying events and commenced with the semi-finals.

  “I see you’re still wearing the camouflage.” I pulled him inside. “You know I’m on to you, Triple C.”

  “I have no idea what you’re talking about,” he said. “Oxfords are classic.”

  The lasagna was a hit with everyone, and I thought I gave a convincing performance for my part. The conversation was polite and pleasant with nothing embarrassing for anyone. Lew was so comfortable talking to Karen and Brad that he quickly put them both at ease, and I could tell they really liked him. Nathan, of course, spent the whole meal gazing at Lew in unabashed hero worship. Karen had forbidden him from asking Lew to play chess, so when Lew suggested a game as soon as we finished dessert, Nathan polished off his cheesecake in two bites.

  Lew explained the game to me while they played, and although I learned the names of the pieces and their moves, the strategy remained a complete mystery to me. After two games, Lew must’ve felt sorry for me because he set up the board in a famous problem composed by Vladimir Nabokov and challenged Nathan to solve it on his own after we left.

  I hadn’t cleared the rest of the night with Karen and Brad yet, and I wasn’t sure how to ask their permission to go with Lew. I obviously couldn’t tell them I was joining him for his nightly memorial to his dead brother, and I also couldn’t say I wanted to go suck face with him in the swing at the end of his pier. In keeping with his talent for surprising me, Lew solved the problem for both of us.

  “Thanks for inviting me to supper, Mrs. Sherman,” he said. “That was the best lasagna I’ve ever had, including when I was in Italy.”

  Karen blushed. “Thank you, Lew. And thank you for the beautiful wildflowers.”

  Brad held out his hand. “Come back anytime, son. It was a pleasure having you.”

  “Thank you, sir. Actually, I was hoping you’d let me borrow Gwen a little while longer. The Draconid meteor shower peaks tonight, and the end of our pier is a great place to see shooting stars.”